retirement B
From Homestar Runner Wiki
| Strong Bad Email #159b |
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Strong Bad continues from retirement A, checking an email on the Compy 386.
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Marzipan, The King of Town, The Cheat, Strong Mad
Places: Computer Room, Carnival Tent, The Field
Computer: Compy 386, Lappy 486
Date: October 3, 2006
Running Time: 2:48
Page Title: Lappy 486
Contents |
Transcript
{Strong Bad is in front of the Compy. Despite the hole, he manages to type "strongbad_email.exe".}
STRONG BAD: {singing} There's a big ol' hole inside my email, makin' it hard to cheeeeck...
{He brings up the email. It is formatted around the hole.}
STRONG BAD: Oooh! Automatic hole formatting! {starts reading}
Dear Strong Bad,
I want to see you perform some amazing
feats of
wonder.
Very ser- iously,
Luke S.
{Strong Bad says "Double Dear Strong Bad" in place of the first line, and after reading "wonder", he comments "You mean, more amazing than checking an email on this computer?!" In place of the name, he says "Luke South".}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Well, I am very serious too. Serious about the most incredible, tantalizing, pants-defying, mind-googling sights in the whole world!! {stops typing} Lalalalalalaaaa!
{Cut back to show the whole computer room.}
STRONG BAD: Ladies and Luke, I give you...
{A boater hat falls on his head and a cane into his hand. The screen pans away to a carnival tent.}
STRONG BAD: {as a sideshow caller} Strong Bad's Amazing Feats of Wonder! Gawk and squawk as I walk and talk like an old-timey sideshow caller, and add "Lalalalalaa" to the end of everything I say lalalalalalaaa!
{Cut to inside the tent.}
STRONG BAD: First, in our gallery of ocular oddities, is a contortionist with a twist!
{He moves away, revealing a curtain painted with "MARZiPAN - SHE-TYPE! KA-RAZY?"}
STRONG BAD: Feast your Dust Bowl-ravaged eyes on Marzipan, the Human Woo-man {rolls the next "R"} Rrrrrotini!
{A logo for "The Human Woo-man Rotini appears, and the curtain lifts, revealing Marzipan with her hair tied up. She curls her neck like a spring. The audience makes amazed sounds.}
STRONG BAD: Behold! An ocean of pesto!
{Green liquid flies in from offscreen and lands on Marzipan.}
MARZIPAN: That's not part of my act!
{Cut to The King of Town, with some of the green liquid dribbling down from his moustache.}
THE KING OF TOWN: I know! It's a part of mine lalalalalalalaaa!
{He sucks in the liquid. Cut back to Strong Bad.}
STRONG BAD: Now, direct your attention to the Pee Wee Stage...
{Again, Strong Bad moves aside. Now the curtain shows "THE CHEAT - AND HOW! PART ANVIL?"}
STRONG BAD: ...where the flea circus has left town, and the inmates are restless!
{The audience ooohs as the curtain is lifted, showing a manacled The Cheat.}
STRONG BAD: Gather strong at The Cheat's Flea Prison Riot!
{As the above words appear, a magnifying glass focuses on The Cheat and zooms in on a tiny prison in his hair, where a number of small black dots are rioting and squabbling. The prison has some flames coming out of the windows, and a siren is heard. Cut back to Strong Bad.}
STRONG BAD: And lastly, so ghastly, the ate-thh wonder of the world!
{He again moves aside. The curtain shows "Strong Mad - ATE THH! NECK?"}
STRONG BAD: House-mouth!!!
{The curtain lifts, showing Strong Mad in a loincloth. A "HOUSE-MOUTH" logo appears. The audience gasps.}
STRONG MAD: DAAAAH!! {Opens his mouth very wide, taking up most of his body and creating the shape of a house.}
STRONG BAD: {popping in from the side of the screen} This land-locked leviathan conveniently subsists only on outdated electronics!
{He ducks away as the Compy is thrown in Strong Mad's mouth. He closes his mouth. A second later, he jumps a bit as a sparking sound is heard. Strong Mad gulps it down.}
STRONG BAD: {popping in again, and throwing his hat and cane} We did it!!! Lalalalalalalaaaa!
{The screen pans back to the computer room. The Lappy is back.}
STRONG BAD: The Lappy! You're back...y! You and I have some unfinished business, little lady!
{Strong Bad sits down. Cut to the Lappy's screen.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} There ya go, Jake-ula. Now all the cliffhangers have been for reallysolved. Okay, Lappy, I hope your battery's charged, {music starts} cuz I'm finally taking you out for those hush-puppies you always wanted!!!
{He picks up the Lappy and walks off. Cut to a silhouette of Strong Bad holding the Lappy and walking across the sunset. Ghostly images of the Tandy and Compy appear over his head. The music suddenly stops with a record scratch.}
FEMALE LAPPY 486: But Strong Bad, I'm hate hushpuppies!
STRONG BAD: Man, I coulda sworn one of you guys liked hushpuppies.
{The Paper comes down, reading "It was me. I like hushpuppies." The music starts again. It eventually stops again with a record scratch.}
FEMALE LAPPY 486: Can we please find my toe?
{Strong Bad stops walking and looks up toward the ghostly images, which speed away.}
Easter Eggs
- When Strong Bad says "Luke South", click on the Compy's exposed gear to see a southward traffic sign.
- At the end, before the old computers fly away, click their contrast knobs for the Bad Graphics Ghost and a dancing skeleton.
Fun Facts
Remarks
- Somehow, the Compy works without the gears or fans moving.
- Strong Bad has no problem typing commas on the Lappy, despite its missing "toe".
- As in retirement A, The Paper doesn't have a link to Strong Bad's email address.
- The contrast dial on the Compy does not work during the intro.
- Structures or people are called the Eighth Wonder of the World in order to liken their perceived greatness to the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World.
- This email uses the Compy's loading screen.
Goofs
- The - in ser-iously is overlapping the hole a little.
Inside References
- This email follows from cliffhangers and retirement A. In fact, Strong Bad's closing remarks are directed toward Jake, who sent cliffhangers.
- Marzipan had short hair because in keep cool part of her hair was burned and turned green by the chemicals in Strong Bad's pool, although her hair is yellow in this e-mail.
- The Cheat was previously compared with an anvil in huttah!
- The skeleton image on the Compy's computer is from Peasant's Quest.
- Marzipan's curtain contains another case of Lowercase i's.
- The ghost image on the Tandy is from the e-mail ghosts
Real World References
- The Dust Bowl was a series of dust storms caused by poor farming techniques that ravaged the midwestern United States from 1934 to 1939. Hundreds of thousands of people were displaced.
External Links
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