Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective Responses (Brainblow City)

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Brainblow City: a town as hard as steel and twice as gray.

Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People has many responses when you talk to various characters and interact with various objects. These are the responses from Brainblow City in Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective.

On these pages, A → B (right arrow) means that the response happens when object A is used on thing B, or in the case of talking to other characters, the indicated sequence of chat topic icons are chosen.

A short horizontal line between two or more responses, such as the one above, means only one of the responses is heard at a time, and that the action results in a different response each time it occurs.


[edit] Brainblow City Set

[edit] On first arrival

DANGERESQUE: {The camera pans away from one of the City Limits signs.} Brainblow City... {The camera view changes to Dangeresque and Renaldo approaching the "city" - rather, the brick wall with a tall painted cardboard stand behind it.} ...a town as hard as steel and twice as gray. She is like a fine lady type... treat her right and she'll make you cupcakes shaped like Cold Ones, but treat her wrong and she'll kick you in the knees, step on your face with a stiletto heel, take your wallet and totally ruin your credit score.
RENALDO: {reluctantly} Yeeaah... your woman scares me. I'll just wait here by the wall where it's safe. You go on ahead!

[edit] After the helicopter jump

{The scene re-materializes at the Brainblow City set. Homestar can be seen operating the camera and walking off, with Strong Bad standing behind him. Jump cut to Dangeresque jumping down from the Brick Wall, followed by another jump cut transitioning to his line.}

DANGERESQUE: Another perfect landing out of a helicopter! Now I just need to find... {speaks slowly} ...some way to get to the Sun! Hmmm...

[edit] In extended play

ON-SCREEN CAPTION: Set Tours: Brainblow City
STRONG BAD: Here we are on the set of Brainblow City, the seedy underworld in which Dangeresque 3 takes place. {Looks at the city backdrop} Our modelers spend many halves of hours creating the sets that bring the city to life! Let's take a look around!

[edit] Brainblow City

In extended play only
STRONG BAD: This is one of the many matte paintings we used to make the Dangeresque 3 sets seem bigger than they actually are. {Turns to the camera} This one was actually painted by a guy named Matt!

[edit] Renaldo

[edit] Nunchuck Gun → Renaldo

DANGERESQUE: Now is not the time for violence! ...Just kidding, any time is a good time for violence, but I have more important things to do right now.

[edit] Renaldo → Baron Darin Diamonocle

Before speaking with the Baron

DANGERESQUE: You really think it's a good idea for me to visit Baron Darin Diamonocle? I'm the guy that put him there in the first place!
RENALDO: You don't have a choice. Just watch your back. I heard that on his first day there he walked right up and punched the biggest, meanest lunch lady right in the shower cap!

After speaking with the Baron

DANGERESQUE: Well, it looks like we don't have to worry about Baron Darin Diamonocle for a long, long time.
RENALDO: What'd you do, break his legs? Kick his teeth in? Petition the court system to extend his sentence an additional four years?
DANGERESQUE: Let's just say, he won't be attending that hat convention in July.
RENALDO: I don't get it.
DANGERESQUE: Neither do I, Renaldo. Neither do I.

[edit] Renaldo → Cutesy Buttons

DANGERESQUE: Cutesy Buttons better be ready to fork over several sacks of cash for rescuing her and getting her rainforest formula!
COACH Z: {infatuated} I'd just be happy to get a hug from Marzipan.
STRONG BAD: {annoyed, breaking character} What?
COACH Z: {distressed} What?! I said nothing!

DANGERESQUE: Cutesy Buttons better be ready to fork over several sacks of cash for rescuing her and getting her rainforest formula!
RENALDO: If she doesn't, we'll frame her for a bank robbery and send her up the river!
DANGERESQUE: That's kinda harsh!

DANGERESQUE: Cutesy Buttons better be ready to fork over several sacks of cash for rescuing her and getting her rainforest formula!
RENALDO: Well, it's not about the money for me, Dangeresque. I just want to be a hero one more time before I retire.
DANGERESQUE: You'll always be a hero to me, Renaldo.
RENALDO: {unsettled} ...Uncomfortable...!

DANGERESQUE: Cutesy Buttons better be ready to fork over several sacks of cash for rescuing her and getting her rainforest formula!
RENALDO: Don't worry, she's an Environmental Conservationist, I'm sure she's loaded!

[edit] Renaldo → Stickanee Flower

DANGERESQUE: I heard a rumor that Brainblow City is the only place left in the world where the rare Stickanee Tree can be found.
RENALDO: That's fantastic! That means we won't have to travel the globe for this case like we did back in '91 when we were on the trail of the two-legged man!
DANGERESQUE: Yeah, I guess I didn't really think that one through too carefully.

DANGERESQUE: You know, this isn't the first time I've come in contact with the rare Stickanee flower.
RENALDO: Are you talking about that girl in Paris again? You've gotta let that go! After all, you ended up leaving her stranded in Cairo!
DANGERESQUE: {curiously} You don't think she's still mad about that?
RENALDO: Keep your head in the game, Dangeresque!

[edit] Agent Blue

[edit] Whale

DANGERESQUE: Pssst... Agent W. What's the inside word?
AGENT BLUE: Turn around! The terrarium's been flooded!
DANGERESQUE: {curiously} Hmmm, yes, I have no idea what that means.

DANGERESQUE: The Eagle is in the Pantry...
AGENT BLUE: Tame your hunger monster, try our half-hearted taco meal!

