robots
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Strong Bad Email #210 |
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- This article is about the Strong Bad Email. To view other instances of robots, see robots (disambiguation)
The Cheat goes undercover to infiltrate the robot characters that hardly ever show up.
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The Cheat
Places (in order of appearance): Computer Room
Computer: Lappier
Date: Monday, November 24, 2025
Running Time: 6:05 (Flash), 6:54 (YouTube)
Page Title: Lappier Than Thou
Contents |
Transcript
{Strong Bad is checking his email.}
STRONG BAD: {singing} I'm making this email up! Cause I hate everybody! Hate everybody-body! On the Internet! On the Internet!
{blockquote}
<dir> DearSB, You got all these robots round your town, but you never DO anything with them. What giveth?
Carrie Larry, IA <dir>
{Strong Bad pronounces SB as "sbu" and "IA" as "Internet asker"}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Hmmm. Good point, Care-lare, good point. It does seem like a bit of an oversight. {stops typing} Say, The Cheat!
{The Cheat rushes in from the left. Strong Bad turns to greet him.}
THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: Bring up our files on thems of the robotic persuasion.
{The Cheat produces a file folder.}
THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}
{Cut to the folder. The first page displays a dossier for The Robot from the Original Book.}
STRONG BAD: First up, we've got the walking metal robot—
{Cut to The Robot standing in the field, plugged into a detached wall outlet.}
STRONG BAD: The Robot!
{The Robot raises its arm.}
STRONG BAD: One very specific size of nut—
{Zoom in. A dotted line shows where a nut would fit inside The Robot's wrench hand.}
STRONG BAD: —doesn't stand a chance against this guy!
{Cut back to the folder. A page featuring the dossier for the Visor Robot appears.}
STRONG BAD: And this guy was last seen doing a brief stint as one o' them personal assisstants.
{Cut to Homestar Runner in the kitchen. A Visor Robot-shaped AI assistant sits on the table.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Say, fhqwh-bot, add "amazing thing" to my shopping list.
VISOR ROBOT: {visor flashes: subtitled} Okay. I added a lazy bean to your shopping list Homestar.
'HOMESTAR RUNNER: {frustrated} That is not what I asked for. {pulls up a bundle of bean-headed plushes} And I already own all the lazy beans!
VISOR ROBOT: {visor flashes: subtitled} Now playing "Hazy Jeans" from Larry Palaroncini's solo album.
{Song begins to play}
LARRY PALARONCINI: {singing} Well, I can't see a thing in these hazy jeans...
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {frustrated groaning} Fhqwh-bot set a time before a thousand million years!
{Homestar walks out.}
VISOR ROBOT: {visor flashes: subtitled} Okay. Setting a timer for aAAraRrrRRaarRaA—
{The Visor Robot malfunctions and explodes, knocking all the lazy beans off the table and exposing its lightbulb.}
{Cut back to the file.}
STRONG BAD: And we can't forget my robotic— {a dossier for the Grape Nuts Robot appears} doppelgänger! Who, in an unexpected twist, became the spokesperson for competing cereal companies.
{Cut to the kitchen. The Grape Nuts Robot is standing next to a box of Cheat Commandos...O's. The Cheat Commandos music plays.}
GRAPE NUTS ROBOT: {subtitled} Now spell. Come back, Flavor. Come back, Nutrition.
{Cut back to the computer.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} And finally, the leader of them all... that technological terror... the pinnacle of mechanical panic!
{Cut to the file showing a dossier for humidibot. The picture shows an imposing silhouette with a "?" sign on it. The name is unknown.}
STRONG BAD: You know him. You fear him.
{Cut to the field. Humidibot rolls up.}
HUMIDIBOT: {spitting water} It's a great day for Humidibot! This is not my theme song!
{Humidibot rolls off.}
{Strong Bad and The Cheat peek from behind the buses as Humidibot rolls past.}
STRONG BAD: There he goes, The Cheat. On his way to a secret robot council meeting! Time for you to go...
{Behind the bushes, Strong Bad and The Cheat have an empty The Cheatbot shell.}
STRONG BAD: DEEP UNDERCOVER!
{Strong Bad shoves the The Cheatbot shell on The Cheat.}
THE CHEAT: {scuttling around} {beeping The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: Poifect! Now follow him and learn what their world domination plans are so we can copy 'em!
