Homestar Runner Wiki - User contributions [en]

the movies

Halcyon1234 — Mon, 23 Apr 2007 07:02:06 GMT

Halcyon1234: /* Real-World References */ - Added link to artists' original recording of Gran Val, hosted on Nokia's site.

{{sbenav|167}}
[[Image:The movies.png|thumb|"Good evening, Bontilda. Forty-twone will be on your lest."]]
Strong Bad's annoyance with fellow moviegoers builds to an explosive climax.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}, {{Film|Senor Cardgage}}, {{Film|Pom Pom}}, {{Film|Coach Z}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}, [[The Knight]], [[The Hornblower]], [[The Blacksmith]], {{Film|Homestar Runner}}

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[The Movie Theater]], [[The Field]] (Easter egg)

{{Comp|Lappy 486}}

'''Date:''' Tuesday, February 20, 2007

'''Running Time:''' 3:51

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

==Transcript==
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Coach Z is not that cool; here comes an email.

<blockquote class="lappy email">
<div>subject: movie</div>
Dear Strong Bad, 
 I was at the movies last night and this little girl behind me 
wouldn't shut up! has that ever happened to you? 
Cooper 
Franklin TN.
</blockquote>
''{Strong Bad reads the name and address as "A person called Cooper, from the city of Franklin, in the state of Tennessee."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Told you I could do it.

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{offscreen}'' ''{grudging The Cheat noises}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Oh, I feel ya, Coopreme. It's a good thing they make you turn off your bazookas before movies man, or every one of my theater-going experiences would end in smoldering crater fashion.

''{Cut to a cinema entrance lobby. Posters for Dangeresque 3 and King Bubsgonzola Supreme hang in the background. Senor Cardgage is an usher; Strong Bad, The Cheat, and Pom Pom walk in.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' The experience starts out promising enough...

'''SENOR CARDGAGE:''' Good efening, Bontilda. ''{takes Strong Bad's ticket and tears it}'' Forty-twone will be on your lest.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Just you watch, The Cheat. Some day ''I'm'' gonna be the one tearing tickets and telling folks that forty-twone will be on their lest.

''{Cut inside the cinema. Coach Z is watching the movie screen, fidgeting and thinking hard.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' It begins with the genius who can't resist answering the oh-so-challenging film trivia slides they show before the movie.

'''COACH Z:''' Oh, I know this one! The Brat Pack! Pan-and-scan! Spencer Tracy!

''{Cut to Strong Bad. The Cheat is visible on the right.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Real impressive, Ebert. We've only seen this slide ten times since we all sat down.

'''ANNOUNCER:''' ''{voiceover}'' If you answered "B", you're ready for film school.

''{Cut back to Coach Z}''

'''COACH Z:''' Awr, it was ''{hits himself}'' ice cold refreshment.

''{Cut to the screen, which reads:}''

<blockquote>
<big>MOVIE & REFRESHMENT TRIVIA*</big>
The correct answer was : 
B: Ice Cold Refreshment
*ACTUALLY JUST REFRESHMENT TRIVIA
</blockquote>

'''COACH Z: ''' I should've known.

''{Another slide is shown on the screen, with a picture of a bazooka with six tally marks on it, labeled "Please Be Considerate. Because no one wants to watch a smoldering crater."}''

'''ANNOUNCER:''' Be considerate of others. Please turn off your bazookas before the progrum.

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Then, once the movie starts, don't forget the guy who insists on rattling off the complete filmographies of each of the actors.

''{Cut back to the audience, and pan from Pom Pom to Strong Sad.}''

'''MOVIE:''' ''{voiceover}'' —but when I returned, the DNA evidence was gone!

'''STRONG SAD:''' Ooh, ''{points at screen}'' and he had a cameo as Stevedore #2 in the prequel, and he was in that car commercial with the wisecracking transmission, and he has a Bacon number of 4! ''{holds up four fingers}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{gets up and turns back to face Strong Sad}'' And this is my FIST! ''{raises said fist}'' You might remember it from ''Bloodied Pulp'', the amazingly true story of your face in five seconds! ''{sits back down}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' ''{pointing at Strong Bad}'' He was in Dangeresque 1 and 2!

''{Cut to The Cheat, who is sitting next to Strong Bad and eating popcorn.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And if you think the guy sitting next to you munching popcorn is bad, ''{Strong Bad's head turns slowly in The Cheat's direction}'' try going to a theater where people regularly sneak in their own all-you-can-eat fajitas!

''{Cut to the King of Town, who is holding a frying pan covered in sizzling food, with a stack of similar pans in the seat beside him.}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{Looks at the camera}'' What?! This was all in my box of Milk Duds.

''{Pan back, behind the King of Town, there are the Knight (with a guitar), the Hornblower (with a horn) and the Blacksmith (with maracas). The three of them play a brief Mariachi melody. Cut back to Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And that brings me to the little girl behind me who wouldn't shut up.

''{Pan behind Strong Bad, Homestar Runner is standing there, wearing a viking helmet.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{singing}'' Ever and more! Ever and more! Ever and more!

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' This is the kind of person that likes to talk to the movie. But not in the usual ''{Homestar mouths Strong Bad's words}'' "Don't go in there!" or ''{Homestar mouths Strong Bad's words again}'' "Oh no he di'n't!" type of way. He just... makes small talk with the characters, and chit-chat.

''{Cut through white to some time in the movie. Homestar is sitting on his seat, with the viking helmet on the seat next to him.}''

'''MOVIE:''' ''{voiceover}'' Well, I figured out their plan.

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Yeah, I figured I'd just cut up some iceberg lettuce, throw some tomatoes on there, maybe a little catalina. Nothing fancy, nothing fancy.

''{Cut through white to later in the movie. Homestar is lying on his seat, with his head resting on the helmet.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Oh, man, have you ever been to a ground-breaking? I mean, what is the point of those things?

''{Cut through white again, Homestar is lying upside down on his seat, with his legs in the air.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' You know where the real money is? ''{shakes his legs}'' Phone books.

''{Cut through white yet again, Homestar is sitting up normally.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' I wonder how you spell tabasco. ''{stands up}'' TABASCOooo!

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{Gets up from his seat again and turns around.}'' What is wrong with you people?! Do you not notice the giant movie over here? Were all the local sit-around-and-suck-out-loud places closed?!

''{Strong Bad picks up a bazooka, holds it beside his head like a cell phone, and imitates a ringtone.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, di-a-lo-do, da-a-lo-do, di-a-lo-do, ''die''!!

''{Strong Bad lowers the bazooka to point at the camera and fires it. Fade back to the computer room.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' So, that's why I'm not allowed at the movies anymore. But I don't care. I brought my movie viewing into the digital age. And I dig-it-all!!! Check it out!

''{Strong Bad runs "karatecar.exe". An ASCII art movie starts. A stick figure man walks along a street, with buildings in the background, and a car drives across. The stick figure jumps and does a somersault over the car just before he gets hit.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{quietly}'' Oh, look out, Mister Slashy-Man!

''{The movie cuts to a closeup of the car.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{quietly}'' Ooh, something exciting!

''{The movie cuts to a closeup of the stick figure man, who says "Now THAT was a ''sports'' car!". He then does some karate moves and says "Hi-YA!".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{quietly}'' Aah, I guess I'm talking during the movie! Kind of a hypocrite! Gonna shut up now!

