Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Marzipan's Answering Machine #14 |
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Cast (in order of appearance): Marzipan, Coach Z, Homestar Runner, Strong Sad, Crack Stuntman, Strong Bad
Places: Marzipan's House, The Field
Release Date: 5 March, 2007
Running Time: 4:06
Page Title: Marzipan's Answering Machine
Contents |
Transcript
Marzipan's Greeting:
MARZIPAN: Aloha, this is Marzipan. I'm lounging on the lanai, enjoying a wheat-grass-tini, in my wheat-grass-kini. Please leave a makamakai-message.
Message 6
COACH Z: Hey, Marzipan, it's Coach Z! Just calling to remind yous that spring shin tryouts are just around the corner. Don't forget to bring your shin-guards and your shin-pads and your shin-protectors and your shin-rub. Don't worry abour shin-balls, we'll provide those, but this'll be your week to bring the shin-snack, so, you know, just bring orange slices or some Cheetos or... Pretty much anything orange works for a good shin-snack. And get ready to scrimmage our bitter rivals, Skins.
Message 5
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey, Marzipan, it's Homestar... and, um... crap! What was I calling you for? I was gonna ask you something about... something. Aw, never mind. If I think of it, I'll call you back. Now give me that beep.
Message 4
STRONG SAD: Uh, Hello? This is the King of April Fool's Day pranks, calling her Majesty, the Queen of April Fool's Day pranks. Remember that time we replaced everybody's toilet paper with 100% post-consumer recycled toilet paper? Nobody knew what hit 'em! Literally, they didn't know that we had done that! So for this year, I was thinking we could make everyone a cinammon-apple crisp, but tell them it's a ginger-apple crumble. I know, I know, I'm so bad! We could get into some serious trouble for this one. In fact, I probably shouldn't even be talking about it on the phone. Uh, uh, slow pitch raquetball? I'd love to play slow pitch raquetball! In fact, that's what this whole conversation's been about. Okay, so long!
Message 3
CRACK STUNTMAN: Hello, Marzipan. THIS is Crack Stuntman. I'm the handsome actor that's handsomely paid to do the voice of Gunhaver (pronounced Gun-Hay-ver) on the Cheat Command-show. As national spokesperson for a charitable wildlife organization, I'm demanding that you stop protesting in our rallies! {Pistols for Pandas poster appears} Pistols for Pandas is a just cause! These are stupid, fat, slow creatures we're talking about. They need all the firepower they can get. Last year alone, the PFP put handguns in the paws of no fewer than 300 underprivledged and unarmed pandas. And what do you care? People like you don't even eat panda! This is Crack Stuntman, signing off. And signing autographs at the North Garden Ridges Hills Mall this Saturday! {sings to the tune of the "Buy all our playsets and toys!" theme} Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-dah!
Message 2
STRONG BAD: {jerkily throughout, as if he's an automated phone robot} Hello, Marzipan. This is Nadine Automated Menu Burger calling from Trusted Financial Institution. To check on the status of an existing gigantic butt, please press or say, "gigantobutt" now. Or, to place a new six foot italian sub in Strong Bad—'s hands, please hang up and do that mess right now. I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. I think you said, "gigantobutt." If this is correct, please press or say, "yes." I'm sorry, I think you said, "yes." If this is correct, please press or say, "total yes." I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Let's start again. To check on the status of an existing butt that's so big it has it's own Congressman, please press or say-
Message 1
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey Marzipan, I remembered what it was! I'm actively sinking in quicksand! So, if you have any vines or roots that you can toss my way, I would be really, really still alive. Now bring that beep back!
Easter Eggs
- After Homestar's second message, click of the answering machine tape:
- {Homestar is in the Field, sitting in the sandbox from stunt double. The sign on the sandbox says "Quicksand"}
- Homestar Runner: {sighs} Somewheres, out theres...
Fun Facts
Real World References
- Crack Stuntman, the celebrity spokesman for Pistols for Pandas, is most likely a reference to Charlton Heston, spokesman for the National Rifle Association.
- Homestar sings the song "Somewhere Out There" from An American Tail but adds Ss to the end of "somewhere" and "there".
External Links
- watch "Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2"
- view the Flash file for "Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2"
- forum thread re: "Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2"
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Version: 1.0 | 2.0 | 3.0 | 4.0 | 5.0 | 6.0 | 7.0 | 8.0 | 9.2 | 10.2 | 11.2 | 12.2 | 13.2 | 14.2 | 15.2 | 16.2 | 17.2 |
