Dangeresque Roomisode 2: The Intersection of Doom & Boom Responses

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A list of responses shared to @StrongBadActual

These are all of the responses in Dangeresque Roomisode 2: The Intersection of Doom & Boom.

Spoiler warning: Plot or ending details follow.

Contents

[edit] Intro

{Picking up where Roomisode 1 left off}

{Zoom in on Dangeresque. Dangeresque screams and falls. Dang-car-esque is driving in the street below. The trunk opens and Dangeresque falls into it. Inside the car, Renaldo scoots aside so Dangeresque can take the wheel.}
DANGERESQUE: Nice catch, Renaldo.
RENALDO: Anytime, Dangeresque.
{The car shakes and makes ugly noises}
DANGERESQUE: Uh oh. Sounds like engine trouble.
{Cut to the streets}
RENALDO: Pull over at this intersection.
{The car stops. The hood is smoking.}

{Cut to the intersection. Renaldo is in the car. Dangeresque is outside.}
DANGERESQUE: 50 year-old automobiles don't just "break down." Something's suspicious, Renaldo.
RENALDO: Ya probably just need to replace the 70's shaft. Porp the hood and take a lork!

[edit] Intersection

[edit] Back Bumper

{In order}
RENALDO: Bump!
{Out of order}
DANGERESQUE: {kicks it, it doesn't open} I don't think I did it right.

[edit] Back Hubcap

{In order}
RENALDO: {after hood opens} Hey, ya did it! {rapping} A hub-bump to the front and a bump-hub to the back! Open up the hood so we can attack... the automotive issues.. at hand.
{Out of order}
DANGERESQUE: {kicks it, it doesn't open} I don't think I did it right.

[edit] Front Bumper

{In order}
RENALDO: Bump!
{Out of order}
DANGERESQUE: {kicks it, it doesn't open} I don't think I did it right.

[edit] Front Hubcap

{In order}
RENALDO: Hub!
{Out of order}
DANGERESQUE: {kicks it, it doesn't open} I don't think I did it right.

[edit] Cold Ones Sign

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: That place only serves semi-premium watery domestic cold ones. It's the true mark of a quality establishment.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: This case has gone COLD. Ones.

[edit] Get/Use

{If the sign is on}
DANGERESQUE: {turns sign off} That'll teach this bar to put its signs on the outside of its windows.

{If the sign is off}
DANGERESQUE: {turns sign on} Let the light of Cold Ones shine unto the world yet again.

[edit] Anything → Cold Ones Sign

DANGERESQUE: The cold ones sign doesn't need to be involved with that particular item.

[edit] Tire Iron → Cold Ones Sign

{If the sign is on}
DANGERESQUE: Wanton destruction is the pinnacle!
{Dangeresque smashes the sign with the tire iron.}

{If the sign is already turned off}
DANGERESQUE: It's already turned off. No need for smash-em-ups.

[edit] Dangeresque

[edit] Look

{On the street}
DANGERESQUE: I look alone! Except when I look with Renaldo!
RENALDO: Which is all the time!
DANGERESQUE: Dangeresque!

{In the sewer}
DANGERESQUE: My overbelly looks appropriately seedy here in the seedy underbelly of Brainblow City.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to talk to myself. I've got my trusty Renaldo with me.
RENALDO: And I'm a fortain of greart cornversation!

{When Renaldo is panicking}
DANGERESQUE: I don't need to talk to myself. I've got my trusty Renaldo with me.
RENALDO: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE ON THE TERLET!!

{In the sewer}
DANGERESQUE: I don't need to talk to myself. I've got my trusty Renaldo with me. Oh, wait.

[edit] Get/Use

{Dangeresque spins around and stops with a pose to the camera accompanied with a "ding" sound. This finishing pose has him smiling proudly with his gloves on his hips.}
DANGERESQUE: Hee hee!

[edit] Air Freshener → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: I used to wear an air freshener shaped like a lightning bolt as a necklace. It smelled like aluminum foil and blood!

[edit] Air Freshener (scented) → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: {head spinning} WHOOA that's strong!

[edit] Antenna → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: I don't wanna take it outta my pants because then I have to think about when it went into my pants.

[edit] Busted Tape → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: Just cause I can type with boxing gloves doesn't mean I can wind busted tapes up with boxing gloves. Maybe if I had fingers.

[edit] Colognac → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: Naw, I'm already wearing enough to kill a small horse.
RENALDO: That happened once!

[edit] Fast Food → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: As much as I want to devour this perfectly aged fast food, I can prolly find a better use for it.

[edit] Fixed Tape → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: I should get Naldo Naldo to put this in the tape deck tape deck.

[edit] Guide → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: Alright, let's see what this thing says...
{Dangeresque reads the instructions on the guide.}
{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: Step one: CUT THE WIRES in the following order: BLUE RED GREEN. Step two: Short circuit the bomb stuff. {sarcastically} That's specific. Step three: Congratulations, you're still alive! Enjoy a delicious meal! {reads disclaimer quickly} Warning: Once you've cut the first wire a thirty second countdown will commence. Get movin'!

[edit] Meltshake Cup → Dangeresque

{When empty}
DANGERESQUE: I wish there were some Reesy Cup dregs in here but I think that raccoonolith got every drop.

{When filled with sewer water}
DANGERESQUE: I AM pretty thirsty. I bet a little sip a dip wouldn't hurt.
{Dangeresque sips up the water. He grunts painfully as he mutates into the monstrosity from animal.}

{On the street}
RENALDO: I say there, Dangerstrosity, do you know the times?
{He changes back to normal}
DANGERESQUE: I did! I DID know the times! 2:34 and 8:15!

{In the sewer}
{He changes back to normal}
DANGERESQUE: Phew! That was one potent potable!
ELECTRICIAN: Cool, cool. Scarred for life, cool.

{During the bomb countdown}
DANGERESQUE: I don't have time for sips of grodywater right now!

[edit] Other Things → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: I'm not using that this with this that!

[edit] Party Mix → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: Where IS that tape!
RENALDO: I think you're holdin it dare, D-Buckets.
DANGERESQUE: Right. Thought I was on a different case for a second there.

[edit] Tire Iron → Dangeresque

DANGERESQUE: {waving tire iron around} Hee hee!

[edit] Drain

[edit] Look

{Before losing the manual}
DANGERESQUE: Oh gutter drain, how many tennis balls and frisbees have you claimed?

{After losing the manual}
DANGERESQUE: My Bomb Defuser's Quickstart Guide went down there!

[edit] Talk To

{Before losing the manual}
DANGERESQUE: Helloooooo down there.
ELECTRICIAN: {from inside drain} Sup?
DANGERESQUE: {jumping} AHHH!

{After losing the manual}
DANGERESQUE: Hey! Subhuman sewer mutants! Can you pass me up my quickstart guide?
ELECTRICIAN: {from inside drain} Come down and get it yourself, surfaceling!

{After speaking with the electrician}
DANGERESQUE: Hey! Dumpy Electrician! You done yet?
ELECTRICIAN: {from inside drain} Nope! That building's still pullin too much power!