''{[[The Paper]] comes down.}''

==Easter Eggs==
*Click on the "@" at the end to see a film trivia screen.
<blockquote>
<big>MOVIE & REFRESHMENT TRIVIA*</big>
What can you get at the concession 
stand for $10, $10 or $13?
A. Luke Wilson 
B. 16:9 Anamorphic 
C. Hot, Hot Buttery Popcorn 
D. '''Battleship Potemkin'''
*ACTUALLY JUST REFRESHMENT TRIVIA
</blockquote>
*Click on the "Hi-YA" at the end to see Homestar in a smoldering crater sitting in a theater seat with a frame of a movie poster protruding from the side of the crater:
:'''HOMESTAR RUNNER''': Oh man. This movie has it all. Cinema has never Luked so Wilson.

==Fun Facts==

===Explanations===
*[[Wikipedia:Pan and Scan|Pan and Scan]] refers to a technique by which film originally shot in widescreen format is transferred into a format compatible with the shape of common TV screens. In contrast, DVDs made using an [[Wikipedia:Anamorphic widescreen|anamorphic widescreen]] technique automatically fill [[Wikipedia:High-definition television|high-definition television]] screens that have a 16:9 aspect ratio and make full use of the available resolution.
*[[Wikipedia:French dressing|Catalina]] is a type of salad dressing made from tomato ketchup and sugar.
*[[Wikipedia:ASCII art|ASCII art]] is an artistic medium that makes pictures entirely out of typed characters.
*A [[Wikipedia:Groundbreaking|groundbreaking]] is a photo-op ceremony in which executives or other noteworthy people dig the first shovel of dirt from a lot in which a new construction will be built.
*The slashes on the bazooka in the "Be Considerate" ad are a common mark on guns, tanks, and war ships to show how many kills they've made.
*A [[Wikipedia:Stevedore|stevedore]] is a person who works at or is responsible for loading and unloading ships in port.
*[[The Knight]], [[The Hornblower]], and [[The Blacksmith]] are playing instruments as if they were in a [[Wikipedia:Mariachi|mariachi band]].

===Trivia===
*The release date on the Dangeresque 3 poster is:<blockquote>COMING <del>JUNE 2004</del> <del>APRIL 2005</del> <del>MEMORIALS DAY 2005</del> <del>AUGUST 2006</del> WE'LL SEE...</blockquote>
*[[Dangeresque (character)|Dangeresque]]'s [[Cool Shades]] in the poster have three lenses, relating to it being the third film. The number "3" is also visible, reflected in the center lens.

===Remarks===
*Despite the lack of a specific release date and that it just says "We'll see", the poster for Dangeresque 3 is still labeled "Now Playing".
*When watching the [[Wikipedia:ASCII art|ASCII art]] movie, Strong Bad says "Kind of a hypocrite!" because he was talking during it. However, he was ''yelling'' during the actual movie, and that is not mentioned.
*Note that the ASCII art is actually not real ASCII art as some of the characters are of different font sizes.


===Inside References===
*This is the third email in a row that mentions [[DNA Evidence]].
*This email features another pronunciation of the word "program" as [[Progrum|progrum]].
*Two of the movie posters are for ''[[King Bubsgonzola Supreme]]'' (based on [[unnatural]]) and ''[[dangeresque 3|Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective]]'' (with no predetermined release date).
**The King Bubsgonzola Supreme poster was an easter egg in [[unnatural]].
*Strong Bad originally said in [[stunt double]] that Dangeresque 3 would come out in June 2004, hence the first crossed out date. The other three dates are of major releases: [[Stinkoman 20X6]], [[Senorial Day]], and [[Strongest Man in the World]], respectively.
*"Film school" was first mentioned in [[Puppets on the Road]].
*"Hi-YA!" is an example of [[Lowercase i's]].
*Strong Bad's "Told you I could do it," refers to his habit of mangling the [[Strong Bad Email By Name of Sender|emailer's name]] and/or [[Strong Bad Email By Place|address]], which he doesn't do this time.
*The voice heard during the trivia screens and during the first movie clip is the same voice heard narrating the [[SBASAF]] filmstrip.

===Real-World References===
*The first line of Strong Bad's intro song for this email bears a strong resemblance to the chorus of "[[Wikipedia:Billie Jean|Billie Jean]]", by [[Wikipedia:Michael Jackson|Michael Jackson]].
*The [[Wikipedia:Brat Pack (movies)|Brat Pack]] refers to a group of actors that rose to fame in the 1980s by starring in several teen-oriented movies.
*[[Wikipedia:Spencer Tracy|Spencer Tracy]] was a two-time [[Wikipedia:Academy Awards|Academy Award]]-winning film actor.
*Strong Bad's "Ebert" comment refers to [[Wikipedia:Roger Ebert|Roger Ebert]], a Chicago-based movie critic.
*"[[Wikipedia:Bacon number|Bacon number]]" refers to the number of degrees of separation an actor has from actor [[Wikipedia:Kevin Bacon|Kevin Bacon]]. This, in turn, stems from the [[Wikipedia:Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon|Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon]] game that was popular in the early 1990s.
*[[Wikipedia:Milk Duds|Milk Duds]] are a popular candy often sold at movie theaters.
*Tabasco is both [[Wikipedia:Tabasco|a state in Mexico]] as well as the trademark name for a brand of [[Wikipedia:tabasco_sauce|hot pepper sauce]].
*The song Strong Bad "sings" before firing the bazooka is the "[[Wikipedia:Nokia tune|Nokia tune]]," based on a guitar work called "[http://www.nokia.com/BaseProject/Sites/NOKIA_MAIN_18022/CDA/Categories/AboutNokia/Company/InFocus/RingingtheChanges/_Content/_Static_Files/granvals_26s1-180kb.wav Gran Vals]".
*[[IMDB:nm0005561|Luke Wilson]] is an American film actor.
*''[[Wikipedia:The Battleship Potemkin|The Battleship Potemkin]]'' was an influential silent film about the [[Wikipedia:Russian battleship Potemkin|Battleship ''Potemkin'' uprising]].
*The "Ice Cold Refreshment" trivia and red background refer to [[Wikipedia: Coca-Cola|Coca-Cola]] themed games shown before a film to entertain the moviegoers.

==External Links==
{{sbemailextlinks|167|10860}}

{{Strong Bad Email}}

retirement

Halcyon1234 — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 07:38:00 GMT

Halcyon1234: /* Remarks */

{{sbenav|159|cliffhangers|coloring}}
[[Image:sbemail159a.png|thumb|"Perfect! Now I'm out of my anti-depressant."]]
The Lappy-nappers are revealed! Can Strong Bad save his beloved fold-em-up computer?

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|Marshie}}, {{Film|The Sad Kids}}, [[Lappy 486#Female Lappy 486|Female Lappy 486]], [[Tandy 400]], [[Compy 386]], [[The Paper]], {{Film|Homestar Runner}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}, {{film|Marzipan}}, {{film|The Cheat}}, {{film|Strong Sad}}, {{film|Strong Mad}}

'''Places:''' [[Strong Bad's Basement]], [[Bubs' Concession Stand]], [[Computer Room]], [[Carnival Tent]], [[The Field]]

'''Computers:''' [[Tandy 400]], [[Compy 386]], [[Lappy 486]] [[Category:Tandy 400 Emails]] [[Category:Compy 386 Emails]] [[Category:Lappy 486 Emails]]

'''Dates:'''
:''Part A released (as "retirement"; changed to "retirement A" the next day):'' Monday, October 2, 2006
:''Part B released (as "retirement B"):'' Tuesday, October 3, 2006
:''Parts A and B combined released (as "retirement (combined)"):'' Monday, October 9, 2006
:''Name changed to just "retirement":'' Sunday, October 22, 2006

'''Running Time:''' 6:53

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

==Transcript==
''{Open in Strong Bad's computer room, coming in on a worried Strong Bad, while suspenseful music plays.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' My computer's been lappynapped!