THE CHEAT: {doubtful The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: Of course they want to take over the world! Why else would robots be having a secret council meeting?
THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: {stroking his chin} Oh. I suppose a firmware upgrade is a possibility. If it is, {takes out a 5 floppy disk} then take this floppy and download it.
{Strong Bad shoves the floppy into The Cheatbot's eyehole.}
THE CHEAT: {painful The Cheat noises} {blood drips}
STRONG BAD: Oops. Sorry. The higher the tech, the sharper the corners. That's what Compy Corp. says, anyways.
{Cut to a commerical for a very pointy computer monitor called the Slicey 86, paired with a keyboard with very spiky keys.}
STRONG BAD: {narrating} Yes, the Compy Slicey 86. {schwing noise} Our sharpest PC yet!
{A suture kit appears}
STRONG BAD: {narrating} Suture kit included!
{Cut back to the field.}
STRONG BAD: Now get moving, The Cheatbot!
THE CHEATBOT: {scuttles away} {beeping The Cheat noises}
{A group of robots is assembled in the Field behind a sign reading Council of Grayish ROBOTS. Present are an ATM machine, Humidibot, The Robot, the Grape-Nuts Robot, and the full-sized Visor Robot.}
VISOR ROBOT: {subtitled} I think spicy chili crisp is too played out.
{The Cheatbot joins the group.}
VISOR ROBOT: {subtitled} I'm switching back to sriracha.
GRAPE NUTS ROBOT: {subtitled} I mixed up marsala and masala at my in-laws' house. Soooo embarassing.
HUMIDIBOT: {spitting water} On that note, should we start back up our Besemelle versus Hollandaise debate? Cause I'm Humidibot?
{Cut back to Strong Bad and The Cheat, without The Cheatbot shell.}
STRONG BAD: {frustrated} They were just talking about friggin' sauce?
THE CHEAT: {shrugging} {The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: You sure it wasn't like... mind control sauce? Or melt the human stomach so we can take over the world sauce!
THE CHEAT: {shakes head} {The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: I refuse to accept that! There's just no way robots would secretly congregate only to discuss various types of sauce! {hovering in mid-air} You must have missed something. {lands on the ground} You gotta go back.
THE CHEAT: {shrugging} {The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: What do you mean you don't know any sauces? Just make something up! Find out how sauce equals world domination. Solve for sauce.
THE CHEAT: {frustrated The Cheat noises}
STRONG BAD: Back in the bucket!
{Strong Bad shoves the bucket shell back on The Cheat.}
Cut to Humidibot discussing sauces.}
HUMIDIBOT: {spitting water, singing} Coodeman's Burrelli sauce.
{The Cheatbot joins the group.}
{Cut to an ad for sauce.}
HUMIDIBOT: {singing} "It's gonna fill up your belly, hoss!"
{The belly on the chef guy on the add inflates. A button pops off.}
Cut back to the robot assembly.}
HUMIDIBOT: {spitting water} Remember that?
VISOR ROBOT: {subtitled} Classic. Just classic.
GRAPE NUTS ROBOT: {subtitled} Hahaha Ha ha ha ha.
VISOR ROBOT: {subtitled} Your turn, CashMatic.
The ATM's screen blinks "???" as a tone plays. A thought cloud shows the ATM spitting out dollar bills.}
HUMIDIBOT: {spitting water} Oops, sorry. You lose.
{The Robot gives a floppy switching noise and angrily lifts his wrench arm. He shoves it into the screen of the ATM machine and pulls out a hexagonal nut filled with wires. The ATM machine falls over. The Cheatbot looks terrified.}
THE CHEATBOT: {terrified screaming}
HUMIDIBOT: {spitting water} Oh! Hi, new-timer! We were just playing a round of "Recite your favorite sauce commercial perfectly, or we rip out your insides!" {ominously} And now it's your turn!
{The Cheatbot gulps.}
STRONG BAD: {flashback} Just make something up! Up! Up!
{A second Strong Bad head appears.}
STRONG BAD: {flashback} Solve for sauce! Sauce! Sauce!
{The first Strong Bad head peeks in.}
STRONG BAD: Why do I have a southern accent now? Now? Now? Now?
{The Strong Bad heads leave.}
THE CHEATBOT: {nervous The Cheat noises}
{A thought bubble appears showing Coach Z's hand holding a bun with nothing on it. A cloud of dust appears on top of it.}
COACH Z: {holding two buns in the locker room} Dry bun.