AGENT BLUE: Please pick up your Le Burger and French Fries and leave the tulip on the counter.
DANGERESQUE: Do I get any change?
AGENT BLUE: Please, stay the way you are.

AGENT BLUE: No more games, I'll take your rock and beat you with it.
DANGERESQUE: Come on now, let's not make this personal!

DANGERESQUE: Pssst... are you the one they call... Deep Spout?
AGENT BLUE: On a sunny day, don't forget to bling out your power tools.
DANGERESQUE: {understandingly} Right, of course!

DANGERESQUE: Pssst... Code Blue... I need some info.
AGENT BLUE: When in Rome, show off whatcha got.
DANGERESQUE: But I'm not in Rome!
AGENT BLUE: That'll be 2000 Yen.

In extended play

STRONG BAD: Ah, the Drive-Thru Whale. {Pause} I have no idea how this got in the movie. Anyone? No? Ugh, it's probably a union thing.

[edit] Nunchuck Gun → Whale

DANGERESQUE: {Whips out his nunchuck gun} Put 'em up, dirtbag! {The whale's water spout flies up into the air, then reappears from inside the whale.}

If the spout is bent

DANGERESQUE: {Whips out his nunchuck gun} Put 'em up, dirtbag! {The whale's water spout flies off, arcs over and knocks the box off the top of the Photo Booth, then reappears from inside the whale.}

[edit] Rock → Whale

{Dangeresque whacks the whale with the rock. The rock stops dead when it makes contact, leaving Strong Bad vibrating in reaction, cartoon-style}
{The whale's spout is now bent at an angle}

[edit] Brainblow City Prison

[edit] Brainblow City Prison

DANGERESQUE: Ah, the old Brainblow City Prison. I can't tell you how many times I've broken in and out of this place. {Turns to the camera} Seriously, I can't tell you. I'm under a gag order from the courts.

In extended play

STRONG BAD: When we came up with the idea for a jail, we knew that Bubs' Concession Stand would be the perfect location. But we were surprised to learn that it actually used to be a tiny prison, and that Bubs was the only inmate!
BUBS: I used to sell foot-long hot dogs with files hidden in 'em to myself!

[edit] Diamonocle

First time only
DANGERESQUE: Listen, Diamonocle... I know you have a grudge against me for locking you up in this joint, but I need to break into some scumbag kidnapper's hideout and you are gonna help me!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Relax! Turns out, prison's the best thing that ever happened to me! Getting shivved repeatedly in the yard really puts things into perspective. I'm a new man!
DANGERESQUE: Are you sure? I was kind of looking forward to locking you in a cell and beating the answers out of you. I mean a crooked cop's gotta stay bent, right?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: {bends down} If you want, you can crack me over the head with this bottle of Bull Honkey Sport...
{holds up the aforementioned can, breaking character}
BUBS: Only $3.99 a bottle! "It's like sweatin' on the inside!"
STRONG BAD: {annoyed} Hey, I told you, no product placement!

DANGERESQUE: I need some info, Diamonocle.
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: I'm your inside man!

In extended play

STRONG BAD: Hey, Bubs! Say "hi" to all the fans out there!
BUBS: I don't do interviews. It's in my contract.
STRONG BAD: What? No! This isn't an interview... it's a documentary!
BUBS: Oh, well that's different. I get time-and-a-half for those!

[edit] Diamonocle → Renaldo

DANGERESQUE: Good thing Renaldo isn't here right now, he hates to see hardened criminals go all soft serve. Says he's got no respect for tough guys that turn out to be wimps!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Where is ol' Fez Head?
DANGERESQUE: Ummm... He's waiting back at the brick wall... where it's safe.

[edit] Diamonocle → Diamonocle

DANGERESQUE: Okay, I have a kidnapping to solve and a hideout to break into. You're gonna have to tell me all your secrets.
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Now why would I wanna do that?

[edit] Diamonocle → Diamonocle → Angel

DANGERESQUE: Because, like you said, you're a new man! You've even lost a few pounds!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: {warm-heartedly} Can you really tell?
DANGERESQUE: Oh yeah. Your monocle's even looking a little loose!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: I've already had it taken in twice! Well, OK, I guess I can tell you. Don't let this get out, but I never did any of that stuff myself!
{Continued below}

[edit] Diamonocle → Diamonocle → Devil

DANGERESQUE: {Threateningly} Because if you don't, I'll have you transferred to Tri-Lambda Penitentiary!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: With all the white-collar criminals, hackers, and illegal downloaders of anime?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: You can't do that to me, man! What'll become of my street cred?
DANGERESQUE: Then 'fess up, or get ready to heavily protect your pocket!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Okay, you win, Dangeresque. The truth is, I never did any of that stuff!
{Continued below}

[edit] Diamonocle → Diamonocle → either option

{Continued from Angel or Devil options above}
DANGERESQUE: {shocked} What?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: I always hired guys to do that stuff for me! If you want to break into a kidnapper's hideout and rescue the hostage, you're gonna need the two best minds in the business... but you're not gonna like it!
DANGERESQUE: {annoyed} Why do people keep telling me that?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Both are people from your past. One is an expert kidnapping solver, and the other is the man with the plan!