''{A record scratches and the screen dims, Marshie comes in from the bottom of the screen.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Hello, Kenneth!

''{Marshie flies across a yellow background.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Hear me roar!

''{Marshie growls for a moment, then opens his mouth wide, the background turns red, sound lines come out of his mouth, and he meows. Cut to a shot of the Sad Kids standing on top of Marshie.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' That's right, kids!

''{Silhouettes of the main characters scroll across the page, with big question marks over them. As he names the sweepstakes, the name appears on the screen.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Play the Fluffy Puff Marshmallows ''My Lappy Got Stole!'' Sweepstakes and win big!

''{As Marshie says "big", he grows a large, fat, white body, and his voice deepens. Cut to a shot of a bicycle. Marshie's voice is back to normal.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' First prize,—

''{A shot of a metal detector}''

'''MARSHIE:''' —second tries,—

''{Marshie, in a car, driving along with mountains in the background}''

'''MARSHIE:''' ''{singing}'' Take a trip to the mountains... ''{these words appear above the mountains, written on a musical staff}''

''{The screen dims and Marshie comes down from the top with a top hat and a cane.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' I'm a song and dance man!

''{Cut to a wooden desk, with a note card on it.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Just email who you think done it on a 3x5 note card,—

''{"it was the HIPPO!" is written on the note card.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' —stick a Fluffy Puff on each corner,—

''{Four marshmallows appear, one stuck on each corner of the card. Cut to Marshie, talking through gritted teeth, in front of a portrait of an older woman.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' —and just walk away, mother...

''{Cut to Strong Bad's basement, looking at the ad on the TV. Marshie is next to a bag of Fluffy Puff Marshmallows.}''

'''MARSHIE:''' Fluffy Puff Marshmallows. Yeah! Still!

''{The words "Yeah! Still!" appear underneath Marshie. Cut to Strong Bad lying on the couch, surrounded by empty chip packets of various descriptions.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' You gotta be kidding me. Man, everybody's trying to make a buck or nine off my heart-drooping loss. 

''{He feels around in the nearest bag of chips, and finds that it's empty.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, perfect. Now I'm out of my antidepressant. Nothing dulls the pain quite like several dozen half-full bags of ''{as he lists the flavorings, symbols for them appear at the top of the screen}'' Italian-herb-chipotle-buffalo-ranch-guacamole-Thai-peanut-style chippety-chomps. I guess I'll slink off to Bubs' and refill my prescription. Slinnnk...

''{Strong Bad somehow slides up and over the armrest of the couch, and off screen. Cut to Strong Bad at Bubs' Concession Stand. Bubs is nowhere to be seen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Bubs! Hello? Can I get a witness? Bubs? ''{looks around the stand, and screams}''

''{Pan to the side of the stand, we see the Lappy's power cord hanging off the roof. Tense music plays.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The Lappy's tail! I'll save you, Lappy-pie... poo... ''{runs back and forth anxiously, making the Homsar walking noise}'' Just keep your pixels on. Strong Bad's got everything under control-alt-delete.

''{Strong Bad picks up a ladder from behind the stand, and climbs up onto the roof.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Who put you up here— Wha?!?

''{The suspenseful music plays, and reveal the Lappy, with the broken Tandy and the shotgunned Compy. The Tandy is suspending a horseshoe magnet from a fishing rod above the Lappy's keyboard.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' It's my crappier and crappiest computers!

''{Both old computers fizz and spark.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Careful, guys, let's not do anything inappropriate with that magnet... I've got a lot of important text files on that 5 meg hard drive... Now just let the Lappy go, and we can all go out for hushpuppies. You guys still like hushpuppies, don't you?

''{Both old computers fizz and spark a lot.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Okay, fine. hushpuppies are out. For some reason I... I thought you guys liked hushpuppies.

''{Both old computers keep fizzing and sparking. The Tandy also churns its floppy disk drive.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Sorry, guys, we're getting nowhere. I don't speak extravagantly broken computer.

''{The Paper comes down, reading "'Sup Strong Bad. I'll help with the translation."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The Paper! You're just in time! Find out what they want!

''{The Paper goes back up, and the Compy "talks" for a bit. The Paper comes back down with "They want to come out of retirement..."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Retirement? They didn't retire, I threw them away. Ask them if they mean they want to come out of ''thrown-awayment''.

''{The Paper comes down again, reading "They're not laughing. They each want to check one last email."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Are they joking? Those guys couldn't check an email with the help of sixty horses dressed up as IT professionals!

''{The Tandy lowers the magnet a little, and the Lappy's screen turns on, showing:}''

<blockquote style="background: #06bfad; padding: 30px; width: 25em; margin: 0; border: none">
<div style="border: 1px solid black">
<p style="border-top: 2px solid white; border-left: 2px solid white; border-bottom: 2px solid #999; border-right: 2px solid #999; background: #CCC; color: black; font-size: 150%; text-align: center; line-height: 125%; margin: 0; padding: 0">
<big>Oh, Child!</big> 
It's the Teal Screen 
of Near Death! (TSoND)
</div></blockquote>

'''STRONG BAD:''' Okay, okay, okay! I'll do my best. If it'll save the orphanage... I mean, my Lappy, I'll do it. Now, let's check emails like it was the deuce double-aught dweice!

''{Both old computers "talk".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' It just means 2002... I... thought it was slick... slick-rick... way to talk...

''{Fade through black to Strong Bad with the Tandy at the email-checking desk. You hear the old typing effect. The Tandy sparks its screen throughout.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Green lines, green, green lines. It's a Strong Bad Email again.

<blockquote class="tandy email">
dearest strong bad 
do you remember the email that you deleted 
the hardest 
sincerly 
josh 
oakland
</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad reads "sincerly" as written, and "josh oakland" as "josho kland"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Well, let's just see here... Zero capitalization...

''{The first letters of each of "dearest", "strong", "bad", "do", "sincerly", "josh" and "oakland" are all briefly highlighted}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Misspelling...

''{The word "sincerly" is briefly highlighted}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Lack of punctuation...

''{The blank spaces after "bad", "hardest", "sincerly" and "josh" are all briefly highlighted}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{with a hint of insincerity}'' Looks like a winner to me! ''{typing}'' Dearest Josho, I have some good news for you! I DO remember the email that I deleted the hardest. And I'm still remembering it right now!!! ''{stops typing}'' Homestar! Little help please.

''{Zooms out to reveal Homestar pouring a bottle of Mountain Dew into the hole in the side of the Tandy}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' I'm way ahead of ya, SB.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Then, we'll just add some of the King of Town's fizzy denture tablets.

''{Strong Bad holds up a box of [[Oh No You Dent! Denture Tablets]].}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' ''{offscreen}'' Thems is my after-dinner mints!

''{Strong Bad tips several of the tablets into the hole.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{heavy reverb}'' And now if you'd please turn in your hymnals, and join me in singing number 119, a-deleted.

''{Strong Bad hits the keyboard, and the "DELETED!!" screen comes up, with a gothic font. Organ music plays.}''

'''STRONG BAD & HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{singing}'' Deleted!

''{Strong Bad swings a pickaxe through the keyboard and the desk. The Tandy explodes, and gives off a bad graphics mushroom cloud.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{turns away, falls to his knees and closes his eyes}'' Aaah!

'''STRONG BAD:''' Goodbye, old girl. They'll always say you went out in a blaze of green rectangular glory.