{When all the power is off}
DANGERESQUE: Hey! Dumpy Electrician! You done yet?
ELECTRICIAN: {from inside drain} Maybe! But I can't check right now! I'd have to file a Talk Thru Drain work order first. Come down and see me.

{When the electrician leaves}
DANGERESQUE: I think that paperwork obsessed contractor is gone now.

[edit] Get/Use

{Before opening the sewer cap}
DANGERESQUE: My voluptuous head and hands prevent me from reaching in there. And wearing turtlenecks.

{When the sewer hole is open}
DANGERESQUE: I can just climb into the sewer hole now.

[edit] Anything → Drain

{Before losing the manual}
DANGERESQUE: I don't want to put nothin down there. Y'know cause-a like, clown murder joke... balloon.

{After losing the manual}
DANGERESQUE: I don't wanna lose anything else down there!

[edit] Finger Sign

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: {reading} WORK FROM HOME! EARN EXTRA CASH! BE MY OWN BOSS?! Sorry pointy finger sign, already waaaay ahead of ya.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: MAYBE DON'T USE ALL CAPS NEXT TIME!! IT READS LIKE YOU'RE YELLING AT ME!!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I'll leave it here. I think it'll do more good where it is.

[edit] Anything → Finger Sign

DANGERESQUE: That doesn't need to work from home and earn extra cash.

[edit] Busted Tape → Finger Sign

DANGERESQUE: I may not have fingers to wind this busted tape up with... but this pyramid scheme does!
{Dangeresque puts the tape on the finger and spins it around, repairing the tape.}
DANGERESQUE: Yes! It's unjagled! Good as 1989!

[edit] Fixed Tape → Finger Sign

DANGERESQUE: It's already fixed. I don't wanna overwind!

[edit] Guy in Bar

[edit] Look

{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: Check it out! That guy's playing Rig Rug! One of my all time fave arcade games! Wish this bar had a door so I could go play it.

DANGERESQUE: He's still Riggin' Rugs.

{After speaking with the electrician}
DANGERESQUE: He looks like he's taking a break from playing that game.

[edit] Talk To

{Before checking under the hood}
DANGERESQUE: Hey, Arcade Guy! You know anything about cars?
ARCADE GUY: Not now! I'm trying to beat the high score in Rig Rug! Maybe check back later!

{After checking under the hood}
DANGERESQUE: Hey, Arcade Guy! You know how to defuse a bomb?
ARCADE GUY: Not now! I'm trying to beat the high score in Rig Rug! Maybe check back later!
{Continues below after speaking with Renaldo, but before speaking with the electrician}
DANGERESQUE: Ooh, I know a cool cheat code you could try.
ARCADE GUY: I said later! Rug Riggin' is Lyfe!

{After speaking with the electrician}
{Can you unplug?}
DANGERESQUE: Hey Arcade Guy. Can you unplug your game? The electric man in the sewer says you're pullin too much power.
ARCADE GUY: While that IS a fantastic explanation, I can't stop. That high score is so close! I can almost taste the rigid corners of its pixelated font!
DANGERESQUE: Eww. Well, if I catch you lickin that screen I'm reporting you to the Creepo Unit.
ARCADE GUY: I have definitely never done that. Today.

{If Dangeresque hasn't checked him first}
{Watcha Playin?}
DANGERESQUE: Hey Arcade Guy, what game are you playin?
ARCADE GUY: I'm trying to get the high score on Rig Rug! Now lemee lone!
{After talking to Renaldo}
{Hold UP + Player 2}
DANGERESQUE: Hey Arcade Guy! I heard about this amazing cheat code for Rig Rug! It'll help you get the high score!
ARCADE GUY: No way! A cheat code I haven't heard of? That's unheard of! By me. Cause I haven't heard of it.
DANGERESQUE: Yeah, I got that. Wanna hear it or not?
ARCADE GUY: Paste it on me!
DANGERESQUE: So, on the stage select screen... if you hold UP and the Player 2 button, it gives you a hundred thousand bonus points!
ARCADE GUY: WHAT?! I gotta try it!
{He tries it.}
ARCADE GUY: AHHH! The game crashed and turned off!! Also, AHHH! The Feds!!
{A hand pulls the Arcade Guy away. Glass crashes, and the lights in the bar go out.}
DANGERESQUE: {laughing} Heh heh. Thanks for the tip Renaldo!
RENALDO: Poor fella. I'm gonna miss his silhouetted shenanigans.

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I can't do much but yell at him through the window.

[edit] Anything → Guy in Bar

DANGERESQUE: I'm not wastin this on some silhouette guy.

{After talking to electrician}
DANGERESQUE: That's not gonna get him to turn off the power.

[edit] Busted Tape → Guy in Bar

DANGERESQUE: Hey Arcade Guy! Can you help me fix this tape?
ARCADE GUY: You just wind it back up! But I don't have a pencil on me and I can't spare a finger right now.

[edit] Fixed Tape → Guy in Bar

DANGERESQUE: Say, Arcade Guy, you clearly enjoy outdated electronics. Want this old cassette tape?
ARCADE GUY: Lemee lone! I'm Rigging so many Rugs right now!
{After talking to the electrician}
DANGERESQUE: Hey, wanna trade? This cassette tape for you shutting off that game!
ARCADE GUY: And lose all my progress? No chance!

[edit] Hood

[edit] Look

{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: {tries to open hood, but fails} Crumpdingle! I forgot the secret trick that pops the hood.
RENALDO: HUB-BUMP to the front and BUMP-HUB to the back!

DANGERESQUE: It's no use. I need to use the secret trick to open it.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Open up! It's me! Dangeresque! Guess it's not voice-activated.

[edit] Get/Use

{Same as "Look"}

[edit] Anything → Hood

DANGERESQUE: That won't help me porp the hood. Er, POP the hood.
RENALDO: Now you're torkin'!

[edit] Meltshake Cup

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's a chewed up meltshake cup fulla teeth holes.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Your story's fulla holes meltshake! I'm shakin' you down!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: All's he left of my combo meal is an empty Meltshake cup.
{Dangeresque puts the cup in his inventory}
DANGERESQUE: And the pressure plate is stuck now.

[edit] Anything → Meltshake Cup

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to use that with the Meltshake cup!

[edit] Air Freshener or Colognac → Meltshake Cup

DANGERESQUE: I'm not puttin that in the Meltshake cup.

[edit] Tire Iron → Meltshake Cup

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to pry the Meltshake off the ground. I'm highly trained in the art of "pick stuff up".

[edit] Niiice Ride

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Now that is a niiiice ride.
RENALDO: You said it, Dangeresque. And lookit that antenna! You think they can pick up the Ola Toya fight on that thing?

[edit] Talk To

{If Strong Bad is holding the pressure plate, the car will drive off before he can speak with it.}

{When the car is stopped}
{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: Hey! Do you know how to defuse a bomb? We need some help here.
DRIVER: You need help?! I got a sick pet in here that sick petted all over the place! The smell is pretendous! I've been drivin around the block tryin to air it out but it's no use! Gimme good smells and you can have my busted antenna.