[edit] Diamonocle → Perducci silhouette

DANGERESQUE: Who is this "man with the plan"?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: The "plan" is literally the architectural plans to the kidnapper's hideout. You'll definitely need those for breakin' in purposes! And the "man" is your long time arch enemy... Perducci! {mispronounced as "Per-dookie"}
DANGERESQUE: {looks up and waves his fist} PERDUCCI!!!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: He's set up shop in an abandoned night club on the edge of Brainblow City!
{To Diamonocle → Cancel}

[edit] Diamonocle → Dadgeresque silhouette

DANGERESQUE: Expert Kidnapping Solver... is that even a real job?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: It used to be. And this man was the best, that is until he got mixed up in a case that he just couldn't solve. It drove him mad! Mad I say!
DANGERESQUE: Wait, I thought you said this was someone from my past. I don't know any kidnapping solvers!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Oh, you know him more than you know that you know that you know... him... or somethin'. Ask your partner Renaldo, he'll know where to find him!

[edit] Diamonocle → Sultry Buttons

Only appears after Renaldo gets kidnapped
DANGERESQUE: Let me ask you something: How do you con the lady-types out of all their expensive jewel-ery?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Oh that's easy, man. You've just gotta find a place they find romantic, give them a couple of presents, and tell 'em you're dying of pretendicitis! They practically throw their money at you!
DANGERESQUE: That could work, if I had any idea what city Sultry Buttons thought was romantic.

[edit] Diamonocle → The Sun

Only appears after Renaldo gets kidnapped
DANGERESQUE: I need to get to the Sun. Got any criminal projectives for me?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Well, you could steal yourself a rocket-powered car, or some rocket boots, or a jet-pack filled with rocket fuel.
DANGERESQUE: Man, I don't know where to find any of that stuff. Maybe I can just find a rocket.

[edit] Diamonocle → Cancel

DANGERESQUE: If I need any more info, I'll be back.
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: You know where to find me! At least for the next 5 to 10!
The first time after speaking about the expert kidnapping solver
DANGERESQUE: Thanks for the info, Diamonocle. Sounds like me and a certain "to be retired sooner than he thinks" partner of mine need to have a little talk.
{Cue wipe transition back to the Brick Wall. Dangeresque had just walked his way back.}
DANGERESQUE: So, Renaldo, a little Baron tells me you know something about an expert kidnapping solver.
{Change viewpoint to Renaldo. The sound of wind hitting a microphone can clearly be heard.}
RENALDO: Uh oh. Now, I don't think that's something we should be talking about.
{Change viewpoint back to normal.}
DANGERESQUE: I thought we were partners! What are you hiding from me?!
{Change view back to Renaldo. More wind can be heard.}
RENALDO: He's no good for this case, Dangeresque! Forget about him!
{Change viewpoint back to normal.}
DANGERESQUE: Who?! Who are you talking about?
DANGERESQUE: Dadgeresque? My father is the kidnapping solver?
RENALDO: Yes, that's why he left you. Because he went mad! He's no help to us.
DANGERESQUE: Where is he now?
RENALDO: Last I heard he was wondering around Venice, but-
DANGERESQUE: Then pack your bags, Renaldo! We're going to France! {Jump cut} We're going to Italy!

[edit] Big Knife → Diamonocle

DANGERESQUE: {Waving around the knife} Hey, I think this would make a pretty good shiv!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Now how would I get THAT past security? Ooh, I know! Give it here!
DANGERESQUE: Ugh, whatever you have in mind is something I do NOT want to see. I think I'll hold on to it.

[edit] Blueprints → Diamonocle

DANGERESQUE: {Holding out the blueprints} Take a look at this!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Those look like the plans I sold to Perduke-cci!
DANGERESQUE: You've seen these before?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Yeah, I got a hundred of them back in my cell.

[edit] Nunchuck Gun → Diamonocle

DANGERESQUE: {Whipping out his nunchuck gun} You're under arrest!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: I know I am! I'm already in prison!
DANGERESQUE: Oh yeah. {Puts it away}

[edit] Romantic Photo → Diamonocle

DANGERESQUE: {Holding out the photo} Check me out!
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Looking good. Hey, is that you, Sultry Buttons and a Stickanee flower? I got one of those done too! {Holds up a photo exactly like the one Dangeresque has, except that it has himself with a huge mustache in place of Dangeresque.}

[edit] Trinket → Diamonocle

DANGERESQUE: {Pulling out the trinket} What do you and your criminal mind make of this?
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Hmm... maybe it's a key of some kind. I used to use big ol' chunks of metal like that to bust locks open all the time!

[edit] Sign

DANGERESQUE: {reading the sign} Visiting hours: not now. {Turns to camera} I'm not really interested in having a face-to-face with guys I sent to the pokey anyway. They do not like it when I call it "the pokey".

DANGERESQUE: {reading the sign} Visiting hours: not now. {Turns to camera} Guess that means come back later.

[edit] Tuft of Grass

Only clickable once
DANGERESQUE: What the heck is this? {Finds a monocle}
BARON DARIN DIAMONOCLE: Oh, that's probably one of my spare monocles! It must have rolled through the bars to freedom!
DANGERESQUE: I gotta remember to try this thing on myself! I wonder if it'll make me look more diabolical and German?

[edit] City Limits

[edit] City Limits Sign

Either sign
DANGERESQUE: I can't go any further in this direction. It's too not dangerous enough for me to bother with.
Sign near the prison
DANGERESQUE: Looks like I've reached the Brainblow City Limits. Nothing more this way but desolate wastelands and probably tar pits.
Sign near the car
DANGERESQUE: I'm wanted outside Brainblow City for "Undisclothed Violations". If I go beyond this point, I could be shot on sight.

