A Death Defying Decemberween

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 08:53, 22 December 2008

Homestar plans to sled down a very steep hill on Decemberween, to Strong Bad's annoyance.

Cast (in order of appearance): Coach Z, Strong Mad, Marzipan, Bubs, Strong Bad, Homestar Runner, The Cheat

Places:

Running Time:

Page title: Hope it's not too...Late!

Transcript

{The title screen appears, with the words "A Death-Defying Decemberween", a helmet, and some holly. Then, we cut to a snow-covered field. Strong Bad enters from the side, carrying some hot chocolate with a few marshmallows inside it.}

STRONG BAD: Hot choco, everyone! Hope it's not too... late! Choco? Late? Chocolate? Huh?

BUBS: What a cut-up!

COACH Z: A real ham!

STRONG MAD: THE '50S!

MARZIPAN: Thanks, Strong Bad! What a wonderful byproduct of your parole!

{She takes a cup. Then, Homestar enters from the side.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {angrily} Pssh! Whatever! That's not death-defying entertainment, Strong Bad!

STRONG BAD: But I wasn't talking about... Hot chocolate, I was—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: That's right! This Decemberween, I, homestarrunner.com, will attempt to sled down... the Steep Deep!

{Cut to a shot of the Steep Deep, a mountain with a slope at an extreme angle}

ALL: {gasp}

COACH Z: The Steep Deep! No one's ever been brave-slash-boneheaded enough to try and conquer that monster!

BUBS: You'll break your face into an unrecognisable clump!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No way, dog! No way, Bubs! My face doesn't know the meaning of "unrecognisable clump"!

STRONG BAD: Well, what about the rest of you?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I'll ask them later. {leans in toward Strong Bad} Just mark your caledars! Pre-game starts at twelve, kickoff's set for 12:30. {leaps into the air} Death-defying entertainment! {"tainment" echoes a few times}

{the scene cuts to the title card, now showing an image of Homestar's jump}

ANNOUNCER: We now return to Homestar Runner's Death-Defying Decemberween Special.

{applause. The scene fades into a set for a decorated home. Homestar stands in front of the piano. He is wearing a jacket and tie, and has a pipe in his mouth. Bubs' arm can be scene through the window, periodically throwing snow}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {takes the pipe out} Oh, hi! I didn't see you come in. {sets the pipe on the piano} Sure is cold out there. Would you like a cup of hot jones? {produces a steamy mug filled with white liquid and red sprinkles and hands it to the viewer's point of view}

AUDIENCE MEMBERS: {offscreen} Oh! Ooh!

MAN: {off screen} Hot what?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: That's better.

{The camera swings around to the side, revealing Coach Z's arm holding the mug, which quickly moves out of the shot}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {begins walking, and a wall calendar comes into view. It reads: December 24 "The D'weeve, yo!"} You know, nothing says "Decemberween" like death-defying entertainment. That's why, this Decemberween I'm going to attempt to sled down the Steep Deep.

AUDIENCE MEMBERS: {collective gasps}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {ducks down, then pops up closer to the camera} I might {unintelligable}. {the audience laughs}

{the doorbell rings}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I wonder who that could be?

{the door swings open, revealing Bubs, who is carrying a cardboard box with a bow on it. The audience laughs and cheers as Bubs waves.}

BUBS: Well, hey, Homestar! You didn't tell me you were having a holiday special over tonight!

{the audience laughs. Homestar and Bubs also fake laughter. Coach Z's arm can now be seen throwing snow outside the window.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Come on in, Bubs. Care to stick around for some soft focus and sparkle filters?

BUBS: I'd love to! {a wreath frames the scene, which goes out of focus and sparkles appear, all accompanied by a small piano chord}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Say, Bubs! Say, Bubs! What's in the package?

BUBS: {walks over to the piano, where Homestar is} Well, open it up!

{Homestar takes the box and opens it, pulling out a small sled}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Gee whiz! {audience oohs and ahhs} A brand new sleddin' board! That's what I needed for the Steep Deep!

BUBS: And I pre-printed an epitaph on there, {camera shows the epitaph on the sled, which reads: "Here Lies Homestar Runner.com Death-Fying Entertainer and Father of Six"} so it can double as a gravestone in case you don't make it! {audience laughs}

{camera zooms in on Homestar, who groans long and loud}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {mouth wiggles} Gulp! {audience laughs}

{cut to the Brothers' Strong's Basement, where Strong Bad and The Cheat are on the couch in front of the TV}

STRONG BAD: What a crock-pot full of smaller crock-pots! I should be the one sitting on a holiday-themed set on a soundstage promoting my upcoming daredevilry! {dejectedly} Stupid conditions of my parole!

THE CHEAT: {leaps off the couch} {The Cheat noises} {begins to walk off}

STRONG BAD: Where d'you think you're going?

THE CHEAT: {explanitory The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: A previous engagement? Since when do you talk like that?

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises} {walks out}

STRONG BAD: {rubs his gloves together} This is very unsuspicious behaviour for The Cheat. Which, of course, makes it very suspicious! As soon as I finish this cup of hot jones, {grabs the mug sitting next to him} I'm gonna find out what he's up to. {Strong Bad slurps noisily from the mug} Oh. That's good jones.

{iris to a shot at the foot of the Steep Deep at night. Strong Bad sneaks in from the left and ducks behind a bush}

STRONG BAD: {peers out from behind the bush} What the crap?

{over-the-shoulder shot from behind Strong Bad, revealing Homestar and The Cheat dumping snow on a mattress}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: All right, The Cheat. {sets shovel down} Now, you're sure no one will see this buried here when I sled down?

THE CHEAT: {affirmative The Cheat noises}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Thanks, man. I own you big time for this one. {begins shoveling again}

{cut back to Strong Bad}

STRONG BAD: So, The Cheat's helping Homestar to cheat, eh? I wonder what would happen without that mattress there... {scratches his chin} Hmm...

{scene fades out}

{record scratch. Scene immediately brightens}

STRONG BAD: Oh, wait. Homestar would probably die! I gotta go move it!

{scene fades out again }

{Another record scratch. Scene immediately brightens again}

STRONG BAD: I was really wondering for a second there.

{scene cuts to the next day, where the crowd is gathered in front of the Steep Deep.}

Fun Facts

Trivia

You can hear one of the audience screaming "Onion Bubs" (From Sbemail Original) when Bubs enters the Tv Show set.

Remarks

• Homestar Runner wears brown pants during his televised Decemberween special.
• Homestar and Marzipan head over to her parents' house at the end.

Inside References

• Homestar Runner and Strong Bad refer to drinking jones, a liquid which resembles milk with red sprinkles on top.

Real-World References

See Also

External Links

• Watch "A Death-Defying Decemberween"
• View the Flash file for "A Death-Defying Decemeberween"
• thread re:A Death-Defying Decemberween