DANGERESQUE: What's the deal with your incredibly nondescript pet again?
DRIVER: It got nondescriptly sick all over my interior and now it descriptly stinks.

[edit] Get/Use

{Dangeresque kicks the car}
DRIVER: HEY!!
DANGERESQUE: Oops. Sorry. Forgot which car this was.

[edit] Anything → Niiice Ride

DANGERESQUE: Waste of time, that. I won't do it

[edit] Air Freshener → Niiice Ride

DANGERESQUE: Will this old air freshener help with your pet stank?
DRIVER: Hmm. I do need an air freshener. Gettin pretty ripe in here. But that piece of crap doesn't even smell like a piece of crap!

[edit] Air Freshener (scented) → Niiice Ride

{If Dangeresque didn't speak with the driver first}
DANGERESQUE: Would you care for a freshly scented air freshener?
DRIVER: Uh, kinda. But why are you just giving it to me?
DANGERESQUE: I dunno. Guess I'm just kinda tryin stuff at this point.
DRIVER: Well, I'll take it but only if you get that busted old antenna off my car in trade.
DANGERESQUE: Sure! That thing rules!
{Dangeresque puts the antenna in his inventory with a grunt. A CENSORED box covers him.}
DRIVER: See ya!
{The green car drives off.}

{If Dangeresque did speak with the driver first}
DANGERESQUE: Would this freshly scented air freshener help with your stank situation?
DRIVER: Whoa! Smell that dankitude! That's what I need! give it here!
{Dangeresque hands over the air freshener.}
DRIVER: The antenna's all yours. Take it so I can run this red light and get my nondescript pet to a vague veterinarian!
{Dangeresque puts the antenna in his inventory with a grunt. A CENSORED box covers him.}
DRIVER: See ya!
{The green car drives off.}

[edit] Colognac → Niiice Ride

DANGERESQUE: Can I interest you in this finest colognac?
DRIVER: Hmm. I dig that scent but I don't really need a whole bottle of colognac.

[edit] Fixed Tape → Niiice Ride

DANGERESQUE: You need a rehabilitated tape of SLOW JAMZ?
DRIVER: Tapes? I love tradin tapes! I'll trade you this Rock Spotty Party Mix for your Slow Jamz.
DANGERESQUE: Oh. Uh, okay. That wasn't really what I was trying to-
{The swap is made.}
DRIVER: Thanks!

[edit] Meltshake → Niiice Ride

DANGERESQUE: Say driverman, you want this hole-y meltshake cup?
DRIVER: Holy? I don't care if it's blessed by St. Pod himself! I don't want it!

[edit] Party Mix → Niiice Ride

DRIVER: Hey! No tradebacks!

[edit] Tire Iron → Niiice Ride

DANGERESQUE: Want me to ding this up for ya? The "distressed" look is all the rage right now.
{He waves the tire iron around.}
DRIVER: I hear the "brain flattened on asphalt" look is also popular.
DANGERESQUE: Understood. Good bumper. Who's a good bumper?

[edit] Antenna

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: That thing's incredible! I bet they've got a TV in that car. Can you imagine? Televised visions? INSIDE an automobile?!

[edit] Talk

DANGERESQUE: Don't you wanna come live on my car? I'll treat you real nice.
DRIVER: Stop hitting on inanimate objects!
DANGERESQUE: Yeah it's kind of a problem I have.

[edit] Get/Use

DRIVER: HEY! Leave that alone!
DANGERESQUE: But I want it cause it's awesome.
DRIVER: Actually it's been busted for a while. If ya can help me get ridda the pet stink in here, it's all yours.

[edit] Air Freshener → Antenna

{Music begins playing}
DANGERESQUE: It's not such a bad antenna. Maybe all it needs is a little love.
{Dangeresque ties the air freshener to the antenna. The antenna droops dramatically.}
DANGERESQUE: I've killed it.
DRIVER: Get that thing off my antenna!!
{Dangeresque removes it. The antenna returns to normal.}
{If the air freshener was scented, continues below}
DRIVER: Didn't smell half bad, actually.

[edit] Anything → Antenna

DANGERESQUE: That will not help in any way whatsoever.

[edit] Colognac → Antenna

DRIVER: Hey! Whattaya doin?
DANGERESQUE: Logic dictated that I douse your antenna in high octane colognac.
DRIVER: Logic gonna dictate that I run you over if you don't cut it out. I do like that Dungeonmusk scent, though.

[edit] Tire Iron or Wire Cutters → Antenna

DANGERESQUE: If I want this antenna, I need to find a different solution.

[edit] Pressure Plate

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's the metal plate that changes the light if a car stops on it.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Hey pressure plate, no PRESSURE, but can you change the stop light?

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: Let's see if I can activate this thing.
{Dangeresque jumps on the plate. The light turns red and a green car drives in.}
{As soon as Dangeresque steps off, the light changes and the green car drives off.}

[edit] Anything → Pressure Plate

{Dangeresque places the item on the plate}
DANGERESQUE: It doesn't weigh enough to change the light.

[edit] Busted Tape → Pressure Plate

DANGERESQUE: I should fix this tape before I do anything else with it.

[edit] Fast Food → Pressure Plate

{Dangeresque places the item on the plate}
DANGERESQUE: It doesn't weigh enough to change the light.
{The trash can begins to shake violently.}
DANGERESQUE: Uh oh. I think the call of the Blubb-O's whale summmoned another leviathan!
{A large raccoon, the Raccoonolith, trots out leisurely from the trash can. It eats the fast food greedily, weighing down the pressure plate. A green car drives up and stops.}
DANGERESQUE: Hot styles! That raccoonolith triggered the stop light! Now I can safely cross over to that sewer cap!
{The Raccoonolith finishes eating and returns to its trash can. A fast food drink cup is all that is left behind. The pressure plate remains pressed down, keeping the light changed and the car stopped.}

[edit] Paperclip → Pressure Plate

DANGERESQUE: Bad idea.

[edit] Tire Iron → Pressure Plate

{Dangeresque places the item weighing down the pressure plate}
DANGERESQUE: There's nothin quite like placing items on a metal plate embedded in the asphalt.
RENALDO: You said it, D-Launch! That's my childhood right there!

[edit] Renaldo

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. Or "The Green Liability" as he's known in some circles.

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. The Watson to my Holmes. Or Graham Bell. Wait, were those the same Watsons?

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. Or "The One-Man Two-Problem" as they called him in the Navy.

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. "The Human Frazzled Nerve".

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. Or "The Hostage in Waiting" as they call him down at the precinct.

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. The side-iest of sidekicks.

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. Or "The Human Leftovers Smell" as his roommates know him.

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. Or "The Known Circle" as he's known in some circles.

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. Or "The Human That One Hard Burnt French Fry At The Bottom" as his parole officer lovingly dubbed him.

DANGERESQUE: Good ol' Renaldo. Or "The Syracuse Scrumbler" as he was known in Division 4 ball.
{After going through all the nicknames}
DANGERESQUE: I think that's all the nicknames. The ones that won't get him in legal trouble, anyways.

