Where's The Cheat?

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(Fun Facts: Adjusted "Trophy Lights" reference, plus small edit)
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*The Cheat apparently prefers "Trophy Lights" brand cigarettes, in keeping with his trophy obsession seen in [[crazy cartoon]].
*The Cheat apparently prefers "Trophy Lights" brand cigarettes, in keeping with his trophy obsession seen in [[crazy cartoon]].
*The Cheat weighs more than 4 times as much as Pom-Pom.
*The Cheat weighs more than 4 times as much as Pom-Pom.
-
*At the end, when Marzipan holds up the sandwich, it looks like it's Homestar's head.
 
== External Links ==
== External Links ==

Revision as of 03:22, 2 December 2004

"The King's gone mad with power!"

Where's The Cheat?

Strong Bad and his posse can't find The Cheat. Homestar Runner makes Marzipan a sandwich, which she immediately falls in love with and names Homestar Jr..

Cast (in order of appearance): Homestar Runner, Marzipan, Strong Bad, Pom Pom, Strong Mad, Strong Sad, Bubs, Coach Z, The Goblin, The Poopsmith, The King of Town, The Cheat, Homsar

Page Title: Where is the Cheat?

Contents

Transcript

{We begin by looking at a sesame seed bun with mayo being spread over it. Each time the knife passes over it, the credits displayed on the mayo change. "This is a Homestar Runner Cartoon" "Mike, Craig and Matt wrote it" "Matt and Mike made it" "Matt and Missy did the voices" "its called: Where's the Cheat?" We zoom out to see Homestar Runner in Marzipan's kitchen making a veggie burger. He puts green olives on top and sticks them on with toothpicks.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {making sound effects for the olives} Dik! Doing! Dik! Doing! {the sandwich is finished, Homestar lifts it up to marvel at his creation} Hmm! {Homestar walks over to Marzipan who's taking a nap on her couch} Hey stupid, I brought you this stuff! Oh, I mean, I brought you this veggie burger.

{Marzipan gets up from the couch and Homestar hands her the burger.}

MARZIPAN: Oh, thanks, Homestar! {she looks at the burger} Oh! He's just adorable! He's got a little face!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, I thought that was great, too. The olives, um, kinda look like... he has eyes.

MARZIPAN: Little green eyes with red pupils and a big leafy smile? Homestar, I don't think I can eat this. He's just too cute.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Umm... yeah. It's cute and all, but, um, it's not that cute.

MARZIPAN: Oh, yes he is that cute! Aren't you that cute? Aren't you that cute?

{The phone begins to ring. The following dialogue overlaps.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Umm... Marzipan? Um, I think your phone... is ringing. Yeah, definitely your phone's ringing.

MARZIPAN: Yes you are. Yes you are. Oh yes you are. Now do a little smile for me. Do a smile, that's it. That's it. Oh, I like your lettuce.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Um... are you gonna get that?

{Cut to Marzipan's Answering Machine.}

MARZIPAN: {answering machine} Hi, this is Marzipan. Please leave me a message.

{beep}

STRONG BAD: {leaving a message} Oh hey Marzipan. Have you seen The Cheat? Because we can't find him anywhere. Anyways, this is Strong Bad -- uh, ooh, um... {clears throat and starts mimicking Homestar's style of speech, badly} I mean this-this is Homestar Runner. Oh Marzipan... um... I killed Pom Pom! {Cut to the stick; Strong Bad, Pom Pom, and Strong Mad are there. Strong Bad is talking on Pom Pom's cell} Yeah, we're -- we were playing badminton in his yard... and I got mad and I killed him! {cut back to the answering machine} Oh no, I need your help... burying his body... {Strong Bad tries to hold back laughter, cut back to the field} uh, bring some towels... and some garbage bags... uh... this is Homestar... {Strong Bad closes the cell phone and tosses it to Pom Pom} Pom Pom, cell. {Pom Pom's body absorbs the cell phone} BWAHAHAHA! Oh man, that was so great! You guys shoulda heard that man! I pretended to be Homestar, and I said I killed you, Pom Pom! Like, Marzipan's gonna freak out --

STRONG MAD: THE CHEEEEEAAAAT! Huh?

