Secret Pages

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A secret page is a page from the Homestar Runner website that is either not linked to from anywhere or has been removed from the site altogether.

Note that sometimes some of the pages don't work. Just try again at a later date.

Contents

Toons

These are Toons or toon-like animations that are not advertised from the site. Some of them are incomplete.

Screenshot Name Description External Links
Toons removed from the website
Marshmallow's Last Stand Strong Bad and Strong Mad steal the star from Homestar Runner's shirt in order to force Homestar and Pom Pom to participate in a tag team wrestling match. This cartoon, which is the first ever full-length Homestar Runner toon made, now has been removed from the site for unknown reasons. Watch the toon (mirror)
View the Flash file (mirror)
A Jumping Jack Contest Strong Bad, Strong Sad, Homestar Runner, Pom Pom, and Bubs enter a jumping jack contest. The person who continually jumps jacks for the longest wins. Strong Bad cheats, of course. Based loosely on the Homestar Runner book, it has since been taken off the site for unknown reasons. You can play a Strong Lib while you wait. Watch the toon (mirror)
View the Flash file (mirror)
If I Ran the Camera A poem of unknown origin relating nothing to any other part of the site. It was on the site for a short period of time but soon taken down once The Brothers Chaps realized that fans had found it. It features a little girl named Astrid Renee and Grandpa Chapman. Watch the toon (mirror)
View the Flash file (mirror)
Super Brave!! A Homestar Runner website update for Feburary 21, 2003. It featured a class full of kids who had each drawn a picture of Homestar Runner. You could move the mouse over the kids and see a little drawing of each of them, that were eventually used for characters appearing during the karaoke songs on strongbad_email.exe DVD #3. On Feburary 24, the update was renamed to "these kids rule". View the flash file (Mirror)

View the flash file (Mirror)
On Main Page (Mirror)
On Main Page (Mirror)

Limozeen Thanksgiving E-Cards Limozeen Thanksgiving E-Cards were made available for Thanksgiving 2003. Three messages from the guys from Limozeen are provided. The recipient of e-card would be sent an email with the URL of the card that was prepared for them.

Although the feature itself has been removed from the site, going to the URL will show you the loading screen used. The font used for "Loading..." is modeled after the Iron Maiden logo.
View the Flash file (loading screen only)
Watch the toon (mirror)
View the Flash file (mirror)
Where the Crap Are We? This toon wasn't ever on the site. It's an animation with Homestar and Strong Bad found in an Easter egg in Macromedia Central. It was also available in a hidden 'toon on the Everything Else, Volume 1 DVD. Watch the toon (mirror)
View the Flash file (mirror)
Secret toons still on the website
Happy T A sign which says "Happy T." You can click on some of the letters to hear characters say stuff relating to the title. It features an Easter egg with Homsar, accessed by clicking on a small spot on the lower right hand corner of the screen. View the Flash file
Processing This is a page which depicts Strong Bad laughing at an e-mail (?), Strong Mad reading a print-out, chewing it then sending it to Strong Bad and The Cheat typing on a computer (not Tangerine Dreams). This page was linked to on Strong Bad's Website. Watch the toon
View the Flash file
Not the 100th Email!!! Never purposefully linked to at any time, this secret page was actually designed to be discovered by people trying to find the 100th Strong Bad Email before it was released. This occurs by typing www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail100.html instead of www.homestarrunner.com/sbemailahundred.html Watch the toon
View the Flash file
Unfinished toons
Sing Along A weird, unfinished sing-along with Homestar Runner and Strong Bad. View the Flash file
Needlepoint A seemingly unfinished small cartoon of Homestar and Strong Bad on a sewn picture, possibly a reference to the one scene in property of ones. It picture features Strong Bad standing in The Field. Homestar Runner walks up in the right, stops next to Strong Bad and opens his mouth, possibly saying "'sup." The text "Get Rid of a Few Things!" appears below. A similar scene briefly appears in From the Vault. Watch the toon
View the Flash file
Alternate versions of toons
Marzipan's Answering Machine This is just Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 1.0, possibly before more versions were planned. It has a few minor differences from the current version. The font is a little different for both the number and the back link, it doesn't have the archive menu, and it goes to the Games Menu when you click BACK. Watch the toon
View the Flash file
The King of Town DVD Secret Commentary This is a secret version of Strong Bad's Commentary for the The King of Town DVD without any visuals. It is identical to the normal version except for the end, where it explains why Strong Bad did the commentary. View the Flash file
Secret Yello Dello Deleted Scene This is the scene from the In Search of the Yello Dello DVD where Strong Bad is talking with Marzipan, but with some odd commentary tacked on the front. Watch the toon
View the Flash file
Old "your friends" This is an alternate version of the email your friends. On it: Strong Bad's mouth isn't visible in the reflection when he sings the email intro. The announcer on the TV Strong Mad is watching doesn't say "Some type of TV show." The background music stops at Strong Sad's scene. Some extra buzz saw blades and a bottle of hot sauce behind Strong Bad are gone in Marzipan's scene. The Cheat doesn't yell at Strong Bad, and Pom Pom does one less turn. Strong Bad isn't holding a bottle of hot sauce in Homsar's scene. At the end, Strong Bad says the word "fans" a little differently. View the Flash file
Fan Costumes A collection of fan submitted Halloween stuff. The original version of Fan Costume Commentary. For some reason, the link is embedded in the source of the Homsar Main Page. The page title is "Check out my new cosplay!", which is Stinkoman's line in 3 Times Halloween Funjob. Watch the toon
View the Flash file

