Editing local news

{{sbenav}}
[[Image:minibeast sbemail89.png|thumb|"The World in CRISIS! ...More on that later."]]

Dan asks Strong Bad if Strong Badia has a [[Action Cool 5|local news program]]. Strong Bad rushes off to make one with the help of Bubs, Strong Mad, The Cheat, The Poopsmith, and the Tire.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}, {{Film|Strong Mad}}, {{Film|Homestar Runner}}, {{Film|The King of Town}}, {{Film|Marzipan}}, {{Film|Bubs}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}} (voice only), {{Film|The Poopsmith}}

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[Strong Badia]], [[The Classroom]], [[The Field]], [[Bubs' Concession Stand]]

'''Computer:''' [[Compy 386]]

'''Date:''' Monday, November 17, 2003

'''Running Time:''' 3:05

'''Page Title:''' Compy 386!!

{{dvd|strongbad_email.exe Disc Three}}

== Transcript ==
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{Singing}'' It's email time again! Doot doodle-ooh-doo, doot doodle-ooh-doo, doot doodle-ooh-doo.

''{reading}''

<blockquote class="compy email">Dear Strong Bad, <br />
Does Strong Badia have its' own local<br />
news even?  If so, I hope it's better<br />
than my local news.<br />
<br />
Sincerely,<br />
Dan D. Tallahassee, FL</blockquote>

''{Strong Bad says "Tallaha—... Tasalan—... Gainesville, Florida" instead of "Tallahassee, FL"}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Okay, Dan, I'm only gonna sing this one more time:  ''{singing}'' Ohhhhhhh ''{types while singing}'' If you want it to be possessive, it's just 'I-T-S.' But, if it's supposed to be a contraction then it's 'I-T-apostrophe-S,' ''{Short pause}'' scalawag. ''{stops typing}'' Ahem. Um, ''{Clears screen, resumes typing}'' Of course we've got local news. It's the—It's the greatest. ''{types "It's the" once}''  Um... But I—I have to go now...and...do something...completely unrelated to me...throwing together...the aforementioned local news. ''{types quickly, then runs off}'' Hoight!

''{Strong Bad holds a sign reading "Strong Badia Action Cool News 5" in front of the camera. The Cheat can be heard making noises in the background imitating the musical intros of news shows.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Strong Badia Action Cool News 5!

''{Cut to Strong Bad standing in Strong Badia.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Top Stories with anchorperson Strong Bad!

''{Strong Bad gives a thumbs-up to the camera, as The Cheat holds up an index card reading "Strong Bad with Top Stories." Cut to Strong Mad standing in front of a blackboard holding a football, a tennis racquet, and twirling a cinder block on his left index finger as if it were a basketball.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Strong Mad with the sports!

''{The Cheat holds up an index card reading "Sportscarster Strong Mad". Cut to the Tire with an index card propped up next to it reading "Meteorologist TIRE".}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Local weather with Tire!

''{Cut to The Cheat standing in the field.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' And The Cheat with SkyCheat Traffic!

''{The Cheat grins at the camera and holds up an index card reading "THE FRiGGiN CHEAT" as the SkyCheat logo appears in the lower right-hand corner. Cut to Strong Bad sitting behind a desk situated in front of the fence.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Good evening and tonight. I'm Strong Bad with today's top stories.

''{The Cheat's sound effects fade out. Cut to a side view of the desk. The Cheat holds up a sign saying "World Crisis."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' The World in Crisis!  More on that later.

''{The Cheat withdraws the World Crisis sign, and we switch to a frontal angle of the desk again.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Now let's check in with The Cheat with SkyCheat Traffic.

''{Cut to Strong Mad and The Cheat standing in the field. Strong Mad throws The Cheat high into the air. The Cheat hangs there for a split-second and then falls back and is caught offscreen by Strong Mad. This process repeats over and over. Strong Bad makes helicopter sounds.}''

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{subtitled}'' Thanks Strong Bad... This is The Cheat...with SkyCheat Traffic... There appears to be...some congestion...around Bubs' Concession Stand.

