Wrestling Character Variations

From Homestar Runner Wiki

(Redirected from Il Cartographer)
Jump to: navigation, search

In the Strong Bad Email yes, wrestling, Strong Bad reveals his old professional wrestling alter egos, and some other characters' personas as well.

Image Description Appearances
"Of course, they wanted me to be one of those lame masked wrestlers at first, but I had gimmickier plans." Sir Boliver Turnbuckle was Strong Bad's first wrestling gimmick. His signature move was the 1/8th Nelson, which he was known as the master of. The 1/8th Nelson doesn't seem to have much effect, as it appears to be simply grabbing the opponent. He can be seen demostrating it on Strong Sad. He wears a crown and a singlet with a crown on it, and is described by Strong Bad as a "pompous Brit". According to Strong Bad, that was back in the days when pretending to be a pompous Brit was considered a premium gimmick. Strong Bad abandoned this gimmick in favor of il Cartographer after he became more popular. Sir Boliver Turnbuckle is only seen in black-and-white photographs. He is a reference to wrestlers such as "Lord" Steven Regal, "Squire" Dave Taylor and "Earl" Bobby Eaton, as well as a reference to other wrestlers who falsify their claim to British royalty. yes, wrestling
"I claim-a this saggy ring in the name of il Cartographer!"

Il Cartographer (meaning "the mapmaker") was Strong Bad's second wrestling incarnation. He wears a floppy orange beret, a frilly white shirt, and a brown vest, and talks in an Italian accent. One of his gimmicks was that he'd always come into the ring throwing maps to the restrooms into the crowd (labelled "Ye Olde Restroom Trail"). At least once, he would claim the ring with a flag reading "the il-est". He also has his own wrestling theme, mostly consisting of his name. The Announcer says that he hails from the age of exploration, and is the namer of nations.

According to Strong Bad in Fan Costumes 2017, he won the Continental Breakfast title belt in front of a depressing basement wall with some sheets taped to it, a venue he used to wrestle in. At this point, he was enemies with Homestar Runner (or his wrestling alter ego, the Jack 'Em Up Kid). Homestar calls him "el Photographer" and mixes up his costume with Rudy from Fat Albert. His name uses an integral article, as the singers sometimes call him "the Il Cartographer" (meaning "the the").

yes, wrestling, Fan Costumes 2017 (costume; mentioned)
"Hoo yeah!"

The Jack 'Em Up Kid was Homestar Runner's wrestling alter ego. His red pants (reading "'EM UP!" on the back) are pulled up to his chest, which has cinnamon stubble on it, and his hat has no propeller. He has white kneepads and shoes. He talks extremely fast, frequently leaning to the camera and saying "Hoo yeah!", and constantly running out of breath and inhaling quickly in between words. He refers to his fans as "Jack 'Emites" and "Jack 'Emettes" and he has licensed merchandise. His imaginary tag team partner is named Gary the Legend.

His catch phrase may be "What you gone did when you get jacked up by the Jack 'Em Up Kid?", a twist of Hulk Hogan's famous interview-ending catchphrase, "Whatcha gonna do when Hulkamania runs wild on you?!" In addition, beginning "Well you know, announcer man..." is similar to Hogan's famous interview opening, "Well ya know something, Mean Gene...", addressed to long-time wrestling personality "Mean" Gene Okerlund. Homestar also talks about his Jackemites, similar to the Hogan's hulkamaniacs. His costume and name resemble that of veteran pro-wrestler Shawn Michaels, the Heartbreak Kid. His frequent use of the phrase "Hoo yeah!" is a reference to Macho Man Randy Savage, whose famous catchphrase was "Oooh yeah!" Gary the Legend's name is similar to wrestler and commentator Larry the Legend.

