From Homestar Runner Wiki

Revision as of 08:32, 21 November 2004 by (Talk)
Jump to: navigation, search
Strong Bad Tanning?



Strong Bad Email #77

Strong Bad discovers the awesomeness of black marker on stomach. Who needs pecs when you've got abs?

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The King of Town, Marzipan, The Announcer, Strong Sad, Homsar (easter egg)


STRONG BAD: {singing} I met her in the summertime. Her name was... {high pitch singing} e-mail!


Hey Strong Bad,

I thought you looked cute as a
Japanese cartoon with the blue hair
and everything. ^_~ I was thinking
you might look even better if you got
out in the sun and got a nice tan. I've
heard that a nice tan really
helps your muscles stand out.


{Strong Bad says "EEEO HE! I think that's how you say that..." for "^_~"}

STRONG BAD: {typing} That's a good point, KS. With the summer months all up on us, I'll probably be going shirtless more often than usual. I know one thing the ladies love more than a regular Strong Bad is a lightly toasted Strong Bad. {clears screen} And I guess it'll help to accentuate my abdominal muscles and my abs, and my cloits. They're already bulging all over the place as it is, but I guess a little more definition wouldn't kill me.

{Cut to Strong Bad lying on a towel, sunbathing in the field. Next to him are buckets labeled 'Animal Phat - "it's lard, yo!"' and 'cocoa butter'}

STRONG BAD: Alright c'mon sun, show me what you got. Don't pull no punches neither. I want the real radioactive stuff.

{enter stage right, The King of Town, wearing round sunglasses}

THE KING OF TOWN: {Sniffs} Oh there it is!

STRONG BAD: {rising from his towel} There what is?

THE KING OF TOWN: Ooh nothing. Hi Strong Bad. How are you this day?

STRONG BAD: Well, I was certainly better before you showed up. I'm still doing pretty good.

THE KING OF TOWN: {sneakly stealing the cocoa butter while Strong Bad isn't looking} Oh good, Oh, well that's all I wanted to know. I guess I'll be moving to a different smell-- place. {shoots off stage right taking the cocoa butter}

STRONG BAD: What the-? Hey! He took my cocoa butter!

{The King of Town peeks back in and grabs the Animal Phat with his invisible hands}


{The words 6-8 hours later in the Compy 386 font appear on screen. Cut to Strong Bad sunbathing again. His chest is now extremely pink. Marzipan enters with a large green oriental style umbrella}

MARZIPAN: Strong Bad, how long have you been laying here?

STRONG BAD: I dunno, six, maybe eight hours.

MARZIPAN: You know, you're supposed to flip over every 15 minutes or so...

STRONG BAD: What? Who wants a tan on their back? There's no abs to accentuate. Not like up here. {stands, admiring his non-existant abs} Ooh, check it out, Ab City, USA, {Shaking hips. We can see that Strong Bad's back is lily-white.} do do do.

MARZIPAN: Strong Bad, I don't see a single ab.

STRONG BAD: What are you talking about, it's like a cold one brewery over here, there's so many six-packs. {producing a sharpie marker} check it out, {drawing abs onto his chest} one, two, threefourfivesix. Oops, forgot the hatching. {adds shading}

MARZIPAN: Aren't you supposed to have pecs?

STRONG BAD: Don't need em! That's why they call me Double A. All Abs.

MARZIPAN: That's weird.

{Marzipan exits stage right}

STRONG BAD: Whoa, I bet I could make some serious dough off this idea. I could be like, a thousandaire, or at least a hundredaire.

{cut to fake ad, with Strong Bad's Ab-Abber 2000 zooming in slowly}

ANNOUNCER: Introducing the all new Strong Bad Ab-Abber 2000! Get results like the the professionals in {words appear on screen} Minutes! Nay! Seconds! Just listen to this guy over here!

{cut to Strong Sad holding the Ab-Abber 2000}

STRONG SAD: {sounding like he is reading off of a tele-prompter} Since using Strong Bad's Ab-Abber Two Thousand {pronounces thousand as Thous And} the ladies have been all up ons. {talking to someone off camera} All up ons? I don't even know what that means?

STRONG BAD: {off camera} Well, Strong Sad, it means they really like you.

STRONG SAD: But they don't! Especially now with all this sharpie on my stomach.

STRONG BAD: Just read the lines man.

{Strong Bad's hand appears on camera holding what appears to be a plush lobster}

STRONG BAD: Do you want to see Goobliss again or what?

STRONG SAD: You leave Gooby out of this!

{Cut to: Close up of the Ab-Abber 2000 box with words 'Act Now!' flashing at the top of the screen}

ANNOUNCER: Act now and recieve the Cloitserizer {words appear at bottom of screen} Abs-solutely free! {words disappear} Max out your {words appear flashing in center screen} Cloits and Dloits!!?! with the ease of a thousandaire. Strong Bad's Ab-Abber 2000. {words appear} "They'll be all up ons!"

{The Paper appears}

Easter eggs

  • Click on the little "G" tag (right side, up near Strong Bad's hand) on Strong Sad's lobster Gooblies to see a Homsar Celebrity testimonial.
  • Click on the marker at the end of the email to see the instructions for Strong Bad's Ab-Abber.

Fun Facts

  • The first bucket says "Animal Phat". Phat is a slang word meaning cool, although it's intended to mean actual fat in this case. This ties in with the second phrase on the bucket: "It's lard, yo!", both a reference to the fact of the bucket's contents and the whole ridiculous slang/rap thing.
  • The facial hair on the man in the instructions is very similar to the style usually adopted by Frank Zappa.
  • Marzipan is carrying one of those toothpick umbrella things you get with tropical drinks.
  • Strong Sad's pet lobster is red, which is the color of a cooked lobster. Live lobsters are brown.

DVD Version

  • The Homsar celebrity testimonial is automatically enabled, so no clicking is required.
  • The DVD version features hidden commentary by Mike, Matt, and Marzipan. To acccess it, switch your DVD player's audio language selection while watching.

External Links

Personal tools