Games

Screenshot Name Description External Links
Old games removed from the games menu.
Lite Brite An older version of the Astro-Lite 2600. It used to be accessible from the Museum, but it was updated when moved to the Handheld Games Menu View the Flash file
Taryn getting kicked Kicking Game A kicking game where you kick a picture repeatedly. It takes 47 kicks to break. The picture is of a girl, Taryn, from Strong Bad's Message Bored, who finally posted a picture of herself after a lot of people begged her to. The Cheat then made this game. View the flash file

Old Navigation

Various old menus for Toons, Games and the like that are no longer actively used on the site.

Screenshot Name Description External Links
Old Toons Menus
Oldest Toons Menu Presumably an old toons menu. The toons.swf file is embedded in his page. However, the swf file is no longer on the site. This text is contained in the page source:
"Kick the Can an ancient homestar cartoon found in the ruins of Pompei the isle of Pom a sweet little story about the big, round, yellow one. Pom-Pom i think is his name. The King of Town The King of Town has lost his crown. No, wait. I mean his sheep. Marshmallow's Last Stand What more is there to life than marshmallows and tag-team wrestling?"
This menu was most likely the earliest one on the site. But since it just stays blank, we'll probably never know. Because it has very few toons, and even has the Isle of Pom according to the source, it probably came before the lava lamp toons menu.
View the menu
Lava Lamp Toons Menu An old toons menu with a lava lamp as a back button. The remote was used in the museum, but with only 1 button. View the Flash file
Telebision Toons Menu An old Toons menu, see its page for details. An earlier version exists without sound, a back button, descriptions and A Jumping Jack Contest. It can be noted that on the old version, both option 6 and option 1 are "The Reddest Radish" View the menu
View the Flash file
View the Flash file of the earlier version
Chinese Food Toons Menu An old Toons menu, possibly related to the fortune cookies game. View the menu
View the Flash file
Old Remote Toons Menu The current toons menu before the remote was updated to have Puppet Stuff and Powered by The Cheat, which were combined into Shorts at the time. It also had Features instead of individual buttons for Strong Bad Email, Teen Girl Squad and Marzipan's Answering Machine. Instead of a scrollbar, the longer lists had flaps and two separate pages that you could move back and forth on. The newest cartoon was Strong Bad is in Jail Cartoon. View the menu (mirror)
Telebision Alternate Toons Menu The same toons menu, but it has a different page name. Instead of "toons.html", it's "tvguide.html". This was the name of the toons menu back before the remote was upgraded. If you click "back" at the end of Meet Marshie, you will be taken here. View the menu
View the Flash File
Old Games Menus
Third Games Menu One of the old game menus, this one features a board game theme. View the Flash file
Old games page Probably an old games page. This text is contained in the page source:
Homestar Talker d a n c i b u s Fortune Cookies marzipan's answering machine hairstyle runner Strong Libs.
Also, stronglibs.html seems to be misspelled as stonglibs.html in another part of the source. It was most likely the Third Games Menu listed above.
