Crystal Fortress

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"Unicorns?! Who-who are you?"

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Cast (in order of appearance): They Might Be Giants, Strong Bad

Date: Monday, September 28, 2009

Running Time: 2:09

Page Title: Davey Gets His Due!

Contents

Lyrics

DAVEY: Mmm. French fries.
OTHER GUY: Mmm. Yeah, they're good. Gee, Davey, Strong Bad always seems so hostile. I bet he doesn't even know how much everybody loves him.
DAVEY: Nope, nope. I don't think so either.
OTHER GUY: Nope.
DAVEY: I've written a song I think'll make Strong Bad understand.
OTHER GUY: Oh?
DAVEY: I'm gonna sing it.

DAVEY: Uhh Huh
STRONG BAD: {spoken} I already don't like the sound of this one. Ohh, vomit-inducing! My favorite!
DAVEY: {singing throughout} Come down from your crystal fortress, oh Strong Bad,
STRONG BAD: What?
DAVEY: A unicorn awaits at a rainbow bridge,
STRONG BAD: Unicorns? Wh-who are you?
DAVEY: Her head is bowed and a tiny tear traces these words in the dew.
STRONG BAD: All right, you whiny weasels.

DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: {singing back up vocals throughout} Strong Bad
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress,
STRONG BAD: {singing} Shut up.
OTHER GUY: {simultaneously} Strong Bad
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress.

STRONG BAD: {screamed} Throw me a squeedley guitar!
STRONG BAD: Let me tell ya,
STRONG BAD: You get French fries, and you get French fries, but you don't get French fries,
STRONG BAD: That's right! You get French fries, and you get French fries, but you don't get no French fries,
OTHER GUY: {simultaneously, heavy metal style screaming} You don't get french friiies. You get french friiiiies! They Might be Giiiants, gets no french friiies! Yeeah-ah yeah-ah yeah ah!
STRONG BAD: You get the French fries, and you get the French fries, but you don't get French fries!
STRONG BAD: Ohh!
STRONG BAD: Ahh!

DAVEY: Unchain your trembling hopes and dreams, oh Strong Bad,
STRONG BAD: Awwwwwwww! I thought you were done.
DAVEY: The love you deny is they key that will melt the lock,
STRONG BAD: I'll melt your face!
DAVEY: Our golden shining spirits,
STRONG BAD: Eww!
DAVEY: will all join hands and sing.

DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: No.
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: I'm not coming down from no place.
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress.
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad.
DAVEY: Strong Bad.
STRONG BAD: Shut up... you stupid hippie.

STRONG BAD: {spoken} I'm-a gonna throw a brick at your cellist.

Fun Facts

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