Editing your funeral

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[[Image:Sbemail168.png|thumb|"Shut up, lady!"]]

Strong Bad makes plans for his funeral.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|Homestar Runner}}, {{Film|Marzipan}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}, {{Film|Strong Mad}}, {{Film|Bubs}}, {{Film|Coach Z}}, {{Film|Pom Pom}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[The Field]]

{{Comp|Lappy 486}}

'''Date:''' March 12, 2007

'''Running Time:''' 3:56

'''Page Title:''' Lappy 486

==Transcript==
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Strong Bad, how you gonna check that email with my boxing gloves, with my boxing gloves?

<blockquote class="lappy email">
<div>subject: funeral</div>
Dear Screaming Yellow Strong Bad,<br>
What do you think your funeral would be like?<br>
Sincerely Yours,<br>
Bibendum
</blockquote>

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Oh man, Addendum. My funeral is ''{types "funeral's"}'' going to be off all of the following: the hook, the chain, the charts, the grid, and most importantly, the wagon.

''{clears screen}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' First, I'll have to deal with the most difficult decision a newlydead faces: what to do with my stinking, rotten remains. I don't want to be just lying there surrounded by sweet-smelling flowers and sweat-smelling followers.

''{cut to Strong Bad with his eyes blacked out lying surrounded by flowers in a coffin with the word "COUGHIN'" on the side. Behind him is a person wearing a ducky shirt.}''

'''OLD LADY:''' Oh, he looks so peaceful. 

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{turns his head}'' Shut up, lady! Peaceful is ''not'' how I roll.

''{cut back to the Lappy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' That's why I'm gonna be taxidoimied! Nothing sums up my life's achievements quite like my stuffed corpse suplexing a cougar.

''{cut to a white background. Strong Bad is standing on a log that says "Yosemite National Park" and holding a cougar}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{in a high voice}'' Mrow! ''{normal voice}'' It'll be kept in a place of honor for all the world to want to make out with.

''{scene fades to Marzipan's house. Homestar Runner enters from the right with a brown hat and jacket; he hangs them on the taxidermized Strong Bad.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Marzipan, I'm home!

'''MARZIPAN:''' ''{entering from the left}'' Did you find the DNA evidence?

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Not yet, but I'm getting close!

''{cut back to the Lappy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Well, maybe I'll just preserve myself fetal pig-style in a mason jar filled with the salty tears

''{cut to a jar filled with a liquid looking like water with an obviously dead Strong Bad inside. He has pieces of flesh missing.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' of all the heartbroken private school girls that will pine-uh for me-uh. 

''{cut back to the Lappy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' That way, there'll be something to re-animate once the zombie uprising cometh. In 2046. On March 31st. At 2:03 pm.

''{clears screen}'' 

'''STRONG BAD:''' And while I'm a big fan of the classic ''{sings to the tune of Chopin's funeral march}'' "dunh-dunh-da-dunh-Dunh-da-dunh-da-dunh-da-dunh," my funeral dirge would be written and performed by Taranchula!!

''{cut to the Field. Strong Sad is wearing a black tie and carrying the jar containing Strong Bad's remains. Metal music begins to play.}''

'''TARANCHULA:''' Wo, ho, ho, ho, ho!

''{pan out; Strong Sad and the jar are silhouetted and The Cheat is following behind, whipping Strong Sad with a whip. Strong Mad and Bubs follow The Cheat.}''

'''TARANCHULA:''' ''{singing}'' Put him in a jar! Put him in a jar! Put him in a jar!

''{cut back to the Lappy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Since I'm not very confident in Strong Mad or The Cheat's public speaking abilities, I'll pre-record my own eulogy and have it played back on 5 boomboxes...

''{cut back to the field: five boomboxes, including the [[booOOMbox]] and one made of cardboard, are stacked between two large vases with roses in them.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...stacked on top of each other!

'''STRONG BAD'S VOICE FROM THE BOOMBOXES:''' Greetings, blubbering masses! Pull youselves together! And turn of the snot works! We are gathered here to di&mdash;

''{strange electronic noises}''

'''COACH Z'S VOICE FROM THE BOOMBOXES:''' I hope I'm not recording over anything important! OK, drap it! ''{rhythmically}'' Coach, Z, Coach, Z, 1, 2,

''{cut to Bubs and Coach Z wearing ties and looking sad}''

'''COACH Z'S VOICE FROM THE BOOMBOXES:''' 3, 4,

''{Bubs looks at Coach Z, annoyed. Coach Z begins to dance.}''

'''COACH Z'S VOICE FROM THE BOOMBOXES:''' Coach, Z, Coach, Z, 1, 2&mdash;

''{cut to Homestar Runner in a tuxedo and black propeller cap standing behind a pulpit between two vases of roses.}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{with sad eyes}'' Thank you, Strong Bad. And now, a reading from the book of phone. ''{gets out a phone book and puts it on the pulpit}'' Chapter 16, Pizza Places. Aardvark Pizza. Abraham Lincoln's Pizza Cabin. ''{Turns page}'' Acupuncture and Pizza: ''{voice begins to waver}'' Open late, free delivery! ''{puts phone book back}''. And now, Strong Sad will perform an interpretive dance based on his brother's life.''

''{A gong sounds. Cut to Strong Sad dancing onto the scene wearing a leotard. Sound of shattering glass; some shards of glass fly in from the left. Cut to Strong Bad's corpse, which has broken open the jar. His eyes remain black and his body disfigured. The audience gasps.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{in a distorted, higher voice}'' Sorry, everybody. Funeral's over. Not even death can stop me from stopping my leotarded brother from prancing around in my honor.

