Alcohol

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Current revision as of 10:48, 20 December 2022

Premium Alcoholic Cold Ones

The characters in the Homestar Runner universe are known to reference and even drink alcoholic beverages. This sometimes results in rather humorous dialogue, as shown in Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 5.0.

[edit] Appearances

[edit] General

AT THE PARTY

• The Luau — Among the phrases of "Polynesian Prose" that Strong Sad recites is "Kahlúa and Creme", an alcoholic drink.
• Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 5.0 — Coach Z and Bubs leave messages while drunk.
• Nighttime Driving Type Game — Features "Drunk Drivers".
• Everybody to the Limit — Strong Bad is seen sitting in an armchair with a glass of liquor.
• Ballad of The Sneak — As mentioned in the song, The Sneak drinks bootleg hooch, a homemade whiskey usually produced and/or sold through illegal methods.
  • Also, there is a political cartoon featuring the subjects of prohibition and the Hawley-Smoot Tariff.
• Because, It's Midnite — The song mentions a "champagne glass".
• Limozeen Thanksgiving E-Cards — Gary Palaroncini says, "Kids under six, don't drink and drive!"
• Email lures & jigs — Strong Bad attempts to "lure" fish into his and Coach Z's boat by telling them that they have "a keg" (to which he immediately appends "of worms and phytoplankton").
• Teen Girl Squad Issue 5 — The Olda Boys are seen with a cooler of "college drinks," likely another name for alcohol.
• Email radio — Homestar Runner throws a rocks glass while yelling "High-ball!"
• Email space program — During the SBASAF slide show, the narrator says, "Somebody get that man a highball".
• Email myths & legends — Bubs states that the Bear holding a Shark shot glasses are "always popular with the kids".
• Email your funeral — Strong Bad describes his funeral as being "off the wagon". "Falling off the wagon" is an idiom referring to a recovering alcoholic's relapse into alcoholism.
• Email hygiene — Gene/Strong Bad's mother claims to have a "grown-up headache", a likely reference to a hangover.
• Email nightlife — Bubs runs the bar at Club Technochocolate and Strong Bad orders an expensive drink in an eye dropper.
• Peasant's Quest — The Baby is said to go on to develop a mead problem later in life.
• That a Ghost — Fat Dudley is caught drinking hooch.
• Biz Cas Fri 2 — Homestar is almost certainly hung over, mentioning that he partied so hard the night before he can't remember what he did and falls asleep under Strong Bad's desk.
• Commandos in the Classroom — One of the Blue Laser Minions asks Fightgar "to put these wine coolers down your pants... er, down your headband".
• Teen Girl Squad Issue 10 — The Scotsmen are seen standing around a beer barrel with 3 Xs on it (when regarding beverages, X is a symbol for an alcoholic proof of 50; multiple X's indicate multiples of 50).
• Fan Costumes '06 — Strong Bad comments that The Cheat's hot mom is giving out frozen "margaracheatas".
• Sickly Sam's Big Outing — A jug of hooch can be found in Sickly Sam's stomach.
• Strong Badia the Free — Strong Bad can order a Cold One and a green drink from Bubs at Club Technochocolate, both of which he proceeds to drink.
• Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective — The shelf of the old club is stocked with neon colored "Ones", which Strong Bad comments "are all old and warm, and stuffed with light bulbs apparently".
• Hooked on Decemberween — Brainkrieg claims if they don't get video games for Decemberween, they'll spike Uncle Edgar's eggnog.
• I Killed Pom Pom — Marzipan mentions that she makes homemade kombucha.
• Characters from Yonder Website — The Smarty Juice's effects imply that it contains alcohol (or at least has fermented).

[edit] Beer

The Oneitude is directly proportional to the Colditude of the One.