[edit] Nunchuck Gun → City Limits Sign

First time only, and only on the sign near the prison
DANGERESQUE: {pulls out the nunchuck gun} Okay, sign, this is border control. Do you have any fruit to declare? {A bed sheet falls out of the sign} Whoa! That's way better than fruit! {He picks it up} Wow! Dangeresque-brand Renaldo bed sheets! They wet themselves so you don't have to!

[edit] DangeCar-esque

[edit] Cool Car

Only clickable before the car chase scene

DANGERESQUE: My trusty DangeCar-esque. I've just had all its cool gadgets upgraded to cool cool gadgets! Be patient, my high performance pal, your time to shine will come soon enough! {turns away from the car} Foreshadowing!!

In extended play

STRONG BAD: Originally, the car auto-autopilot was going to have the ability to talk back to me. But when Mr. Dee Williams pulled out, we just... you know... it just didn't seem the same any more.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {Walking past, singing to the tune of Billie Jean} Billy Dee is not my lover...

[edit] Metal Detector

DANGERESQUE: {digs up a bullet} Check out this stray bullet, apparently monogrammed by... {confused} ...Killingyouguy?

[edit] Car Chase Scene

{The camera zooms in towards the car, with Dangeresque driving in it. The Cheat can be seen in the background moving a tree back and forth, simulating the car's movement.}
DANGERESQUE: {holds a VCR to the side of his head} You got the- you got the Big Daddy D calling all agents! Please check in!
CUTESY BUTTONS: {voiceover} Breaker, breaker! I lost track of Renaldo, but I'm catching up fast! I'll be there as soon as I can! Over! {imitates static}
DANGERESQUE: Make it snappy, Yellow 5! {camera zooms out to show Killingyouguy "chasing" him} I've got a smokey on my six... and this round... sixes are wild! {puts down the VCR}
{The camera moves to give the illusion of the car taking hard corners.}
DANGERESQUE: AND MY BRAKES HAVE BEEN CUT! Looks like I'll have to do some extravehicular activities. Good thing my car was recently upgraded to receive voice commands... which I'll probably only use this one time and then forget about it forever. Take over, auto-autopilot!
{Dangeresque jumps up onto the roof of the car, with the autopilot - Bubs's security robot - taking over the driving.}

[edit] After a few actions

{If Dangeresque is on the car's hood, he will jump back to the roof. A toy helicopter held by Coach Z is brought in front of the camera, with a small Cardboard Marzipan model taped onto one of its windows. Occasionally, Coach Z will spin the helicopter's main rotor with his other hand.}
CUTESY BUTTONS: {voiceover} Dangeresque, it's me! What's going on down there?
DANGERESQUE: Ummm... now is not really a good time to chat. Get that chopper closer!
CUTESY BUTTONS: {voiceover} I can't get any closer! You try to be taller!

[edit] Autopilot

On occasion

DANGERESQUE: Activate voice commands!

[edit] Autopilot → Brakes

{The Autopilot pulls the brake. Nothing happens.}
DANGERESQUE: {sheepishly} Oh right, the brakes are cut.

{The Autopilot pulls the brake. Nothing happens.}
DANGERESQUE: With the brakes cut, I gotta find another way to slow this car down!

[edit] Autopilot → Escape Hatch

If Killingyouguy hasn't been pushed back
{The hatch door lifts, but Killingyouguy closes it while running.}
DANGERESQUE: Hey! Quit tailgating... unless you have some Cold Ones and potato salad to share!
If Killingyouguy has been pushed back
{The hatch door opens.}

[edit] Autopilot → Missiles

{A cardboard missile - thrown by The Cheat - is launched in front of the car. Nothing happens.}
DANGERESQUE: Well, that was useless.

[edit] Autopilot → Oil Slick

If Killingyouguy hasn't been pushed back
DANGERESQUE: Let's see how well Tiny can keep up on an OIL SLICK!
{The Cheat runs behind the car and pours grease from a Blubb-O's cup under Strong Mad's feet, who then starts to pretend to slip.}
{After the next action, Strong Mad recovers and starts running normally again.}
If Killingyouguy has been pushed back
{The Cheat runs behind the car and pours grease onto where Strong Mad's feet should have been.}
DANGERESQUE: {turns to the camera} I guess it's only effective when people are right up all in my grill.
If Killingyouguy is underneath the hatch
DANGERESQUE: I wonder if this'll work again? OIL SLICK!
{The Cheat runs behind the car and tips the cup of grease near Strong Mad's feet, but nothing comes out.}

[edit] Autopilot → Sawmerang

If Dangeresque hasn't obtained a Sawmerang yet
{The camera focuses to one of the tires, before showing a jump cut transition to that tire having a cardboard sawmerang placed onto it.}
DANGERESQUE: Man, if there were cool tanks, or maybe a street luger driving beside me right now, they would be so totally shredded!
If the hubcaps have been deployed but not taken
{Shot of the wheel with hubcaps in place}
DANGERESQUE: Huh? I guess to deploy the hubcaps again, I need to un-deploy them first. I'll have to remember to install that feature next time.
If Dangeresque already has a Sawmerang
{The camera focuses to the same tire that had a sawmerang materialize before. This time, nothing happens.}
DANGERESQUE: What?! They don't replenish? Fine! I'll just have to use the one I already have.

