Editing Dangeresque Roomisode X: Inspection Certificate on File in Building Office Responses

{{incomplete}}
These are all of the responses in [[Dangeresque Roomisode X: Inspection Certificate on File in Building Office]].

{{spoiler}}

==Intro==
:''{Dangeresque Too is standing on top of a building. The camera zooms in, swiveling around him in 3D.}''
:'''NARRATOR:''' High above Brainblow City, Dangeresque Too finishes his nightly vigil...ance. ''{2D close-up}'' Vigil-vigilance.
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Looks like crime's gone to bed for the night. ''{his sunglasses sparkle with a "ding!"}''
:''{Dangeresque Too walks into an elevator, again in 3D.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I'll go in the elevator.
:''{Cut to gameplay. Dangeresque Too is standing in the elevator. A monitor buzzes with static, and a silhouette appears on it.}''
:'''BAD GUY:''' ''{with a low, distorted voice}'' Going down, Dangeresque Too?
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I'd recognize that bad guy voice anywhere! It's a bad guy!
:'''BAD GUY:''' Allow me to put you on the EXPRESS lift! HaHaHaHaHa!!
:''{The elevator plummets. Cut back to the inside.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' ''{rhythmically}'' I better find a way, to stop this runaway, eleva- ''{brief pause}'' tor.

==Elevator==
===Dangeresque Too===
:''{Dangeresque Too spins his propeller cap and makes a whirring sound.}''

====Brolly &rarr; Dangeresque Too====
:''{In the elevator, while it's still falling}''
:''{Dangeresque Too opens the brolly and holds it up, then closes it.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Huh. I guess that won't slow me down inside the elevator. Always worked when I was a kid jumpin off the shed.
:{{short hr}}
:''{In the hatch, while the elevator is falling}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Yeah! I'll open this thing up and it'll slow us right down!
:''{He opens the brolly and flies upward as the elevator falls and explodes. Cut back to Dangeresque Too as he floats down.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' It totally worked!
:''{The brolly stops moving.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Right?
:''{The brolly collapses, sending Dangeresque Too plummeting down the elevator shaft. He explodes at the bottom. Game over.}''
:{{short hr}}
:''{After the elevator has stopped}''
:''{Dangeresque Too opens the brolly, then closes it.}''

====Cuppa Ice &rarr; Dangeresque Too====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I daren't go a chomping. This ice looks hard as diamonds.

====Keycard &rarr; Dangeresque Too====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' There's no room number on it. Guess I'll just have to try it out somewheres.

====Bib &rarr; Dangeresque Too====
:''{If the bib does not have coffee on it}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Maybe this'll help me NOT match those guards' description. ''{puts it on}'' Aw man! Whoever ate this was messy in exactly the shape of a star! It still looks like I'm wearing a dang ol' star shirt! ''{puts it away}''
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the bib has coffee on it}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' There we go! This messy bib may look and smell like coffee barf, but at least it hides my star shirt!

====Kid Meal &rarr; Dangeresque Too====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' ''{puts on bag}'' Aw man! My propeller poked through! But it still horrifyingly covers up my cool shades. I'll wait to wear until I have all the pieces of my threesguise. ''{puts it away}''

====Hat &rarr; Dangeresque Too====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' This covers up my propeller cap real nice. Grammaw nice. I'll wait until I have my full threesguise to put it on. ''{puts it away}''

====Any disguise piece &rarr; Dangeresque Too====
:''{When all three items are acquired}''
:''{Not in the lobby}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I think I have all that I need to conceal my identity! I should prolly head to the lobby. Prolly lobby.
:{{short hr}}
:''{In the lobby, the [[#Ending|ending]] plays}''

====Any other item &rarr; Dangeresque Too====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That's not gonna help me threesguise my appearance from those guys. Threesguise guys.

===Brolly===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Prolly somebody left their brolly. Prolly brolly. ''{takes it}''

===Ceiling Tile===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Looks like an access panel. I could prolly jump up there, but I need to get it open first.

