On Break

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Toon Category: Shorts
watch Compy Catalog Strong Bad Sings
"We're three grown men working in mascot costumes in the dead of summer!"

Three costumed mascots take a break and share their experiences.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Coach Z, Homestar Runner, CGNU Freshmen, Pom Pom, Bubs, Child, The Announcer

Places: The Field, Crazy Go Nuts University, Bubs' Concession Stand, The Athletic Field, Strong Bad's Mount Ridesplace! USA (Easter egg)

Date: Monday, August 24, 2009

Running Time: 2:24

Title: Thinking Mascots Union Local 282

Contents

Transcript

{Short opens with pan down to the field. Cut to a close-up of the Tragic Clown Dog's face. Zoom out to a medium shot of Strong Bad's face visible in open flap of the costume, taking a drag off a white object and exhaling audibly. Coach Z, wearing the Drive-Thru Whale costume, enters screen right.}

COACH Z: Well, hey there, fellow mascot! I didn't know you was the smokin' type?

{cut to a close-up of Strong Bad}

STRONG BAD: {whisperingly} Shh! I'm not! {normally} But Bubs only gives me one of each kind of break. I've already used pee, coffee, and maternity leave today. {beat} And this is a white crayon.

{Cut to a medium shot. Homestar Runner enters screen left, wearing the Jolly Dumple costume.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What is up, my fellow sweat factories?

STRONG BAD: Whoa, I didn't know you were working today.

{Close up of Homestar}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, it's freshman orientation. I'm in charge of orienting them freshly!

{Cut to Homestar in the field with the CGNU tower visible in the back, and silhouettes of freshmen in the front. The words of Homestar's song are show at the bottom of the screen, with a ball bouncing as sings each word.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {singing} You're gonna have to
share a bafroom
with some kid from Alabama
that kinda sucks.
The financial aid office
is closed on Tuesdays
and steer clear of the
beef stroganoff at the
dining hall!

{Close-up of Homestar}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: C! G! N! U! {whispering} And then, and then you guys all say "Me?"

{Cut back to medium shot}

FRESHMEN: {mumbling} No way, no way.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Ah, that's good, that's good. {dancing, quietly} We got spirit!

{Cut back to Homestar and Strong Bad}

STRONG BAD: At least you get college kids! I got little snot-budded little kids messing with my costume all day!

{Pan over to Coach Z}

COACH Z: I used to have that prablem, too, but now I just swallow 'em up and spit 'em out in the ball bath.

{Close-up of Coach Z}

CHILD: Mommy! Mommy! I've gotta pee!

COACH Z: Oops! Looks like I forgot one. They'll be fine for at least a week.

{Cut back to medium shot of all three}

STRONG BAD: Hey, where's Pom Pom, anyway?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, P-squared is not in the union. He doesn't even get a break.

{Cut a low shot of Pom Pom strapped to the roof of Bubs' Concession Stand, with a sign that reads "Right Car. Right Ppice" }

BUBS: What is wrong with you? Attract more customers! {Cut to an inflatable gorilla with glasses behind the Gremlin with a sign that reads "Your text here!"} That gorilla's pulling his own.

{Cut back to a close-up of Homestar}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {sniffing} Man, what is that smell?

{Cut to a shot of all three}

STRONG BAD: Uh, Homestar, we're three grown men working in mascot costumes in the dead of summer! What isn't that smell? {close up of Strong Bad} I can name about forty different odors emanating from this thing right now. There's death, rot, decay—

{Cut to close up of Coach Z}

COACH Z: Damp, moist, kimchi!

{Cut to a close up of Homestar}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {an alarm goes off} Ah! It's time. {shot of all three} Let's do this.

STRONG BAD: {As Homestar and Coach Z walk off} Ugh, not again....

{Cut to a close-up of a speaker on a wooden pole}

THE ANNOUNCER: That's right, ladies and gentlemen! {Cut to a shot of The Announcer in the booth} For your between-inning unjoyment, it's the Bumbling Mascot Race Around The Field!

{Matt and Mike sing "Yakety Sax" while Coach Z, Homestar, and Strong Bad randomly move around a baseball diamond.}

{Cut to the inflatable gorilla with a sign that reads "The Ending Here!"}

MIKE: Does it end different?

MATT: I dunno. Let's do it again.

Easter Eggs

  • Click on the Gorilla's mouth at the end to see an animation of a video game with the mascots running around like they did on the field.
    {A black screen with "GAME START!" appears. Mike and Matt hum video game music, while the mascots run around on platforms and ladders. Eventually, one of the Brothers stops humming. "GAME OVER" flashes on screen.}
    TBC #1: Go longer.
    {the other Brother stops, starts, and stops again}
    TBC #1: No, I mean you stopped longer.
  • Click on the word "Here!" at the end to see Homestar and Coach Z (as Poppy and Stoppy from theme park) have a conversation.
    HOMESTAR RUNNER: Man, these mascot costumes in Strong Bad's imagination are way better than the real-life ones!
    COACH Z: Boy, I'll say! Mine's got a minibar and air conditionin'!
    HOMESTAR RUNNER: My ol' Dumple costume had air conditioning. It conditioned the air to think it smelled like... dead {unintelligable}

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • Kimchi is a Korean pickle made with beef stock, cabbage, and hot peppers, and is known for its distinctive pungent smell.

Remarks

Goofs

  • Pom Pom's sign reads "RIGHT CAR. RIGHT PPICE."

Inside References

Real-World References

  • "Yakety Sax", better known as the theme to The Benny Hill Show is sung while the mascots race around the Athletic Field.
  • The Easter egg activated by clicking the gorilla's mouth is a parody of BurgerTime.

External Links

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