{While Renaldo is panicking}
DANGERESQUE: He looks pretty frazzled. Maybe a li'l zazzled?

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Say, 'Naldo...
RENALDO: What is it?

DANGERESQUE: Say, 'Naldo...
RENALDO: What IS it?

DANGERESQUE: Say, 'Naldo...
RENALDO: What is IT?

DANGERESQUE: Say, 'Naldo...
RENALDO: Whaaaat izzit?

DANGERESQUE: Say, 'Naldo...
RENALDO: What would you like, man?!

{Before popping the hood}

{Open the Hood}
{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: Do you remember how to open the hood?
RENALDO: Didn't we come up with a dope beat to remind us? Hub-bump, to the front! Bump-hub, to the back! Somethin' like that?
DANGERESQUE: Thanks. We'll debate your definition of dopeness later.

DANGERESQUE: Do you remember how to open the hood?
RENALDO: HUB-BUMP to the front! BUMP-HUB to the back!

{What are we doing?}
DANGERESQUE: What are we doin again?
RENALDO: You're supposed to be figuring out what's wrong with ol' Dangecaresque here.
DANGERESQUE: Oh right. I'ma dodat.
{While frazzled}
{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: Hey Renaldo, I need to get that quickstart guide from the sewer. Any ideas?
RENALDO: {panicking} Save yourself, Dangeresque! I buried 14 bucks in change in my backyard. It's all yours! Take it and run! Start a new life somewhere!
DANGERESQUE: The panic has clearly made him delusional. The "14 bucks" are a couple subway tokens and half a Rif Simken rookie card.

DANGERESQUE: Hey Renaldo, I need to get that quickstart guide from the sewer. Any ideas?
RENALDO: {panicking} Save yourself, Dangeresque!
{After losing the manual}
{What are we doing?}
DANGERESQUE: What are we doin again?
RENALDO: You gotta get that quickstart guide out the sewer!
DANGERESQUE: Oh, right. I'ma dodat.

{Remember Rig Rug?}
DANGERESQUE: That bar over there's got a Rig Rug machine!
RENALDO: Rig Rug? Isn't that the game that would shut itself orf and alert the Feds if you held UP and the PLAYER 2 button during the STAGE SELECT screen?
DANGERESQUE: Um, I guess. That's a very specific memory, Renaldo.
RENALDO: It's no joke. I lost a coupla friends to Rig Rug that way. And don't get me started on Pooyan!
DANGERESQUE: I definitely will not.

{After the electrician leaves}
{That toolbox}
DANGERESQUE: I can't get that blasted toolbox open, Renaldo! It's got like, little stars for the combination instead of numbers! What type-a crap is that?
RENALDO: Stairs, you say? How many points has a stair?
DANGERESQUE: Uh, whattaya talk?
RENALDO: I dunno. Just some lyrics I heard once. Thought they was poetical!
DANGERESQUE: You're a real help, Renaldo.
{After the manual is retrieved}
{What are we doing?}
DANGERESQUE: What are we doin again?
RENALDO: You gotta use that guide to defuse this BAERM!
DANGERESQUE: Oh, right. I'ma dodat.

[edit] Get/Use

{Before popping the hood}
DANGERESQUE: I need you to check inside the car.
RENALDO: You should prally look under the hood first.

{While Renaldo is panicking}
DANGERESQUE: Renaldo's of no use to me in this state. I need to calm him down somehow.

{After being calmed}
DANGERESQUE: I need you to check inside the car.
RENALDO: Ha-roo got it, D-Large.

[edit] Anything → Renaldo

{Before checking under the hood}
RENALDO: Not now, Dangeresque! You should check under the hood first!

{While in a panic}
DANGERESQUE: That's not gonna calm him down!

{While calmed down}
RENALDO: Naw I don't need that so much.

[edit] Busted Tape → Renaldo

DANGERESQUE: Here, Renaldo. Have some slow jamz to soothe your troubled styles.
RENALDO: Slow jamz are a good idea but that jangled mess is useless!

[edit] Fixed Tape → Renaldo

DANGERESQUE: Take 30 cc's of these slow jamz, STAT!
RENALDO: {panicking} Give a here!
{Dangeresque hands over the tape. Cut to inside the car. Renaldo puts the tape in. Tenerence Love's Sweaty Overweight Jamz begin playing.}
{Back to the street}
RENALDO: {calming down} Aaaah! Now that's the stuff! Sorry for freakin out on ya there, Big D! Now let's defuse that baerm!
DANGERESQUE: Looks like he's back to normal.
RENALDO: {singing} Brah-ding brah-dang brah-doirng!
DANGERESQUE: At least, 'Naldo normo.

[edit] Guide → Renaldo

RENALDO: You should read it yourself, Dangeresque.

[edit] Tire Iron → Renaldo

DANGERESQUE: Wanna play a round of Fez Lopper like we used ta? {waves tire iron around}
RENALDO: Ooh, I'm a sit this one out. I finally just regained all the childhood memories I lost the last time we played. Turns out I'm adorpted!

[edit] Sewer Cap

{If the stoplight hasn't been changed, a car will drive past.}

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: All Brainblow City sewer caps are required to be "mutant pet flushed down the toilet" proof.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Open up, it's the almost police! Oh well. Worth a shot.

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: {fails to lift the cap} Ergh! Dang! Thing's heavy! Gonna need some help if I wanna get down there.

[edit] Anything → Sewer Cap

DANGERESQUE: That non-specific item won't help me get this sewer cap off.

[edit] Tire Iron → Sewer Cap

DANGERESQUE: Let's do it, Tire Iron!
{Dangeresque uses the tire iron to pry the sewer cap open. The cover flies off-screen.}
DANGERESQUE: I'm sure that Jewelry Store across the street didn't need that plate glass display window anyways.

[edit] Stoplight

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's green for cross traffic, makin it dangerous to cross... traffic.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: IF I CAN CHANGE, YOU CAN CHANGE, TRAFFIC LIGHT!

[edit] Get/Use

{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: There's no crosswalk button thing. Maybe somethin else changes it.

{Dangeresque moves behind the stoplight so it looks like his head is the stoplight.}
DANGERESQUE: Oh check me out, I'm Stoplight Head! Disrupter of traffic patterns! Bane of the DOT!

[edit] Anything → Stoplight

DANGERESQUE: That's not gonna help me change the light.

[edit] Street

{If the light has not been changed}
{Chosen in order}
{A green car drives by.}
DANGERESQUE: Whoadang! That car came out of nowhere.

{The car drives by again.}
DANGERESQUE: Must be doin' laps around the block.

DANGERESQUE: That car is a menace to my style!

DANGERESQUE: Next time I'm just gonna stand in the road!

{bip}
{Cut to the same scene with Strong Sad standing in Dangeresque's place as his stunt double, wearing only a paper bag with a crude drawing of Strong Bad's face over his head. The car quickly drives by and hits him, flinging him out of the scene while he yells. Game over.}

[edit] Streetlight

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Just a city streetlight. Born and raised in {singing uncertainly} South Detrite?

