Cheat Commandos (toon)

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This article is about the short. For the characters, see Cheat Commandos.
Toon Category: Shorts
watch Mr. Shmallow New Boots
Rock Rock On some more!

A new toy series from Cheap as Free: Cheat Commandos! Rock, rock on!

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Homestar Runner, Coach Z, Silent Rip, Blue Laser Commander, Blue Laser Minion, Gunhaver, Crackotage, Firebert, Ripberger, Fightgar, Flashfight

Places: The Stick, Blue Laser HQ, Various Battlegrounds

Date: Monday, May 10, 2004

Running Time: 1:03 official, 2:02 actual

Page Title: Compy 386!!

DVD: Everything Else, Volume 2


[edit] Transcript

{Strong Bad is holding out a toy helicopter and making "dub dub dub" noises, then pulls out the Firebert Cheat Commando Action Figure. On the bottom of the screen it says "copyright 1986 Cheap As Free Toys"}

STRONG BAD: {as Firebert} Time to para...troop behind enemy lines!

{Strong Bad drops the action figure to the ground, where Homestar Runner has his own Cheat Commando action figure hiding in some tall grass.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {as Silent Rip} Surprise, surprise, Firebert!

STRONG BAD: {as Firebert} Silent Rip! You snuck up on me!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {as Silent Rip} That's what I do best!

STRONG BAD: {as Firebert} Time to take out the enemy radar dish!

{Cut to a bunch of evil The Cheats wearing blue suits and shades (Blue Laser henchmen) in front of The Stick, which has a pie tin on top of it.}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {as Silent Rip} We're outnumbered! We need Reinforcements!

{Cut back to Firebert and Silent Rip in the tall grass. Coach Z arrives with his own Cheat Commando. It wears military fatigues and a Justice Rocket Backpack Rocket Rocket (JRBRR).}

COACH Z: {as Reinforcements} Did somebody say my name?

STRONG BAD and HOMESTAR RUNNER: {as Firebert and Silent Rip} Reinforcements!

COACH Z: {as Reinforcements} Justice Rocket Backpack Rocket Rocket fire!

{Coach Z presses a button on the back of Reinforcements's JRBRR and a plastic rocket flies up and hits the tin, knocking it over and smashing all but one Blue Laser henchman.}

STRONG BAD: {as Firebert} Mission accomplished! Time for some R&R!

{Cut to the three action figures hanging out with a Barbie-like doll and some Xtra Cold Ones.}

STRONG BAD: Cheat Commandos!


{The Cheat Commandos logo comes up}

ANNOUNCER: Cheat Commandos, only from Cheap as Free Toys! Collect them all! {As he lists each character, their toy box shows up on screen} Fightgar! Crackotage! Silent Rip! Firebert! Gunhaver! Flashfight! Ripberger! Foxface! Reinforcements! And Reynold! {cut to a bunch of vehicles and playsets in the yard} And don't forget new Cheat Commandos vehicles and playsets! There's the "Troop Carrier", {cut to Troop Carrier} the "Troop Transport", {cut to Troop Transport} and the "Action Figure Storage Truck"! {cut to Action Figure Storage Truck} Then take the action even further with Reynold's Apartment Extreme Playset!

{Strong Bad brings Reynold out to his playset and plays as him.}

STRONG BAD: Oh, I really need to go grocery shopping. I wish my girlfriend didn't leave me.

{Strong Bad tosses Reynold into the playset.}

ANNOUNCER: All new Cheat Commandos from Cheap as Free Toys! Cheat Commandos, rock, rock on! And now, tune in weekdays, for Cheat Commando Adventures, on the inside of your TV!

{Cut to a cartoon with cheesy animation with all of the Cheat Commandos. A G.I. Joe-like song plays in the background. Silent Rip is on.}

SILENT RIP: Those loonies are gonna blow up the ocean!

{Cut to the Blue Laser headquarters. A computer screen in the background reads "OPERATION OCEAN BLOW" and "T-MINUS: GO!!!"}


SINGERS: Cheat Commandos, maybe fighting for freedom
and each is sold separately.

{Cut to Gunhaver with lasers blasting above his head}

GUNHAVER: Quick, everyone! To the Action Figure Storage Vehicle!

{Cut to a canyon, where a whole mess of trucks and Blue Laser vehicles are firing red and blue lasers, respectively, at each other. Cut to Crackotage, Silent Rip, Firebert, Ripberger, Gunhaver and Fightgar running along and then a shot of Fightgar firing his machine gun in all directions}

SPOKESMAN: Cheat Commandos is an elite fighting force, sworn to protect the world from the evil forces of Blue Laser!

SINGERS: Cheat Commandos, maybe fighting for freedom
and each is sold separately.

{Cut to Blue Laser HQ. Blue Laser is with a Blue Laser commando. The computer screen now reads, "OPERATION DON'T CRUSH OURSELVES" as well as "T-MINUS: TOTAL".}


{Cut to Firebert with a TNT detonator. He pushes down the plunger and we hear a boom. It starts a rockslide which covers two Blue Laser Commandos. Cut to Blue Laser HQ. The computer screen reads "OPERATION DON'T CRUSH OURSELVES" and now "FAILED!!"}


{Cut to Gunhaver.}

GUNHAVER: Cheat Commandos... {zooms out to show him on a pedestal reading, "ROCK, ROCK ON" and some of the commandos surrounding him} rock rock on!