[edit] Autopilot → Smokescreen

{Jump cut to the car now showing a firework taped onto it. A blast of smoke from it covers Killingyouguy.}
DANGERESQUE: Whoa! That didn't even slow him down! Must be from years of henching in smokey dives!

[edit] Front

DANGERESQUE: I'm gonna have to slow this car down the prehistoric way! {jumps down and pushes his back against the front} Owwww!!! Oww oww oww oww oww! {jumps back up}
If Killingyouguy has been pushed back
KILLINGYOUGUY: {edges closer to the car} I'M GETTING CLOSER!
If Killingyouguy is close to the car or hasn't been pushed back, he bumps into the hatch while running.

[edit] Hatch

When on the hood
DANGERESQUE: There's no way I can jump... {accentuation on "jump"} ...to the top of that hatch from here!
If Killingyouguy isn't underneath the hatch door
{Dangeresque jumps onto the hatch, which starts to close as soon as he lands on it. He starts slipping on the door as he struggles to return to the roof.}
DANGERESQUE: Bad idea! Bad idea! {falls onto his back and rebounds onto the roof} Oof!
CUTESY BUTTONS: {voiceover} You almost had it, Dangeresque! See if you can prop that hatch up with something!
DANGERESQUE: {aloud to himself} See if you can patch your trap up with something!
CUTESY BUTTONS: {voiceover} What?
DANGERESQUE: {looks up} Nothing!
If Killingyouguy is underneath the hatch door
DANGERESQUE: Looks like I'm gonna have to-
CUTESY BUTTONS: {voiceover, interrupts} Shut up and get up here!
{Dangeresque jumps onto the hatch and for the helicopter. He holds onto one of the railings for it, before climbing on board. The scene transitions to the inside of the helicopter.}

[edit] Helicopter

When on the roof
DANGERESQUE: Errgh! {Jumps and reaches for the helicopter} I just can't reach it from here! I need to find a way to get higher!
When on the hood
DANGERESQUE: I'm WAY too far from the helicopter! I'm not even gonna try to jump... {accentuated the same way as the catchprase "looks like I'm gonna have to jump..."} ...from here.

[edit] Nunchuck Gun → Helicopter

DANGERESQUE: {Aims the nunchuck gun at the helicopter} Don't make me use this on you, Cutesy Buttons!
CUTESY BUTTONS: {Shot of her inside the helicopter} Don't you threaten me, Dangeresque. I'll leave you here!
DANGERESQUE: No! Just... wait. I'll find a way to get to you!

[edit] Killingyouguy

DANGERESQUE: Oh no! Killingyouguy is right on my tail in this high-speed stunt-spectacular car chase! If he catches up, I'm done for!

DANGERESQUE: Aren't you getting tired yet?

[edit] Nunchuk Gun → Killingyouguy

DANGERESQUE: {points the gun at Killingyouguy and imitates gunfire} Pchew! Pchew! Pchow! Pchew!
DANGERESQUE: Bullet proof?! That's hardly fair! {puts the gun away}

[edit] Small Rock → Killingyouguy

DANGERESQUE: A puny little rock like this won't do anything against that pummeling machine!

[edit] Scissors → Killingyouguy

DANGERESQUE: Not a bad idea, but the blades on these scissors are nowhere near deadly enough to affect that guy!

[edit] Roof → Hood

{Strong Bad jumps to the hood.}
Hood → Roof has the same effect, albeit in reverse.

[edit] Sawmerang

DANGERESQUE: {jumps to the hood if he's not already there} Only a black belt in Pad Prik Pork like myself can remove one of these Sawmerang hubcaps while it's still spinning. {hangs off the car from the side, waiting for the perfect moment to grab the... spinning hubcap} Ennhhh... ennnhhh... {takes the Sawmerang and jumps back up to the hood} Got it!

[edit] Sawmerang → Killingyouguy

If Killingyouguy isn't slipping on the oil slick
DANGERESQUE: {jumps to the hood if he's not already there} This oughtta slow the big guy down! SAWMERANG!
{Dangeresque throws the Sawmerang at Killingyouguy, who loses his balance while running. A jump cut shows Dangeresque's throwing animation in reverse, creating the effect of the Sawmerang rebounding back to him. Cut back to Killingyouguy, regaining his balance.}
DANGERESQUE: Well, he stumbled a bit, but not much else. Sure was fun though!
If Killingyouguy is slipping on the oil slick
DANGERESQUE: {jumps to the hood if he's not already there} Hey Killingyouguy! You should have "saw" this coming!
{Dangeresque throws the Sawmerang at Killingyouguy, who gets knocked back and lands in a sitting position. A jump cut shows Dangeresque's throwing animation in reverse, creating the effect of the Sawmerang rebounding back to him. Cut back to Killingyouguy, who has returned to his feet.}
KILLINGYOUGUY: YOU KNOCKED ME DOWN! {starts running, with the camera view showing that he's slightly further away from the car} NOW I'M BACK!
DANGERESQUE: Whoa! That guy is unstoppable!
If Killingyouguy is underneath the hatch
DANGERESQUE: This oughtta slow the big guy down! SAWMERANG!
{Dangeresque throws the Sawmerang at Killingyouguy, but it simply deflects off of the hatch.}

