Wyrmwood Video

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 17:52, 4 August 2018 by Guybrush20X6 (Talk | contribs)
Jump to: navigation, search
"2018 Consummate Trogdor. Available at Wyrmwood dealers everywhere."

The artisans at Wyrmwood Studios show how a Consummate Tier Trogdor!! The Board Game board is made, while Strong Bad commentates.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad (voiceover), Wyrmwood Narrator

Date: Wednesday, August 1, 2018

Running Time: 3:43



{Video footage of wood carving as calm music plays. Strong Bad reads off words like a commercial, with the words appearing on screen in a very '80s font as he says them}

STRONG BAD: Synergy. Dynamic upstream. Unlock your potential.

WYRMWOOD: The Consummate Tier—

{Upon hearing the new narrator, Strong Bad drops the commercial tone.}

STRONG BAD: Whoa, who's talking?
WYRMWOOD: {talking underneath} an exclusive offering in this campaign—

WYRMWOOD: —from the artisans at Wyrmwood, is a tribute to the enduring majesty that is Trogdor the Burninator.

STRONG BAD: Trogdor? I just assumed from the music that this was a commercial for insurance, or one of them old man medications. {quietly to self} Jibblie.

WYRMWOOD: A true labor of love,—

STRONG BAD: This guy's making some eggs.
WYRMWOOD: {unintelligible} of the gameboard is painstakingly created from a striking combination of woods. Exotic Wenge with Waterfall Bubinga at the center—

STRONG BAD: Yeah, those are made-up names for wood.

{cut to a man leaning in to inspect the progress of a laser cutter}

STRONG BAD: This guy needs to back up off of this laser cutter.

{A close-up on the laser cutter engraving the Trogdor! logo into the wood}

STRONG BAD: All right, that's pretty awesome. Wonder how many... ampu-layers of burnination their laser has.

{Phials marked "JET" and "BRASS" are used to apply detail to the laser etching}

STRONG BAD: We season the mighty Burninator with fresh cracked black pepper, and what is clearly cumin. Or maybe ground mustard.
WYRMWOOD: {continues under Strong Bad, inaudibly}

{A jug pours a thick liquid onto a plank of wood, and then is spread out across the surface with a roller}

STRONG BAD: We dump an entire gallon of Grandma's protien shake on a board, for no reason.

{A man affixes another plank atop the first, then runs it through a saw}

WYRMWOOD: But the Consummate Tier isn't just {unintelligible}. The entire experience is fundamentally different, allowing you to keep the game organized—
STRONG BAD: {imitating the saw noises, then a splatter} Brrrow! Spblt! "Aah, my hand!"

{Cut to a close-up of one of the map tiles, where a hand uses two fingers to show the tile rocking back and forth before flipping it over}

WYRMWOOD: —and easily flip tiles, due to the design of the board itself.

STRONG BAD: Whoa, that's awesome! Go back, go back!

{the video rewinds, returning to the shot of the tile being flipped}

STRONG BAD: Tapple tapple tapple, tipple, flipple! I could watch that all day!

{the video rewinds again}

STRONG BAD: So satisfying. It calms-a my frazzled nerves!

{the video rewinds again}

STRONG BAD: Tapple tapple tapple, tipple, flipple.

{the video rewinds again}

STRONG BAD: {in his soothing voice} And again, breathing out. Tapple tapple tapple, tipple, flipple! That's right, far out.

{The video moves on, showing a laser cutter cutting out the rectangular holes for the game board}

WYRMWOOD: Waterfall Bubinga— {continues under Strong Bad, inaudible}
STRONG BAD: We spent thousands of dollars on this laser cutter, because apparently no one at the office could figure out... rectangles.

{The man finishes cutting the game board and holds it up for the camera}

STRONG BAD: "I made holes!"

{The video continues, showing the board being assembled, and then an electronic sander being used on the Trogdor! logo}

STRONG BAD: Whoa! This guy totally ruined this board, and won't be working here much longer.

{The silver stringing is inlaid by hand into the logo}

WYRMWOOD: Consummate Vs of genuine silver draw your attention right where it belongs: to he who comes in the night.

STRONG BAD: Yes. Now that's what I'm talking about!

{In the video, wood for the frame is cut and fitted together while the music becomes more upbeat}

STRONG BAD: Music swells. So take back your bladder. Control your diet. Get more sleep. Rekindle your romance. All the stuff that happens at the end of these commercials.

WYRMWOOD: You can also use the integrated Lazy Susan—

{Video cuts to a finished game board, with a pair of hands rotating it freely}

WYRMWOOD: —to turninate the board during gameplay.

STRONG BAD: Haha! "Turninate"! I like that, I like that!

{Video begins showing a few small pieces of wood being cut and assembled}

STRONG BAD: No, wait, let's go back!

{Video rewinds again, returning to the board being rotated. A beat starts up, and the video is looped several times as several filters are applied to it.}

STRONG BAD: Turninate! Turninate! {imitating a record scratching on a turntable} Do it, do it, do it, turninate! Wyrmwood and Strong Bad with the turninate!

{The video returns to the compass assembly}

WYRMWOOD: This allows each player to look at the board and inlaid compass with the proper orientation, making following the instructions on each card simple.

STRONG BAD: This is especially helpful for your dumb friends, like that one guy Nathan. And that one lady, Selmy. Eh...

{More silver is inlaid, and the board's surface is polished}

STRONG BAD: Each board is then hand-rubbed with, you guessed it: a-my butt.

{The finished board is displayed for the camera}

STRONG BAD: The 2018 Consummate Trogdor. Available at Wyrmwood dealers everywhere. {speaking more quickly} 6.2% APR, no money down, act now while supplies last, subject to some type of stuff that makes you pay more... money if you didn't pay attention earlier...

Fun Facts

Inside References

See Also

External Links

Personal tools