flashback

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Strong Bad Email #100
watch   ← different town car →
Puttin' their weight on it.

In the long-anticipated 100th email, Jon from NH asks Strong Bad how long he has known Homestar Runner. The answer is too big to be shown in anything but...WIDESCREEEEEEEEEEEEN!

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Homestar Runner, Tiny-Handed Strong Bad, Coach Z, The Prince of Town, Strong Mad, Pom Pom, Bubs, Strong Sad, Marzipan, Mr. Bland, Señor, The Cheat, Limozeen (Easter egg), Senor Cardgage (Easter egg), Old-Timey Strong Bad (Easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, The Moon, The Sweet Sweet Rainbow Bridge, The Field, Marzipan's House (Easter egg), Telegraph Room (Easter egg), Basement of the Brothers Strong (Easter egg)

Computer: Compy 386

Date: Tuesday, March 16, 2004

Running Time: 5:01

Page Title: Compy 386!!

DVD: strongbad_email.exe Disc Three

Contents

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {shouting} ONE TWO THREE FOUR—

{Strong Bad starts singing hard rock with instruments in the background, and the following words appear as they are said:}

STRONG BAD: EMAIL IS AWESOME {"AWESOME"}, EMAIL IS WEIRD {"WEiRD"}, EMAIL IS AWESOME {"AWESOME"} AND EMAIL IS WEIRD {"WEiRD"}! And I'll never forget the way it was, GRRRL {"grrrl"}...uh!

{Starts reading the email, however, the text is in the style of Tandy, and it is in fact the very first e-mail he ever did.}

{Strong Bad stops reading at "before you go to".}

STRONG BAD: ...dajede...wait a minute! {hits Compy, the text fixes itself to be a new email} There we go!

{reading}

{Instead of "New Hampshire," Strong Bad says "No Hamsters."}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Oh, I got flashbacks alright, Jon. I'm like, Discount Flashback Warehouse over here. But this particular flashback has way too much historical significance to be shown in anything but WIDESCREEEEEEEEEEEEN. Left side: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAH!

{As he says this with a resonating noise, the left side of the screen expands out. The camera then cuts out to a wide shot. Strong Bad stops typing and turns to his right.}

STRONG BAD: Right side: WOOOOOAHH—

{the right side of the screen starts to expand, then abruptly bounces out to its full extent, revealing Homestar.}

STRONG BAD: Wha-uh, what are you doin' over there?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, I'm pretty much here every week. It's just that usually I'm behind the black.

STRONG BAD: Guess I should start...lookin' to the right more often.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: In fact, I think I might live here.

STRONG BAD: I don't think so. If you lived here, you'd have less non-broken bones. And more crushed spirits.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {leaning forward} Yes, sir.

STRONG BAD: Frame shift left! WOOOOOAAHHH!

{The screen starts shifting left to get Homestar out of the shot.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: See ya after the flashback!

{The screen shows a picture of Strong Bad on the moon with a tennis racket. The drawing is in the style of the original children's book, though the characters have limited animation. Strong Bad narrates the story but doesn't read everything—text that he doesn't read is included in this transcript in parentheses. Also, character voices are imitated and are denoted in brackets.}

STRONG BAD: {narrating} Strong Bad meets the Homestar Runner.

{The page turns to a picture of just Strong Bad.}

Everyone loves Strong Bad. He is an okay guy.

{The page turns to a picture of Strong Bad and Coach Z playing tennis on the moon.}

One day Strong Bad was finishing up a game of tennis on the moon with his pal, the Coach Z. He won 1,000,000 to 3. {Strong Bad} "You see, 3 is clearly a smaller number than a million," said Strong Bad. {Coach Z} "Ooooooh. Now I understand."

{The page turns to Strong Bad and Coach Z flying down a rainbow from the moon to earth.}

They flew on a sweet, sweet rainbow bridge back down to Free Country, USA.

{The page turns to Coach Z holding a towel and talking to Strong Bad.}

{Coach Z} "I'ma go shower up!" said the Coach Z. {Strong Bad} "Gross!" said Strong Bad. "Shut up!"

{The page turns to see Strong Bad walking toward a giant pink egg with yellow spots.}

Walking home, Strong Bad came upon a big ol' egg. "Waaaaaaaaagh!"

{The page turns to a closer view of Strong Bad and the egg.}

"I wonder what's inside," thought tiny-handed Strong Bad.

{The page turns to see Homestar behind the egg wearing a yellow shirt with a duck on it.}

{Homestar} "Hello! How do you like my egg, Mr. Strong Bad?" said a voice from behind. {Strong Bad} "Who the crap are you, Duckshirt?" asked No-shirt. {Homestar} "I'm The Homestar Runner!" said the duckshirt. "Some folk say I'm a terrific athlete."

{The page turns to a closer view of the scene.}

{Strong Bad} "Well I folk say you're a terrific liar!" (said Strong Bad.) "This is plainly my egg." {The Prince of Town} "What's all the commotion about?"

