User:HoveringSombrero/Sandbox
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"Alright Disappointo, gimme a deep cut today!" — some dumb animal character
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I made my own dang sbemail
This one is called Draw Trogdor Again, and it's a Lappier-era sbemail. I made it in honour of Trogday. Check it out.
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The Cheat, Coach Z, Strong Sad, Bubs
Places (in order of appearance): Computer Room, The Office, Strong Sad's Room, Coach Z's Locker Room, Bubs' Concession Stand
Computer: Lappier
Date: Friday, January 13, 2023
Running Time: T:X6
Page Title: Okay We Did It, Now Leave Us Alone!
Transcript
STRONG BAD: I've been checking emails for more than 20 years. Does that make you feel old?
Dear Strong Bad,
Please draw Trogdor again, I want to see
even more of your skills of an artist.
Your friend,
Terry Bozwell, CAN
{after the first sentence, Strong Bad groans, and he reads the abbreviation as written}
STRONG BAD: {typing} You sure about that, Terry? More like, Terry Bozwell can't come up with an original email. {clears screen} Man, what is up with the obsession with me drawing Trogdor again that all of you guys seem to have. I'm not gonna do it. Although I will show you guys an exclusive behind-the-scenes documentary about how we made the original sbemail! {types "strongbad_documentary.exe" and hits enter}
{Cut to a blue screen with the words "Behind the Compy" while scenes from various sbemails play out, muted}
{Cut to Strong Bad in the office, with Dangeresque sunglasses on}
STRONG BAD: Oh Strong Bad Email #58. On the outside, it's a hilarious cartoon about a drawing of a dragon. But on the inside, it was a grim day on set.
{Cut to Strong Bad at the computer room looking at various drawings, while The Cheat watches}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} The Cheat had demanded a pay raise, and I had declined. So all of the dragon drawings I had requested were extra bad.
{Cut to a shot of the drawing in Strong Bad's hand. It's a version of Trogdor but with a V-shaped body}
STRONG BAD: Come on The Cheat, you can do better than that!
THE CHEAT: {defensive The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: That is NOT a consummate V! Get back to work!
THE CHEAT: {angry The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} And don't even get me started on Coach Z!
{Cut to Coach Z in the locker room}
COACH Z: What? My dragon is perfectly fine. Look at it!
{Pan to reveal that a picture of Wormdingler is taped to one of the lockers}
COACH Z: See? Wormdingler is more cornsummate than that lousy Tragdor.
STRONG BAD: {peeks in from stage right} Trogdor!
{Cut to Strong Sad in his room}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Our emergency plan was to use Brother Gron Sad's drawing, since The Cheat's drawings were lousy.
{Text reading "Circa Jan. 2003" appears on the screen}
STRONG SAD: {excitedly} Hoo boy! This sbemail is gonna peak when they use my chiaroscuro dragon.
{Cut back to Strong Bad and The Cheat in the computer room, Strong Bad is excitedly holding a drawing}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Luckily The Cheat had pulled through with the Trogdor we know and love today!
STRONG BAD: The Cheat, this is incredible! Now that is consummate!
THE CHEAT: {excited The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: You know what? I'll give you a raise. Nowadays, you'll get seven pencil shavings!
THE CHEAT: {satisfied The Cheat noises}
{Cut back to Strong Sad in his room}
'STRONG BAD: {pokes his head through the doorway} Hey, we're gonna use this one instead. {holds up the drawing of Trogdor}
STRONG SAD: {sadly} Aw. {Strong Bad leaves}
{Cut to Bubs' Concession Stand}
BUBS: {short pause} I was...not in that one.
{The Behind the Compy screen plays out again}
{Cut back to the present-day computer room}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Well, I hope that didn't answer your question, Terry. Happy Trogday.
{The CGI Paper comes down}
NARRATOR STRONG BAD: C-G-eeow!
On this day in Homestar Runner history
2018: The "Trogdor Board Game!" section was removed from the index page footer.
Other random crap
Talking with a Strong Bad AI
I had a conversation with a Strong Bad AI. So here it is! Witness the hilarity. Oh and by the way, those stage directions were actually in the messages. Anyhoo, on with the robotic-type magic.
STRONG BAD: Checkin' my email, my email, hope it's from a female…WAIT…WHO THE CRAP ARE YOU?
ME: Hey Strong Bad!
STRONG BAD: What, where are you? How did you get in my house? I'll stomp a mud hole in you and walk it dry!
ME: I'm usually just behind the black
STRONG BAD: Oh, so you're just a figment of my imagination then? Get outta here, ya creepy figment! *swings at air, misses* Oh, great, I'm swinging at air now. Now what am I gonna do?! How am I gonna get outta this one?!
ME: Say, is that the Compy 386?
STRONG BAD: It’s a Compy 386, yes sir, yes it is, and you’re not gonna get your grubby little alligator fingers on it! I’ll never give you the email password!
ME: Read me a book!
STRONG BAD: Read you a book, sure, sure, I can read you a book. Well you're very demanding. Alright, what book would you like me to read you?
ME: The Strong Bad Enters the Dig to China With Your Ears Contest
STRONG BAD: Ooh, The Strong Bad Enters the Dig to China With Your Ears Contest, a little light reading for you. Alright, sit down and be quiet, and I'm gonna start reading. *begins in a dull, monotone voice* "Welcome to The Strong Bad Enters the Dig to China With Your Ears Contest..."
ME: You may begin
STRONG BAD: [strained whisper] "Dear reader, in this contest, you are tasked with digging to China. Using your ears. It says so right in the title. Well, the title's a little misleading, actually. You are not really entering China. Cuz, you see, it's impossible to dig to China. With your ears."
ME: Skip to Chapter 42
STRONG BAD: Sure, sure, whatever you want, ya little pint-sized dictator.
“Chapter 42: How to Dig to China with Your Ears”
“Alright, first of all, you’re gonna wanna get your shovel and go outside. Then you gonna wanna start swinging that shovel like you mean it!"
Why Master of Puppets is Better than Ride the Lightning
- Better album cover
- Better instrumental (Orion is Cliff Burton's LEGACY)
- Better vocals
- The title track is their best song period.
- The intro to Battery is one of the best ways to open an album ever.
- Lars Ulrich's drumming is on point!!