''{Homestar, with one eye still closed, starts pouring Mountain Dew on the carpet. Cut to a closeup of Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' All right! One down, one to go.

''{Cut to a shot of the shotgunned Compy on the desk. The suspenseful music plays. The screen fades to black.''}

''{Strong Bad is in front of the Compy. Despite the hole, he manages to type "strongbad email.exe".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' There's a big ol' hole inside my email, makin' it hard to cheeeeck...

''{He brings up the email. It is formatted around the hole.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oooh! Automatic hole formatting! ''{starts reading}''

<blockquote class="compy email">
Dear Strong Bad, 
I want to see you perform some amazing 
feats of 
wonder. 
 
Very ser-                     iously, 
Luke S.
</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad says "Double Dear Strong Bad" in place of the first line, and after reading "wonder", he comments "You mean, more amazing than checking an email on this computer?!" In place of the name, he says "Luke South".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Well, I am very serious too. Serious about the most incredible, tantalizing, pants-defying, mind-googling sights in the whole world!! ''{stops typing}'' Lalalalalalaaaa!

''{Cut back to show the whole computer room. A [[Wikipedia:Boater (hat)|boater hat]] falls on his head and a cane into his hand.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Ladies and Luke, I give you...

''{The Computer Room rises, as if it were a theater curtain, revealing a carnival tent.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{as a sideshow caller}'' Strong Bad's Amazing Feats of Wonder! ''{Strong Bad appears in the foreground}'' Gawk and squawk as I walk and talk like an old-timey sideshow caller, and add "Lalalalalaa" to the end of everything I say lalalalalalaaa!

''{Strong Bad ducks down. Cut to inside the tent.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' First, in our gallery of ocular oddities, is a contortionist... with a twist!

''{He moves away, revealing a curtain painted with "MARZiPAN - SHE-TYPE! KA-RAZY?"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Feast your Dust Bowl-ravaged eyes on ''{Curtain lifts, revealing Marzipan with her hair tied up.}'' Marzipan, the Human Woo-man ''{rolls the next "R"}'' Rrrrrotini!

''{A logo for "The Human Woo-man Rotini" appears. Marzipan curls her neck like a spring. The audience makes amazed sounds.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Behold! An ocean of pesto!

''{Green liquid flies in from offscreen and lands on Marzipan.}''

'''MARZIPAN:''' That's not part of my act!

''{Cut to The King of Town, with some of the green liquid dribbling down from his moustache.}''

'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' I know! It's a part of ''mine'' lalalalalalalaaa!

''{He sucks in the liquid. Cut back to Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Now, direct your attention to the Pee Wee Stage...

''{Again, Strong Bad moves aside. Now the curtain shows "THE CHEAT - AND HOW! PART ANVIL?"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...where the flea circus has left town, and the inmates are restless!

''{The audience ooohs as the curtain is lifted, showing a manacled The Cheat.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Gather strong at The Cheat's Flea Prison Riot!

''{As the above words appear, a magnifying glass focuses on The Cheat and zooms in on a tiny prison in his fur, where a number of small black dots are rioting and squabbling. The prison has some flames coming out of the windows, and a siren is heard. Cut back to Strong Bad in front of a curtain reading "Strong Sad - DEE PRESS! DO U DARE?" with an elephant styled to look like Strong Sad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And don't forget Strong Sad's feet of wonder.

''{The audience ahhhs as the curtain is moved up, revealing Strong Sad in a blue dress with a beard. A paper reading "stupid's stupid crap that I hate" appears for a moment. Strong Sad lifts the dress, revealing his feet, as the audience gasps.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' I call them "soolnds".

''{Cut to Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And lastly, so ghastly, the ate-thh wonder of the world!

''{Cut to curtain showing "Strong Mad - ATE THH! NECK?"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' House-mouth!!!

''{The curtain lifts, showing Strong Mad in a loincloth. A "HOUSE-MOUTH" logo appears. The audience gasps.}''

'''STRONG MAD:''' DAAAAH!! ''{Opens his mouth very wide, taking up most of his body and creating the shape of a house. The audience gasps.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{popping in from the side of the screen}'' This land-locked leviathan conveniently subsists only on outdated electronics!

''{He ducks away as the Compy is thrown in Strong Mad's mouth. He closes his mouth. A second later, he jumps a bit as a sparking sound is heard. Strong Mad gulps it down.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{popping in again, and throwing his hat and cane}'' ''We did it!!!'' Lalalalalalalaaaa!

''{The scene again rises like a curtain, revealing the Computer Room. The Lappy is in its place at the desk.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The Lappy! You're back...y! You and I have some unfinished business, little lady!

''{Strong Bad sits down. Cut to the Lappy's screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing; anywhere that a comma would be appropriate, a dull tapping sound is heard}'' There ya go Jake-ula. Now all the cliffhangers have been for reallysolved. Okay Lappy I hope your battery's charged ''{music starts}'' cuz I'm finally taking you out for those hush-puppies you always wanted!!!

''{He picks up the Lappy and walks off. Fade to black. Cut to a silhouette of Strong Bad holding the Lappy and walking across the sunset. Ghostly images of the Tandy and Compy appear over his head. The music suddenly stops with a record scratch.}''

'''FEMALE LAPPY 486:''' But Strong Bad, I'm hate hushpuppies!

'''STRONG BAD:''' Man, I coulda sworn one of you guys liked hushpuppies.

''{The Paper comes down, reading "It was me. I like hushpuppies." The music starts again. It eventually stops again with a record scratch.}''

'''FEMALE LAPPY 486:''' Can we please find my toe?

''{Strong Bad stops walking and looks up toward the ghostly images, which speed away upwards.}''

==Easter Eggs==
* Click on Strong Bad's diamond when he says he's got a lot of important text files on Lappy's harddrive to see a selection of those files.
<table>
<tr valign="top"><td>
<blockquote style="font-family: monospace">
    clncknmsfrmyslf.txt 
Cool nicknames for myself 
-------------------------- 
Mr. Lewd Comment 1965 
Giantus 
The Fake Frenchman 
<del style="color:red">Light 'n Fluffy</del> NO! 
Heaven in Tights 
Good Fortunator 
Bicep Lad 
Lebner 
Mighty Legit 
Dabney Coleman's Evil Twin 
Wisewallace 
/got nothin' 
The Detroit Locksmith 
Prudeacre
</blockquote>
</td><td>
<blockquote style="font-family: monospace">
      cldshplog.txt 
 Cloud Shape Spotting Log 
------------------------- 
lightswitch w/no cover 
baseball headed baby 
brown water 
michigan w/2 bites out of it 
smallish elbow 
box of crackers (unopened) 
pestilence 
2 salamanders giving low-5's 
oversized novelty comb 
cheap date 
strong sad's ghost 
uppity maitre d 
strong sad's corpse 
diet pills
</blockquote>
</td></tr><tr><td>
<blockquote style="font-family: monospace">
    ltr2bkrythrftstr.txt 
Letter to Bakery Thrift Store 
------------------------- 
Dear Bakery Thrift Store, 
Whom do you think you are 
fooling? You sell old baked 
goods. The stuff regular 
bakeries throw away. So what 
if a loaf of bread is only 
29 cents? It's old bread. 
Should I start collecting 
roadkill squirrels, glue 
cotton balls to their butts 
and open an 'Aftermarket 
Rabbit Thrift Store?' Oh, 
wait. Yes I should. Thank You 
Bakery Thrift Store. Love, SB
</blockquote>
</td><td valign="bottom">[[Image:Dullard sbemail159a.png|thumb|Horses in IT?]]</td></tr>
</table>