{The page zooms out, showing the Prince of Town looking at Strong Bad and Homestar.}

...said the svelt, young Prince of Town. "And who's this weirdo in the duckie shirt?" {Homestar} "I'm The Homestar Runner! Some folk say I'm a terrific (athlete!" said Duckshirt.) {Strong Bad} "Prancibald over here says this egg belongs to him, when I found it first."

{Zoom in to a closeup of the Prince of Town.}

{The Prince of Town} "We'll settle this with a ten-step footrace."

{The page turns to show a crowd of characters, including Mr. Bland and Señor from the original children's book. Everyone is watching Strong Bad and Homestar at the start line of a race.}

And so they all gathered for a ten-step footrace. The slim and trim young Prince of Town explained the rules.

{A piece of paper shows up reading: "Ten-step Footrace Official Rules. Rule One. Whoever goes the most distance in ten steps, will be the winner! Rule Two. No biting."}

{The Prince of Town} "Whoever goes the most distance in ten steps, will be the winner!"

{The page turns to see Strong Bad and Homestar at the line and Marzipan giving the startoff.}

{Marzipan} "Ready-and-set-and-go-now." {they start running, with Homestar counting} {Homestar} "One, two, three, four, five, six..." {Strong Bad takes tiny steps and is way behind} {Strong Bad} "Keep up the pace. Gotta break 4:40"

{The page turns to see silhouettes of everyone, and Homestar has reached the end.}

{Homestar} "Ten!"

{The Prince of Town} "And the Duckie-man is the winner. Loser gets the egg."

{The background music plays several confused notes, then the page turns to a closeup of Homestar, with Strong Bad and the egg in the background.}

{Homestar} "WHAAAAT??!!?&,:;%${}" {Strong Bad} "Hooray a-for me!!"

{The page turns to show Strong Mad holding the egg over his head while Strong Bad watches.}

And so Strong Mad helped to break open the egg. {Strong Mad tosses the egg}

{The page turns to show the egg broken, and with a bunch of fish sticks inside it.}

And out poured a lifetime supply of fishsticks. And a The Cheat!!!!

{The Cheat springs out of the egg, then the page turns to a closeup of The Cheat. The page turns again to see Strong Bad and The Cheat with the egg in the background.}

{Strong Bad} "Awesome! My very own a The Cheat!"

{The page turns again, showing everyone hanging out by a boombox.}

And so, The Cheat mashed play on an extremely expensive jambox with high-speed dubbing and everybody put their weight on it! {The Cheat plays a remix of the original intro music for H*R.com, and everyone dances.}

{Cut back to Strong Bad sitting at the stool, talking to Homestar, who's sitting on the floor listening to the tale.}

STRONG BAD: So that's pretty much how it all went down, huh?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, yes. Read me another one! Another one!

STRONG BAD: Ohhhhh, very well. This one's called The Homestar Runner Gets Something Stuck In His Craw!

{Strong Bad pulls out a children's book of the same name. Compy beeps and turns blue with the caption "Congratulations! You have answered 100 emails." and pixelated fireworks.}

STRONG BAD: What the— Whoa! Would ya look at that! 100 emails. I had no idea! I lost count around 51. Well, I suppose I should do something to celebrate... uh... ooh! I'll say email 100 times! Email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email...

{As Strong Bad continues, The Paper comes down}

STRONG BAD: ...email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email eMAIL-a email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email-mail-nahduhluh email email email email e-meh-meh-meh-meh-mail email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email email-mail email email email email email email email EMAIL! {takes a big breath} Ooh. I'm pa— I'm parched. {wheezes} I need a glass of water.

