User:NoMayonnaise

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Nothing much to write home about. I've known and loved HomestarRunner.com since 2003. The first HS cartoon I ever saw was Fluffy Puff Commercial, and after that I was hooked. My favorite character is Homestar. That's about it.

Favorite quotes include:

• Stinkoman: WHAAAT is this? Some sort of a challenge buried in the GROOOUUND??

• Puppet Homestar: That sounds like funny, but it's not.

• Homestar: Um... I don't know what any of that means. But I will make use of your complimentary spit-bucket. Ach-tpoo!

• Homestar: Hey, crapface. Why don't you blow it out your ear?

• Homestar: Yeah. You stay over there.

• Strong Bad: Um, no, from what I can tell, you wear no pants and have blue soles glued to the bottoms of your feet
  Homestar: [shocked] Well, that's simply not true. I have long pants, I wear long pants. I'm a long pants man, long pants, long pants!
  Strong Bad: Okay, calm down. I didn't mean to...
  Homestar: [convulsing on Strong Bad] Long pants, Strong Bad! The longest pants! Everybody, everybody! Longest pants! Long, long, long, long, long, long pants!
  Strong Bad: Ah, that's it! We need to get you some serious clown care, man.
  Homestar: [clearly upset] But I was told long pants! Long pants! They said long pants! Always long pants!
  [He leans in toward Strong Bad]
  Homestar: Long, my pants! Gleaming pants! Glorious pants!
  [after a beat, Homestar zips away, leaving his pants behind]

• Homestar: [crying] Looooong paaaants!
  Marzipan: Awww, there, there, Homestar. It's not so bad. Everyone thinks I'm a broom.
  Homestar: [surprised and upset] You're not a broom?

• Homestar: I say there, monstrosity, do you know the times?

• Strong Bad: Oh The Cheat. Where did we go wrong? It seems only yesterday we were setting fire to Strong Sad's underdrawers.
  Strong Sad: [off screen] That was yesterday!

• Strong Bad: I say there, Homestar, butt's twelve by pies?
  Homestar: Oh, yes, I got Strong Bad to say something stupid!

• Homestar: Oh... I look like... the elephant man.
  Mike: Homestar, you look the way you always do.
  Homestar: ...What are you saying, Mike?

• [Invisible Strong Bad approaches with a stack of swiss cake rolls]
  Homestar: Oh hey, guys.
  [Invisible Strong Bad punches him in the gut]
  Homestar: Owww. Those things are bad for you.

• Homestar: Lies! All lies! Clearly I'm the only one who remembers how it all went down. It was not so long ago that I was in Strong Bad's basement spitting Teddy Grahams all over the place. One of them got stuck to the ceiling.
  Strong Bad: Homestar, shut up! This is about that patch on the couch. It's clearly already on there in your flashback!
  Homestar: Oh, oh, ohhhhh. I thought this week's e-mail was entitled "Teddy Graham Memories."

• Coach Z: I meant to tell you the sock on the head was a nice touch.
  Homestar: [incredulous] I have a sock on my head? GETITOFF GETITOFF GETITOFF GETITOFF GETITOFF GETITOFF GETITOFF GETITOFF.

• Strong Sad: Strong Bad's right. I'm a waste of space.
  Strong Bad: [in background] I said you were a waste of FAT space!

• Homestar: Strong Bad, I don't think you're going to be able to answer your word problem this week. So I'll take one for the team. Two trains enter a tunnel going four miles per hour. At what time do they reach Poughkeepsie?

• [At the Teen Girl Squad's school]
  Intercom: And lunch today will be a breadtangle of pizza. Don't forget the battle of the bands this Friday. Tompkins, point your rear end in the direction of the principal's office.

• [even though Strong Bad hates to hug trees, Homestar has somehow gotten him to hug one]
  Homestar: Keep on huggin' it.
  Strong Bad: How did you get me to do this in the first place?
  Homestar: Hug it! Hug it!
  Strong Bad: And why do I continue to do it?
  Homestar: Keep on huggin' it. Hug it down.
  Strong Bad: I don't even like this tree that much.

• Strong Bad: [having failed to do some push-ups] Maybe I need to start working out.
  Homestar: [dressed as an aerobics instructor] Boy, I'll say you do.
  [he does aerobics]
  Homestar: One, two, and flex your pecs! Give it eight more! And five! Twees it out! C'mon, y'all! Just twees it out!
  Strong Bad: Twees it out?
  Homestar: [showing off his rear] Your buttweesimo! We're gonna mold that twees into the Iron Sheik!
  [He glances toward Strong Bad's "twees" and resumes his aerobics]
  Homestar: Just six more now! Eight and four! Shake it freely, twees it out!
  Strong Bad: Yeah, cool. I'm gonna go ahead and ask that you never say "twees it out" ever again.