STRONG BAD: Oh, The Cheat? Right, right. Pom Pom, cell again. {Pom Pom, lowers his eyelids in annoyance, bubbles, and gives him the cell again. Strong Bad makes a call, and Strong Sad answers.}

STRONG SAD: Hello?

STRONG BAD: Hey weiner. Is The Cheat over there? Don't you guys play Candyland sometimes or something?

{Cut to Strong Sad's room.}

STRONG SAD: Oh, no. The Cheat and I play Jenga on Tuesdays. Tonight is my night to play --

{Cut back to the stick, you can hear Strong Sad mumbling coming from Pompom's cellphone.}

STRONG BAD: Okay, so The Cheat is not there. Thanks. Bye. {hangs up and tosses the cell to Pom Pom} I mean, where could he be, you know? It's like, what part of "meet us at the stick" didn't he understand? Well, I guess we should go look for him. Come on, guys.

{They all walk off and arrive at Bubs' concession stand. Bubs is going over inventory.}

BUBS: 17... 24... 17... hey you guys! This isn't another shake-down, is it?

STRONG BAD: Naw, man. We're just looking for The Cheat. You seen him?

BUBS: Well, let's see here! {starts going through his inventory checklist} Candy bars, popcorns, ketchup, catsup... {arrives at "cheats... 0"} Uh, nope! I'm fresh outta Cheats.

{Using the veggie-burger as a scene change a la Batman logo in the old Batman show, we go to Marzipan's living room. She's talking to the burger, while Homestar is standing there in a daze, slowly tipping over.}

MARZIPAN: Somebody needs a name! Who needs a name? You need a name, that's who! I think I'll call you Homestar Junior. Homestar Junior! {Homestar falls over} Do a smile for me, Homestar Junior! Who's the cutest, Homestar Junior?

{We have the same logo scene change. We're at the locker room with Strong Bad, Pom Pom, Strong Mad, and Coach Z.}

COACH Z: Sorry, boys! I haven't seen The Chort! Though I have caught him sleepin' in that far locker there from time to time.

{Strong Bad goes up to the locker and opens it up.}

STRONG BAD: Lessee what we got in there... nope, he's not here. Though I see he has been cheating on his New Years Resolution. {pulls out a carton of cigarettes} Though I can't really blame him. You know, because he's The Cheat.

{Strong Mad holds up a signed picture of The Cheat that he gave to Strong Mad. It's signed "To Strong Mad, You are rad! -The Cheat" Strong Mad starts crying.}

STRONG BAD: Don't worry, big guy. We'll cut to a montage. I mean, find The Cheat.

{We cut to a montage. Pom Pom puts up posters of The Cheat, titled "Have You Seen The Cheat???? Ht: 1 ft. 2 in. wt: 18 lbs." He then bounces off. Strong Mad walks through the Halloween area. He approaches a car, and lifts it up, causing it to fly away. The Goblin is sitting underneath.}

STRONG MAD: The Cheat?

{The Goblin starts dancing. We do a logo transition, this time using one of the posters Pom Pom was putting up. We are in Strong Sad's room. He's playing Connect Four.}

STRONG SAD: Okay, your turn.

{Cut to the other side of the table, where Homsar is sitting.}

HOMSAR: Oh no! You shanked my Jengaship!

STRONG SAD: I shanked your Jengaship? We're playing Connect Four!

{Bubs walks in.}

BUBS: Hey you guys! Where The Cheat is at?

STRONG SAD: Oh, I don't know. It's just us two.

HOMSAR: AaAaAaAaAaAaA! Hey Tubbs! I just lost my Jengajam.

BUBS: Don't you talk to me!

{Bubs walks off. Cut to Strongbadia. Strong Bad walks in.}

STRONG BAD: The Cheat? The Cheat! {sighs} How's it going, tire?

{Cut to the Poopsmith and Coach Z near the Poopsmith's pile.}

COACH Z: So you haven't seen him then? {The Poopsmith shakes his head} Okay. So I see you still got your pile of whatsit there.