''{cuts to the concession stand. Homestar, Marzipan and the King of Town are standing in line. There is a sign that says "Wait in Line: $5"}''

'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' Best five bucks I ever spent.

''{Cuts back to Strong Bad behind the news desk.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Thank you, The Cheat. I guess those ''roads'' should not be ''rode'' upon, eh?

''{Cut back to The Cheat, who is still being thrown into the air.}''

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{subtitled}'' not funny... i didn't even mention...any roads.

''{Cut back to Strong Bad behind the news desk.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yes, well, thank you, tonight. We'll return to our top story: The World in Crisis.

''{Bubs holds up the "World Crisis" sign. Cut to side angle of the desk again. Bubs is visible for a moment, but he quickly runs away, dropping the sign.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' But first, here's Strong Mad with the sports.

''{Cut to the Classroom. The words "SCORE A POINT" are written on the board. Strong Mad is bouncing a football on the floor with a tennis racquet.}''

'''STRONG MAD:''' I SHOULD WIN! I SHOULD WIN IT!

''{Strong Mad swats the football at the camera.}''

'''STRONG SAD:''' ''{Offscreen}'' Ow!

''{Cut back to Strong Bad behind the news desk.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Well, it looks like our ''eh-sportscaster'' isn't being a very good ''eh-sport'', eh?

''{Cut to The Cheat still being thrown in the air.}''

'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{subtitled}'' pathetic.

''{Cut back to the news desk.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Will the winter weather chill your cheeks?

''{The Poopsmith holds up a sign reading "Winter Weather."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' What's the word, Tire? 

''{Cuts to the tire on a desk with a weather map propped up against the fence. The map slowly slides down and falls off the desk, causing the tire to roll away and fall off the desk itself. Cut back to Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' You heard it, folks. Bundle up, but keep your swimsuit on outside your pants.

''{Cut to side angle of desk}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Tonight folks, and have a great job. Remember to turn in tomorrow for our special investigative report exposé: The World in Crisis.

''{The Cheat's sound effects start up again}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Strong Badia Action Cool News 5: "We're investiga-awesome."

''{The Cheat holds up a sign saying this.  His sound effects fade out.  [[The Paper]] comes down.}''

== Easter Eggs ==
*At the very end, click on the little Trogdor-style beefy arm to bring up Strong Bad's educational CD, "Strong Bad's Rhythm N' Grammar".
#Ohhhhh... If you want it to be possessive,<br>It's just "I-T-S".<br>But if it's supposed to be a contraction,<br>Then it's "I-T-apostrophe-S",<br>Scalawag.
#Whatever happened to capitalization?<br>It used to be so cooool.
#Girl, don't forget to spellcheck<br>Or I'll come to your house and throw a brick through your dad's windshield...<br>Windshield!
#Y-O-U-R...<br>Y-O-U-Apostrophe-R-E...<br>They're as different as night and day.<br>Don't you think that night and day are different?<br>What's wrong with you?
#And I don't care how they spell things on the Internet.<br>When you email me, you spell the whole word out.<br>And I don't care that your cell phone has a camera in it.<br>''{He trails off making bass guitar noises.}''

== Fun Facts ==

===Explanations===
*The Cheat making noises in the background near the beginning is a reference to news programs that play a bit of [[Wikipedia:Morse code|Morse code]] which fades as the anchor starts to speak.
*Strong Bad is likely affecting an exaggerated [[Spanish]] accent in his pronunciation of "sport" and "sportscaster." Because the s+consonant sound does not appear at the beginning of a word in Spanish, native Spanish speakers often have difficulty pronouncing such words and will add a soft e sound to the beginning.

===Trivia===
*This is the first time Homestar mentions anything about [[Best/Worst X bucks I ever spent|best/worst bucks spent]].
*The [[YouTube]] description for this email is "The World in Crisis with Strong Badia Action Cool News 5! Hard hitting journalism! Thank you, tonight."

