Subtitles:sbemail153/en
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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail153.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="24" end="39" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Email is nice,</line>
<line start="39" end="55"><strongbad>habalubabulabada! Email is twice, habilastilbilasaw!</strongbad>
<sfx>geddup noise</sfx></line>
<line start="55" end="86" speaker="strongbad">habalubabulabada! Email is twice, habilastilbilasaw!</line>
<line start="90" end="100" speaker="strongbad">"Dear Strong Bad,"</line>
<line start="100" end="107">
<sfx>echo</sfx>
<strongbad><span style="font-size:0.8em">Strong Bad</span><span style="visibility:hidden">
<span style="font-size:0.6em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.4em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.2em">Strong Bad</span>
</span></strongbad>
</line>
<line start="107" end="114">
<sfx>echo</sfx>
<strongbad><span style="font-size:0.8em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.6em">Strong Bad</span><span style="visibility:hidden">
<span style="font-size:0.4em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.2em">Strong Bad</span>
</span></strongbad>
</line>
<line start="114" end="122">
<sfx>echo</sfx>
<strongbad><span style="font-size:0.8em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.6em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.4em">Strong Bad</span><span style="visibility:hidden">
<span style="font-size:0.2em">Strong Bad</span>
</span></strongbad>
</line>
<line start="122" end="129">
<sfx>echo</sfx>
<strongbad><span style="font-size:0.8em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.6em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.4em">Strong Bad</span>
<span style="font-size:0.2em">Strong Bad</span></strongbad>
</line>
<line start="134" end="180" speaker="strongbad">"Dude, I am getting bored of the "No Loafing" sign and blue paint."</line>
<line start="184" end="219" speaker="strongbad">"Hom-ee-ay, Eric-son, Canada."</line>
<line start="221" end="318" speaker="strongbad">
That's so funny that you should say that <em>(mumbles)</em>, because I was just thinking how bored I am<br /> with your butt, and your face, and your snotty nose.
</line>
<line start="318" end="324">
<sfx>echo</sfx>
<strongbad><span style="font-size:0.8em">nose</span>
<span style="visibility:hidden">
<span style="font-size:0.6em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.4em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.2em">nose</span>
</span></strongbad>
</line>
<line start="324" end="330">
<sfx>echo</sfx>
<strongbad><span style="font-size:0.8em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.6em">nose</span>
<span style="visibility:hidden">
<span style="font-size:0.4em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.2em">nose</span>
</span></strongbad>
</line>
<line start="330" end="338">
<sfx>echo</sfx>
<strongbad><span style="font-size:0.8em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.6em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.4em">nose</span>
<span style="visibility:hidden">
<span style="font-size:0.2em">nose</span>
</span></strongbad>
</line>
<line start="338" end="347">
<sfx>echo</sfx>
<strongbad><span style="font-size:0.8em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.6em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.4em">nose</span>
<span style="font-size:0.2em">nose</span></strongbad>
</line>
<line start="357" end="428" speaker="strongbad">I guess the No Loafing sign could take a cue from the fast-food, soft drink, and bad sports team industries</line>
<line start="428" end="484" speaker="strongbad">and combat sluggish sales and decades of losing with a slick logo redesign.</line>
<line start="489" end="526" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover"><em>(rapping)</em> First you squish it, skew it, and turn it all around.</line>
<line start="526" end="557" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover"><em>(rapping)</em> Squish it, skew it, turn it all around.</line>
<line start="565" end="626" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Then we need to make it fast and slick and shiny like Flo Jo in a tuxedo.</line>
<line start="626" end="659" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover"><em>(rapping)</em> Uh! Flo Jo with da tux-eee-do!</line>
<line start="671" end="712" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Now it's time to play Color Wheeeel Roulette!</line>
<line start="719" end="733" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">No Whammies, no Whammies!</line>
<line start="762" end="775">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">Awww... <span style="visibility:hidden">Ouch, man.</span></strongbad>
<sfx>audience groans</sfx>
</line>
<line start="775" end="789">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">Awww... Ouch, man.</strongbad>
<sfx>audience groans</sfx>
</line>
<line start="789" end="884" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Now, just when you think you're done, you gotta dip it in molten Plexiglas to give it<br /> that "children under three are sure to choke on it" goodness.</line>