View the menu
Original Handheld Games Menu The original version of the Handheld Games Menu, it was upgraded when the Scrolling Shooter Games Menu was released. View the menu (mirror)
View the Flash file (mirror)
Old Strong Bad Email Menus
Broken Tandy Menu An old Strong Bad Email menu that only goes up to gimmicks. It was used as a replacement for the Tandy 400 when it exploded. View the menu (mirror)
View the Flash file
Strong Bad Email Vacation Menu An old Strong Bad Email menu that was presumably used during the email vacation. Click on the post-it note to hear it say "Hey!" then "Dorks!" then "Get offa me!" and finally "You stink!" View the Flash file
Decemberween Email Menu This was the "no new email notice" used during the holidays in 2002. Visit the menu
View the Flash file
Old Strong Bad Email Selection The email selection before the email virus. View Flash file
Broken Compy Menu The email selection page that appeared between virus and animal. The version still on the site lacks the bonus toon it featured when in use. View the official Flash file
View the page with toon included (mirror)
View the Flash file with toon included (mirror)
Old Main Pages
Old Main Page 6 This is an unfinished main page from back in 2000. The "new cartoon!" link goes to A Jorb Well Done, the "another homepage" goes to Main Page 10, the "more messages" link goes to Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 2.0, and the "new toons menu" link goes to the current toons menu. Also, the buttons on the left don't work exactly right. Also note that email is above downloads, instead of below store. The only button with a special effect is "Email", which is the same as the normal main page 6 (except that Strong Bad's mouth doesn't open in surprise). Also, Homestar's mouth will move when you mouse over downloads and store, but he won't say anything. Only downloads actually works. The other buttons won't do anything. View the Flash file
Luau Menu An updated version of the secret Luau main menu. View the Flash file
Old Character Pages
Character Cards This is a small Flash file which contains an old-style picture of each main character on the H*R Website, except for The Poopsmith and Homsar, who weren't main characters at the time. It also shows two characters, Homeschool Winner and The Unguraits, who were later rejected. View the Flash file (mirror)
Yearbook Character Page An old characters page, created circa The Luau. Homsar is not included in the lineup because he was not considered a main character back then. View the menu
View the Flash file
Old Intros
Intro 2 Actually the third Intro made between the first, second, and fourth intros watch "Intro 2"
view the Flash file
Ween Intro The intro that is displayed on Halloween. It always takes you to Main Page 7 "Dead as a Doornail". view the Flash file for "Ween Intro"
Old Loading Screens
Old MLS Loading Screen An old loading screen featuring an old-style Homestar Runner tapping his foot. The animation is taken from the toon Marshmallow's Last Stand and a few other old toons from that time period. Also seen in the parodying email lady...ing. View the Flash file
Old H*R Loading Screen An old loading screen featuring some of Homestar Runner's outline and then the text H*R. A parody of the opening to "Alfred Hitchcock Presents". View the Flash file