===Remarks===
*Strong Bad previously misused "its" when he meant "it's" in the email [[techno]].
*When it first cuts to Strong Bad standing in Strong Badia, the sky is oddly pink, but for the rest of the email the sky is gray. This is different from Free Country, USA's usual clear blue sky.
*While listening to the songs in the Easter egg, the clickable area for the X is disabled.
*None of The Cheat's subtitles from "not funny" onward are capitalized (despite the fact that it "used to be so cool", as Strong Bad sings in the Easter egg).

===Goofs===
*When the tire falls off the desk, the crashing noise is heard before the tire actually hits the ground.
*When Strong Bad is standing at the desk at a side angle, the outlines on the desk are different on the front and back.
*While Strong Mad is sportscasting, his right arm's outline appears slightly above his shoulder when he raises his arm.
*On the cover art of Strong Bad's Rhythm N' Grammar, Strong Bad's pant legs have purple highlights, while the pelvic area has dark gray highlights.

===Inside References===
*The arm on the S in the sign is a reference to [[Trogdor]].
*The stained [[index cards]] used to display the titles and names of Strong Bad, Strong Mad, The Cheat, and the Tire are similar to the ones used in [[band names]].
*Strong Mad [[Strong Mad smiling|smiles]] in this email.

===Real-World References===
*This email is from [[Wikipedia:Tallahassee, Florida|Tallahassee, Florida]], but Strong Bad finally says it is from [[Wikipedia:Gainesville, Florida|Gainesville]]. The college athletics teams of these two cities {{--}} the [[Wikipedia:Florida_State_Seminoles|Seminoles]] of [[Wikipedia:Florida State University|Florida State University]] and [[Wikipedia:Florida Gators|Gators]] of [[Wikipedia:University of Florida|University of Florida]], respectively {{--}} are major rivals. [[Matt Chapman]] graduated from Florida State University.
*The "it's email time again" [[Strong Bad Email Intros|email song]] is based on the [[Wikipedia:KISS (band)|KISS]] song "Cold Gin", including part of the guitar solo.
*The rhythm The Cheat does in the Action Cool News 5 intro might be a reference to the intro of the song [[Wikipedia:YYZ (song)|YYZ]] by the Canadian rock band [[Wikipedia:Rush (band)|Rush]]. The frontman of Rush, [[Wikipedia:Geddy Lee]] has been seen wearing a [[Trogdor]] T-shirt at shows.
*Sky Cheat Traffic is a possible reference to Sky Team Traffic on the news station [http://www.wsbtv.com Channel 2 Action News], based in [[The Brothers Chaps]]' hometown of [[Georgia|Atlanta]]. The station also happens to have the call letters [[Wikipedia:WSB-TV|W'''SB''']].

===Fast Forward===
*The [[Action Cool 5]] logo would later be used for the station in [[theme song]] and [[Halloween Hijinks]].
*On March 22, 2020, Strong Bad would [[@StrongBadActual Tweets 2020#1241933290170449920|Tweet a hygiene-themed sequel]] to Rhythm N' Grammar, entitled Strong Bad's Rhythm N' Health.
*On October 27th, 2022, Action Cool News 5 was revisited in the [[Puppet Stuff]] short [[Action Cool News-oween Report]].

== DVD Version ==
*All 5 Grammar songs have been incorporated into one Easter egg which can be accessed by selecting the hidden Strong Bad logo located at the top right of the Strong Badia News splash paper at the end of the video.
*The DVD version features hidden audio commentary. To access it, switch the DVD player's audio language selection while watching.

=== Commentary Transcript ===
('''Commentary by:''' [[Strong Bad]], [[Mike Chapman]])

'''STRONG BAD:''' Greetings, Mike.

'''MIKE:''' Greetings, Strong Bad.

'''STRONG BAD:''' It's nice to see you again here—

'''MIKE:''' Thanks for joining me again.

'''STRONG BAD:''' —in the commentary booth.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah. Can I get you anything?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Uhh... Can you get me something else?

'''MIKE:''' ''{laughs}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Maybe a picnic plate with wine and a baguette?

'''MIKE:''' That's The Che—that's what The Cheat likes.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, that's his favorite.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Can I get him something else?

