Teen Girl Squad Issue 7

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Poor Tompkins

The girls reminisce on when they were toddlers.

Cast (in order of appearance): Cheerleader, So and So, What's Her Face, The Ugly One, Tompkins, Fat Man, Mrs. Commanderson, The Man with the Huge Mouth, Thomas (easter egg), Fightgar (easter egg), Gunhaver (easter egg)

Page Title: Diaper School Grads!



NARRATOR STRONG BAD: Teeny tiny girl squad! Cheerleader {fattycakes}, So and So {Polite and Boring}, What's Her Face {Lice and More!}, The Ugly One! {boy or girl?} and Tompkins.

{Music cuts out}

SO AND SO and THE UGLY ONE: Ooncha, ooncha, one-two-three-cha, leave me alone or I'll tell teach-a. Brush your teeth, comb your hair, I saw Tompkins in his under-where are you going, what are you doing, how do you be so short?


SO AND SO: Two Inch!

THE UGLY ONE: Three Inch!

SO AND SO: Four Inch!

THE UGLY ONE: Um, thats as high as I can count.

{Music comes back on}

WHAT'S HER FACE I can count to G!

CHEERLEADER: That's nothing. I can count to purple backwards!

WHAT'S HER FACE Here comes Tompkins.

TOMPKINS: Listen up, you undapants! Who wants to get hogtied, and pushed down, into, some snakewater?

THE UGLY ONE: Tompkins, how do you be so short?

TOMPKINS: Heck, I'm taller than you.


TOMPKINS: Waaaahh!

{Tompkins runs off. As he is running, various monstrous doodles threaten his life}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: AGGH! GRAGH!...and he died somehow.

{The deceased Tompkins is in three parts on an Olympic Style podium with the caption "Torso takes Silver"}

{Cut back to the four girls}

WHAT'S HER FACE Tompkins crinkled when he walked.

SO AND SO: Poor guy never made it out of training pants.

CHEERLEADER: Whatta you kiddos think of my... VERY OWN CHOCOLATE BAR!!

{Cheerleader whips out a chocolate bar that is covered in grains of something and one ant.}

SO AND SO: Looks like you dropped it in the sand.

CHEERLEADER: No, I just dipped it in salt!

WHAT'S HER FACE That's grosser than gross.

CHEERLEADER: Yeah? Well, my house has a hundred baffrooms!

SO AND SO: You mean your parent's house?

THE UGLY ONE: You mean two baffrooms?


{Large man in a singlet appears, going down the slide}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: {random grunting} squished.

SO AND SO: She led a full life.

WHAT'S HER FACE She led a full stomach.

{Cut to a standard school bell that says "Bill Bellamy" on it.}


The remaining three girls: NAPTIME!!

{Mrs. Commanderson appears in the sky behind them then swoops down to grab the girls.}

THE UGLY ONE: Thanks Mrs. Commander...son.


{Cut to modern times. Girls are standing together. So And So is holding a book: 'Old Photos' and Cheerleader's dress says, "coolier than thou."}

ALL: Look at how much we've grown!

{The Man with the Huge Mouth awaits at the bottom of the screen. The girls are falling towards him.}


Easter Eggs

  • As usual, clicking on the O in "It's over!" shows an egg, this one of Mrs. Commanderson introducing Thomas to the class.
    • {A young Thomas stands next to Mrs. Commanderson wearing a cap, with two books piled next to him.}
MRS. COMMANDERSON: Class, please welcome our new student. He's from foreign lands.
{Cut to What's Her Face.}
WHAT'S HER FACE: {thought bubble} I think I have a chance with this guy.
  • Clicking on the exclamation point in "It's over!" displays Mrs. Commanderson with two of The Cheat Commandos.
    • {Mrs. Commanderson stands with Fightgar and Gunhaver, who is saluting her. The normal Cheat Commandos song plays, but with the lyrics: "Mrs. Commanderson, she's some kind of bird-reptile, and she teaches Pre-K!"}

Fun Facts

  • The paper this comic is drawn on has wider lines and a dotted middle line. It's typically used to assist elementary school children in learning how to draw their alphabet letters.
  • When the comic returns to the grown up TGS, the lines change back to the standard college ruled paper Strong Bad usually draws on.
  • So and So only has a flower on her dress in the introductions.
  • When Mrs. Commanderson is fully on screen, the foot/claw that has The Ugly One in it is white paper style.
  • The title (Diaper School Grads!) may be a reference to i rule and Homestar Quiz.
  • "I think I have a chance with this guy" is a reference to Teen Girl Squad Issue 2.
  • "Bill Bellamy" is an actor and former MTV veejay.
  • Tompkins's "swear" is the word heck which (along with shut up and stupid) many young kids believe are swears.
  • Two prominent building blocks spell "SD." This could be a reference to the "superdeformed" style of anime which features younger, cuter caricatures of popular anime characters.
  • During the segment with the "teeny tiny" TGS, the music is a tinkling bells version of the TGS theme. When the comic returns to the grown up TGS, the music is the usual keyboard version.

External Links

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