{A pixelated glass of water appears onscreen.}

Easter Eggs

A children's book by Mike and Craig
  • When Strong Bad pulls out the book "The Homestar Runner Gets Something Stuck In His Craw," you can click on it to get a closer look.
  • After Strong Bad says "Email" 100 times, you can click on the words:
    • "Congratulations!" for a message from Limozeen.
LIMOZEEN: Congratulations Strong Bad on your 100th email!
{slight pause}
LARRY: {startling the other bandmembers} WE'RE FROM THE BAND LIMOZEEN!
PERRY: Uh, I think it says that at the top of the screen, Larry.
LARRY: WELL I DIDN'T KNOW THAT!
{The band members strike various poses and the frame freezes, as the central riff from "Because It's Midnite" plays.}
  • click on "you" to see Homestar deliver his message.
{Homestar is standing in the field, wearing the Duckie Shirt.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Happy hundredth birthday, Strong Bad!
  • click on "have" to see a message from Marzipan.
{Marzipan is standing in her house near her answering machine.}
MARZIPAN: Whoo-hoo, Strong Bad, whoo-hoo. I've almost caught up with you. I only have 90 more answering machines to go.
  • click on "answered" to see Senor Cardgage say some stuff.
{Senor Cardgage is standing in The Field near his bush.}
SENOR CARDGAGE: Many combolations, Elizagerth! {holds up a sign reading "combolations, elizagerth," and puts it back down, then produces a melty candy bar from behind his back} I hope you get all my... particles.
STRONG BAD: {off screen} Man, so cool!
  • click on "100" to see Old-Timey Strong Bad making a telegram.
{Old-Timey Strong Bad is standing next to a telegraph machine. Half of his mustache has been ripped off, and he is holding a envelope that looks like it contains the missing half of the mustache. The "Loafing Not Permitted" sign hangs on the wall.}
OLD-TIMEY STRONG BAD: {operating the telegraph} Well done, my doppelgänger! Stop! By the time you read this telegrammaparcel, I'll be long dead! Stop! Therefore, I've enclosed half of my mustache herein. Stop! I bid you good tidings, and may you continue to flummox those less fortunate than you!
  • Also, clicking in the 2 areas where the fireworks go off will bring you to two other shorts.
{cut to Strong Bad's basement with the Television. Strong Bad's face appears on it}
STRONG BAD: {in a mumbling voice} Come on down to Discount Flashback Warehouse.
{Discount Flashback Warehouse text appears, then disappears. Cut back so the screen shows Strong Bad's body}
STRONG BAD: I've got this season. {He gestures to the left, where a screen from "different town", also featuring Modestly Hot Homsar, appears.} Last season. {He gestures to the right where a screen from "band names" appears.} Even stuff I've just made up! {The screenshots disappear and "just made up!!" appears as he says it.}
{Cuts to just his head again, next to text reading "These prices: $9 $6.53."}
STRONG BAD: How can I make these prices any lower?
{Cut to Strong Bad standing beneath yellow text that reads "Discount Flashback Warehouse."}
STRONG BAD: Just ask for me, the guy that works here {very quietly, trailing off} at the flashback place.
  • The firework on the right shows you what became of the lifetime supply of fishsticks.
{Cut to the field back in the flashback. The Prince of Town is standing near the broken-open egg.}
THE PRINCE OF TOWN: Will no one claim this lifetime supply of fishsticks?
{Prince of Town does an over-the-top look left and right. This is the dance he did when The Cheat mashed play on the expensive jambox during the flashback.}

Fun Facts

Explanations

  • To "stick in one's craw" is an idiom referring to a behavior or act that one can not tolerate. It originated as a literal statement, such as a stone being stuck in the craw of a bird; the stone is impossible to swallow, or tolerate.
  • High-speed dubbing is a feature of many dual-cassette boomboxes that enables the user to copy one cassette tape to another at a higher speed than normal playback speed, albeit with less accuracy.
  • A "doppelgänger" is commonly known as a "copy" of someone.
  • The widescreen is 750×400 pixels, a perfect 1.85:1 aspect ratio. Normal toons are 550×400, or 1.375:1.

Trivia

Homestar with sandals and a (green) duckie shirt
  • At 5 minutes in length, this was longest Strong Bad Email when it was released, and is the longest Compy 386-era email.
  • The DVD commentary for this episode reveals several interesting facts—originally, it would have been animated in the normal style, and would have told a different story, until the Brothers Chaps decided to re-write it halfway through. Originally, story elements included Strong Bad wearing a star shirt, and Marzipan attempting to do something about Homestar's awful fashion sense (his duckie shirt, and also in this version, a pair of sandals). She gets him a star shirt, and Strong Bad rips his own shirt off in protest, which is why nowadays, Strong Bad almost never wears a shirt.
  • The email was assigned the URL of "http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemailahundred.html," breaking the convention of the previous ninety-nine. This was done because of Not the 100th Email!!!.
  • The label on the disk in the floppy disk container reads "Cave Quest".
  • This is the first time a character has mentioned Free Country, USA.
  • Strong Bad actually says the word "email" exactly 100 times.
  • This is the debut of live action in the Homestar Runner universe.
  • This email and retirement are tied for the most Easter eggs in any email to date, with eight. They're second on the site total, tied with Halloween Fairstival and Halloween Potion-ma-jig. The toon with the most Easter eggs is 3 Times Halloween Funjob with ten.
  • Old-Timey Strong Bad appearing with half a mustache was inspired by a waiter The Brothers Chaps once encountered who sported the same odd facial hair style, as revealed in the Flashforward Interview.
  • The font used on "The Homestar Runner Gets Something Stuck in his Craw" is Bauhaus 93, the same font used on Homsar's shirt.

Remarks

  • It is debatable whether the story in the book really "happened", since Strong Bad could be making it up. Homestar verifies the tale, but this may just be typical, dense Homestar behavior.
  • Though the style of the artwork and the voice acting for most of the characters resembled closely that of the classic Homestar cartoons, Strong Bad in the flashback, for some reason, sounds nothing like the real Strong Bad from Marshmallow's Last Stand-era cartoons. Old Strong Bad's manner of speaking was very loud and dramatic (almost overacted), and he had a strong Mexican accent. Tiny Handed Strong Bad in the flashback is just the opposite, speaking in a monotonic, mumbling fashion.
  • When he reads the Tandy e-mail, his accent is more like it is in the old cartoons
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