Subtitles:sbemail141/en
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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail141.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="15" end="62" speaker="strongbad">Email, ah ooh, ooh, ooh ah ooh, email.</line>
<line start="69" end="114" speaker="strongbad">"Ding dong, string strong, bing bong, I'm in this death metal band at my school,"</line>
<line start="117" end="154" speaker="strongbad">"and I am in need of some of your expert lyrical advice:"</line>
<line start="160" end="241" speaker="strongbad">"what words sound really cool when you scream 'em at the top of your lungs? Dane Corvallis, Oregon"</line>
<line start="246" end="274" speaker="strongbad">Whoa! You must go to a pretty cool school.</line>
<line start="279" end="341" speaker="strongbad">Most schools just have a marching band or maybe a jazz ensemble.</line>
<line start="348" end="400" speaker="strongbad">But a death metal band? That's extracurriculariffic!</line>
<line start="409" end="464" speaker="strongbad">Now let's see, first, you'd better be ugly, Dane. Or fat.</line>
<line start="470" end="510" speaker="strongbad">The gift of death metal does not smile on the good looking.</line>
<line start="515" end="566" speaker="strongbad">If there's any doubt, go ahead and hot-glue some corn flakes to your face.</line>
<line start="570" end="582" speaker="strongbad">That'll do the trick.</line>
<line start="586" end="654" speaker="strongbad">Now, I'm no geographist, but I don't think Oregon is anywhere near Scandinavia,</line>
<line start="658" end="704" speaker="strongbad">which seems to be the only place left where death metal will get you any chicks.</line>
<line start="715" end="750" speaker="strongbad">As for lyrics, you've got it all wrong!</line>
<line start="756" end="800" speaker="strongbad">Screaming words at the top of your lungs is for people with blond hair.</line>
<line start="806" end="846" speaker="strongbad">Ya know, words like 'tonite,' 'wooh-mon,'</line>
<line start="851" end="884" speaker="strongbad">and the name of any street in L.A. Check it out!</line>
<line start="906" end="988" speaker="larry">Tonight! Wooh-mon! We'll be drivin' down Sepulveda with the t-top down?</line>
<line start="1010" end="1022" speaker="strongbad">Thanks, Larry.</line>
<line start="1024" end="1049" speaker="larry">No prob, Strong Bad. HEY!</line>
<line start="1050" end="1128" speaker="larry">I'm gonna be online later on playing an MMORPG if you wanna join my guild!</line>
<line start="1135" end="1148" speaker="strongbad">Yeah, maybe.</line>
<line start="1150" end="1156" speaker="larry">No, wait!</line>
<line start="1167" end="1228" speaker="strongbad">So for death metal, you want to scream from the bowels of your lungs. The bowels!</line>
<line start="1234" end="1365" speaker="strongbad">Words like, 'decay,' 'deranged,' 'decrepit,' and um, 'delouse.'</line>
<line start="1380" end="1427" speaker="strongbad">In fact, you really can't go wrong with anything that starts with d-e.</line>
<line start="1434" end="1443" speaker="strongbad">'Cept for maybe</line>
<line start="1447" end="1459" speaker="singers">Dentist!</line>
<line start="1463" end="1474" speaker="singers">Jugga jigga wugga!</line>
<line start="1478" end="1490" speaker="singers">Deli-style!</line>
<line start="1493" end="1503" speaker="singers">Jugga jigga wugga!</line>
<line start="1511" end="1545">
<strongbad><em>(in Teen Girl Squad voice)</em> That was Brainkrieg. They got last place.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1553" end="1638" speaker="strongbad">So let's recap: ugly, Nordic, bowels, d-e words. Now all you gotta do is</line>
<line start="1640" end="1654" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">hunch all up on yourself,</line>
<line start="1659" end="1718" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">pretend you're holding a mystical orb in each hand and let the evil flow forth.</line>
<line start="1726" end="1825">
<strongmad>DeVito. DENIRO! DELUISE!</strongmad>
<sfx sfx="sfx">Heavy drum music</sfx>
</line>
<line start="1838" end="1867" speaker="strongbad">Broodle-broodle-broodle blap-biddle-baddle! Broodle-broodle-broodle blap-biddle-blap!</line>
<line start="1870" end="1912" speaker="strongbad">Whoa! Boy, do I ever need a quadruple bass pedal.</line>
<line start="1920" end="1989" speaker="strongbad">And now, let's watch how it all comes together on the Half-Hour Death Metal Dungeon Hour!</line>
<line start="2003" end="2043" speaker="sfx">Bass guitar</line>
<line start="2047" end="2074" speaker="taranchula">Ja, we are Taranchula!</line>
<line start="2079" end="2151" speaker="olaf">You just saw videos from Vinger, Schlaugh-ter and the Winnie Wincent Inwasion.</line>
<line start="2155" end="2190" speaker="mcdoo">Ja, now here's a sneak peek at our new wideo.</line>
<line start="2205" end="2275" speaker="sfx">Heavy metal guitar</line>
<line start="2275" end="2304">
<taranchula voiceover="voiceover">You will submit to the decoupage!</taranchula>
<sfx sfx="sfx">Heavy metal guitar</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2305" end="2322" speaker="sfx">Heavy metal guitar</line>
<line start="2323" end="2370">
<taranchula voiceover="voiceover">The death nail! (Death nail!)</taranchula>
<sfx sfx="sfx">Heavy metal guitar</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2371" end="2395">
<taranchula voiceover="voiceover">Down with the decoupage!</taranchula>
<sfx sfx="sfx">Heavy metal guitar</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2396" end="2421" speaker="sfx">Heavy metal guitar fades</line>
<line start="2426" end="2504" speaker="strongbad">Creeping. Rusty. Meat. Truly the heart and soul of all death metal.</line>
<line start="2512" end="2554" speaker="strongbad">Except, now I feel like I really need to brush my teeth.</line>
<line start="2564" end="2603" speaker="strongbad">Lookin' at all that rust. And beef.</line>
<line start="2613" end="2668" speaker="strongbad">While I'm gone, complete this worksheet I've prepared for you aspiring death metal types.</line>
<line start="2673" end="2706" speaker="strongbad">And, uh, careful with the hot-glue gun, Dane.</line>
<line start="2771" end="2867" speaker="homestar">Uh, hello? Is anybody here? I'm uh, here to try out for the uh, jazz ensemble.</line>
<line start="2887" end="2899" speaker="singers">Deli-style!</line>
<line start="2901" end="2913" speaker="singers">Jugga jigga wugga!</line>
<line start="2916" end="2929" speaker="singers">De La Soul!</line>
<line start="2933" end="2943" speaker="singers">Jugga jigga wugga!</line>
<line start="2947" end="2983" speaker="whatsherface">Cheerleader! Are you here to see Brainkrieg?</line>
<line start="2985" end="3029" speaker="cheerleader">I come for the wuggas, but stay for the jiggy juggas.</line>
<line start="3033" end="3043" speaker="singers" voiceover="voiceover">Jugga jigga wugga!</line>
</transcript>