Other Animations

Screenshot Name Description External Links
Other Animations
Mattcake Matt Cake A scary cake. Click on the cherry farthest to the left to see a picture of Dennis Franz overlapping Matt's face. View the flash file for Matt Cake
Tirecake and snake Tire Cake A tire with candles. Click on the one fourth from the top (to the right) to see the snake from the Strong Badia flag. View the flash file for Tire Cake
Puppet Background The background used for puppet toons that doesn't take up the whole screen. view the flash file for "Puppet Background"
I am awesomer than you SB Sign A strange Strong Bad sign with Atari Strong Bad waving his hands next to the text "i am awesomer than you" View the flash file for SB Sign
Old No Flash Page An old page telling you that you need to download Flash. No Flash
Alternate Halloween Costumes Costumes for The House That Gave Sucky Treats, except that Coach Z is dressed as a Noid, Pom Pom is the Skipper from Gilligan's Island, and Marzipan is Velma Dinkley. Also, The Cheat is wearing a different shirt than in the final version, and The King of Town is missing his moustache. The only movement is a light on The Poopsmith's costume. View the Flash file for Alternate Halloween Costumes
Alternate Halloween Costumes 2 Similar to the above, but this time, Coach Z and Pom Pom are wearing their final costumes. Marzipan is still dressed as Velma, however, and The Cheat and The King of Town still have the same mistakes as before. Also, the background is red, and Coach Z has moved from behind Strong Sad to in front of him. View the Flash file for Alternate Halloween Costumes 2
Homestar's Yearbook It just says "Homestar's yearbook". Scroll over Homestar to hear him say "Sign My Yearbook! ... but don't use any swears, because my mom reads it." View the flash file for Homestar's Yearbook

Downloads

Screenshot Name Description External Links
Downloads
Stencils Stencils you can print to use on pumpkins. Replaced by Punkin Stencils. view the Flash file
Punkin Stencils These are the later version of the pumpkin stencils above. They are shown on the main pages each year as one of the updates. There is no other link to them from the site. *view the pumpkin stencils
view the Flash file
view the stencils available for Halloween 2004 (mirror)
Wallpaper o' the Week Possibly an old feature, meant for the weekly updates section. The link is embedded in the source of the Homestar Talker. View the page
Strong Bad theme SB Theme A desktop theme for Strong Bad. Download the SB Theme
Wireless Bizness A page that appears to be intended for mobile phones supporting WAP. Has some Strong Bad Emails. (No longer works.) View Wireless Bizness
File:Hstheme.jpg Homestar Runner Desktop Theme A Homestar Runner desktop theme for Windows 98. View the download page for Homestar Runner Desktop Theme
Download the Homestar Runner Desktop Theme
Additional Theme Windows 98 H*R Theme A Homestar Runner desktop theme for Windows 98. This one is broken, and only downloads the theme song. View the flash file for Windows 98 H*R Theme
Download the Windows 98 H*R Theme
Homestar Runner and Strong Bad Screensaver These screensavers can also be gotten by downloading the themes. Download the Screen Saver
Strong Mad Stickers Print out Strong Mad Stickers! The design is based on the André the Giant Has a Posse sticker design. Strong Mad Stickers
Download the ZIP File
Downloads Menu Simply a different name for the downloads menu, but the screen is smaller. Downloads Menu
Wallpapers The wallpaper download page. Wallpapers
MORE TO COME! The page with the AIM buddy icons on it. MORE TO COME!
The Sweet Cuppin' Cakes buddy icons download page From an Easter egg in crazy cartoon. The Sweet Cuppin' Cakes buddy icons download page

Music

Audio files that aren't used on the site.