* Click on the roof vent after Strong Bad's joke about Horses in [[Wikipedia:Information technology|IT]] (that is, after the Teal Screen of Near Death appears) to see a [[Dullard]] comic.
* Click the electrical socket after the Tandy's explosion to replay the explosion animation.
* Click on the Compy's contrast dial when Strong Bad checks the second email to see some sparks fly.
*When Strong Bad says "Luke South", click on the Compy's exposed gear to see a southward traffic sign.
*At the end, before the old computers fly away, click their contrast knobs for the [[Bad Graphics Ghost]] and a dancing skeleton on the Tandy and Compy, respectively.
*After the spectral computers fly away, click on the Lappy to see an extra scene involving the King of Town.
:''{A curtain is seen with a [[Ham|ham]] with the King of Town's head on it reading "The King of Town - ONE DER! MEAT MAN?"}''
:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' He's half-man, half-cholesterol! Can I get a "ooh-ahh" for Clogdor!
:''{The curtain lifts, revealing the King behind a counter with a frying pan on it. The [[Grabbo Arm]] is holding up a toothpick above the frying pan. "CLOGDOR!!" is written across the top of the screen.}''
:'''AUDIENCE MEMBERS:''' Ewww! Euugh!
:''{The King of Town burps, producing an oddly-colored bubble. As it floats toward the frying pan, the Grabbo Arm juts forward, popping the bubble and creating the innards of an [[Eggs|egg]], which falls into the frying pan. The audience gasps.}''
:'''THE KING OF TOWN:''' If ya think my burps are impressive, wait'll you see my—
:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{Cutting in in front of the scene}'' —seen enough of that one lalalalalalalaaaaa!

==Fun Facts==
===Changes Between the Two-Part and One-Part Versions===
This email was originally released as a two-parter, and was re-released a week later as a single email called "retirement (combined)". (On October 22, the email was renamed just "retirement".) The following were added or changed from the original:
* The Lappy's comma key is now missing throughout the toon. Originally, the key was present in part A when the Compy and Tandy are holding the Lappy hostage but was missing in part B when Strong Bad gets it back.
* The Tandy's screen now intermittently flashes with static while Strong Bad is checking its email.
* Part A ended with the zoom-in on the Compy 386 (as the suspenseful music played). The Paper came down with a message that read, "To Be Continued Tomorrow!". Part B picked up with Strong Bad sitting at the Compy. When the two parts were combined, The Paper was removed, and a transition in and out of black now splices the two halves.
* Also removed were the "back" link at the end of part A and the "loading" screen at the beginning of part B. This is notable because even though the "back" link was on the Compy, it was written in the Lappy's font, and the "loading" screen on part B was written in the Compy's font.
* Clicking on the Compy's contrast dial creates some sparking effects.
* A gear in the Compy now turns as Strong Bad types.
* An extra scene featuring Strong Sad in Strong Bad's carnival tent was added.
* When Strong Bad attempts to type commas in his closing remarks, commas no longer appear and instead a dull tapping sound is heard.
* An Easter egg featuring the King of Town's act in Strong Bad's carnival tent was added.

===Explanations===
*The explosion following the addition of Mountain Dew and denture tablets to the Tandy 400 is due to the rapid release of carbon dioxide gas from both the carbonated water and the effervescent action of the sodium bicarbonate and citric acid in the tablets, not to be confused with the [[Wikipedia:Mentos eruption|Coke and Mentos]] phenomenon.
*[[Wikipedia:Control-Alt-Delete|Control-Alt-Delete]] is a computer keyboard command on [[Wikipedia:IBM PC compatible|IBM PC compatible]] systems that can be used to close programs or reboot the computer.
*A [[Wikipedia:Hushpuppy|hushpuppy]] is a deep-fried ball of cornmeal commonly eaten in the southern United States.
*Putting a magnet too close to a computer can damage the data stored on [[Wikipedia:Magnetic storage|magnetic storage]], such as [[Wikipedia:Hard disk|hard disks]].
*Structures or people are called the [[Wikipedia:Eighth Wonder of the World|Eighth Wonder of the World]] in order to liken their perceived greatness to the [[Wikipedia:Seven Wonders of the World|Seven Wonders of the Ancient World]].
*[[Wikipedia:Leviathan|Leviathan]] is the name of a sea-monster (perhaps a crocodile) mentioned several times in the [[Wikipedia:Old Testament|Old Testament]]. The word "leviathan" is often used to refer to any large monster or creature.
*[[Wikipedia:Pesto|Pesto]] is an Italian sauce frequently served over pasta. While many variations exist, in its classic form it is made of basil, pine nuts, extra virgin olive oil and pecorino romano cheese.
* Strong Sad is dressed as a [[Wikipedia:Bearded Lady|Bearded Lady]].

===Trivia===
*This email and [[flashback]] are tied for the most Easter eggs in any email to date, with eight. They're second on the site total, tied with [[Halloween Fairstival]] and [[Halloween Potion-ma-jig]]. The toon with the most Easter eggs is [[3 Times Halloween Funjob]] with ten.
* At 6:53, this is the longest toon on the site. It beats the previous longest email, [[alternate universe]], by nearly one minute, and the previous longest toon, [[Where's The Cheat?]], by 35 seconds.
*The [[Hanging Objects|portrait]] of Marshie's mother is hung in the same frame as the painting by the Deutsch Master in [[portrait]].
*For the first email, the floppy disk container reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#mastertype|mastertype]]". For the second, it reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#silpheed|silpheed]]".
*This is the first Strong Bad Email to feature all three computers.
*This is the first time [[Soolnds|soolnds]] are mentioned out loud.

===Remarks===
[[Image:extra outlet and Lappy plug.png|thumb|120px|The Lappy's tail!]]
*In Marshie's Whodunnit? scene, every main character is visible silhouetted except for [[The Cheat]], [[The Poopsmith]], [[Homsar]] and [[Strong Bad]] himself.
*Strong Bad says that the Lappy's hard drive holds five "[[Wikipedia:Megabyte|megs]]". However, in [[animal]], the Lappy has a "2 MB Hard Drive!".
*During Strong Bad's confrontation with the Tandy and Compy, there are clickable areas on the Lappy's screen, but clicking on them has no effect. This is because the Tandy's contrast buttons are behind the Lappy, and they are disabled in this scene.
*The word "contrast" on Strong Bad's Tandy is in a different font than it was before the Tandy was thrown out. This change was also made for the redone Tandy-era e-mails in [[do over]].
*If you view the Flash file, during the [[Mountain Dew|Mountain Dew]] scene there is an extra electrical outlet outside the black, complete with the Lappy's cord plugged in.
*The three sounds that play on the Tandy when Strong Bad highlights portions of the email come from [[Wikipedia:MacOS|MacOS]]: "Purr", "Sosumi", and "Temple", respectively.
*This is the first time an email has been [[DELETED|deleted]] in the Lappy era (even though it was not deleted on the Lappy itself).
*Strong Bad claims that he is out of potato chips, but some of the bags are partially filled.
*The Tandy and Compy were sold by Bubs to the King of Town ([[King of Town Email]]) and Homestar ([[Broken Compy Menu]]), respectively. Oddly, both denied kidnapping the Lappy in [[cliffhangers]] (Homestar) and [[Missing Lappy]] (King of Town).