====Brolly &rarr; Ceiling Tile====
:''{Dangersesque Too pokes the ceiling tile, exposing a hole in the ceiling.}''

===Open Tile===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' ''{unsubtitled}'' Doing!
:''{Dangeresque Too leaps up into the elevator shaft.}''

====Brolly &rarr; Open Tile====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I already got it open. I can just doing-jump up there.

====Any other item &rarr; Open Tile====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't need to chuck nothin up there.

===Buttons===
:''{First time only, when the elevator is falling}''
:''{Cut to the button panel.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' These buddins have been tampered with! I'm pretty sure I'm headed for the ground floor no matter what I press at this point.
:''{Cut away from the panel.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I shouldn't mess with these until I've stopped the elevator!
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I shouldn't mess with these until I've stopped the elevator!
:{{short hr}}
:''{First time only, after the elevator has been stopped}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Only some of the buddins still work. And who knows what floor they'll take me to.
:''{Cut to the button panel. There are eight buttons, but only four are functional.}''

====Any item &rarr; Buttons====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't think anything I use is gonna fix these buddins.

===Poster===
:''{First time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' It's the menu for room service.
:{{short hr}}
:''{Cut to the poster.}''

====Menu Item====
:''{First time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' "The Romantic Dinner for Teux. Steak with green shreds. Bubbly Champlain and a rose for rose-mance."
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I was really hopin that was egg nog in those glasses.

====More on Back====
:''{When the glass is not cut}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' It says there's more on the back but that innocent menu is trapped inside this infernal glass frame!
:{{short hr}}
:''{When the glass is cut, first time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' You're free now, Room Service Menu! Free to be flipped over!
:''{The menu flips to reveal the backside.}''

====Kid Meal====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' The Upside-Down Clown Kid Meal. *Limit one per kidstomer. No sharing fries. Or ketchup. Or joy.
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That clown face is Marshie levels of disturbing.
:'''CLOWN FACE:''' ''{Marshie's voice}'' You ain't kiddin, Hardcastle!

====Messy Ol' Ribs====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' "Messy ol' ribs. Half rack. Full problems. Bib included."
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Kinda looks like a pan flute. ''{singing}'' Poooot-poot-poot-poooooot. Pan flute.

====Brolly &rarr; Poster====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That poster's behind impact-proof glass and the tip o' this brolly isn't sharp enough to cut through it, laddie.

====Washer &rarr; Poster====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That will just make an ear-crawling, skin-curdling screech. So let's hear it! ''{scratches the washer on the glass, making a high-pitched noise}''

====Diamond &rarr; Poster====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Let's see if this diamond will cut through that glass frame.
:''{Dangeresque Too uses the diamond to cut the glass. The glass cracks and shatters.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Bowlegged!

====Flower &rarr; Poster====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' GET FLORAL! Nope. Nothin.

====Any other item &rarr; Poster====
:''{If the poster is behind glass}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That won't help me free this innocent advertisement from its glass prison!
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the glass is broken}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I already gave this valiant young menu its freedoms.

==Shaft==

===Emergency Brake===
:''{If the brolly is not hooked onto the hatch}''
:''{Dangeresque Too pulls the lever. Sparks fly out of it.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That slowed it down a little, but didn't stop it! I gotta find a way to slow us down even more!
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the brake is activated}''
:''{Dangeresque Too pulls the lever back.}''
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the brolly is hooked onto the hatch}''
:''{Dangeresque Too pulls the lever, slowing the elevator to a stop. There is a toolbox in a cubby in the back wall.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' ''{taking brolly}'' Phew! That was close. Now I can get back down to the lobby and scramconnoiter out of here.

====Any item &rarr; Emergency Brake====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I'm not doin it.

===Hatch===
:''{Dangeresque Too closes the hatch. It is now labeled "Handle".}''

====Brolly &rarr; Hatch====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' There's nothing to hook the brolly onto.