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Are you one of them "streetlight people" I've heard so much about?

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I can't reach that thing. I've got a great vertical leap when it comes to case files. But I'm useless with streetlights.

[edit] Anything → Streetlight

DANGERESQUE: Look, that's just not gonna help.

[edit] Antenna → Streetlight

DANGERESQUE: That could probably reach the streetlight. But I don't think it would shut it off. More like electrocute me.

[edit] Chunk Rock → Streetlight

{Dangeresque throws the rock at the light. The light breaks.}
DANGERESQUE: Yeah! THAT'S how a body chunks a rock!

[edit] Tire Iron → Streetlight

{Dangeresque waves the tire iron around.}
DANGERESQUE: I like smashin stuff, but I can't reach it.

[edit] Street Debris

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's the little fruit salad of hood ornaments and bits of brake light that forms in the middle of intersections. Prolly a Sniglet for it, but I can't remember.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: I'm here to clean up these mean streets!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: The only thing worth its style in this pile is an old air freshener. Lost all its smell though.
{Dangeresque picks up the air freshener and puts it in his inventory}

[edit] Anything → Street Debris

DANGERESQUE: I don't wanna add to the pile.

[edit] Street Hole

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Sewer hole? More like a street hole.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Hang on Quickstart Guide! I'm coming for ya!

{After getting the guide}
DANGERESQUE: Let's hope these sewers are still C.H.U.D. free since '93!

[edit] Get/Use

{Dangeresque leaps down the hole. He lands inside the sewer.}

[edit] Anything → Street Hole

DANGERESQUE: I don't wanna drop that nonspecific item in the sewer.

[edit] Tire Iron

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: THAT'S where my tire iron got to! I haven't had to bust this thing out in a while. Not since out run-in with Killingyouguy and his sister Rackingyougal.
RENALDO: Now SHE knew a thing or two about a three or four if ya know what I mean.
DANGERESQUE: Um... I don't... know what you mean.
RENALDO: Nor I, Big Desque, nor I.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: The whole precinct's gettin' real TIRED of you, IRON! Hand in your badge!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: C'mere you! Let's do some damage together!
{Dangeresque puts the tire iron in his inventory.}

[edit] Anything → Tire Iron

DANGERESQUE: I should prolly just GET it, no?

[edit] Trash Can

[edit] Look

{Before checking}
DANGERESQUE: Looks full to burstin.

{After being checked}
DANGERESQUE: Something LARGE dwelleth therein.

{After using the Fast Food}
DANGERESQUE: The Raccoonolith is asleep in there.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Your trash is grash!

{After using the Fast Food}
DANGERESQUE: Good night, sweet racoonolith. And flights of Blubb-O's whales sing thee to thy rest.

[edit] Get/Use

{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: Looks like I'm gonna have to jump... inthistrashcan!
{jumps in, back out}
DANGERESQUE: Uh, there was something BIG in there. It did NOT like me invading its home. But check it out! I found this tape of SLOW JAMZ! Someone trashed it because it's broken and doesn't work anymore!
{Dangeresque puts the Slow Jamz in his inventory}

DANGERESQUE: I just like the warm fuzzy feeling I get when I leap in the trash.
{jumps in, back out}
DANGERESQUE: I think the warm fuzzy feeling just tried to bite me.

{After the Raccoonolith has been fed}
DANGERESQUE: Naw, I can hear him snoozin in there. Or maybe he just ate the kids meal toy. I think it was a wind-up Potato Nudule.

[edit] Air Freshener → Trash Can

DANGERESQUE: No way! This air freshener is mid-intersection gold!

[edit] Air Freshener (scented) → Trash Can

DANGERESQUE: Naw, this trash already smells surprisingly good. Like a burst ketchup packet that just got done mowin the early spring lawn.
RENALDO: Gee, Dangeresque! That's like poetry!

[edit] Busted Tape → Trash Can

DANGERESQUE: I just found that thing in there! I'm not givin it back!

[edit] Fixed Tape → Trash Can

DANGERESQUE: I'm not throwin this back in there! I just fixed it! It was like a whole puzzle!

[edit] Meltshake → Trash Can

DANGERESQUE: Naw, there's prolly a reason why he left it behind.

[edit] Ol' Fast Food → Trash Can

{The trash can shakes violently.}
DANGERESQUE: I don't think I wanna throw this in there. Might lose a glove.

[edit] Anything Else → Trash Can

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to throw that away.

[edit] Using Two Inventory Items Together

DANGERESQUE: This ain't no crafting game! This is a Use Inventory Item on Stuff In Scene Game!

DANGERESQUE: You try combining inventory items in your pants!

DANGERESQUE: You can't combine stuff! Just think of the monstrosities you could create! A taperclip?! Unholy!!

DANGERESQUE: Brainblow City has a strict No Combining Items law. It's one of the few I actually follow.

DANGERESQUE: {sarcastically} Hey! You found the one item combination that actually works! Or I'm lying and you're a terrible listener.

[edit] Engine

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Alright, let's see what's bothering ol' Dangercaresque.
{Close up under the hood. There is a bomb wired to the engine.}
DANGERESQUE: Holy crap! It's a bomb!!
{Cut to a title screen}
ANNOUNCER: Roomisode 2: The Intersection of Doom & Boom!
{Back to the street}
RENALDO: {panicking} A BAERMB! We're done for! I always knew I was gonna die on the terlet!
DANGERESQUE: Uh, you're sitting in my car.
RENALDO: Oh, right. Of course. Uh, nevermind.
DANGERESQUE: Don't worry, Renaldo. Dangeresque is always prepared for danger...ish scenarios. There's a laminated Bomb Defuser's Quickstart Guide in the car. Just hand it to me and we'll--
RENALDO: {panicking} BLAAAH! Here you go, Dangerish!
{The manual comes flying out of the car. Dangeresque leaps to catch it but it falls down the drain.}
DANGERESQUE: *Sigh* b/w {pronounced "backed with"} *shrug*. Sit tight, Renaldo. We don't know what might trigger this thing.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Don't worry engine! I'll save your 2-valve single cylinder self!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: Let's peep this bomb.
{The Engine is opened}

[edit] Anything → Engine

DANGERESQUE: That will probably jut blow us up.

[edit] A/C Fluid Intake

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Dangecaresque has a custom A/C that I can pour anything in to use as coolant.

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: It's already open. If I wanna use it I need to put somethin IN it.

[edit] Anything → A/C Fluid Intake

DANGERESQUE: That's not helping!

[edit] Colognac → A/C Fluid Intake

DANGERESQUE: Sure. Thy Dungeonmusk makes a great freon substitute.
{The colognac is poured into the intake.}

[edit] Meltshake → A/C Fluid Intake

{When empty}
DANGERESQUE: Cup's empty. I WISH I could make my air conditioning be Reesy Cup Meltshake scented, though.

{When full of sewer water}
DANGERESQUE: Eww! No way! I don't want the whole car smellin like grodywater! It already smells like Renaldowater, which is bad enough.