{The Poopsmith nods. We look over to see the King of Town approaching his grill with a steak.}

THE KING OF TOWN: Doo hoo hoo! Doo dee doo doo doo! Doo hoo hoo hoo! {he lifts the cover of the grill to find The Cheat sleeping there} Oh! That little yellow thing! Wake up!

{Cut back to Coach Z.}

COACH Z: Hey look! The King's gone mad with power! He's gonna eat The Chort! JEEEOOOOORRRHH! {Strong Mad walks up} I got him, Strong Mad!

{Coach Z jumps on top of the King of Town and they struggle. Strong Mad walks up and punches the King of Town, and they both go flying back into the wall of the King's castle. Strong Bad shows up.}

STRONG BAD: Hang on, everybody! The King of Town was not going to eat The Cheat.

COACH Z: Ooh jeeze! Sorry about that, there, Kingy!

{Coach Z and the King of Town walk up to the grill, and Pom Pom arrives from the opposite direction}

STRONG BAD: No, no, no, no. That's where The Cheat lives. That's his house!

COACH Z: Wait a minute! The Chort lives in the King of Town's grill, but you didn't think to check there before now?

STRONG BAD: Uh... well... yeah! I mean, it's a really complicated story. It all started...

{Marzipan arrives with the veggie-burger.}

MARZIPAN: Hey guys! Homestar Junior's talking now!

STRONG BAD: Who?

MARZIPAN: He said, "Put that freakin' sandwich down!"

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {from behind Marzipan} No, it was me!

{Marzipan holds up Homestar Junior so that it blocks Homestar's head from our view, making it look like the sandwich has a body}

MARZIPAN: I know it was, sweetie!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No, it was me! Homestar Runner!

MARZIPAN: You're Homestar Junior, remember?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Would you put that freakin' sandwich down!

MARZIPAN: There, he said it again! I'm so proud of you! Who's the best, Homestar Junior? {she continues to baby-talk Homestar Junior under Homestar's dialogue as the screen slowly fades to black}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Somebody, can I get some help here? Strong Bad? Would someone talk some sense into this woman? King, you wanna eat that sandwich? Somebody eat that sandwich.

{Fade into a commercial for "The Homestar Jr."}

Announcer: Introducing the Homestar Junior. For a limited time only, certain children get prizes. Pay 99 cents.

Fun Facts

  • This is currently the longest 'toon, short, or email on the entire site.This is closely followed by Halloween Fairstival, which is 13 seconds shorter.
  • "Where The Cheat is at?" is a reference to "Where my hat is at?", an old Homestar thing that was "Homestar's World Wide Web Debut".
  • According to the credits, this cartoon was co-written by Craig Zobel.
  • The monster that Strong Mad finds under the Gremlin is The Goblin from "Homestarloween Party".
  • When the The King of Town is walking towards his grill, a flyer for The Cheat is seen stapled to his stone castle wall, which, of course, is impossible.
  • Right before The King of Town comes up when Coach Z is talking to The Poopsmith, Coach Z quickly changes his hand gesture. The animators accidentally left the graphic for his other gesture there for a couple frames.
  • When Coach Z attacks The King of Town, The King of Town's crown flips up on Coach Z's head.
  • The old pop-up menu appears on this cartoon (at the bottom). All the buttons still work. Only this toon, A Jorb Well Done, and the Broken Tandy Menu seem to still have it.
  • The cookie jar in Marzipan's kitchen is modeled after Trivia Time, Pom Pom's dog that never saw the light of day in any cartoons.
  • If you look at Strong Bad's eyes during the cell phone part, one of his eyes is smaller than the other.
  • The cigarettes that Strong Bad finds in The Cheat's locker are a reference to Strong Bad's Message Bored game "The Cheat's Smoking Challenge," in which players try to help The Cheat quit smoking. His addiction is revisited in the Strong Bad E-mail montage.
  • The Cheat apparently prefers "Trophy Lights" brand cigarettes, in keeping with his trophy obsession seen in crazy cartoon.
  • The Cheat weighs more than 4 times as much as Pom-Pom.

External Links

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