The Battle of Strong Badia
From Homestar Runner Wiki
(The previous wording made it sound too absurd for an obviously serious war document like this) |
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==Summary of Events== | ==Summary of Events== | ||
| - | It is a bitter irony that Homestar's urge to win was what defeated him. Attempting to bolster his forces, Colonel Homestar tried to recruit [[Strong Bad]] himself, giving him warning of the impending invasion. Were it not for this error, Strong Bad may never have found out about the planned attack until it was too late, and Strong Badia might have fallen. As it happened, Homestar's mistake enabled Strong Bad to send his commando, [[Firebert]], to spy upon the Homestarmy's planning meeting, enabling him and [[Strong Mad]] to prepare for the invasion by | + | It is a bitter irony that Homestar's urge to win was what defeated him. Attempting to bolster his forces, Colonel Homestar tried to recruit [[Strong Bad]] himself, giving him warning of the impending invasion. Were it not for this error, Strong Bad may never have found out about the planned attack until it was too late, and Strong Badia might have fallen. As it happened, Homestar's mistake enabled Strong Bad to send his commando, [[Firebert]], to spy upon the Homestarmy's planning meeting, enabling him and [[Strong Mad]] to prepare for the invasion by arming themselves with [[badminton]] rackets and take position at he forefront of the invsion |
The battle lasted about ten seconds before it was canceled by Colonel Homestar so that Strong Bad and Strong Mad could play badminton. Homsar, unfortunately, deserted approximately three seconds into it, or simply didn't notice that they had reached their destination as his "helmet" was covering his eyes. The Homestarmy was forced to retreat (Colonel Homestar commented they were "in over [their] heads"); after Strong Sad exhorted the troops to "hold the line", [[Private Bennedetto]] was nearly slain by a smooth kick from Strong Bad's foot when he remained in enemy territory, and The Brothers Strong emerged victorious. | The battle lasted about ten seconds before it was canceled by Colonel Homestar so that Strong Bad and Strong Mad could play badminton. Homsar, unfortunately, deserted approximately three seconds into it, or simply didn't notice that they had reached their destination as his "helmet" was covering his eyes. The Homestarmy was forced to retreat (Colonel Homestar commented they were "in over [their] heads"); after Strong Sad exhorted the troops to "hold the line", [[Private Bennedetto]] was nearly slain by a smooth kick from Strong Bad's foot when he remained in enemy territory, and The Brothers Strong emerged victorious. | ||
Revision as of 06:42, 11 November 2020
| The Battle of Strong Badia | |
|---|---|
 The Homestarmy advances into Strong Badia | |
| Appearance | Strong Bad Email army |
| Date | ca. January 5, 2004 |
| Location | Strong Badia |
| Result | Strong Badian victory |
| Casus belli | See above |
| Combatants | |
| Homestarmy | Strong Badia |
| Commanders | |
| Homestar Runner | Strong Bad |
| Strength | |
| Five (one deserted) | Three |
| Casualties | |
| Frank Bennedetto | None |
Strong Bad: I thought I knew what ridiculous was, until this day.
The Battle of Strong Badia was a minor conflict between the Homestarmy and Strong Badia, depicted in the Strong Bad Email army.
Cause of Conflict
Colonel Homestar Runner was driven to embark upon a campaign to invade and capture Strong Badia because he was tired of Strong Bad stealing the show (or as Homestar himself put it, because he was "sick and tired of playing second fiddle to a two-bit wrestleman and his yellow dog"). To aid his cause, he recruited Homsar, Strong Sad, the Painting of a Guy with a Big Knife and Third-Style Private Frank Bennedetto (actually a popcorn machine), and proceeded to march upon the encampment of the Brothers Strong. Homestar boasted that upon his victory, they would paint the fence a different color and put a fake beard on the Tire.
Summary of Events
It is a bitter irony that Homestar's urge to win was what defeated him. Attempting to bolster his forces, Colonel Homestar tried to recruit Strong Bad himself, giving him warning of the impending invasion. Were it not for this error, Strong Bad may never have found out about the planned attack until it was too late, and Strong Badia might have fallen. As it happened, Homestar's mistake enabled Strong Bad to send his commando, Firebert, to spy upon the Homestarmy's planning meeting, enabling him and Strong Mad to prepare for the invasion by arming themselves with badminton rackets and take position at he forefront of the invsion
The battle lasted about ten seconds before it was canceled by Colonel Homestar so that Strong Bad and Strong Mad could play badminton. Homsar, unfortunately, deserted approximately three seconds into it, or simply didn't notice that they had reached their destination as his "helmet" was covering his eyes. The Homestarmy was forced to retreat (Colonel Homestar commented they were "in over [their] heads"); after Strong Sad exhorted the troops to "hold the line", Private Bennedetto was nearly slain by a smooth kick from Strong Bad's foot when he remained in enemy territory, and The Brothers Strong emerged victorious.
Since this defeat, the Homestarmy has only been seen in action thrice: making sure that no one did any work on Labor Day, attempting to recruit troops in the email more armies, and overthrowing the King of Town in Strong Badia the Free. The limited accounts of the Labor Day campaign indicate they had some success in this endeavor, although they appeared to have scared away their only taker at their previous recruitment campaign, yet it was during the Strong Badian Revolution that the Homestarmy was re-formed to take over the Municipality.