[edit] Bomb Stuff

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's the bomb's detonator. Doesn't look like there's a timer running which is at least somethin.

[edit] Get/Use

{While Renaldo is panicking}
DANGERESQUE: I shouldn't mess with any of this until I get Renaldo chillèd down.
{After calming Renaldo}
DANGERESQUE: {sarcastically} Yeah, this is definitely a good idea. I should just start messin with it.
{Dangeresque begins tampering with the bomb. It explodes violently, obliterating the car and knocking Dangereseque out of the scene. Game over.}

[edit] Anything → Bomb Stuff

DANGERESQUE: That'll probably just trigger the bomb.

[edit] Colognac → Bomb Stuff

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to make the bomb smell good before it murders me.

[edit] Fast Food → Bomb Stuff

DANGERESQUE: That's a terrible idea and would never help in a million years.

[edit] Guide → Bomb Stuff

DANGERESQUE: I should just read the guide. It'll tell me what to do with this stuff.

[edit] Meltshake → Bomb Stuff

{Before getting the Guide}
DANGERESQUE: I shouldn't try using other stuff with the bomb stuff until I get my Quickstart Guide back.

{Before cutting the wires}
DANGERESQUE: I guess this is what the quickstart guide said to do? I sorta skimmed it.
{The car blows up. Game over.}

{When empty}
DANGERESQUE: An empty meltshake cup does not a bomb defuse.

{When filled with water}
{A drumroll plays as the water is poured on. The bomb shorts out and the screen reads "Defuse"}
DANGERESQUE: I did it! I defused the bomb!
RENALDO: You did it, Dangeresque! You saved us!
DANGERESQUE: Aw, it was nothin, Renaldo. Just another day in the life of a--
RENALDO: Oh hey, looky dare. {turns a page} There was a cover page of that Quickstaert Guide in here all along.
{Renaldo reads the cover page}
RENDALO: Impratant. Before you begin, rub a bag of GREASY FAST FOOD over all components of the baermb. If ya skip this step, the bomb will appear to disarm but explode a few seconds later.
{Back to the street}
RENALDO: Huh. Well ain't that somethin.
DANGERESQUE: SHUT UP AND RUN, IDIOT!!
{To the ending}

[edit] Wire Cutters → Bomb Stuff

DANGERESQUE: They're not called Bomb Detonator Display Thingy Cutters! They're called WIRE cutters!

[edit] Blue Wire

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Ah, the infamous "blue one".

[edit] Get/Use

{Before reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I shouldn't mess with these wires until I have that Bomb Defuser's Quickstart Guide.

{After reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I should just do what the Quickstart Guide told me.

[edit] Anything → Blue Wire

DANGERESQUE: That's prolly just gonna get me blowed up.

{After reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I really just need to find something to cut these wires.

[edit] Wire Cutters → Blue Wire

{If the Quickstart Guide was not obtained}
DANGERESQUE: The Quickstart Guide'll tell me what to do.

{First wire cut, regardless of order}
DANGERESQUE: Alright, here goes somethin!
{The wire is cut and the countdown begins.}

[edit] Green Wire

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Once again, you can't beat the mouseover text: Green Wire.

[edit] Get/Use

{Before reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I shouldn't mess with these wires until I have that Bomb Defuser's Quickstart Guide.

{After reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I should just do what the Quickstart Guide told me.

[edit] Anything → Green Wire

DANGERESQUE: That's prolly just gonna get me blowed up.

{After reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I really just need to find something to cut these wires.

[edit] Wire Cutters → Green Wire

{If the wrong wire is cut}
DANGERESQUE: Is that it? Did I save the day?
{The bomb explodes violently, obliterating the car and knocking Dangereseque out of the scene. Game over.}

{If the right wire is cut}
DANGERESQUE: Now to short circuit the bomb stuff!
{If the bomb is not short circuited in time, the bomb explodes violently, obliterating the car and knocking Dangereseque out of the scene. Game over.}

[edit] Red Wire

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: The mouseover text said it best: Red Wire.

[edit] Get/Use

{Before reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I shouldn't mess with these wires until I have that Bomb Defuser's Quickstart Guide.

{After reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I should just do what the Quickstart Guide told me.

[edit] Anything → Red Wire

DANGERESQUE: That's prolly just gonna get me blowed up.

{After reading the guide}
DANGERESQUE: I really just need to find something to cut these wires.

[edit] Wire Cutters → Red Wire

{If the right wire is cut, Dangeresque won't say anything}

{If the wrong wire is cut}
DANGERESQUE: Did I do it? I think I did it!
{The car blows up. Game over.}

[edit] Inside Dangercaresque

[edit] A/C Control

[edit] Look

RENALDO: That's the control for the air slash conditioner. Say, why DO they put that slash in the middle there?

[edit] Get/Use

{Before adding colognac}
{Renaldo turns the A/C on. Air begins to blow through it. Then, he turns it off.}
RENALDO: I'ma shut it orf. It craps out on ya's if you run it for too long.

{After adding colognac}
{Renaldo turns the A/C on. Green air blows through it. Renaldo switches it off.}
RENALDO: Whoof! That colognac ain't foolin around! I'ma smell like a dank dungeon in no time! A big step up from my usual dank shower aroma.

{When the colognac is in and the air freshener is placed}
RENALDO: Hey! Thy Dungeonmusk re-scented that old air fraershenaer! Good timing too cause it sounds like the A/C just gave out.

[edit] Air Freshener → A/C

RENALDO: Normally ya hang these things from the rearview.

[edit] Colognac → A/C

RENALDO: If I wanna add some stank to the A/C, I don't think that's the way to doot. Maybe under the hood? Next to the cramifold gaersket?

[edit] Ashtray

[edit] Look

RENALDO: It's the aershtray.

{When open, and empty}
RENALDO: Just an empty aershtray.

[edit] Get/Use

{Renaldo opens the ashtray. There is a bent paperclip inside.}

{Renaldo closes it without saying anything.}

[edit] Anything → Ashtray

RENALDO: I don't need to use that with the aershtray.

[edit] Button

[edit] Look

RENALDO: A prime specimen push button. The envy of all its unpushed friends. Just beggin to get pushed, that button.

[edit] Get/Use

RENALDO: I don't remember what this does but I'ma push it!
{Renaldo pushes the button}
RENALDO: Well, somethin' th'dunked. Not sure what.
{Outside, the trunk is now open.}

{After being pushed}
RENALDO: It's already pushed.

[edit] Anything → Button

RENALDO: I don't need to use anything with that.

[edit] Finest Colongac

[edit] Look

RENALDO: A bottle of Thy Dungeonmusk. The colognac for shirtless viking types.

[edit] Get/Use

RENALDO: "Thy Dungeonmusk! Obvious smells are: Seventies, Men's Room, and DENNIS."
{Renaldo takes the bottle.}

[edit] Air Freshener → Colognac

RENALDO: If I wanna stank up this air fraeshener, that is NAT the way to doot.