===Handle===
:''Dangeresque Too opens the hatch. It is now labeled "Hatch".}''

====Brolly &rarr; Handle====
:''{If the emergency brake isn't pulled}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That slowed things down a little. But there's still a good deal of "plummet to my death" happening.
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the emergency brake is pulled}''
:''{The umbrella opens, slowing the elevator to a stop. There is a toolbox in a cubby in the back wall.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' ''{taking brolly}'' Phew! That was close. Now I can get back down to the lobby and scramconnoiter out of here.

===Back Inside===
:''{Dangeresque jumps back down into the elevator.}''

====Any item &rarr; Back Inside====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't need to drop it down, drop it down.

==Shaft (Lobby)==
===Toolbox===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Some ol' toolbox. Or maybe a lunchbox? ''{opens it}'' Definitely toolbox. There was just this metal washer inside. ''{takes the washer}'' Which I guess could be somebody's lunch... ''{dramatic close-up}'' IF YOU'RE A ROBOT!!

====Any item &rarr; Toolbox====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't need to put anything in there. I should see if I can take somethin out.

===Keycard===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That's where that thing that Dagger Skew dropped landed! That great orange thing!

====Brolly &rarr; Keycard====
:''{Dangeresque Too knocks down the keycard.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' It's a room keycard!

====Any other item &rarr; Keycard====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That's not gonna help me get that thin line of orange and black pixels down there.

==Shaft (Floor 7 1/2)==
:''{First time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Oh good. They can't see me up here either.

===Guy's Head===
:'''MAN:''' Elevator's stuck again. Y'ever wonder if there's like a tiny floor between the floors?
:'''WOMAN:''' No. I have a medical condition where I'm physically unable to wonder.
:'''MAN:''' Can you at least ponder?
:'''WOMAN:''' Ponder? What've I got to ponder?
:{{short hr}}
:'''MAN:''' So how long you been working for our mysterious bad guy employer?
:'''WOMAN:''' Not long. I got the job through MoidaPro Henchman Placement Services. I just love a good hench!
:'''MAN:''' MoidaPro, eh? I use Staffin' 'n' Stabbin'.
:{{short hr}}
:''{Following the man's first line, first time after putting the flower on the lady's hat}''
:'''WOMAN:''' I'm currently wondering what is going on with my hat! It's itchy and making my forehead break out!
:'''MAN:''' It's too bad I don't want or need a hat. I guess you'll just have to stand there and turn all red and puffy.
:'''WOMAN:''' Yes, I suppose it's the only way.
:{{short hr}}
:''{Following the man's first line, if the flower is on the lady's hat}''
:'''WOMAN:''' No time for idle chit-chat! I need to get rid of this hat!
:'''MAN:''' Wish I could help.
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the coffee is dripping from the floor above}''
:'''MAN:''' Ugh! This coffee drippin on my head sucks! Wish I had a hat.
:'''WOMAN:''' Well, you can have my hat. It's giving me an allergic reaction all of a sudden.
:'''MAN:''' Oh wow! Thanks lady!
:{{short hr}}
:''{After he puts on the hat}''
:'''MAN:''' Aah. That's so much better. Now the coffee's just watering the flowers! Everybody wins!
:{{short hr}}
:''{If Dangeresque Too has taken the hat}''
:'''MAN:''' I guess I'll just let this coffee drip slowly bore a hole through my skull.
:'''WOMAN:''' That sounds like a good plan, dear.

====Any item &rarr; Guy's Head====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Naw, I don't wanna risk alerting him to my presence.