''{cut to Strong Sad}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' But you never got to see my chabaronfent!

'''STRONG BAD:''' You keep your chappy thong to yourself, Mister!

''{cut back to the Lappy}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Hordes of locusts and famine got nothing on the sight of Strong Sad dancing interpretively. So, in order to spare the world, I guess I can just never die. Okay! Man, I sure hope the zombies still let me fight on their side. I've got my own tattered jeans and mouthful of grape jelly. Anyone? ''{in smaller text}'' Zombies? ''{in even smaller text}'' Jelly? ''{in yet even smaller text}'' Grapity?

''{[[The Paper]] comes down.}''

==Easter Eggs==
[[Image:Acupuncturepizza.png|thumb|NEEDLE'D!]]
*Click on the phone book after Homestar says "Acupuncture and Pizza" to see an ad for it.
*At the end of the email, click on the word "zombies" (the first occurrence) to see a clip of [[Pom Pom]] and [[Strong Sad]] in their 2046 forms.
:''{Cut to a scene with a future Pom Pom and Strong Sad in a purple room with cardboard boxes and flickering lights. Both are smoking cigars and Pom Pom is wearing an ammo belt.  Strong Sad's arms are muscular and he is covered with scars. The phrase "THE YEAR 2046..." is subtitled onscreen.}''
:'''FUTURE STRONG SAD:''' ''{deep voice}'' Fall back. The zombies have broken through our defenses!
:''{Cut to a pale orange room with Strong Bad standing in front of an open door. Strong Bad has stuck part of a brain on the left side of his head and is wearing ripped denim jeans. As he talks, grape jelly oozes out of his mouth.}''
:'''STRONG BAD:''' BAUGHRG!
:''{Cut back to Strong Sad and Pom Pom.}''
:'''FUTURE STRONG SAD:''' We need to activate the doomsday device. ''{zoom in}'' Get the leotard!
:''{Taranchula is heard singing "Put 'em in a jar!"}''

==Fun Facts==

===Explanations===
*A [[Wikipedia:Suplex|suplex]] is an offensive move often used in professional, olympic, and collegiate wrestling.
*[[Wikipedia:Taxidermy|Taxidermy]] is the practice of preserving dead animals (usually sport game shot by a hunter) by stuffing them full of sand or sawdust to retain their natural posture for display as trophies.
*"Bibendum" is a Latin word meaning (roughly) "drinking." It is seen in one of the basic first-year Latin textbooks in the phrase, "Nunc est bibendum" &mdash; "Now there must be drinking." Bibendum is also the official name of the [[Wikipedia:Michelin|Michelin Man]].

===Trivia===
*When the email was first released, there was no loading screen at the beginning.

===Remarks===
*The letter P is the 16th letter in the English alphabet, hence Chapter 16 being [[Pizza]] places.
*The effect used for zombie Strong Bad's voice when he interrupts Strong Sad's dance is the same one used for Marshie's creepy voice in the easter eggs contained in [[Pumpkin Carve-nival]] and [[candy product]].
*Since 2046 is shown as being quite different from [[20X6]], we know of at least one decade 20X6 ''cannot'' be.
*There is a rip in the mouth of the re-animated, mason jar preserved Strong Bad's mask where flesh is visible which may imply that he has a face underneath his mask.

===Goofs===
*When Strong Bad first talks about preserving his corpse in a jar, the right side of his ribs (from the viewer's perspective) are exposed, but when Strong Sad is carrying the jar before the funeral, the left side of his ribs are exposed instead.  When he breaks out of the jar during the funeral, the right side of his ribs are exposed again.
*In the easter egg, 2046 Strong Sad is seen with scars on his body and no belly button in the beginning long shot.  However, when the shot is close up of Strong Sad, the scars are gone and the belly button is back, exactly like his normal body.

===Inside References===
*This is the fourth email in a row mentioning [[DNA evidence]] and the second in a row mentioning phone books.
*This is another mention of [[How do you type with boxing gloves on?|Strong Bad typing with boxing gloves on]].
*The fat man at Strong Bad's funeral is wearing a [[Duckie Shirt|duckie shirt]].
*The lady commenting on Strong Bad's peacefulness and Strong Bad saying, "Shut up, lady!" is a reference to [[bottom 10]], when a lady with a similar voice commented on the chocolate desserts that were on Strong Bad's bottom 10 list.  Strong Bad told her the same thing: "Shut up, lady!"
*This is another reference to [[Prancing]].
*This is also another reference to [[Smoking]].
*Abraham Lincoln's Pizza Cabin is another mention of [[Presidents]]. Also, Lincoln is famous for having grown up in a one-room log cabin.

===Real-World References===
*[[Wikipedia:Yosemite National Park|Yosemite]] is a national park located in California.
*The classic funeral march Strong Bad sings is part of [[Wikipedia:Frédéric Chopin|Frédéric Chopin]]'s [[Wikipedia:Piano Sonata No. 2 (Chopin)|Piano Sonata No. 2 in B flat minor, op. 35]]. The well-known funeral march is in movement 3 of this piece.
*The funeral procession sequence, featuring Strong Sad carrying Strong Bad in a Mason jar, set to music by Taranchula, is oddly reminiscent of Breaking Benjamin's music video for their hit So Cold.

==External Links==
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{{Strong Bad Email}}