<line start="888" end="918" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, wait. Almost forgot the fangs.</line>
<line start="918" end="934" speaker="sfx">Roar!</line>
<line start="938" end="948" speaker="thecheat">The Cheat noises</line>
<line start="948" end="1019" speaker="strongbad">Well, I don't know how we're gonna print it out, seeing as how somebody sliced off the back of your monitor.</line>
<line start="1019" end="1059" speaker="strongbad">And quit rubbing that plastic bar of soap on the desk.</line>
<line start="1059" end="1110" speaker="strongbad">You clearly don't have what it takes to bring NO LOAFING into the digital age.</line>
<line start="1116" end="1136" speaker="strongbad">But I does!</line>
<line start="1137" end="1182" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Fresh from elementary school cafetoriums and lotto machines...</line>
<line start="1182" end="1241" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">...comes one of those actually pretty hard-to-read message board signs.</line>
<line start="1241" end="1313" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Capable of advanced animation, scrollabatonies and twelve levels of blinkiness.</line>
<line start="1314" end="1351" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Now we can celebrate the lack of loafing with some fireworks!</line>
<line start="1354" end="1376" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And a man doing cartwheels!</line>
<line start="1402" end="1464" speaker="strongbad">No mortal would dare loaf under the four-colored dotted digital stare of this bad boy!</line>
<line start="1464" end="1516" speaker="strongbad">Y'know, unless they looked up too late, and the "No" had already scrolled off...</line>
<line start="1516" end="1551" speaker="strongbad">...so they thought that it said, "Do Loafing."</line>
<line start="1551" end="1619" speaker="strongbad">Or maybe, like, Franklin Delano Loafing, our nation's laziest president.</line>
<line start="1635" end="1647" speaker="strongbad">That's enough loaf.</line>
<line start="1650" end="1745" speaker="strongbad">As for the blue wall, if you're gonna repaint anything, you might as well use that magic green screen paint that Hollywood still thinks looks good.</line>
<line start="1748" end="1776" speaker="strongbad">Then the wall can be anything you want!</line>
<line start="1778" end="1831" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Imagine being able to frolic through the bread aisle without leaving the house!</line>
<line start="1841" end="1895" speaker="strongbad">Oh, bread aisle! Warm me with your enriched, bleached bosom!</line>
<line start="1900" end="1932" speaker="strongbad">And please, give me back my sight.</line>
<line start="1932" end="1981" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Or play your favorite video games where the pixels are big as hams!</line>
<line start="1985" end="2014" speaker="strongbad">Vrrrrrrrr! Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Vrrrrrrrrrr!</line>
<line start="2031" end="2053" speaker="strongbad">Watch out for the wet walnuts!</line>
<line start="2073" end="2086" speaker="strongbad">Awwwwwww!</line>
<line start="2093" end="2108" speaker="strongbad">This game sucks.</line>
<line start="2108" end="2138" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">But what green screens are really for...</line>
<line start="2138" end="2162" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">...is battling Claymation!</line>
<line start="2164" end="2224" speaker="strongbad">It'll take more than karate pants to keep me from toilet-papering the temple of the gods!</line>
<line start="2224" end="2274">
<coachz>Hey, Strong Bad! Check it out! I squished it! And skewed it! And turned it all...</coachz>
</line>
<line start="2274" end="2304">
<coachz>...a...round?</coachz>
<strongbad>Aaaaaaaaaaaah!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="2308" end="2331" speaker="strongbad">Aww, forget it, Whay-whay.</line>
<line start="2331" end="2375" speaker="strongbad">If you're so bored with my style, here's a change for ya.</line>
<line start="2383" end="2398" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">No, pan up!</line>
<line start="2403" end="2450" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I've put up this delightful ocean-themed border in the laundry room!</line>
<line start="2450" end="2522" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, and look! I hot-glued some actual shells onto the knobs of the washer and dryer!</line>
<line start="2522" end="2548" speaker="strongbad">All for under fifty bucks!</line>
<line start="2553" end="2625" speaker="strongbad">Well, that's our show. Join us next week when we show you how to knit your own splatter paints!</line>
<line start="2628" end="2652" speaker="strongbad">All for under fifty bucks!</line>
<line start="2669" end="2696" speaker="singers" voiceover="voiceover">Ba-doo ba! Do Daaaah!</line>
<line start="2706" end="2721" speaker="thepaper">Preeeow!</line>
<line start="2725" end="2757" speaker="sfx">purrs</line>
<line start="2757" end="2773" speaker="sfx" volume="1.1">growls</line>
<line start="2773" end="2785" speaker="sfx" volume="1.2">roars</line>
<line start="2785" end="2813" speaker="zemblem">Yorp, yorp, yorp, yorp, yorp!</line>
</transcript>