[[Image:End 159.PNG|thumb|Slightly less shotgunned]]
*The hole in the Compy is smaller here than it was at the end of [[virus]], making it possible to fit a token amount of legible text onto the screen.
*In the start of the second part, the Compy starts off in "automatic hole format" but when Strong Bad starts typing his reply, some of the written text does not appear on the Compy's screen.
*Strong Mad appears to have no tongue or tonsils.
*Apparently, the cog inside the Compy processes text, yet it was shown spinning while broken at the end of [[virus]].
*The sounds of the fleas on The Cheat sound a lot like The King of Town and Strong Bad's voices sped up when they are saying "Lalalalalala".
*The Paper doesn't have a link to Strong Bad's email address.
*[[The Virus|The viruses]] in the Compy, which affected the outside world in [[virus]], do not return for this email. It seems a shotgun is an effective virus-cleaner.
*The email checked with the Tandy uses the animation style that was used in emails prior to [[brianrietta]], where Strong Bad's mouth moves as opposed to his head.
**The sound effect of the keyboard is also the same as that used in those emails.
*Neither the plug socket or the Compy's cord appear during the Compy email.

===Goofs===
*When the camera zooms in on the box of the King of Town's fizzy denture tablets, the green lines on the Tandy aren't moving.
*Right after Strong Bad deletes the Tandy email, and is about to swing the pickaxe into the keyboard, for a split second, you can hear Homestar saying "deleted", but his mouth doesn't appear to move.
*There is no electrical outlet under the table while Strong Bad is using the Compy.
*While zoomed in on the Compy, Strong Bad's reflection appears over some of the cracks in the Compy's screen.

===Inside References===
*This email follows directly from [[cliffhangers]], where Strong Bad's computer was kidnapped at the end of the email. The dramatic "cliffhanger resolution" music is reused from that email as well. Strong Bad's closing remarks are directed toward Jake, who sent the email featured in cliffhangers.
*This is another appearance of [[Index Cards|index cards]] on the site.
*The phrase "Slink off to Bubs'" is a reference to the spamvertisement Easter egg at the end of [[unused emails]], which stated, "Slink on over to Bubs' Concession Stand..."
*"Now, let's check emails like it was the deuce double-aught dweice!" most likely refers to the fact that in 2002 Strong Bad last checked an email with the Tandy and first checked an email with the Compy.
*The position of Strong Bad's head in front of the Tandy, his reflected mouth on the Tandy's screen, and his lack of head movement are references to his early emails.
*"Number 119, a-deleted" may be a reference to Email #119 ([[animal]]) in which Strong Bad first got the Lappy.
*Two of the items on Strong Bad's Cloud Shape Spotting Log ("strong sad's ghost" and "strong sad's corpse") refer to [[Death#Strong Sad|Strong Sad's imagined death]].
*Homestar pouring [[Mountain Dew]] into the Tandy is a reference to [[anything]], in which he poured Mountain Dew onto the Compy.
*Strong Bad makes Homsar's walking noise and skitters around like him when he notices the Lappy's cord and is frantically pacing around.
*The Cheat was previously compared with an anvil in [[huttah!]].
*The skeleton image on the Compy's computer is from [[Peasant's Quest]].
*Marzipan's curtain contains another case of [[Lowercase i's]].
*The picture on Strong Mad's curtain resembles the [[Strong Man]]. Interestingly, although the figure in the picture is wearing the Strong Man's outfit, Strong Mad's costume consists of only a loincloth.
*The word "[[Soolnds|soolnds]]", the name that Strong Sad has given his feet, was previously used in [[Strong Sad's Lament]].
*The King of Town's stage name "Clogdor" is written in the same [[Fonts|font]] as [[Trogdor]]'s name on the official T-shirts. (And obviously "Clogdor" is a play on words of "Trogdor".)

===Real-World References===
*When Strong Bad is on the couch, there is a brand of chips called "Flavoured Triangles". This could be a reference to [[Wikipedia:Doritos|Doritos]] or other tortilla corn chips which are triangle-shaped.
*The winged buffalo references the [[Wikipedia:Buffalo Wild Wings|Buffalo Wild Wings]] mascot.
*The [[Wikipedia:Teal (color)|Teal]] Screen of Near Death is a reference to the various colored [[Wikipedia:Category:Screens of death|Screens of death]] used by computer operating systems to indicate serious system errors. The [[Compy 386]] has been seen to have its own [[Wikipedia:Blue Screen of Death|Blue Screen of Death]] (the [[Strong Bad's Computer Malfunctioning|Flagrant System Error]]) on more than one occasion.
*[[Wikipedia:Dabney Coleman|Dabney Coleman]] is an actor most known for his role in the films ''[[Wikipedia:Nine to Five|Nine to Five]]'' and ''[[Wikipedia:Tootsie|Tootsie]]''.
*Strong Bad scrambling back and forth underneath the Lappy's cord may be a reference to [[Wikipedia:Donkey Kong 3|Donkey Kong 3]], while the music is reminiscent of the game [[Wikipedia:Super Mario Bros. 2|Super Mario Bros. 2]], when the player is fighting a boss.
*[[Wikipedia:Slick Rick|Slick Rick]] was a popular hip-hop artist of the late 1980's and early 1990's.
*"/got nothin'" in the text files is a reference to [[Wikipedia:Fark.com|Fark.com]], where people often end their posts with that remark.
*Homestar pouring Mountain Dew onto the carpet after the destruction of the Tandy may be a reference to the practice of pouring [[Wikipedia:libation|libations]] on the ground to honor the dead. In Strong Bad's case, it can also be used to honor those [[video games|sent up the river]].
*"If it'll save the orphanage..." is most likely a reference to ''[[Wikipedia:The Blues Brothers|The Blues Brothers]]'', in which the brothers put their old band back together in order to save the orphanage in which they were raised.
*Strong Bad's contracted naming of files refers to names often given to files due to [[Wikipedia:8.3|8.3]] naming restrictions present in older [[Wikipedia:File Allocation Table|FAT]] filesystems, although his file names would be too long for these rules.
*"Just walk away, mother" is a reference to the movie ''[[Wikipedia: Psycho (1960 film)|Psycho]]''. Also, the painting seen when Marshie delivers this line is drawn similarly to the caricature of [[Wikipedia:Alfred Hitchcock|Alfred Hitchcock]] seen at the start of his television program, ''[[Wikipedia:Alfred Hitchcock Presents|Alfred Hitchcock Presents]]''.
*The [[Wikipedia:Dust Bowl|Dust Bowl]] was a series of dust storms caused by poor farming techniques that ravaged the central United States and Canada from 1934 to 1939. Hundreds of thousands of people were displaced.
*The graphics for the Fluffy Puff Marshmallows My Lappy Got Stole! Sweepstakes resemble those used for the 1995 [[Wikipedia:Simpsons|Simpsons]] episode [[Wikipedia:Who Shot Mr. Burns?|Who Shot Mr. Burns?]] contest sponsored by 1-800-COLLECT. That contest also featured silhouettes of the main characters with big question marks over each one, while a voiceover told viewers where to send in their guesses of the guilty party's identity in order to win the grand prize (being animated into an upcoming episode).
*The "horses in IT" joke could be a reference to the British comedy series [[Wikipedia:Little Britain|Little Britain]], which contained a sketch set in a computer shop featuring a [[Wikipedia:horse whisperer|horse whisperer]] asking a horse how to fix a problem with installing Windows XP.



==External Links==
{{sbemailextlinks|159|9999}}
*[[Mirror:sbemail159a.html|watch "retirement A"]] (mirror)
*[[Mirror:sbemail159a.swf|view the Flash file for "retirement A"]] (mirror)
*[[Mirror:sbemail159b.html|watch "retirement B"]] (mirror)
*[[Mirror:sbemail159b.swf|view the Flash file for "retirement B"]] (mirror)

{{Strong Bad Email}}

cliffhangers

Halcyon1234 — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 07:12:11 GMT

Halcyon1234: /* Real-World References */

{{sbenav|158|trading cards|retirement}}
[[Image:sbemail158.png|thumb|"This dinner party is top dollar!"]]
Strong Bad resolves three cliffhangers, and is then confronted by "sweet lady irony".

