Donut Unto Others
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Toon Category: Shorts |
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Homestar Runner opens his own Donut stand, much to the chagrin of Bubs
Cast (in order of appearance): Homestar Runner, Marzipan, Bubs, The King of Town, Strong Bad
Places: Marzipan's House, Bubs' Concession Stand
Date: Monday, April 6, 2009
Running Time: 3:56
Page Title: Hey There, Doughnut Rush!
Transcript
{Homestar is seen cutting out dough rings in Marzipan's Kitchen. Marzipan Enters}
MARZIPAN: Oh, that's sweet! Are you making me homemade donuts for the 16th anniversary of our 17th breakup?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Um, no. No way. Um, no way. You know how I've always dreamed of being my own boss at the donut factory!
MARZIPAN: No, since when?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Why, just last night! {Homestar appears in his dream wearing a shirt with the Mexican flag on it and only one leg} I dreamt that I was a french long-jump champion with eight wooden legs!
MARZIPAN: And that made you want to start a donut shop?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yes sir! Like I said, It's a boyhood dream of mine. Could you pass me that recipe?
MARZIPAN: {Picks up a small note from the table} There's just this square of TP that says "dog-nut" on it."
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, yeah. That's it. My secret recipe.
MARZIPAN: {Sighs} I'm gonna go talk to anyone else but you.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I honestly wonder how many million donuts I'll sell on my first day? Three? Four? Eight? I've gotta be ready for the 3:09PM donut rush, you know? Ooh, here it comes.
ENTER FROM RIGHT* Angry Bubs
BUBS: Well, helloo Hoomestar.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey there, donut rush. What can I get for you?
BUBS: It's really great to very see you Hoomestar.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Uhhm it's good to see you, too, I guess.
BUBS: I'm delighted you've decided to set up shop about ten feet away from me.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, we could be a conglomerate, like KFC, Taco Bell, Madison Texas Instruments Nasa.
BUBS:Yes. That is a really outstanding ideeeaaaa
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Um, bubs? Are we in a fight?
BUBS: Why you think that? You opened up a competing donut right across the street from me Bubs returns blue again.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: The street?
BUBS: Right across the way from me.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: But I thought you sold questionable medical coverage
BUBS: That was 2 hours s ago. Now I'm in the donut business. How's that coverage working for you, by the way.
Great so far!
BUBS: I gotta go get ready for the big 309PM donut rush when next we meet, 'twil be on the donut field of battle.
BUBS: (singing/marching) dubba dup dup dup dubba dup dup dup
POOF* king of town appears
KING OF TOWN: Ooh. Alright gentlemen, here's how this is gonna go down. I need fried dough so bad it hurts! According to the chatter** i got back from taco bell NASA, we're gonna need in the 3-8 million range to maintain my caloric intake now, commence marketing bombardment.
HOMESTAR RUNNER:
BUBS: Mine's a shipped from a 3rd world country named homa modday, so i can legally print from "HomemAde" on the prepackeged package.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I've got great gumption and an adorable speech impootaboot
BUBS: My name's bubs, I talk hard and fast.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Available in over 57 different varieties!
BUBS: One flavor, over a hundred different names for it
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Marzipan raves "Hey! Get outta my kitchen, you!"
BUBS: Fights cavities! Cleans Teeth! The American Dental Association does not approve of the preceding statements.
KING OF TOWN: Alright alright alright. You both make excellent cases, but I've come to my decision.
STRONG BAD: Health Inspector!
BUBS: (cheese everyone)!
KING OF TOWN: Ooh!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey potential customer, would you like several million donuts?
STRONG BAD: No, I don't want one.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: But do you don't not want one? Hmmm?
STRONG BAD: I'm the health inspector, here to hopefully shut you down. Now rub this swab under your grease trap and bring it back.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yes sir, inspectoree.
STRONG BAD: and.. a little bit of THIS! *kick*
HOMESTAR RUNNER: *ahhhhh my face*
STRONG BAD: ahahahahahaha
HOMESTAR RUNNER: *...my face!!!* Bubs, is this covered by my questionable medical coverage... at least questionably so? Bubs?
BUBS: dooot droot dooba doop doop doop
Fun Facts
Inside References
- Homestar claiming he was a French long-jump champion is another instance of French. The flag he wears in his dream is actually the flag of Mexico.
- Strong Bad smiles in this short.
- The King of Town appears from hammerspace.
- Strong Bad also pulls the F slip out of hammerspace.
What are these inside references to?
If you have an inside reference, you're supposed to put what it's a reference to
FOR EXAMPLE:
When Stron Sad wears an extra big grey suit, it's a reference to David Byrne from Talking Heads in 'Stop Making Sense' Not every little thing is an inside reference.