===Lady with Hat===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Ooh, that hat would make a perfect threesguise component!
:''{Dangeresque Too tries to take it}''
:'''WOMAN:''' Ahh! Salmon and aspic! I think my hand just self-fidgeted!
:'''MAN:''' Uh, I'm gonna leave that one alone.
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Gotta find another way to get it.
:{{short hr}}
:'''WOMAN:''' How long are we going to have to wait here? I wanna murder that nice young private eye.
:''{First time only, if coffee is not dripping from the floor above}''
:'''MAN:''' I dunno. But I heard the stairs were burned down by termites. So it looks like we're gonna have to WAIT.
:''{If the coffee is dripping from the floor above}''
:'''MAN:''' I hope it's soon! This coffee drippin on my head sucks! Wish I had a hat.
:'''WOMAN:''' If my hat weren't so comfortable I'd let you borrow it.
:'''MAN:''' Yeah, I get it. Too bad I can't be bothered to move a few inches to the left or right.
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the flower is on the hat}''
:'''WOMAN:''' Augh! My hat's gotten itchy all of the sudden! Like I'm having an allergic reaction!
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the lady has removed her hat}''
:'''WOMAN:''' Well, everything is now so great. The end.
:{{short hr}}
:''{If Dangeresque Too has taken the hat}''
:'''WOMAN:''' I hope the elevator starts working again soon. I'd like to murder Dangeresque Too before my Garden Club meeting. The ladies will be all agog! Agog at the murder!
:{{short hr}}
:'''WOMAN:''' Let's not talk for a while.
:{{short hr}}
:'''WOMAN:''' Tri-fold board. There, I finally said it!

====Flower &rarr; Lady with Hat====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Let's add some real flora to this plastic mastery. ''{places the rose}''
:'''WOMAN:''' Augh! My hat's gotten itchy all of the sudden! Like I'm having an allergic reaction!
:''{If coffee is not dripping on the man's head}''
:'''MAN:''' It's too bad I don't want or need a hat. I guess you'll just have to stand there and turn all red and puffy.
:'''WOMAN:''' Yes, I suppose it's the only way.
:''{If coffee is dripping on the man's head}''
:'''MAN:''' I'll take that hat off your hands. I could use it to block this coffee drip!
:'''WOMAN:''' Oh, you're a life saver. Thank you dear!
:''{She takes off the hat and puts it on the man's head.}''
:'''MAN:''' Aah. That's so much better. Now the coffee's just watering the flowers! Everybody wins!

====Any other item &rarr; Lady with Hat====
:''{If she's wearing a hat}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't wanna put that on her hat!
:{{short hr}}
:''{If she's not wearing a hat}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't want her to notice me!

==Shaft (Vending)==
===Callbox===
:''{First time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' An emergency callbox! They'll be able to help me!
:'''ROOM SERVICE:''' Room Service. How may I help you?
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' There are armed guards trying to kill me and the elevator's all messed up! Send help!
:'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry sir, this line is just for room service. May I take your order?
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Why is there a room service callbox in the elevator shaft?!
:'''ROOM SERVICE:''' We get a lot of hungry spies and action heroes in this hotel, sir. There's also a callbox in the ventilation ducts. Should you have to crawl through those. Now may I take your order?
:''{A menu appears}''
:{{short hr}}
:''{If not all items have been ordered}''
:'''ROOM SERVICE:''' Room Service. May I take your order?
::''{Um...}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' How bout an every order of food dog and a manilla cheescoke?
::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry sir, you have to order off the menu.
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Yes, I'd like twelve please.
::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry, twelve what?
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Of them. I'd like twelve of them.
::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm going to need an actual menu item.
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' 3 bottles of your most requisite Charmande J'eupronde please vou plais.
::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry sir, we do not accept pretend French.
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Joke joke joke.
::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' Order off the menu.
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Can I get 10-12 of those fat little ketchup bottles?
::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' Maybe. IF YOU ORDER OFF THE FREAKING MENU!
::{{short hr}}
::''{Romance Dinner}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Uh yes, I'd like the Romantic Dinner with Steak and Green Item.
::{{short hr}}
::''{If Poster was checked, Messy Ol' Ribs and Kid Meal becomes available.}''
::''{Messy Ol' Ribs}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Lemme get the Messy ol' Ribs please.
::{{short hr}}
::''{Kid Meal}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I want the Kid Meal! For a singular kid!
::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' Our most popular item.
::{{short hr}}
::''{If food is picked, continues below}''
::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' Very good, sir. What's the room number?
::''{If the Penthouse was not identified, a menu appears}''
:::''{Umm...}''
:::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Uh, can't you just like triungulate my bluetooths or something? ''{not subtitled}'' Locate me that way?
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry sir, I'm going to need an actual room number.
:::{{short hr}}
:::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Can you deliver it to the "Business Center?" Y'know that sad little alcove that just has an ancient deskjet and a CAT 1 cable?
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry sir, I'm going to need an actual room number.
:::{{short hr}}
:::''{Vending}''
:::''{When ordering the Romance Dinner}''
:::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Uh, just leave it by the vending machines how bout?
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' You want the Romance Dinner Package delivered to the vending machines?
:::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Yeah! It's where me and my spousetype first met. She was getting ice when I burned two of my eyeballs with hot coffee. She put the ice on my eyes until the governor's chimpanzee{{--}}
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' Okay FINE! But just this once. Your order will be there any second.
:::''{After ordering the Romance Dinner}''
:::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Uh, just leave it by the vending machines how bout?
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry sir, I'm going to need an actual room number.
:::{{short hr}}
:::''{The Lobby?}''
:::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' You can just leave it in the lobby. Between the armed guards. It's cool, it's cool.
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry sir, I'm going to need an actual room number.
:::{{short hr}}
:::''{Stuck Floor}''
:::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Can you just leave it between two floors that I don't know what they are? There were some people there with shoes.
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' I'm sorry sir, I'm going to need an actual room number.
:::{{short hr}}
:::''{If the Penthouse room was identified, continues below automatically.}''
:::''{First time only}''
:::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I'm staying in room 802, don't you know.
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' Ah! Our VIP! Right away sir! We pride ourselves on unrealistically fast service! Can I get you something else?
:::{{short hr}}
:::'''ROOM SERVICE:''' That will be at your door in moments. Can I get you something else?
::''{If all items have been ordered and the hat is acquired}''
::''{SEND HELP!}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Get hot water, get some iodine, get some disinfectant!
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' If you won't send help, will you send me... um... a letter? Tell me bout your family?
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I need reinforcements!
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Mr. Me-sident, we have a situation. I'd like me to come with me to safety.
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' There's a guy! With a spoon hat! And he's tryin to meech me!