[edit] Anything → Colognac

RENALDO: I don't need to use anything with that.

[edit] Glovebox Knob

[edit] Look

RENALDO: I think that opens up the glorve bax.

[edit] Get/Use

RENALDO: Okay, I'll open orp the glorve bax! {he fails} It's laerked!

[edit] Anything → Glove Box

RENALDO: That won't unlock the glorve bax for me.

[edit] Paperclip → Glove Box

RENALDO: Maybe I can jimmypick the laerk with this paperclorp!
{The glove box opens.}
RENALDO: I got it orpen!

[edit] Ol' Fast Food

[edit] Look

RENALDO: It's a greasy bagga Blubb-O's. Dangeresque likes to let it ripen down on the floor mat.

[edit] Get/Use

RENALDO: I'll grab it up. Maybe somebaddy's hungry.
{Renaldo takes the bag.}

[edit] Anything → Ol' Fast Food

RENALDO: I don't need to use anything with that.

[edit] Paperclip

[edit] Look

RENALDO: Looks like a paperclorp in the aershtray.

[edit] Get/Use

{Renaldo takes the paperclip without saying anything.}

[edit] Radio

[edit] Look

RENALDO: IT's a Totaltronics Symptom-7 No-Fi radio with a cassette player and a built-in sound-have. A real sludgefeast for the ears!

[edit] Get/Use

RENALDO: Yeah, let's change the myorsic.
{A different song plays.}

{Renaldo changes the song without saying anything. Several songs are available.}

[edit] Anything → Radio

RENALDO: I am NOT puttin that in the tape player.

[edit] Antenna → Radio

RENALDO: That antenna's too hi-fi for this no-fi radio.

[edit] Rock Spotty Party Mix → Radio

RENALDO: Ohh, a Rock Spotty party mix?! {singing} Rock Spotty, came to rock the party. Guaranteed to rock, rock ya body.
{He puts the tape inside}
{If Renaldo has played all the available music tracks in the game}
RENALDO: I listened to all the available number 1 jams! I'm a myorsical cornnoisuaer!

[edit] Rearview

[edit] Look

{Before the trunk has been opened}
RENALDO: Hey look! It's me. Renaldo! The sidekick!
{After the trunk has been opened}
RENALDO: Now the trunk's orpen. THAT musta been the th'dunk I heard. A trunk th'dunk!

[edit] Get/Use

RENALDO: I don't wanna adjust it. D-Money has it set just right for dropping smoke bombs and oil slicks.

[edit] Air Freshener → Rearview

{Renaldo puts the air freshener on the mirror without saying anything.}

[edit] Anything → Rearview

RENALDO: I don't wanna hang that from the rearview.

[edit] Smelltree

[edit] Look

{Before scenting}
RENALDO: It's a li'l smelltree. The kind your chain-smokin' aunt would hang up and pretend it made the car NOT smell like the fingerholes of a bowling ball.

{After scenting}
RENALDO: It's been freshly scented with Dungeonmusk!

[edit] Get/Use

{Renaldo picks it up without saying anything}

[edit] Anything → Smelltree

RENALDO: I don't need to bother the smelltree with that.

[edit] Colognac → Smelltree

RENALDO: That might add a little too much stank. If I wanna bring this thing back from the dead I oughta just spritz it somehow.

[edit] Using two inventory items together

{Fast food and air freshener}
RENALDO: This ain't the type-a game where you mash stuff together like that. You're thinkin of Dangeresque: Survivo Craftmasta!

[edit] In the Sewer

[edit] Chunk Rock

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's a chunk rock! I used to love chunkin those things at stuff when I was but a wee crooked cop.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Whattaya say, wanna be partners? We can pull the ol' Good Cop/Chunk Rock routine on all the perps!

[edit] Get/Use

{Dangeresque puts the rock in his inventory}
DANGERESQUE: I love a good chunk rock! You can chunk these things at all kindsa stuff!

[edit] Crack in the Wall

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's a little crack in the brick work.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: It's cracks in the wall like you who think they can slip through the cracks in the system!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: A loose chunk o' wall jiggled a little bit. But it's lodged in there pretty good.

[edit] Anything → Crack in the Wall

DANGERESQUE: I don't want to shove that in this crack.

[edit] Tire Iron → Crack in the Wall

{Dangeresque swings the tire iron.}
DANGERESQUE: I dislodged a whole chunk rock!

[edit] Electrician

[edit] Look

{Before talking to him}
DANGERESQUE: Looks like a Union of Dumpy Electrical Workers member.
ELECTRICIAN: Local 458 represent!

{After talking to him}
DANGERESQUE: It's the gray lump of dump that's standing between me and my Quickstart Guide.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: One side, electroman! I need to get my Bomb Defuser's Quickstart Guide outta the grodywater!!
ELECTRICIAN: No way. I'm not movin til I finish this job. And I can't replace this fuse because the building upstairs is pullin too much power. Until they shut all the power off, I ain't budgin.
DANGERESQUE: Can't you just go ask them to shut the power off?
ELECTRICIAN: Ha! I'd need both a Ladder Permit AND a Walk Twenty Steps Permit for that. You're talking two to three weeks just to get those approved!

DANGERESQUE: C'mon, can't you just grab the guide yourself? Or move back a few feet so I can?
ELECTRICIAN: Nope, sorry. Still too much power on in that building upstairs.

{When all the power is off}
DANGERESQUE: Hey, I think all the power's off in that building now. You should be good to change that fuse and get out m'way!
ELECTRICIAN: Hmm, lemme check. {pushes fusebox} Well, whattaya know. It IS off. Why don't you head back topside and come back in a little bit when I'm done.
DANGERESQUE: Why can't you just do it right freakin now so I can get my guide?
ELECTRICIAN: Cause then we'd need an Unruly Observer Permit and a Watch Me Leave the Screen Permit. You don't wanna know the red tape required to pull those.
DANGERESQUE: UGH! Fine. I'll leave and come back.
{If the player has heard about all the permits}
DANGERESQUE: I think I've heard enough about your superfluous permits. Supermitfluous!
ELECTRICIAN: Portmanteau permit DENIED!

DANGERESQUE: But what if I wanna watch you leave the screen?
ELECTRICIAN: Sorry, this is the most you're getting outta me.
{The electrician ducks quickly}
DANGERESQUE: Duckins!!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I'm just gonna shove you aside so I can get my Quickstart Guide.
ELECTRICIAN: Oh yeah? You see those cones?
DANGERESQUE: A coupla safety cones never stopped {starts singing} Dangeresque from parking in the Faculty Lot so it's a shorter walk to the wings place on campus.
{A sharp barrier deploys from the orange cones.}
DANGERESQUE: Uh, never mind. I'll just let you get back to it.

[edit] Anything → Electrician

{Before talking to him}
ELECTRICIAN: Sorry, can't accept it. I'm on the clock.

{After talking to him}
ELECTRICIAN: Bribery won't get you anywhere. I need that power turned off.
DANGERESQUE: So bribery won't work but doing your job for you will?
ELECTRICIAN: Hey, I don't make the rules. I just talk about them ad nauseum.

