From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 00:05, 14 May 2022

209 Seconds (Rough Estimate)

(The entirety of 160 Seconds, but with "160" in the intro replaced with "209")

4 branches: HOMESTAR: Chinese b-

the chair: STRONG BAD: Class!

what i want: MARZIPAN: Forgettably precious.

looking old: MARZIPAN: Up to your chin right

strong badathlon: STRONG BAD: To the wrong athletes

unnatural: STRONG BAD: Kill him? STRONG SAD: We do-

the movies: HOMESTAR: -tuce. Throw

your funeral: HOMESTAR: Abraham Lincoln

from work: HOMESTAR: -veges. It helps

rough copy: STRONG SAD: -tellectual property.

underlings: STRONG BAD: Get Mrs. Hard-

more armies: HOMESTAR: Saaay

the paper: STRONG BAD: Doesn't quite

mini-golf: STRONG BAD: In this infernal pl-

concert: STRONG BAD: Nope. They're a

hygiene: STRONG BAD: No matter what he does.

original: BUBS: B'zuh!

bike thief: STRONG BAD: Side of this couch

pizza joint: MAN IN PIZZA COSTUME: It burns!

slumber party: STRONG BAD: Can you guys start

web comics: TAKE DAGGER: Hiya

business trip: THE KING OF TOWN: Units? STRONG BAD: What

yes wrestling: HOMESTAR: The power... of

diorama: STRONG BAD: -lupe Hidalgo

nightlife: HOMESTAR RUNNER: More...more

environment: STRONG BAD: -pliant sticker!

winter pool: HOMESTAR: You're such a good

fan club: STRONG BAD: (screams)

pet show: HOMESTAR: Potion. A taste

licensed: (Strong Bad slides) STRONG BAD: What's

buried: BUBS: Is! STRONG SAD: Uh

shapeshifter: COACH Z: Coming to your concession

rated: BUBS: Bake sale!

specially marked: (The Deleted buzzer, and a message reading "SBEMAIL 194 IS NOT INCLUDED BECAUSE IT DOES NOT HAVE A 194th SECOND")

love poems: HOMESTAR: Apples!

hiding: STRONG BAD: Coma!

your edge: STRONG BAD: Where'd you check?

magic trick: STRONG BAD: But now, not only does

being mean: HUNGRY SHARK: Makes me wanna

email thunder: (Strong Bad runs out of Homestar's computer room)

hremail3184: COACH Z: Bad! I was gonna

imaginary: LIL' STRONG BAD: -ti! I'd like you to meet

independent: STRONG BAD: Solid gold sc-

dictionary: STRONG BAD: To Z

videography: STRONG BAD: (chuckles)

sbemail206: ANNOUNCER: For all your consummate

too cool: STRONG BAD: Mysteriously with no return

The Next April Fools Thing: STRONG BAD: -low lives, and this

parenting: THE KING OF TOWN: I've got this seven-

Alternate HRWiki

Limozeen

Out of all the phenomena in the Homestar Runner universe, Limozeen are notable in the respect that they are chiefly based in live-action, rather than animation. Indeed, exactly where and what Limozeen are in respect to the gang in Free Country is never entirely clear; they definitely both exist on the same plane of reality, but are never shown interacting with each other proper. This, however, is perhaps the best approach with such characters, as Limozeen are less important as who they actually are than how other characters see and appreciate them. In this sense, the only character who really has any proper relationship with the band is Strong Bad, who is devoted to the band with zealous abandon, and the band likewise has shown their appreciation for his fandom in various ways. The rest of Free Country is largely indifferent towards Limozeen, or do not even seem aware that it exists.

Limozeen’s origins trace to a Strong Bad E-mail in which Strong Bad declared that the best band names are slight misspellings of common words (although there exists a Dolly Parton album entitled “White Limozeen” that predates this e-mail). A later e-mail revealed that there existed a band named Limozeen, and that they were quite popular in Strong Badia. Only a quick shot of the band and a brief snippet from one of their songs were revealed, but this small exposure was enough to propel the band into a few extremely scattershot appearances in various venues, from minor cameos in Strong Bad E-mails to a bizarre set of online Thanksgiving greetings. Their finest hour, however, and definitely the catalyst that made them a notable – if comparatively minor – part of the site was their participation in the Strong Bad Sings CD. They contributed 2 original songs to this compilation, in marked contrast to the rest of the album, which largely consisted of re-recorded versions of existing songs on the site. (Taranchula, another band whose name debuted in the same e-mail as Limozeen’s, also contributed to the CD, but they slipped to obscurity rather quickly).