====Any item &rarr; Callbox====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't need to tamper with this call box. I should just use it the way Rob intended. Rob being the inventor of the call box. Lord Robert Callboxon.

==Shaft (Penthouse)==
===Dagger Skew===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' It's Dagger Skew! Master cheatburgler and stabby specialist!
:''{A menu appears}''
::''{Whatcha doin?}''
::''{First time only}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' What are you doin danglin around this elevator shaft?
::'''DAGGER SKEW:''' Mmermer Mmhe! ''{takes out a shiny diamond}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' You stole the Bowlegged Diamond from a guest in this hotel?!
::'''DAGGER SKEW:''' Murmurer murmumble meh!
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Well, at least you're not the one tryin to kill me! Best of luck to ya!
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' What are you doin again?
::'''DAGGER SKEW:''' Mmermer Mmhe!
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Wight, wight. Diamonds.
::{{short hr}}
::''{Daggers}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' What's up with that dagger headband? Does it give you an advantage on the 70's-ball court?
::'''DAGGER SKEW:''' Hermerman bermerman.
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Oh! They're perfectly spaced for slicin' up eyeballs? Whoa-ho-ho-HO. ''{steps back}'' I'll just be over here.
::''{This menu item disappears.}''
::{{short hr}}
::''{After asking what he's doing}''
::''{Diamond?}''
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Say, can I have that Bowlegged Diamond?
::'''DAGGER SKEW:''' harshymarsh shimsham!
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' You'll only swap it for something of equal or morer value?
::{{short hr}}
::'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Gimme that diamond!
::'''DAGGER SKEW:''' Grumbletown!

====Cuppa Ice &rarr; Dagger Skew====
:''{Before talking to Dagger Skew}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't got no reason to give him my hard-fought cup of ice.
:{{short hr}}
:''{After talking to Dagger Skew}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Hey Dagger Skew, I'll trade ya that diamond for this cup o' stolen ice! Facets, cuts, clarity! These babies got all the jewel words I know.
:'''DAGGER SKEW:''' Mmmrrh MEH!
:''{Dangeresque Too gives Dagger Skew the shiny cup of ice. Dagger Skew gives him the shiny diamond.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Pleasure doin bidness witcha!
:''{Dagger Skew rappells out of sight. An orange card falls down past the elevator.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' What was that orange thing?