[edit] Chunk Rock → Electrician

DANGERESQUE: C'mon chunk rock! Let's give that annoying electrician a little chin music!
ELECTRICIAN: I wouldn't throw that thing at me.
DANGERESQUE: Oh yeah? Why not?!
{A barrier springs up from the orange cones.}
DANGERESQUE: Ah yes, I see. Mommy will find something else to chunk you at, chunk rock.

[edit] Tire Iron → Electrician

{First time only}
DANGERESQUE: C'mon, Tire Iron! Let's put that hard hat to the test!
{Dangeresque waves the tire iron. The electrician ducks.}
ELECTRICIAN: Not so fast! Did you submit a Blunt Force Trauma Variance with an Automotive Accessory Extension?!
DANGERESQUE: UGH! You make everything so boring I don't even wanna crack your stupid skull open no more.

DANGERESQUE: I'm not tryin that again. Ain't freakin worth it.

[edit] Guide

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: There's my Quickstart Guide! I hope its laminated edges hold out against this grodywater.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Do your float honey. Remember, arms and legs out, chin up. Just like Miss Chlorino taught you in the pool.

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I can't reach of it!

[edit] Anything → Guide

DANGERESQUE: That won't help me quickstart get the quickstart guide!

[edit] Antenna → Guide

{Before the electrician leaves}
DANGERESQUE: Good idea. But I gotta get Dumpus Electricus out of the way first.

{After the electrician has left}
DANGERESQUE: THIS is why I got this awesome antenna! Come here, Quickstart Guide!
{Dangeresque rakes the guide toward him with the antenna.}

[edit] Chunk Rock → Guide

DANGERESQUE: I'd just lose the rock and prolly sink the guide.

[edit] Tire Iron → Guide

DANGERESQUE: I don't think that'll reach it.

[edit] Ladder

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's a rusty ladder extending upwards out of the literal underbelly of Brainblow City.
ELECTRICIAN: You coulda just said "it's a ladder".
DANGERESQUE: Shut it!

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Ladder, you help me take a bite out of... CLIMB.
ELECTRICIAN: Groan. Groan I say.

[edit] Get/Use

{Dangeresque climbs the ladder back to the street.}

[edit] Anything → Ladder

DANGERESQUE: The only thing I need to use with this ladder is me!

[edit] Sewer Water

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Brainblow City's water is among the most contaminated in the world. Just looks like log flume water to me.

[edit] Talk To

{Before rescuing the guide}
DANGERESQUE: Hey sewer water current! Send my quickstart guide over here!

{After rescuing the guide}
DANGERESQUE: Who knows how many flushed pet alligators and boa constrictors are slowly mutating within these murky depths.

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I'm not touchin that stuff with my bare gloves.

[edit] Anything → Sewer Water

DANGERESQUE: I really don't wanna put that in the grodywater.

[edit] Colognac → Sewer Water

DANGERESQUE: I don't wanna dilute Thy Dungeonmusk!

[edit] Meltshake → Sewer Water

DANGERESQUE: Sure! I'll scoop up a cup. After all, e-coli is only one letter off from being E-Cola!
{Dangeresque fills the cup with sewer water}
DANGERESQUE: The cup's fulla holes so it's draining out.
{A cup meter appears in the corner. It slowly empties.}

{If there is water in the cup}
DANGERESQUE: I've already got some.

{After the water drains}
DANGERESQUE: The water all ran outta my meltshake cup.

[edit] Toolbox

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: That electrician left his toolbox! He was finally good for something!

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: The hood of my car, the glovebox, the trunk, the sewer cap. This toolbox is like the end boss of stuff that opens.

[edit] Get/Use

{The toolbox has three tumblers that need to be aligned to unlock it.}

[edit] Anything → Toolbox

DANGERESQUE: That's not gonna help me get that thing open. This is a TULBAUX toolbox. They're indestructible! The only way I'm gettin in there is the right combination.

[edit] Gunk Smudge

[edit] Look

{Before gunk is cleared}
DANGERESQUE: Some kinda gunk buildup from over the years of being slummed.

{After gunk is cleared}
DANGERESQUE: Now why would that guy scratch "brixx" onto his toolbox?

[edit] Get/Use

{Before cleaning}
DANGERESQUE: It won't come off by glove. Maybe it needs some help.

{After cleaning}
DANGERESQUE: The only thing left to GET here is a clue.

[edit] Anything → Gunk Smudge

DANGERESQUE: That's not gonna get that gunk offa there.

[edit] Meltshake → Gunk Smudge

{When empty}
DANGERESQUE: An empty meltshake cup ain't gonna debunk this gunk.

{With sewer water}
{The water causes the gunk to sizzle away. The word "brixx" is revealed.}
DANGERESQUE: The grody sewer water cleaned that gunk right off! Hmm. "Brixx". I thought that guy was an electrician.

DANGERESQUE: I already cleaned it off.

[edit] Wire Cutters

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: Sweet tooltypes! A pair of wire cutters!

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: Where Dangeresque is involved, it always comes down to the wire... cutters.

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: C'mere cutters. You've got a hot date with some primary colored wires!
{He takes the wire cutters into his inventory}

[edit] Bricks

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's just a groupa bricks.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: I've got you up against the wall, bricks!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to be messin with these bricks.

[edit] Anything → Bricks

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to use anything with these bricks.

[edit] More Bricks

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's just a groupa bricks.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: I've got you up against the wall, bricks!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to be messin with these bricks.

[edit] Anything → More Bricks

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to use anything with these bricks.

[edit] Even More Bricks

[edit] Look

DANGERESQUE: It's just a groupa bricks.

[edit] Talk To

DANGERESQUE: I've got you up against the wall, bricks!

[edit] Get/Use

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to be messin with these bricks.

[edit] Anything → Even More Bricks

DANGERESQUE: I don't need to use anything with these bricks.

[edit] If Dangeresque has spoken with all inanimate objects

DANGERESQUE: I talked to all my inanimate informants!

[edit] Game Over

{If Dangeresque gets run over}
{Dangeresque's stunt double is standing in the road. The green car drives past and knocks him in the air.}

{If Dangeresque jostles the bomb}
{The car explodes. Cut to the street. Renaldo's fez and Dangeresque's glasses are lying in the street.}

{If Dangeresque is in the sewer while the bomb explodes}
{The car explodes. The explosion causes the roof of the sewer to cave in, causing Dangeresque to get blown over}
DANGERESQUE: {In compressed audio} Or did I?
{These are following phrases that will appear in the following order, changing every time you lose.}
But for real...

Do over...

Okay, trying harder this time...

Undo dog! Undo dog!

Fine, here's your bonus point.

{After cycling through the Game Over screens a second time}
No second helpings of bonus points!

{The game then cuts back to the moment before you committed the action that led to the Game Over.}

[edit] Ending

{Dangeresque and Rendaldo are running away from the Gremlin with both the hood and trunk popped. They jump and scream as the car explodes behind them.}
ANNOUNCER: Roomisode complete!
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