User:Safety Dan

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Uh, good day to you Mrs. Pan. This is... Safety Dan over here at the Safety... Squad. Uh, just calling you with some Halloween safety tips. Always remember, when trick-or-treating, to wear all black, and paint your face black, and dye your hair black... all, everything black. If need be, wrap yourself in electrical tape. And walk in the middle the street at all times, and dart quickly into the street and across intersections. Also, we have recently come to find that your house has in no way been targeted for multiple eggings and toilet paperings. So you've got nothing to worry about. Probably just go to your stupid boyfriend's party and, um, no one at all will egg the everloving crap out of your house. Okay. Once again, I'm Safety Dan. Happy Halloween.

(from Marzipan's Halloween Answering Machine)

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