yes, wrestling, Sketchbook for November 29, 2007, Homestar Ruiner (mentioned)
"Nothing can stop the Wild Vacationers!" The Wild Vacationers was Strong Bad and Strong Mad's first wrestling team. They are dressed like tourists with fishing hats and cameras. Strong Mad wears a purple Hawaiian shirt, while Strong Bad wears a pair of sunglasses and sunscreen smeared over his seemingly nonexistent nose. It was deemed a "misfire", so Strong Bad and Strong Mad tried several other teams. The team is a reference to the Wild Samoans tag team who were managed by Captain Lou Albano, who would often wear a Hawaiian shirt to the ring. yes, wrestling
"You betta not mess with the Foreign Object Brothers!" The Foreign Object Bros. was Strong Bad and Strong Mad's second wrestling team. Strong Bad is wearing a black headband with a big knife tucked into it, and his pants have a wooden board, a wrench, and one other unidentifiable white object in them. Strong Mad has a razor blade lodged in his bleeding and apparently scarred forehead, a sledgehammer tucked into his black singlet, and the outline of a gun fully inside his singlet. A chainsaw blade can be seen behind him. Strong Mad's sledgehammer is a reference to Triple H, who uses a hammer as a trademark foreign object. The razor blade lodged in Strong Mad's forehead references blading, the method that professional wrestlers use to make themselves bleed mid-match. Blading involves using a razor blade like Strong Mad's to surreptitiously cut oneself mid-match so that nobody notices that the cut is self-inflicted. Many older wrestlers have noticeable scar tissue on their forehead (much like Strong Mad does in the clip) from blading hundreds of times in their careers. yes, wrestling
"Rax and Arby: The Sanctum of Spiky Shoulder Pads."
"Arby" redirects here. For the restaurant chain, see Arby's.

Rax and Arby, the Sanctum of Spiky Shoulder Pads, was Strong Bad and Strong Mad's third wrestling team. As the name implies, they wear spiky shoulder pads. Strong Mad's singlet is red and has "RAX" written on it, and Strong Bad wears a green mohawk. Their names refer to restaurants Arby's and Rax, both of which specialize in roast beef sandwiches. In an Easter egg, Rax can be seen an interview with the Announcer, in which he adds "beef and cheddar, five for five", a reference to Arby's namesake restaurant. The team is also referencing the Road Warriors tag team (also known as the Legion of Doom), who became famous for their shoulder pads covered in spikes.

yes, wrestling
"You better hope for your guts and your mercy can save you at this Sunday's PayPerViewver Series." The Facepaint Connection were Strong Bad and Strong Mad's fourth wrestling team, as well as the one that they finally settled on. They wear heavy white, blue, red, and gray facepaint, and Strong Mad's singlet reads "FACEPAINT CONNECTION". They are seemingly managed by the insidious Mr. Cheatayama. Strong Bad claims to have climbed the mountains and breathed the facepainted fumes, and he won't let the Jack 'Em Up Kid and Gary the Legend walk away with the title. After he's done talking, he frantically asks to be taken off the air. The facepaint is a reference to the Blade Runners, a tag team in Bill Watts' old UWF. yes, wrestling
"Mr. Cheatayama with his trademark whisk!" The insidious Mr. Cheatayama seems to be the manager of Facepaint Connection. He is The Cheat with a painted-on mustache and goatee, a black bowler hat, and holding "his trademark whisk". He is based on famous wrestling manager Mr. Fuji. yes, wrestling, Fan Costumes 2017 (costume; mentioned)
"All right, all you gophers out there, ha-bring-it-on!"

Gardenboy is Strong Sad's wrestling identity. He has a red rake, straw hat, and a green watering can that can spout flames. He refers to all of his opponents as gophers. He has his own wrestling theme, based on Il Cartographer's. (The singers even accidentally say "Il Cartographer" at one point.) Later on, the Magnificent Marzipan steals his garden tools. Instead of gophers, he later asks to fight half woman-half man's champions instead.

He was named after the sender of the email yes, wrestling, after Strong Bad suggests to the sender to "stop trying to perfect the Summer Squash Suplex" and get "a rake, a straw hat, maybe a watering can and start screaming about how your opponents are gophers". His flame-throwing watering can is a reference to TNA wrestler/booker/owner Jeff Jarrett, who often makes his entrance holding a pyro-spewing guitar over his head.

yes, wrestling, hremail 3184, Fan Costumes 2017 (costume)
The Magnificent Marzipan is apparently Marzipan's wrestling persona. She isn't seen, only mentioned by Gardenboy in the Easter egg in hremail 3184. She stole all Gardenboy's garden tools and lends them to Strong Bad so he can beat up Homestar. Gardenboy doesn't care if she's a women's champion, a men's champion, a half woman-half man's champion, which he would prefer to fight instead. It is unknown if this is Marzipan's real wrestling gimmick, or just a nickname given to her by Gardenboy. hremail 3184 (mentioned)
Personal tools