====Any other item &rarr; Dagger Skew====
:''{Before talking to Dagger Skew}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Do you want this item for reasons unknown?
:'''DAGGER SKEW:''' Mrrah mrrah mraah!
:{{short hr}}
:''{After talking to Dagger Skew}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Will you trade me that Bowlegged Diamond for this?
:'''DAGGER SKEW:''' Mrrah mrrah mraah!

==Lobby==
:''{First time only, after stopping the elevator}''
:''{The elevator door opens to the lobby. Two silhouettes stand in front of the door.}''
:'''LEFT BAD GUY:''' Is that him?
:'''RIGHT BAD GUY:''' He matches the description. Propeller cap, cool shades, star shirt.
:'''LEFT BAD GUY:''' Do we shoot him?
:'''RIGHT BAD GUY:''' I think so?
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Uh oh!
:''{Dangeresque Too quickly ducks to close the elevator as bullets dent the door.}''
:''{Title card appears.}''
:'''NARRATOR:''' Roomisode X: Inspection Certificate On File In Building Office!
:''{Cut back to gameplay.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Guess I'm not gettin out of here til I DON'T match their description. Star shirt, cool shades, propeller cap. I need a threesguise!

===Elevator Doors===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I can't go out there yet! Those guards will shoot me on sight! I still match their description too much!
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I really shouldn't go out there yet.
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Yeah, maybe the guards have left by now.
:''{He opens the door. They have not.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Oh, hi guys.
:''{The screen is covered in shooting effects, and Dangeresque Too's cool shades and cap tumble to the floor. Game over.}''
:{{short hr}}
:''{After Kid Meal and Hat have been used on Dangeresque Too}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I still match the guards' description too much! I've got my cool shades and my propeller cap covered up but I still gotta do something about my star shirt!

====Any item &rarr; Elevator Doors====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' T'willn't help me, that.

==Floor 7 1/2?==
:''{First time only}''
:'''WOMAN:''' Ugh! The elevator's stuck in between floors again.
:'''MAN:''' How are we supposed to murder Dangeresque Too if the stupid elevators won't work?
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' More guards! Good thing they can't see me down here!

===Certain Death===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' ''{crouches down for a moment}'' I don't think I wanna climb in there.
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' On second thought, it's always wise to keep clickin on somethin labeled Certain Death! Here I go! ''{crouches down}''
:''{Dangeresque Too falls down the elevator shaft and explodes. Game over.}''

====Any item &rarr; Certain Death====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' When I was a kid I lost a rubber walrus eraser down an elevator shaft. I can't risk losin' nothin else!

===Loafers===
:''{If the quarter has not been taken}''
:''{Close up on the woman's shoes. There is a quarter in one of them.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' This lady's wearing a sweet pair of quarterloafers! She must be rich!
:''{Cut to elevator.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I'm a snitch one of the quarters!
:'''WOMAN:''' Oh! Something touched my foot!
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Or maybe not.
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I'm a snitch one of the quarters!
:'''WOMAN:''' Something keeps brushing against my foot!
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Or maybe not.
:{{short hr}}
:''{If the quarter has been taken}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Boop! ''{wiggles the shoe}''

====Washer &rarr; Loafers====
:''{Before taking the quarter}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Lessee if I can swap out this washer for that quarter without her noticing.
:''{Close-up. The swap is made. Cut to elevator.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I did it!
:'''WOMAN:''' Did you just touch my feet?
:'''MAN:''' Um. Gross, no.
:{{short hr}}
:''{After taking the quarter}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Naw, I don't need another quarter.

====Quarter &rarr; Loafers====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't want to put it back. I might could get me a gumball later!

====Flower &rarr; Loafers====
:''{First time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Maybe I can aroma up these stinky feets.
:'''WOMAN:''' ACHOO!
:'''MAN:''' What was that?! I almost shot you!
:'''WOMAN:''' Something activated my allergies.
:{{short hr}}
:'''WOMAN:''' ACHOO!