'''MIKE:''' Heh, 'kay... Um...

'''STRONG BAD:''' So this—I need to really put out this album.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah, Strong Mad's—"Strong ''Bad's'' Rhythm N' Grammar."

'''STRONG BAD:''' My—What are you, my parents? I'm Strong Bad. ''Bad, bad, bad.''

'''MIKE:''' How can I remember? Do you have any, uh, mnemonic devices?

'''STRONG BAD:''' S. B., times three.

'''MIKE:''' Ohh, I get it.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah.

'''MIKE:''' Okay, so, um, em—actually, this email... um... ''{mumbles}'' I don't wanna say that.

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{laughs}'' Okay, something else? Maybe another factoid.

'''MIKE:''' Uh... I like, um... the Strong Badia logo... right there for the news had an arm coming out of it, kinda like Trogdor.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, yeah. Look at how he—that's amazing. Spinning that cinder block... "The friggin' Cheat," man. I like the Skycheat Traffic logo, too.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah, that's good. You guys must have spent some money on that.

'''STRONG BAD:''' ...So, if you're a news... carster... you gotta... you gotta say "tonight" as much as possible.

'''MIKE:''' Mmhmm.

'''STRONG BAD:''' That's what I learned.

'''MIKE:''' Well, you say it a lot in this email.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, you're supposed to. Because you have to remind people, or they'll think it's the afternoon news, and they'll turn it off. Nobody wants to watch that crap.

'''MIKE:''' No, just the evening news.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah. Evening—

'''MIKE:''' "Tonight."

'''STRONG BAD:''' Tonight. The tonight news. We should have called it that. ''{pause}'' ''{referring to Homestar, the King of Town, and Marzipan standing in line at Bubs' Concession Stand}'' Those poor suckers. I mean, look at—you'd think, I mean, the King of Town and Homestar I understand, but Marzipan's usually a little more discerning. A little—

'''MIKE:''' Yeah, she, uh... Maybe she couldn't see that sign.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, and she's just waiting—she wanted a snow cone or something... Yeah. ''{pause}''

''{simultaneously, after newscaster Strong Bad says "Yes. Well, thank you. Tonight."}''

'''MIKE:''' There, he said... There, he did... So, Bubs... Bubs is...

'''STRONG BAD:''' See? Because, see, someone was about to change the channel, they'd be like, "Oh, this is the—this is noonday. I don't want to watch noonday." Oh! Yeah...

'''MIKE:''' So that's where Bubs was. He wasn't at the concession stand because he was helping you with the news. Is he like an intern?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, he's at the station.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah.

'''STRONG BAD:''' He's trying—he's getting some hours. Community service, actually.

'''MIKE:''' Oh. ''{laughs}'' Really? What did he do?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah. I—I'm not supposed to say.

'''MIKE:''' Okay. Oh, and the Poopsmith's helping out now too.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh... See, I actually originally drew a picture of butt cheeks with icicles on 'em, but the network wouldn't let me air it.

'''MIKE:''' I can s—I can imagine.

'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah... ''{pause}'' I, um... ''{After newscaster Strong Bad says "tonight" again}'' ...See? Once again, that was, like, five more viewers—

'''MIKE:''' That doesn't even make any sense.

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{laughs}'' What do you mean?

'''MIKE:''' I mean, you're just saying "tonight".

'''STRONG BAD:''' I s—I kept reiterating that it is tonight!

'''MIKE:''' And you never told us what the World in Crisis was about.

'''STRONG BAD:''' That's to get you to come back ''tomorrow'' night and watch.

===Fun Facts===
*The picnic plate with wine and a baguette being [[The Cheat]]'s favorite is a reference to the [[Powered by The Cheat]] toon "[[New Boots]]".

== External Links ==
{{sbemailextlinks|89|youtube=HOD3iUu4aD0}}

{{Strong Bad Email}}

[[Category:Compy 386 Emails]][[Category:Emails With DVD Commentary]] [[Category:Homestar Runner Original Soundtrack Volume 1]]