{The doorbell rings.}
COACH Z: Oh! Who's doing that?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Someone's doin' 'at!
{Homestar produces a jar of sauce and pours it onto Coach Z's dry hamburger bun.}
{Cut to the King of Town eating something purple on top of a bowl of Ice Style Cream.}
KING OF TOWN: This sauce-bearing sundae tastes more like a Monday.
{the doorbell rings}
KING OF TOWN: Oh! Who is doing that?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Someone's doin' 'at!
{Homestar produces a jar of sauce and splatters it onto the King of Town's sundae.}
'{Cut to Strong Sad brushing his teeth with No Flav-O toothpaste.}
STRONG SAD: I'm all out of unflavored dentifrice!
{the doorbell rings}
STRONG SAD: Oh! Who keeps doing that?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: It's Sawman's doin' 'at!
{Homestar produces a jar of sauce and splatters it onto Strong Sad's toothbrush.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: The condiment for whatever you're doin'!
{Ad for sauce.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {singing} Who, you ask is doin' 'at? It's Sawman's doin' 'at! Sauce!
{Cut back to a nervous The Cheatbot.}
THE CHEAT BOT: {The Cheat noises}
{Drumroll. The Visor Robot, the Grape Nuts Robot, and The Robot all stare.}
HUMIDIBOT: {spitting water} We love Sawman's Doin' 'at!
THE ROBOT: {subtitled} YAAAAAAAAY!
VISOR ROBOT: {subtitled} Hooray!
HUMIDIBOT: That means you're our new robot council leader!
THE CHEATBOT: {curious The Cheat noises}
{Cut to Strong Bad at his computer, inside a The Cheatbot shell.}
STRONG BAD: {typing, voice echoes} And that Car Lar... car alarm, is how The Cheat became our supreme robotic overlord. {angrily} Thanks for freakin' asking!
{Strong Bad is compressed in a The Cheatbot shell. He jumps off his stool and strains as he shuffles across the floor.}
STRONG BAD: {in pain} Ooh... my neck-breaky... legbendum... spinefold.
{The Cheatbot sits on a throne made from cans of Sawman's Doin' 'At sauce surrounded by the Council of Grayish Robots. Strong Bad shuffles up in his robot shell.}
STRONG BAD: {beeping noises}
{Homestar also shuffles past compressed in a robot shell.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {beeping noises}
{Coach Z is also shuffling around in a robot shell.}
COACH Z: {Coach Z-accented beeping noises}
{Strong Mad jupms in on one foot in a tiny robot shell.}
STRONG MAD: BEEP! BOOP!
{Cut to Humidibot rolling along dramatically. "Humidibot" appears in fancy bloody letters as death metal music plays.}
TARANCHULA: {singing} Dark is the day of Humidibot! This is his actual theme song!
{Humidibot rolls off.}
{Cut to Strong Bad's computer. The CGI paper comes down. It reads >pretend here to email< >>strong bad<<}
STRONG BAD: CG-ow.
{On YouTube a false autoplay images reads "Next Level Chicken in a Pan!! (Wait Until You See the Glass of Milk!)" The image shows chicken in a pan.}
{Cut back to the dossier showing the Visor Robot.}
STRONG BAD: And there was that sad period where he was selling personalized greetings.
{Cut to the Visor Robot, who faces the viewer.}
VISOR ROBOT: {subtitled} Happy 50th Birthday, Joshua. I said Come On FhqwhJosh.
{Everybody to the Limit begins playing.}
VISOR ROBOT: {subtitled: pronounces each i seperately} Si-i-i-i-igh.
{Cut to a Videlectrix game Saucegebra.} A chef holding a pan asks "cups of cream?" SOLVE FOR SAUCE! blinks. A carton of cream flies in. The chef's belly inflates.}
{Cut to an aged Homestar Runer sleeping on his bed under a glass cover. The broken Visor Robot assistant is on his drawer. A wake-up chime plays.}
VISOR ROBOT: Okay. That's your timer for a thousand million years, Homestar.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: It's all right. It's okay. There's something to live for.
{Homestar's room is only a cutout suspended in outer space.}
{Fade out.}
Easter Eggs
YouTube Version
Fun Facts
Trivia
Remarks
Goofs
Fixed Glitches
Inside References
Real-World References
External Links
- watch "robots" as linked from the Toons menu
