Crystal Fortress

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Toon Category: Powered by The Cheat
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"Unicorns?! Who-who are you?"

In this partially-Powered by The Cheat music video, Davey attempts to call Strong Bad from his crystal fortress - but the Rambling Wreck of E-Mail Check has got some countermeasures!

Cast (in order of appearance): Davey, Other Guy/Guitarist, Strong Bad, Unicorn, Haddi-Man kids

Date: Monday, September 28, 2009

Running Time: 2:09

Page Title: Davey Gets His Due!

Contents

Transcript

DAVEY: Mmm. French fries.
OTHER GUY: Mmm. Yeah, they're good. Gee, Davey, Strong Bad always seems so hostile. I bet he doesn't even know how much everybody loves him.
DAVEY: Nope, nope. I don't think so either.
OTHER GUY: Nope.
DAVEY: I've written a song I think'll make Strong Bad understand.
OTHER GUY: Oh?
DAVEY: I'm gonna sing it.

DAVEY: Uhh Huh
STRONG BAD: {spoken} I already don't like the sound of this one. Ohh, vomit-inducing! My favorite!
DAVEY: {singing throughout} Come down from your crystal fortress, oh Strong Bad,
STRONG BAD: What?
DAVEY: A unicorn awaits at a rainbow bridge,
STRONG BAD: Unicorns?! Wh-who are you?
DAVEY: Her head is bowed and a tiny tear traces these words in the dew.
STRONG BAD: All right, you whiny weasels.

DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: {singing back up vocals throughout} Strong Bad
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress,
STRONG BAD: {singing} Shut up.
OTHER GUY: {simultaneously} Strong Bad
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress.

STRONG BAD: {screamed} Throw me a squeedley guitar!
STRONG BAD: Let me tell ya,
STRONG BAD: You get French fries, and you get French fries, but you don't get French fries,
STRONG BAD: That's right! You get French fries, and you get French fries, but you don't get no French fries,
OTHER SINGER: {simultaneously, heavy metal style screaming} You don't get french friiies. You get french friiiiies! They Might be Giiiants, gets no french friiies! Yeeah-ah yeah-ah yeah ah!
STRONG BAD: You get the French fries, and you get the French fries, but you don't get French fries!
STRONG BAD: Ohh!
STRONG BAD: Ahh!

DAVEY: Unchain your trembling hopes and dreams, oh Strong Bad,
STRONG BAD: Awwwwwwww! I thought you were done.
DAVEY: The love you deny is the key that will melt the lock,
STRONG BAD: I'll melt your face!
DAVEY: Our golden shining spirits,
STRONG BAD: Eww!
DAVEY: will all join hands and sing.

DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: No.
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: I'm not coming down from no place.
DAVEY: Please come down from your crystal fortress.
OTHER GUY: Strong Bad.
DAVEY: Strong Bad.
STRONG BAD: Shut up... you stupid hippie.

STRONG BAD: {spoken} I'm-a gonna throw a brick at your cellist.

{A crash is heard, with the sound of a piano being broken}

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • This song comes from They Might Be Giants Podcast 37A, which was released eleven months before this toon. During the podcast, John Flansburgh mentions that the song is "hopefully going to be made into something with Homestar."

Remarks

  • Although Strong Bad says he's "gonna throw a brick at [their] cellist", the instrument that we hear breaking is a piano.

Goofs

  • The girl is the only one of the Haddi-Man kids that does not have a shadow.

Inside References

  • French fries are commonly seen and mentioned throughout the music video.
  • At the end of the email virus Strong Bad says that he doesn't even remembers Davey's name.
  • The guitarist first appeared in for kids, as did the three children.
  • Strong Bad mentions vomit inducing.
  • Strong Bad's comments throughout the song are reminiscent of those in Sensitive to Bees. In both songs, he responds to the first sung line with "What?".
  • Strong Bad says he'll melt the guitarist's face off, something he attempted to do in coloring to Limozeen with his crayons.
  • When Strong Bad is seen on the mountaintop, he is depicted as being really muscular.
  • The pixellated lightning bolts at the beginning of Strong Bad's metal segment are directly imported from the Peasant's Quest title screen.
  • Strong Bad stylized as a "haddiman" kid has ears.
  • Strong Bad threatens to throw a brick, something he also did in Sketchbook (video) and the process.
  • At the beginning of Strong Bad's metal segment, the picture shown in the background is the "Unicorn In Paradise" poster (sans unicorn), which was also seen in his bedroom.
  • Strong Bad smiles briefly while threatening to melt Davey's face.

Real-World References

  • Davey's costume before Strong Bad appears on the mountaintop is based on that of Brunnhilde from Wagner's "Ring" cycle. It is considered an iconic and stereotypical operatic costume.
  • The scene with Strong Bad on the mountaintop spoofs the "Night On Bald Mountain" sequence of the Disney movie, Fantasia, with Strong Bad as Chernabog.
    • It may also be a reference to the introduction of Quest for Glory II: Trial By Fire, since the "Sierra Presents" logo also has a purple colored djinni appearing out from behind a mountain.
  • The line "You get French fries, and you get French fries, but you don't get French fries" may be a reference to the They Might Be Giants song, "Even Numbers" which contains the line, "you like French fries, but you don't like French fries".
    • The above line may also be a reference to Tyra Banks's famous freak out on her show regarding Vaseline[1].

See Also

External Links

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