====Any other item &rarr; Loafers====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' This plus feet is NOT an equation I need to solve for.

===Sneakers===
:''{Dangeresque Too unties the man's sneakers.}''
:'''WOMAN:''' Oh, your shoes have come untied.
:''{If coffee is not dripping on his head}''
:'''MAN:''' Huh. That weird.
:''{If coffee is dripping on his head}''
:'''MAN:''' Prolly didn't notice because of this coffee drippin on my head.
:''{He bends down to retie his shoes. If wearing a hat, he drops it.}''
:{{short hr}}
:'''WOMAN:''' Oh, your shoes are untied again.
:''{If coffee is not dripping on his head}''
:'''MAN:''' Huh. That's still weird.
:''{If coffee is dripping on his head}''
:'''MAN:''' Gimme a break! I got a bad case of coffee drippins!
:''{He bends down to retie his shoes. If wearing a hat, he drops it.}''

====Any item &rarr; Sneakers====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' This plus feet is NOT an equation I need to solve for.

===Hat===
:''{Dangeresque Too takes the hat.}''
:'''MAN:''' Hey! Where'd my hat go?
:'''WOMAN:''' You already lost the hat I just gave you?! How gratingly ungrateful!
:'''MAN:''' Shut up lady!

==Vending==
===Coffee Machine===
:''{First time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' It's an old coffee vending machine. Still only costs a quarter!
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Lessee, Light Roast, Mild Roast, Hardly Roast, and See-Thru Roast. Aw man, this thing don't got no Hot Jones?

====Washer &rarr; Coffee Machine====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Aw man. It doesn't work. Guess I need an actual quarter.

====Quarter &rarr; Coffee Machine====
:''{Dangeresque Too puts the quarter inside. A cup is dispensed. Coffee pours into the cup, melting it.}''
:''{First time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That scalding coffee straight up vaporized that styrofoam cup! At least it gave me my quarter back.
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' It just sits there for a sec and then VOIP!! No more coffee. At least it gave me my quarter back.

====Any other item &rarr; Coffee Machine====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Um, I think it only takes quarters.

===Cup===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I got the styro before that coffee went pyro.
:''{The coffee pours out from the machine and leaks out onto the floor}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Ooh, Puddleman's Coffee.

===Puddle===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Looks like it might be seepin through the floor tiles.

====Cup &rarr; Puddle====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't wanna risk melting my great new cup! What a cup that is!

====Any other item &rarr; Puddle====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' A bad idea all around!

====Bib &rarr; Puddle====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Soppins!
:''{He wipes the coffee with the bib}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' The bib is covered in coffee BBQ grodiness now. And the puddle kinda looks n' smells like barf. Hooray!

===Ice Machine===
:''{Ice comes out of the machine.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' It made the ice go down through the little grate. It was a little great.

====Cup &rarr; Ice Machine====
:''{The cup is filled with ice.}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I filled my cup up with ice!

====Any other item &rarr; Ice Machine====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' That doesn't need any ice.

===Romance Debris===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Whoa! There's no food left. Maybe the Coffee and Ice Machines had a romantic dinner together. A ro-ro din-din! Anyways, I'm takin this flower. Might come in handy. ''{picks up rose}'' Happy anniversary you two. May you one day make beautiful cold brews together.

==Penthouse==
===Room Door===
:''{First time only}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Huh. It's locked. Doesn't even have a room number. ''{knocks}'' Open up! I'm being pursued by sinister agents!
:''{The door opens}''
:'''BUBS:''' Go away! I hate you! ''{slams the door}''
:{{short hr}}
:'''BUBS:''' ''{opens door}'' Unless you're room service, I don't wanna hear it! ''{slams door}''
:{{short hr}}
:''{After ordering the Kid Meal and Messy Ol' Ribs}''
:'''BUBS:''' ''{opens door}'' Now I'm fulla room service! So unless you're a human naptake, lemee 'lone!