Name Description External Links
The Cheat is Not Dead A sample of "The Cheat is Not Dead" from Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits. Also found by clicking on CD on the post-it note from the "Working on my CD" email menu. Listen to the song
View the "Working on my CD" email menu (mirror)
Because It's Midnite A sample of "Because It's Midnite" from Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits. Also found by clicking on SB on the post-it from the "Working on my CD" email menu. Listen to the song
View the "Working on my CD" email menu (mirror)
MLS Music This is the music from the old cartoon Marshmallow's Last Stand. It is a loop from the beginning of Beck's Tropicalia. Listen to the song
Oh Yeah Yeah Marzipan's song from the email marzipan. Listen to the song
View the email that it comes from
Renegade Master A sample from the Fatboy Slim remix of Wildchild's Renegade Master that was used for the "Characters" button on Main Page 4 for a while, before being removed to avoid copyright issues. Listen to the song
Fluffy Puff Marshmallows Jingle The Fluffy Puff Marshmallows jingle from Meet Marshie. Listen to the song
View the toon that it comes from
Poop Smoke A remix including Poot Slap and Deep Purple's Smoke on the Water. Download the song
Everybody A constant loop of the "Everybody!" song used in the intro, it was featured in Dancin' Bubs. Sometimes the file is 404'd. Listen to the song
View the intro that it comes from
Play Dancin' Bubs
Techno A sample loop from the email techno, it was featured in Dancin' Bubs. This loop is also used in Main Page 4. Listen to the song
View the email that it comes from
Play Dancin' Bubs
Banjo A music sample from an Easter egg in the email little questions, it was featured in Dancin' Bubs. Listen to the song
View the email that it comes from
Play Dancin' Bubs
Drum N' Bass A loop from Everybody to the Limit; also used in Dancin' Bubs. Listen to the song
View the toon that it comes from
Play Dancin' Bubs

Images

Simple images (not in Flash) that are not linked to on the site.

Screenshot Name Description External Links
Calibos An image of Calibos. Probable reference material for Strong Sad in different town. Calibos
Dennis An animated GIF of various actors named Dennis. The cycle of Dennises is Hopper, Leary, Quaid, and Franz. Dennis
Dennis Franz An animated GIF with various images of Dennis Franz. Dennis Franz
Joker A photo of Cesar Romero as the Joker. Probable reference material for Strong Bad in Halloween Fairstival. Joker
Happily Derranged Cover of the promotional cassette "Happily Deranged", containing 3 songs from the mid '90s Nickelodeon show "The Adventures of Pete & Pete." A larger version of the image is found here. Happily Derranged
Coolbot Appears to be a line drawing of the Visor Robot. Used on "The_Coolest_Stuff_Ever.COM" banner. Coolbot
Cooltitle A banner reading "THE COOLEST STUFF EVER". Used on "The_Coolest_Stuff_Ever.COM" banner. Cooltitle
Image:Homestarstamp.PNG
Email Updates Before The Brothers Chaps started updating weekly, this was how fans knew when to check homestarrunner.com. Yet again, the link is embedded in the source of the Homestar Talker. View the page
Seriously Seriously Homestar Runner parody of the Macintosh Apple logo. Also used as a wallpaper in the wallpapers section of the site, linked to father down on this page. View Seriously
More shirts Shirts Two unreleased shirts; A Waffle House parody shirt and a Jamaican Homestar shirt. View the shirts
The Coolest stuff ever Coolest Stuff Ever Banner A banner which says "THE COOLEST STUFF EVER". Note the title says The_Coolest_Stuff_Ever.COM. The website does not exist though, although a website called The-Coolest-Stuff-Ever.com does exist. View Coolest Stuff Ever
Pom Pom Glossy A cool Pom Pom picture. View Pom Pom Glossy
Strong Bad Glossy A picture of Strong Bad that appears autographed by his "main man" in 2 years. View Strong Bad Glossy
Marzipan Shirts Marzipan shirts that were never used. One features Marzipan on a pink flower silhouette on a white shirt and the other has inverted colors. Both have the text *MARZIPAN* written below her in purple text. In front of both shirts is the text click to change, clicking it changes the shirt to a version with smaller text, then no text, and then back to normal. Below the shirts is the text:
Which do you like best? I think we should get babydolls, mediums, and spaghetti-strap tanktops. and possibly a couple larges or x-larges for fruity guys.
View Marzipan Shirts
Banners and Link Graphics No longer on site, simply some pictures that can be used on your site to link to H*R. Banners and Link Graphics page (mirror).
Halloween Fanstuff 35 pictures of people dressed up as Homestar Runner characters for Halloween. Ween Stuff
Halloween Fanstuff another 5 pictures that link back to the above 35. Ween Stuff

See also

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