[edit] Helicopter Set

[edit] Inside

{Continues from the car chase scene. Interior of the helicopter, with Cutesy Buttons at the controls.)
DANGERESQUE: {seductively} What took ya so long?
CUTESY BUTTONS: Uh huh. You're lucky you made it out alive!
DANGERESQUE: I had the situation totally under control, babe. And I got your formula!
{He gives the formula to Cutesy Buttons}
CUTESY BUTTONS: Now I can save the rainforest! I'll start by planting a nursery in my backyard! {The camera viewpoint changes to show both Dangeresque and Cutesy Buttons, the latter suddenly wearing a parachute on her back.} Goodbye Dangeresque, I'll never forget you! {jumps out of the helicopter} Ahhhhhhh...
{During the next line, the camera pans out to focus on Dangeresque. Marzipan can be seen leaving the set.}
UZI BAZOOKA: {voiceover portrayed by Homestar Runner, imitates static} Dangeresque, it is I, Uzi Bazooka!
{Jump cut to Dangeresque holding the VCR to his head.}
DANGERESQUE: You're too late, Bazooka! I already gave the formula back to Cutesy Buttons!
UZI BAZOOKA: {voiceover} I don't care about the formula! I never did! I just want to make you suffer! And now I have kidnapped your partner, Renaldo!
RENALDO: {voiceover; the camera shakes during his line} Dangeresque! Don't listen to him!
UZI BAZOOKA: {voiceover} I'm taking him to my secret space station on the sun! If you want to save him, come and get him!
{breaks character as he gets confused about the line's emphasis}
HOMESTAR RUNNER:...Come and GET him... COME and get him... come AND get him... Yeah, go with the first one.
{Dangeresque lowers the VCR unamusingly. Cue a jump cut to him standing near the helicopter's entrance.}
DANGERESQUE: Yep. Looks like I'm seriously gonna have to jump! {jumps out from the entrance}
{The player is taken back to the Brainblow City Set at this point.}

[edit] Outside

STRONG BAD: Oh, that is just... nothing. {Walks behind the camera} Strong Sad, I told you to strike the helicopter set! {There is a thump and the camera shakes}
STRONG SAD: Ow! I said I'll get it later!

[edit] Kidnapper's Hideout

The player is automatically taken here after obtaining the plans and rescuing the hostage.
{The Kidnapper's Hideout set is located at the top of Bubs' Concession Stand. The scene begins with Dangeresque climbing to the roof.}
DANGERESQUE: {grunt} Come on guys, according to... {pulls himself onto the roof with another grunt} ...Perducci's plans, the best way to break in is through the roof!
{The camera swings around, showing Dangeresque Too present in the scene.}
DANGERESQUE TOO: That's what I wanted you to think! You fell right into my trap!
{The camera pans out to show him standing near Killingyouguy and the Cheat, with Cutesy Buttons standing behind them. The camera then changes viewpoint to show Dangeresque, now standing near Renaldo and Dadgeresque.}
RENALDO: Holy gorsh! It's Dangeresque Too?
DANGERESQUE: {shocked} Dangeresque Too? How could you? And with such an awesome name. {raises his fist and speaks bitterly and slowly} I thought we were friends!
DADGERESQUE: {walks around behind Strong Bad} Is this where I pawnder my old pidgeon?
{Camera view changes back to Dangeresque Too.}
DANGERESQUE TOO: You thought wrong, Dangeresque! Call me... UZI BAZOOKA!
THE CHEAT: {lowers his bazooka} Mehr!
UZI BAZOOKA: Now, give me the formula and I'll give you this computer disk of highly important rocket launch codes! {holds up a blue floppy disk}
RENALDO: Hey! Professor Experimento's launch codes! We need those!
DANGERESQUE: No dice, traitor Joe!
UZI BAZOOKA: Oh yeah, well what if I... {raises a blue toy gun} ...shoot your dad?
{A gunshot sound effect is heard. The scene changes perspective, now showing Senor Cardgage on the ground clutching his chest with one hand and his head lying on some newspaper - apparently sleeping.}
DANGERESQUE: {looks up, distressed} NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
DANGERESQUE: No, Dad! {crouches down towards Senor Cardgage} Don't you... sniff... die on me!
RENALDO: {concerned} Oh, he don't look too good.
DANGERESQUE: {anguished} Don't do this, Dad! You have to hang on! Did you ever know that you're my hero? We've only just begun! You're the wind beneath my wings! Umm... She Bop!
RENALDO: {subdued} He's gone, Dangeresque.
{During Renaldo's line, Senor Cardgage is seen leaving the scene.}
DANGERESQUE: {anguished} WHYYY!!! He was my father! It's not fair! Oh cruel world! {pronounced "cru-elle wuh-rorld"} {starts speaking distraughtfully} How could you take my only father from me? Why now? Whhhyyyyy?! {angrily turns towards Uzi Bazooka} BAAZZOOOKAAAA!!!! {Pulls out his nunchuck gun}
{A Mexican stand-off commences, with everyone aiming guns at everyone else. During this scene, Cutesy Buttons will advance one space to the right per action, if she is able. If any of the bad guys backs into her, they will catch her and send her back to the start.}

[edit] Killingyouguy

{Killingyouguy and The Cheat jump to the front row, Uzi Bazooka jumps to the back.}
{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: Hold it right there, Wide Load!
RENALDO: All we want is the girl!
DANGERESQUE: And the disks! Don't forget the disks.
UZI BAZOOKA: No way, Jose! {Pronounces it with the J}

[edit] The Cheat

{Uzi Bazooka and The Cheat jump to the front row, Killingyouguy jumps to the back.}
First time only
DANGERESQUE: Give me what I want or I'll shoot your fuzzy little buddy!
RENALDO: He'll do it! I've seen him exterminate yellow spotted hamsters before!
THE CHEAT: {annoyed} Mrrreehhhh!
UZI BAZOOKA: Whoa, whoa, whoa... take it easy! Ix-nay on the amster-hay!

