secret identity
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Strong Bad Email #142 |
|
Chris from Laramie, Wyoming, asks Strong Bad if he has any secret identities. Strong Bad discusses several options.
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The Poopsmith, Homestar Runner, The King of Town, Bubs, Marzipan
Places: Computer Room, ...
Computer: Lappy 486
Date: January 25, 2006
Running Time: 3:42
Contents |
Transcript
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{Strong Bad types "strongbad_email.wad" and presses enter.}
STRONG BAD: Initiate sbemail-refresh damon.
subject: noneDear Strongbad,
Do you have a secret Identity? cause you know that
would be the kinda rockin' cool thing you'd have.
Chris
Laramie, Wy
{Strong Bad sings "Wy" as "why" in a soft high-pitched voice.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Chris, let me be frank. The term "rockin' cool" is so uncool it makes my face hurt.
{clears screen}
STRONG BAD: Okay, now all the "rockin' cool"s are off the screen.
{He shrieks as he realizes what he's typed, and clears the screen again.}
STRONG BAD: They're gone. Those things are vicious. Anyway Frank, I believe your question was about my secret identity. Well, let me ask you this: have you ever seen The Poopsmith and I in the same place at the same time?
{Cut to a wide shot of the computer room. The Poopsmith is standing behind Strong Bad and to his right.}
STRONG BAD: Dun dun DUUUNH! That's right! It is I who dons the crappy orange gloves and shovels—
{The Poopsmith jabs Strong Bad a couple of times with his shovel. Strong Bad stops typing and turns to face him.}
STRONG BAD: What the?! What are you doing here? {shakes his fist a little as he talks} You ruined my scam, man! I was gonna have all of everyone believing that I was you and that the teeming pile of whatsit was really a smoldering pile of money covered in whatsit. How'd you get in here anyways?
{Homestar Runner approaches from the left side of the computer, holding a hamburger.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I let him in. {to The Poopsmith} Here you go. {hands him the hamburger} Oh, {angrily turns to face Strong Bad} and you're out of mayo.
{Homestar and The Poopsmith exit toward the left. Strong Bad turns and addresses the camera.}
STRONG BAD: Is there like a sign on my door that says {makes a sweeping gesture} "Wanted: Everyone I hate. Inquire within"?
{The King of Town approaches from the right side of the computer.}
THE KING OF TOWN: I didn't see one.
{Strong Bad utters some frustrated gibberish and turns back to the computer.}
STRONG BAD: {resumes typing} So apparently I'm not The Poopsmith. But I got lots of secret identities. Lately, I've been using this one: Tip Tappers: Expensive Briefcase Carrier. I use Mr. Tappers when I'm on tour and I want to check into a hotel and not be bothered by legions of fans.
{Cut to Bubs' Concession Stand—make that Bubs' Motor Lodge—at night. On the sign is a neon caricature of Bubs' head with three neon Z's next to it, each of which light up in cascading fashon. Bubs is wearing a nametag and Strong Bad has with him a briefcase. A sign-in book is on the counter.}
BUBS: And what name will this room be under?
STRONG BAD: Uh, Tip Tappers, please. Unless some girl asks what room Strong Bad's in. And she's at least a seven out of ten. Or uh {thinks} six if she's naked.
BUBS: That'll be nine hundred dollars Mr. {clears his throat loudly} Tappers.
{Homestar emerges from behind the building, carrying an empty ice bucket and dressed in a robe, a gold shirt, and pink bunny slippers.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Is there an ice machine around here?
BUBS: Certainly, Mr. Dee Williams.
{Cut back to the Lappy.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} And then there's Vance Mudgeman. I use that identity when I drop in on my secret second family over in Broiter Grove. Ahh, those kids love Daddy Mudgeman.
{Cut to the trailer home. Strong Bad is sitting in a green armchair watching TV. He is wearing a grease-stained wife-beater T-shirt and has a couple of days' growth of beard stubble on his face.}
STRONG BAD:
Easter Eggs
- After Strong Bad says "Laramie.....Why?", click on the phrase to get a book of the same name, written by Beverly and Lem Sportsinterviews
- After Strong Bad types "So apparently I'm not The Poopsmith," click on the phrase to see a picture of the Poopsmith with Strong Bad's head and feet.
- While Strong Bad is checking in to Bubs' Motor Lodge, click on the reservations book to see it up close.
Fun Facts
Trivia
- Bubs' marquee reads:
BUBS' MOTOR LODGE (in small lettering:) FORMERLY BUBSO'S CONCES5ION STAND
- Bubs' nametag reads:
My Name BUBS
- Homestar's shirt reads:
I (heart) TOXIC WASTE
Remarks
- Strong Bad does not type his customary filename (Strongbad_email.exe) to launch his email client.
Inside References
- The room in which Vance Mudgeman is sitting (with the moose lamp and "Born to be Danged" poster) is in a double-wide trailer, first seen in the email portrait.
External Links
- Watch "secret identity"
- View the Flash file for "secret identity"
- forum thread re: "secret identity"