See also Cold One

• Homestarloween Party — Pom Pom's girls are seen with beer, liquor, and other related paraphernalia.
• Dancin' Bubs — Background two includes a broken beer bottle and a beer mug.
• Email super powers — Strong Bad uses the diamond on his head to pop the cap off of a Cold One.
• Email theme party — Strong Bad suggests getting "a couple of kegs of cheap cold ones" for the party. Also, one of the Easter eggs features a "Spring Drink'n Formal 2002" T-shirt with a picture of a bear wearing sunglasses, holding a beer mug, along with Calvin, who appears to be passed out.
• Email time capsule — An Easter egg features Coach Z Ale, a brand of (presumably alcoholic) ale that is either produced or endorsed by Coach Z.
• Email theme song — In one of the clips from the "unaired pilot", Strong Bad is seen filling his mouth with a Coldson Lite and a coffee via a beer helmet.
• Email rough copy — Homestar advertises his "Malinko Drinko", claiming it is "crystal clear like domestic beer".
• Email business trip — Homestar and Strong Bad have ordered beer called "Expen$e Account Ones".
• Date Nite — Homestar and Strong Bad are shown drinking 'old Ones after Marzipan and The Cheat left for their date.
• Where's an Egg? — One of the items the suspects have is a mug of beer.
• hremail 3184 — Bubs and Coach Z watch the explosion of the Lappy 486 in lawn chairs, with beer cans.
• Poker Night at the Inventory — Strong Bad mentions that he heard the Cold Ones were pretty good at The Inventory (causing Tycho to mock "aren't you like, ten?")
• sloshy - No-stalgia — sloshy mentions "[not] meetin' old friends for beers", while the backup singer would "still like to get beers if we can".
• Disk 4 of 12 - FriendlyWare — One of the prizes of the Match game (first seen in a @StrongBadActual Tweet on 12 Dec 2020) is a six pack of Coors (alternately referred to by Strong Bad as Cold Ones).
• Email parenting — Two of the "real family restaurants" that Strong Bad considers taking his pudding baby to are a micro-brewery and a craft distillery.
• Decemberweenvent Calendar (Day 19) — Kerrek Brau is labeled as "Non-Cold Onesaholic".

[edit] Cognac

• Email modeling — "Colognac" is a portmanteau formed by combining "cognac", a distilled liquor, and "cologne", a fragrance.
• The House That Gave Sucky Treats — Coach Z raps about Hennessy, a brand of cognac.

[edit] Martinis

• Thorax Corporation—
  • Our Gentle Staph page contains the statement, "Click on a man to read his drunken ramblings."
  • Leg Delabor's page includes an animated GIF of that at one point shows a martini.
  • Leg Delabor's "Paths to Total Stardom" page states that he was drinking while thinking of new PRODUKTs.
• Meet Marshie — Marshie recommends Fluffy Puff Marshmallows over a variety of other consumables visualized on a blackboard, one of which is a martini.
• That Time of Year — Strong Bad comments about martinis going to people's heads.
• Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2 — Marzipan is drinking a "wheatgrasstini", a portmanteau of wheatgrass and martini.
• Email senior prom — Strong Bad mentions consuming "okratinis", martinis served with a pickled okra pod instead of an olive.
• SBCG4AP Dev Blog — One of Strong Bad's edited screenshots includes a "high class bikini [lady]" with a martini.

[edit] Mouthwash

"Coach Z, you oughta be ashamed of yourself."

See also Listerine

• The Best Decemberween Ever — Coach Z drinks mouthwash, offers Homestar some, and passes out at the end of the cartoon as Homestar sings "Coach Z's been drinking Listerine", an antiseptic mouthwash that contains alcohol.
  • Coach Z is also seen spiking the punch with Listerine in senior prom.
• Decemberween Short Shorts — In the last short, Coach Z is seen inebriated by Listerine.

[edit] Wine

• Email making out — In order to get the sender's boyfriend to make out with her, Strong Bad proposes lighting "a few candles and maybe having a glass of wine".
• Email the show — The character on the "We'll be right back" screen holds a wine glass.
• Email different town (Easter egg) — A drawing of Eh! Steve! drinking from a wine glass can be seen.
• Email dangeresque 3 — Strong Bad asks the viewer not to throw "full wine bottles" at the screen.
• Email montage — Strong Bad and the Wagon Fulla Pancakes drink wine on a boat in the lake.
• Email rock opera — Strong Bad swirls a glass of wine as he informs the viewers that he is "pleasant".
• Videlectrix — The Game Gallery has a picture of a glass of wine and cheese.
• New Boots — Powered by The Cheat Strong Bad made The Cheat's favorite: a picnic plate with wine and a baguette.
• Drive-Thru — Strong Bad asks "Inviso-Jeeves" for a bottle of Château Prétende 1974, presumably wine.
• Baddest of the Bands — A bottle of wine sits on a table at Club Technochocolate.
• Disk 4 of 12 - Vampire's Castle — After finding wine and cheese in the castle study, Strong Bad suggests that the Vampire will be having a wine tasting later. After winning the game, he and The Cheat have a wine tasting in the Alchemist's laboratory with the members of Ratt.

[edit] See Also

• Cold One
• Listerine