Limozeen’s music can be described as “hair metal”, or “glam rock”, a subculture of heavy metal music most prominent in the early 1980s. Limozeen exhibits many of the common features of hair metal: pounding percussion and bass, distorted guitar riffs, extraneous solos and a very anthemic mood, especially in the choruses. The lyrics walk the fine line between enigmatic, evocative imagery and errant nonsense; trying to dissect a deeper meaning from their songs is not a recommended endeavor. Limozeen also dresses the part of glam rock, sporting outrageous blonde wigs, accessories and costumes that manage at the same time to appear rugged and insurgent and yet oddly effeminate at the same time. All of this is portrayed with tongue in cheek, of course, but the truth of the matter is that Limozeen is not much stranger (and in some cases, even less strange) than the myriad of other hair metal bands from the 1980s.

The members of Limozeen (all of whom share the last name, at least professionally, of Palaroncini) have been physically played by a confused variety of stand-ins, especially in their earliest appearances. However, Matt Chapman (who has physically played Larry in all but one instance) has always performed the voice work for the band, both speaking and singing. It is perhaps a credit to Matt’s vocal skill that the Limozeen band members, at least in song, are not as “obvious” voices as the majority of the characters on the site (indeed, Limozeen could potentially make a name from themselves quite divorced from the rest of Homestar Runner with very few listeners making the connection).

Foremost of the band – dominating it by both prominence and sheer volume – is the lead singer, Larry. Larry is lithe and somewhat smaller than the others, but he more than makes up for any physical deficiency with his boundless energy, as well as his voice, which is ear-splittingly loud, high-pitched and almost ludicrously raw-edged, reminiscent of an early Jon Bon Jovi, or AC/DC’s Brian Johnson. It is this voice that gives Limozeen its particular sound. Comically, Larry uses the same volume, tenor and enunciation in his speaking voice as well as his singing voice, making his every line sound like its own performance. Larry has a habit of drawing out the final syllable of a sentence for a ridiculously long time.

Gary, the lead guitarist, by contrast seems to be a rational, down-to-earth sort of fellow. Not much is revealed of his personality otherwise, but he seems to be the most intelligent of the group, although this is not saying much. He has a habit of chiming in with an appropriate comment in a timely manner, but for the most part he lets his excellent guitar playing speak for him. Occasionally Gary takes over lead vocals from Larry, and the results are less dynamic and explosive but much more soulful and introspective.

Marry (or “Mary”; spellings differ), the percussionist, makes no effort to reverse the less than flattering reputation most rock drummers have garnered over the decades. He is a rather slovenly character, and is constantly reprimanded by his bandmates for committing some heedless faux pas, most of which involve his considerable appetite. His voice is deep and sonorous, and he appears to be considerably laid-back.

Perry, the bassist, is the least member of the group, nearly to the point of nonentity. He seldom contributes anything at all to the proceedings (save his musical skill, of course), and his voice sounds curiously like Stinkoman.

Recently, it has been revealed that Limozeen starred in their own animated television show (presumably in the 1980s), which was unceremoniously cancelled partway through its pilot episode (not surprisingly). The cartoon was entitled Limozeen: But They’re in Space!. As the title implies, the cartoon involved the band, clad in garish spacesuits, travelling through outer space in their rocket-powered tour bus. This is a cunning parody of many cartoons from the 1960s through the 1980s, which starred animated versions of well-known celebrities in situations and settings that were simultaneously fantastic and mundane.

The cartoon had no real plot; it mostly involved the band doing what they regularly do (perform at concerts, interact with the fans, and so on), only in an outer space venue. Much of the cartoon consisted of interstitial looped footage of the band running from their enthusiastic fans, a la The Beatles, and holding expositional conferences aboard their rocket bus. Strong Bad cannily describes the plot as consisting of the band “running away from and giving backstage passes to the hot babe-liens of the galaxy.” This, of course, is even more amusing with the realization that animated cartoons have been based on even less than this lightweight premise.