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|Homsar}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}, {{Film|Coach Z}}, {{Film|Bubs}}/The [[Thnikkaman]], {{Film|The Cheat}}, {{Film|Strong Mad}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}}, {{Film|Homestar Runner}}

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[Cliffs|A Cliff]], [[Coach Z's Locker Room]], Inside [[The Proud Anselmo]], [[Strong Sad's Room]], [[Bubs' Concession Stand]] (Easter egg), [[The Office]] (Easter egg)

{{Comp|Lappy 486}}

'''Date:''' Monday, September 18, 2006

'''Running Time:''' 3:22

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

== Transcript ==
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Oooh, it's a e-email, money, money, money. Oooh-ooh. Shut up. ''{brings up email}''
<blockquote class="lappy email">
<div>subject: cliffhangers</div>
Dear Strong Bad, 
Resolve all the cliffhangers please. 
 
Thanks, 
Jake
</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad reads "Jake" as "Little Jakey Pleasenthanks".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Hmmmmm. The cliffhangers, eh? I never really thought to call them that, but I guess that ''is'' what they are. Yeah, Why not? ''{gets up, accompanied by The Geddup Noise}''

''{Cut to a face of a cliff. Homsar and the King of Town are both hanging from separate ropes, which are attached to the top of the cliff.}''

'''HOMSAR:''' This dinner party is top dollar!

''{As he says this, Homsar's hat floats around him in a perfect circle. Strong Bad is seen walking up to the edge of the cliff. Zoom in on him.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Alright, cliffhangers. Prepare to be resolved!

''{Strong Bad takes out a big knife and slices both the ropes, causing the King of Town and Homsar to fall out of the shot.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, and I brought you some snacks.

''{Strong Bad tosses some paper bags labeled "Hom" and "Kot" down the cliff.}''

'''KING OF TOWN:''' ''{echoing}'' You're a good friend, Strong Bad!

''{Strong Bad leaves. Cut back to Strong Bad's computer room. Strong Bad sits back down, and the screen has already been cleared.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Alright, alright. I know what you really mean, Jakesy. So, you say you want a resolution, huh?

''{Static away to the words "Cliffhanger #1" on a dark grey screen. Then, cut to the Locker Room. The Thnikkaman is crammed into a locker, bound with ropes. Coach Z is facing him.}''

'''COACH Z:''' And now, Thnikkaman, at long last, the world will discover your secret, sorcret identity!

''{Cut to a closeup of Coach Z's face.}''

'''COACH Z:''' Thereby rendering you useless as a Thnikkaman!

''{Cut back to the original view of the locker room.}''

'''THNIKKAMAN:''' I'll render you ''toothless''!

'''COACH Z:''' Now, give me them cool shades!

''{Coach Z swipes at the Thnikkaman's "cool shades". Just as he's about to take them off, the frame freezes. Coach Z's arm is blurred. Zoom in, and the "dun, dun, duuun" sound effect is heard. The screen fades, and "Resolution" appears over the top in yellow text. This goes away, and we return to the scene—Coach Z misses the glasses and falls on his face.}''

'''THNIKKAMAN:''' Yeah, shut up, Coach.

''{The Thnikkaman jumps out of the locker on top of Coach Z, and walks off the left of screen. The usual singers chime in, the words flying across the screen.}''

'''SINGERS:''' You missed unmasking the Thnikkaman!!! ''{slight pause}'' Because you have really bad hand-eye coordination!!!

'''COACH Z:''' Enough already, I get it! My secret sorcret has been revereled.

''{The words "Cliffhanger #2" appear. Cut to Strong Bad in his Space Captainface outfit inside a cardboard spaceship, talking on a cardboard cell phone, with a little paper umbrella as an antenna.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah I ''know'', Lita Ford... but I'm in orbit, baby! Look, I'll call you back when I'm not—

''{Cut to The Cheat, dressed as Strap, who plays an alarm sound effect on the CD player, and turns a lamp with a red bulb on and off.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Strap! Collision alarm! Bring it up on screen!

''{Strong Mad takes away the piece of cardboard representing the screen, revealing a circular silhouette hanging from a piece of string, and holds up a sign reading "Malmsteen's Comet".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' We're on a collision course with Malmsteen's Comet! Full power to the forward humbuckers!

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{anxious The Cheat noises}''

''{The Cheat points to a screen drawn on the cardboard that reads "The forward humbuckers have never worked!".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Humbuckers are offline? Then strap in, Strap, and prepare for ramming speed! If this is the end, then we can at least make it awesome for the people in...

''{Strong Bad looks out a side window labeled "the view" at a desktop globe of the Earth.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...Greenland.

''{The Cheat plays a rockets firing sound on the CD player, and the ship starts shaking.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oooohhhh... Shooooooo....

''{Everything freezes, and the same "dun, dun, duuun" sound effect plays.}''

'''ANNOUNCER:''' Will Cap and Strap make it out of this one?

''{Cut to the silhouetted comet, with a question mark overlaid, Strong Mad holds up a sign reading "Tune in NEXTime...".}''

'''ANNOUNCER:''' Tune in next—

'''STRONG BAD:''' Nope, none of that, just get to resolving.

'''ANNOUNCER:''' Okay!

''{Up comes the "Resolution" screen, then cut to Strong Bad and The Cheat holding on to each other as the ship shakes around them.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' This is it, Strap!

''{The shaking stops, the rocket sound dies away, and the "comet" comes out of the silhouette, revealing it to actually be a moldy cantaloupe, with the label "grodalated cantaloupe".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Wait a minute... that's no comet! We've wandered into the Forgotten Produce belt of Tablature 5!

''{The cantaloupe is joined by a bunch of overripe bananas and an overripe avocado.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' It's guacamole and banana bread time, Strap!

''{Some upbeat music plays, and Strong Bad and The Cheat dance to it.}''

''{The words "Cliffhanger #3" appear. Strong Sad and Homestar are standing around a table.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' Look, you can tell me.

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' I can't!

'''STRONG SAD:''' Oh, come on, what is it?

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' I'm... pregnant!

''{Slow zoom in on Homestar, and the same "dun, dun, duuun" sound is heard. Up comes the "Resolution" screen.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' No... no, you're Homestar. Runner. ''The male''.

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Oohhhh, phew. Thought I was a pregnant woman for a second there.

'''STRONG SAD:''' Yeah... uh... I think I'd like my money back now.

''{Cut through static to Strong Bad walking back to the computer desk.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And there you go, Jakenstein. All the cliffhangers have been re— Aah!

''{The Lappy isn't on the desk; it has been replaced by a ransom note, which reads "i got your Lappy", and has a red-splattered comma key from the keyboard.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' My computer's been Lappy-napped! And they cut off her little toe! ''{falls to his knees}'' Oh, sweet lady irony! ''Why'' do you mock ''me?''

''{The "dun, dun, duuun" sound is heard. [[The Paper]] comes down, reading "Tune in next time for the cliff hanging conclusion!!"}''

== Easter Eggs ==
*Click on Jake to see a book called "[[Little Jakey Pleasenthanks]]" by [[Leomard Sportsinterviews|Crazy Prof. Sportsinterviews]].