[edit] Uzi Bazooka

{Uzi Bazooka and Killingyouguy jump to the front row, The Cheat jumps to the back.}
First time only
DANGERESQUE: You killed my father! Prepare to... {speaks quickly} ...have a bullet from my Nunchuck Gun pierce your flesh causing internal injuries and bleeding which, if left unchecked, could cause you to die!
RENALDO: That's far enough!
DANGERESQUE: Hand over the girl and the disks, scumball... bag!
UZI BAZOOKA: Forget it, Dingle-esque! Besides, these aren't even my stolen disks of important launch codes. I'm just holding them for Perducci!

[edit] Renaldo

{Uzi Bazooka jumps to the front row, Killingyouguy and The Cheat jump to the back.}
First time only
DANGERESQUE: Renaldo, tell Bazooka we want the girl and the disks!
RENALDO: Ahhh! Bazooka, we want the girl and the disks!
RENALDO: He said no. Sorry, Dangeresque, I did my best.

[edit] If Killingyouguy bumps into Cutesy Buttons

CUTESY BUTTONS: Ooops! I'll... just be back over here. {goes back to her starting position}

[edit] If The Cheat bumps into Cutesy Buttons

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}
CUTESY BUTTONS: Okay, okay, I'm going back! {goes back to her starting position}

[edit] If Uzi Bazooka bumps into Cutesy Buttons

UZI BAZOOKA: Hey, just where do you think YOU'RE going, Missy?
CUTESY BUTTONS: Who, me? Uh, nowhere. Just... gonna go back over here. {goes back to her starting position}

[edit] When Cutesy Buttons reaches the disk

{Cutesy Buttons walks to Uzi Bazooka's left and pinches the disk from him.}
CUTESY BUTTONS: I've got the disks! Good work stalling them until I could clear an escape route, Dangeresque!
UZI BAZOOKA: Hey, you tricked me! Take 'em down, Killingyouguy!
DANGERESQUE: {turns away from Uzi Bazooka, with Cutesy Buttons and Renaldo doing the same} Uh oh! Looks like we're gonna have to jump!!
{All three prepare to jump. The scene cuts to the jump being enacted by their respective stunt doubles - Strong Sad, Cardboard Marzipan and a bonsai tree with Coach Z's Z, though Cardboard Marzipan and the bonsai tree are the wrong way around. All three of them land flat on their faces. Cue a jump cut to Strong Bad, Marzipan and Coach Z standing up from that position, in the same order as they were on the roof.}
RENALDO: That was close! {points ahead of him} Uh oh, here they come!
DANGERESQUE: Everybody scatter! We'll meet up at the rendez-vous {pronounced "rondess-vouce"} point!
{All three run in different directions. After they all leave, Coach Z walks to the other side of the camera's viewpoint, presumably to turn it off. The player is automatically taken to the car chase scene at this point.}

[edit] Shark Pond

[edit] Shark Pond

Before Credenza gets put in
DANGERESQUE: {looks directly at the water} Man, those sure are some... way under the water sharks!
While Credenza is in the pond
DANGERESQUE: Hah! That ought to get Cutesy Buttons's attention!
In extended play
STRONG BAD: The shark pond set also doubles as a lava pit, a pie factory, a piranha sandwich and a cursèd kiddie pool.

[edit] Plant → Shark Pond

DANGERESQUE: Okay, stupid plant. Can you swim? 'Cause you're about to get... WATERED! {Tosses the plant into the pond}

[edit] Stickanee Flower → Shark Pond

DANGERESQUE: {Holds the flower over the pond} Whoa, those sharks are going crazy over this dumb flower! I wonder if they're vegetarians. I better not get too close, I need this flower. {Puts it away}

[edit] Snap Shak

[edit] Wardrobe

On first entry
DANGERESQUE: I guess it could't hurt to have a few more mug shots made. {Goes inside} Hey, I remember this place! This is the old Inter-galactional Department of Under Cover Disguises!
First entry in extended play
STRONG BAD: This is our wardrobe department. Follow me! {Goes inside}
On entry
STRONG BAD: I'm ready for my close-up!

STRONG BAD: Okay, let's do this!

STRONG BAD: Time for some modeling styles!
On exit
STRONG BAD: Catch ya on the flip side, The Cheat!

STRONG BAD: Well, I guess I'd better get back to... whatever it was I was doing before.

STRONG BAD: That's enough modeling for today.
When falling over the edge
STRONG BAD: Hoop! {Falls from above, or horizontally across the floor} Aaahh! {Lands back where he started}

{Every third time, and when already inverted}
STRONG BAD: Hoop! Whoa! {Lands on the other side of the floor}
When finding the secret clothing item
{First time only}
STRONG BAD: Looking good!