The animation, as one might expect, is extremely generic; other than the voices, the band members are nearly impossible to tell apart. The exception to this is Marry, whose slightly disheveled appearance has been exaggerated notably, making him a rotund (and inexplicably redheaded) buffoon, all the better to deign him the band’s comic relief. The band members as a whole are depicted in the animation as rather more clean-cut and well groomed than their live-action appearances would indicate. In fact, the life of a rock star and all it entails is hardly a premise suitable for creating a children’s cartoon, a contention the animators smoothly gloss over. Of course, many cartoons in the 1980s were based on films and other source material that were definitely not suitable for young audiences; the satire is implicit but very clear.

The most notable character introduced by the series is Teeg Dougland, who appears to be the band’s manager and general factotum. Clad in a loose, mismatched shirt/slacks ensemble, replete with coke-bottle glasses and a head of impossibly wavy brown hair, Teeg clashes horrendously, both in the outer space motif and among the hard rock image of the band. Teeg also habitually wears a glum little sign around his neck with his name emblazoned on it, for reasons best left unexplored. Despite his sad sack image, Teeg is a surprisingly upbeat character; this personality trait is made all the more hilarious in light of the fact that he never has any positive information for the band at any time. Indeed, he never seems able to make a statement without prefacing it with “I’m afraid I’ve got some bad news, boys”. He is a doomsayer, albeit a cheerful one. A minor note of interest is that Teeg is voiced by Mike Chapman, who reportedly provided source modeling for the character.

Ranged against the band is a bizarre duo of villains, who apparently have aspirations no higher than ruining Limozeen’s day. It is unknown how, if at all, the band members managed to defeat these foes, but in light of the cartoon’s truncated run this point is irrevocably moot. In the tradition of the old low-budget cartoons, the villains never actually appear onscreen with the heroes, instead opting to make threatening monologues directly to the camera in front of a static background.

The most dynamic of the villains, at least in strictly visual terms, is the autocratic Mitch Overlord, a cloaked, shadowy cyborg with a bald head, a ridiculous hydraulic-powered metal jaw that whines and clanks as he speaks, and a monogrammed two-pronged claw in the place of his right hand. His voice is deep and gravelly, and has a slight metallic echo. However, the triviality of his villainous deeds are in direct contrast to his ominous presence; the worst way he seems capable of subjugating Limozeen is by exploiting a loophole to deprive them of their precious backstage passes. That such a patently sinister villain would spend his time and energy irritating such an ineffectual group is laughable, and it does not reflect very well on either side that Mitch obviously would have lost the day time and again, had the show continued to air.

Far less impressive – if decidedly more active – is Bozar, described as a “magical prankster”. A somewhat puckish character, Bozar has the ability to alter reality in minor yet vital ways, such as disrupting a concert by transforming the band’s equipment into pasta. While these abilities would seem to make him a dangerous foe indeed, he seems more interested in annoying his victims than causing them any actual harm. Bozar is an impish old man in a laboratory coat, with a handlebar moustache and a pair of green goat-like horns sprouting from his head (the Puck connection). His head is shaped rather like a lightbulb, and his voice is a gloating, campy tenor. His general physical appearance, combined with his tendency of addressing Limozeen with schoolyard insults, is highly reminiscent of classic Superman villain Mr. Mxyzptlk, who wreaked similar havoc with a similar set of powers.

In all, where Limozeen “fits” within the Homestar Runner universe is hard to grasp, as the rest of the characters are relegated to viewing their performances second-hand, much as we are. In a sense, Limozeen is just as extrinsic to us as they are to the Free Country cast, and there are some very subtle emotional effects at play by making the viewers and the characters part of the same audience. This layering does not strike most people as odd when the actual videos are running, but the dichotomy is intriguing when analyzed in retrospect. While Limozeen will likely never ascend to a place amongst the “stars” of the website, they have certainly proved themselves worthy entertainers, albeit with more of a “cult” aspect. Limozeen has the potential to expand in many different directions, and it is still unknown as to where they will venture next.