*Click on the electrical outlet at the end to see a scene with Coach Z and Bubs at the concession stand:
:'''COACH Z:''' Nah, I bet if you take away them cool shades and rip that "TH" ''{pronounced as the "th" in "three"}'' off his chest, underneath, you'd find a thin green man with a big ol' "Z" hanging from his—
:'''BUBS:''' ''{glares at Coach Z}'' Coach, are you accusing ''yourself'' of being the Thnikkaman?!
:'''COACH Z:''' Yeah, I, uh— no! I, wuh, da, rumble-dumble sports team?!
*Click on the ransom note at the end to see an extra scene in the office with Homestar and Strong Bad.
:'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Yeah, yeah, you know who I think done it? Homestar Runner. Think about it, think about it. He's got the history, he's got the motive...
:'''STRONG BAD:''' Homestar, are you admitting that ''you'' stole my computer?
:'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' What? No! I was just making watercooler conversation, trying to sound up with the times, uh, um, sports team? ''{Strong Bad looks down, dejected}''


== Fun Facts ==

=== Explanations ===
*An actual [[Wikipedia:Cliffhanger|cliffhanger]] is a plot device used at the end of a movie or TV show where the story comes to an abrupt end without resolving some key issues, so that if the viewer wants to know how the story ends, they will have to tune in to the next episode, or watch the next movie. The term comes from old movie serials which often ended with the heroes in imminent danger, including literally plummeting over or dangling over a cliff, urging the audience to return the next week to see how they make it out alive.
*A [[Wikipedia:Humbucker|humbucker]] is a type of guitar pick-up that uses two coils.
*[[Wikipedia:Tablature|Tablature]] is a specialized type of sheet music for stringed instruments, such as guitar.
* Homestar's line, "I'm [[Pregnancy|pregnant]]", with a close up is a spoof of stereotypical [[Wikipedia:Soap Opera|soap operas]] in which an episode would end with such a cliffhanger.

=== Trivia ===
*This email was sent by wiki user [[User:Cessna Man!|Cessna Man!]].
*The floppy disk container reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#cake walk|cake walk]]".
*Below "the view" in the cardboard spaceship, there is a switch. Both positions of the switch are labeled "off".
*Homestar's and Strong Bad's shirts in the Easter egg read "Just Disks" and "Data Boys" respectively.
*When Strong Bad tosses the lunch bags, Homsar's says "Hom" and the King of Town's says "Kot".

=== Remarks ===
*The Thnikkaman already took his shades off in [[monument]] without his secret identity being revealed.
*In the final scene, the comma key is perfectly flat, as though it's part of the paper.

=== Goofs ===
* Strong Bad unnecessarily capitalized "Why" in "Yeah, Why not?"

=== Glitches ===
[[Image:Cliffhangergoof.png|thumb|125px|Strap in, Strap!]]
*During most of the cardboard spaceship scene, the green ground is slightly cut off on the left side of the screen, so that a strip of white is visible along the black edge of the frame.
*During Cliffhanger #3, when the camera zooms in on Homestar, if you look closely you can see part of his head protruding past his shirt on his left (your right) side.

=== Inside References ===
*Strong Bad first appeared as [[Space Captainface]] in [[space program]].
*When The Thnikkaman waddles away, he makes Homsar's [[Sound Effects|walking noise]].
*The sticker on the cantaloupe says "grodalated", a [[Portmanteaus|portmanteau]] that first appeared in [[bedtime story]].
*This email marks another spoken reference to "[[Cool Shades]]."
*Strong Bad wields a [[Big Knives|Big Knife]] in this email.
*A cantaloupe also appears as [[Doreauxgard]] in [[lackey]].
*Strong Sad's stressing of Homestar's first and last name separately is similar to Homestar's introduction in his [[Homestar Runner#Character Video Transcript|character video]].
*This is the second time Strong Bad has anthropomorphized an abstract concept as a "sweet lady", the first being "sweet lady freedom" in [[Strong Bad is in Jail Cartoon]].
*The announcer in the Space Captainface cliffhanger was first heard in the email [[fingers]].
*Strong Bad and Homestar are wearing the free polo shirts they got from various software companies, as they did in [[other days]].
*The globe outside the cardboard box is from the e-mail [[pizzaz]] and possibly [[Experimental Film]].

=== Real-World References ===
* Malmsteen's Comet is a reference to Swedish guitar player [[Wikipedia:Yngwie J. Malmsteen|Yngwie Malmsteen]] and [[Wikipedia:Ace Frehley|Ace Frehley]], lead guitarist for [[Wikipedia:Kiss (musical group)|Kiss]], and his solo album ''Frehley's Comet''.
*The bloody comma key on the ransom note that Strong Bad calls a "little toe" refers to the movie ''[[The Big Lebowski]]'', in which a ransom note appears for a kidnapped woman along with a severed little toe.
* The cover of Little Jakey Pleasenthanks (by Crazy Prof. Sportsinterviews) is drawn in the style of [[Wikipedia:Dr. Seuss|Dr. Seuss]].
*"So you say you want a resolution, huh?" is a reference to the famous opening line "You say you want a revolution" from the song "[[Wikipedia:Revolution (song)|Revolution]]" by [[The Beatles]].
* The left-hand "screen" picture in the cardboard spaceship and center "eye" when Space Captainface is on screen are from ''[[Wikipedia:2001: A Space Odyssey (film)|2001: A Space Odyssey]]''.
* The right-hand "screen" picture in the cardboard spaceship is a picture of a Thrynn from ''[[Wikipedia:Starflight|Starflight]]'', a 1986 [[Wikipedia:Electronic Arts|Electronic Arts]] computer game.
* [[Wikipedia:Lita Ford|Lita Ford]] is a female glam metal rocker who became popular in the '80s.
* The Announcer in the second cliffhanger, also heard in [[fingers]] and [[alternate universe]], is a reference to the original ''[[Batman]]'' [[Wikipedia:Batman (TV series)|TV series]].
* [[Wikipedia:Greenland|Greenland]] is a very large and sparsely populated island in northern North America, almost completely covered in ice. It is officially a dependent territory of [[Wikipedia:Denmark|Denmark]], but also has an autonomous government.
* The ending of the space cliffhanger—a quick joke followed by the characters dancing to disco music—is reminiscent of the '60s and '70s skit show [[Wikipedia:Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In|Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In]], where gogo dancers would end various sketches. It's also notable, because in the appeal for the Strong Badian space program, he specifically asked for 1960s type girls to cheer on the mission.
* Guacamole and banana bread time is a reference to the popular internet meme [[Wikipedia:Peanut Butter Jelly Time|Peanut Butter Jelly Time]]. This can also refer to the fact that Guacamole and banana bread are uses for over-ripe avocados and bananas (respectively). The avocado's skin was dark green (almost black), and the edges of its flesh were browning, both signs of being over-ripe. In addition, the bananas were extremely bruised, also signs of over-ripeness. Thematically, they fit in with the over-ripe, near-rotted cantaloupe that was the planet.
* "Prepare for ramming speed!" is an oft-used, nearly cliche order given in naval and science fiction stories (such as that said by [[Wikipedia:Worf|Commander Worf]] in the opening scene of [[Wikipedia:Star Trek: First Contact|Star Trek: First Contact]]). The usefulness (or uselessness) of it was addressed in [http://schlockmercenary.com/d/20051220.html Schlock Mercenary].

===Fast Forward===
*The kidnap caper continued the following 2 weeks in [[Missing Lappy]] and [[retirement]].
*The suspenseful music would also be used in [[retirement]].
**Part of it would be used in [[looking old]].

== External Links ==
{{sbemailextlinks|158|9843}}
{{Strong Bad Email}}