====Diamond &rarr; Room Door====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Hey, is this your Bowlegged Diamond? Do you want it back?
:'''BUBS:''' Can I eat it?
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Prolly not without significant dental trauma.
:'''BUBS:''' Then I bid you a goodly bye!

====Keycard &rarr; Room Door====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Let's see if this keycard works.
:''{The door opens.}''
:'''BUBS:''' Hey! What the crap?!
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' ''{sounding official}'' Uh, I was just trying to get into my room. I'm in town for the symposium, I sympose...
:'''BUBS:''' You got the wrong room, business man! This is room 802! They coded your keycard wrong!
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Ah yes. I see. Nevertheless, might I come in to peek about for a pair of stylish socks?
:'''BUBS:''' GET OUTTA HERE!! ''{slams door}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Room 802!

====Any other item &rarr; Room Door====
:''{Before ordering the Kid Meal and Messy Ol' Ribs}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Hey occupant, may I interest you in random inventory item?
:'''BUBS:''' ''{opens door}'' Unless you're room service, I don't wanna hear it! ''{slams door}''
:{{short hr}}
:''{After ordering the Kid Meal and Messy Ol' Ribs}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Hey occupant, may I interest you in random inventory item?
:'''BUBS:''' ''{opens door}'' Now I'm fulla room service! So unless you're a human naptake, lemee 'lone!

===Kid Meal Trash===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Aw man, I was hopin they'd leave the toy surprise. Just the upside-down clown bag. Which is what I like to call perps when I slam em up against the wall! Freeze Clown Bag! Dangeresque Too is breakin up your three ring circus ring/drug ring. Thing. ''{picks up bag}''

====Any item &rarr; Kid Meal Trash====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't need to use nothin with this stuff.
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I should just get what I can from what's left.

===Rib Detritus===
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' The ribs are all gone. But they did come with a bib! Mine-take! ''{picks up bib}''

====Any item &rarr; Rib Detritus====
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I don't need to use nothin with this stuff.
:{{short hr}}
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' I should just get what I can from what's left.

==Using Two Inventory Items Together==
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Dangeresque Too never combines items. Except for grit and determination! I mash them into a paste and wear it as a hydrating sleep mask!

==Game Over==
''{The words "Game Over" appear on black in Dangeresque Font, and are replaced by:}''

:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Or did I?

:''{These are following phrases that will appear in the following order, changing every time you lose.}''
:That's not wight...
:{{short hr}}
:Oops, you bwoke it...
:{{short hr}}
:Oh hewwo sudden death...
:{{short hr}}
:That did not look good for Dangeresque Too...
:{{short hr}}
:Lies. All lies!
:''{The game then cuts back to the moment before you committed the action that led to the Game Over.}''

==Ending==
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Alright, I think I've got enough to conceal my identity.
:''{He puts on the bib, the bag, and the hat}''
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' Hopefully those guards just let me walktz right out the front door. ''{steps toward elevator}'' Waltz-walkin', that is.
:''{Dangeresque Too steps out. The doors close.}''
:'''LEFT BAD GUY:''' AHH! All my childhood nightmares made real!
:'''RIGHT BAD GUY:''' Pump it fulla lead!!
:'''DANGERESQUE TOO:''' ''{unsubtitled}'' The pipes are broken!
:'''LEFT BAD GUY:''' OWW!!
:'''RIGHT BAD GUY:''' OOF!!
:'''LEFT BAD GUY:''' CLOWN!!
:'''RIGHT BAD GUY:''' I'm being assaulted by an unknown masked assailant!!
:''{Cut to Dangeresque Too leaving the hotel wearing his disguise. The text "Roomisode X Complete" appears.}''
:'''NARRATOR:''' Roomisode Complete!
:''{Dangeresque Too bursts out. His disguise falls off and blinks away. Pan up to the top of the hotel. The sign reads "Swissblonkel Hotel". The letters blink.}''
:''{Fade to black. "Ended" appears.}''

{{Dangeresque|cat=Dangeresque: The Roomisode Triungulate}}

[[Category:Video Game Responses]]