[edit] The Cheat

THE CHEAT: {Quizzical The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: Yeah I want my picture taken!
THE CHEAT: {Extended oration in Cheat-speak}
STRONG: BAD: Hang on, I'm gonna need some help. The Paper, take a note! {The Paper comes down, containing instructions for using the photo booth}

[edit] Any clothing item → Strong Bad

The following lines are spoken only occasionally, but in order, when some item is put on. If an item has a unique line listed below, that line is always spoken the first time the item is put on, and only the first time.
STRONG BAD: Soak it in, ladies.

STRONG BAD: Styles upon styles!

STRONG BAD: Who, me?

STRONG BAD: Let's-a do lunch.

STRONG BAD: Whatever, baby.

STRONG BAD: I'm on a collision course with sultriness...



STRONG BAD: Check me out!

STRONG BAD: Is this me or what?

STRONG BAD: Why yes, I HAVE done some modeling before.

STRONG BAD: Lookin' good!

STRONG BAD: Charming!

STRONG BAD: Ohh, ah-ha-ha!

STRONG BAD: Do you have the time?

[edit] Hats

[edit] Carabowdit Hair → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: What? Yeah, it's a girl's wig, so what? I got book smarts! I don't need look smarts!
[edit] Homestar's Head → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: {In Homestar voice} Oh, hewwo. I'm a no-armed whitey. I wrote the book on having a stupid butt. It's called "Tennis Pwactice for Jeffwey".
[edit] Knit Cap → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: I'm ready for the big heist! Those smoky red laser beams don't stand a chance when I'm in this get up!
[edit] Red Chef Hat → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: Today we're making The Cheat a L'Orange. It's considered a delicacy in East Strong Badia.

[edit] Shirts

[edit] Max Shirt → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: This is the most rarest, awesomest shirt ever! I have got to get a picture of me in this to make all my friends jeal-aws! Man, they only wish they had this hotness!
[edit] Sports Jacket → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: I'll see you in court! Or Wall Street! ...or something.

[edit] Accessories

[edit] Championship Belt → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: Well that's right, announcerman, the Sizzle-Weight Belt is back where it belongs! And Jack-em-up Kid, you're going down! ... kid.
[edit] Thin Mustache → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: {In Old-Timey Strong Bad voice} I'll tie you to the dastardly train tracks! And wear a cape for no good reason!

[edit] Outfits

[edit] King of Town's Crown + King of Town's Beard → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: Doo-hoo-hoo! I'm the King of Town! Faaaat! Faaaaaaaaaaaat! That's the sound of me breathing.
[edit] Thin Mustache + Beret → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: {In a fake French accent} Oh, Mademoiselle! Oh, Cosmopolitan! Oh, Elle! Oh, Vogue! Oh... how you say... Redbook?

[edit] Box

When it's on the roof of the photo booth
DANGERESQUE: {struggles to reach for the box} I can't... quite... reach it...!
When it's on the ground
STRONG BAD: {Looks underneath} Awesome. {Finds a hat} Oh man. {Calling} Wardrobe! Someone left this out! {Angrily} No no, I'll take care of it. I'll just put it back in the photo booth myself.

[edit] Small Rock → Box

When it's on the roof of the photo booth
DANGERESQUE: {Throws the rock at the box. It doesn't move} Well... that was useless.

[edit] The Stick

[edit] Stickanee Tree

Before the flower gets picked
DANGERESQUE: The rare Stickanee. Looks like this was the last flower on the last tree. Good thing I got that Lorax framed for murder!
After the flower gets picked
DANGERESQUE: It does look kinda plain now. Just some dead branches hangin' off.

DANGERESQUE: {anguished} Oh, what have I done?! In an attempt to save the rainforest I've wiped out an entire forest of tree!

DANGERESQUE: You know what? I don't even care. Rare plant extinctor is the 12th profession listed on my business card.
While Sultry Buttons is at large
DANGERESQUE: Oh man. I already took the last Stickanee flower from this tree! How am I ever going to get it to grow a new one to give to Sultry Buttons?
In extended play
STRONG BAD: I know it's impossible to tell, but the rare Stickanee Tree in this movie was actually... a-THE STICK! The Stick spent nine hours a day with a team of seven make-up artists, thirteen puppeteers, and seven... er, key grips, just to complete the illusion.

[edit] Diet Cola → Stickanee Tree

First time only
DANGERESQUE: Here you go, little stick. {Pours cola on the stick, causing it to produce a box of cereal} Whoa! You sprouted a... something!

Formula → Stickanee Tree will have the same effect

[edit] Knife → Stickanee Tree

If DAngeresque does not have a branch
DANGERESQUE: Don't worry, The Stick, this is gonna hurt me a lot more than it hurts you. Actually, that's a really big lie I just told you right there just now. {Pulls out the knife and swings it past the Stick, producing a branch lying on the ground}
If Dangeresque already has a branch
DANGERESQUE: I'm not THAT cruel. No need to hack off another branch when I already have one!

[edit] Safety Scissors → Stickanee Tree

DANGERESQUE: These safety scissors are probably sharp enough to cut through oatmeal, melted butter, or freshly baked milkshakes, but there is no way they can take down this mighty timber!

[edit] Branch

{Dangeresque picks up the branch without saying anything.}

[edit] Cereal Box

STRONG BAD: {Takes the box} This actually looks like a nutritious part of your healthy breakfast, and not at all like a cheap marketing tie-in that has absolutely nothing to do with this movie!

[edit] Flower

DANGERESQUE: This must be the rare Stickanee flower that Professor Experimento needs for the formula. I'll just carefully remove this last delicate blossom... {takes it}
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