{The theme music becomes more audible.}

SINGERS: Cheat Commandos, they're probably battling evil
Buy all our playsets and toys!

SPOKESMAN: {in a nasal voice} Weekdays at 4:30.

[edit] Easter Eggs

  • Click on "Rock, Rock On" on the final screen to see all the toys again. Click on each toy to see it alone.

[edit] Fun Facts

[edit] Trivia

  • This commercial serves to introduce all of the Cheat Commandos with the exception of Firebert. He was previously introduced in the Strong Bad email army.
  • All of the Cheat Commandos action figures are designed for "Ages 3–5" and cost $11.01.
  • Four quotes from the toon have been used as a Quote of the Week at some point, more than any other toon to date.
  • The YouTube description for this toon is "Original commercial for the Cheat Commandos line of action figures. Buy all our playsets and toys, indeed!"

[edit] Remarks

  • This cartoon is loaded with exceptions to the once-solid rule of only mentioning "Cheat" with "The" in front of it. The fact that all the Cheat Commando characters except Firebert can speak normally implies that the writers paid no regard to the source material, as is the case with many cartoons based on toys, comics or video games.
  • All figurines, with the exception of Firebert and Ripberger, are "painted" with the same spot design.
  • The Blue Laser Minion has angry eyes underneath his visor.
  • Gunhaver calls the "Action Figure Storage Truck" by the wrong name. He says "vehicle" instead of "truck".
  • When the Cheat Commandos are marching in the TV show, each of them walk by twice. This is most likely parodying cartoons from the 1980s with low budgets and animation goofs.
  • When Fightgar is firing his laser gun, he appears to change hands as he turns from side to side, firing right-handed, then left-handed, then right again. It is possible he is ambidextrous.
  • At the end, Flashfight doesn't have his arm lifted in salute, possibly because he is the commander, which is confirmed in Cheat Commandos: Two Part Episode: Part 1.
  • Although Blue Laser action figures appear in this cartoon, they don't appear packaged in the Easter egg at the end.

[edit] Goofs

[edit] Inside References

  • The helicopter sound in the beginning is just like the The Cheat Skycam Traffic helicopter sounds from the Strong Bad Email local news.
  • When the commandos are at "R&R", they are next to "Xtra Cold Ones".
  • The Cheat Commandos action figure packages are the same design as in the emails action figure and army.
  • Ripberger is the name of the magistrate in Thy Dungeonman II.
  • When Blue Laser Commander is ordering his minions to crush the Cheat Commandos, the computer in the background reads "T-MINUS: TOTAL".

[edit] Real-World References

  • Foxface, the only female commando, is modeled after the GI Joe character Scarlett, whose mantra is "I'm not just one of the 'guys', I'm better", according to the GI Joe website. According to Foxface's packaging, she is "Not One of The Guys!!"
  • Blue Laser's plan to blow up the ocean might be a reference to an actual GI Joe episode. The episode "There's No Place Like Springfield" concerned Cobra's attempts to secure a chemical formula which could convert any body of water—even oceans—into a powerful explosive.
  • The fact that the base of all Cheat Commandos are the same (in terms of size, appearance, expression, etc), with only costumes setting them apart, alludes to countless toys in the '80s that were extremely similar to facilitate mass-production.

[edit] Fast Forward

  • In the Strong Bad Email virus, the shot of Fightgar firing his machine gun in all directions is replayed in an Easter egg where the machine gun is replaced with Homestar's leg.
  • On day 12 of the Decemberweenvent Calendar, Blue Laser Commander quotes this toon in a voice imitating Snagglepuss.

[edit] The Cheat Commandos (and their package captions)

  • Gunhaver
    • Stylin' Coat
    • Cool Glasses!
    • Has a Gun!
    • Probably from Texas!
  • Firebert
    • Yellow Dog!!
    • Black Hat!
    • Not A Good Commando Name!!
    • That One Little Guy!!
  • Silent Rip
    • But Deadly!!
    • Two(2) Pockets!
    • Communicates Via That Microphone Attached to His Helmet!
    • Same Size As The Rest!!
  • Crackotage
    • Action!!
    • Museum Quality!
    • Master Locksmith, Perhaps!
    • Listens To Jazz!!
  • Fightgar
    • Not the Most Popular!!
    • Red Cloth!
    • Probably Has A Raspy Voice!!
    • Needs To Shave!!
  • Reynold
    • Civilian Contractor!!
    • Fake Tie!
    • Favorite Drink: Milk!!
    • Not A Blackbelt!!
  • Reinforcements
    • The One That Coach Z Bought!!
    • Sweet Camos!
    • Justice Rocket Backpack!!
    • Hard to See!!
  • Foxface
    • Lady Type!
    • Natural haircolor!
    • Totally Has It Together!
    • Not One of The Guys!!
  • Ripberger
    • Stealthy!!
    • Black "Gloves!"
    • He's Not Wearing Pajamas!
    • This One Wears Red!
  • Flashfight
    • In Charge of Stuff!!
    • Three Medals!
    • Almost Sounds Like "Flashlight"
    • Five Buttons!

[edit] DVD Version

  • The DVD version features creators' commentary. To access it, switch your DVD player's audio language selection while watching.
  • In the Easter egg with all of the Cheat Commandos toys, instead of clicking on them individually, they are all shown automatically, one at a time.

[edit] Commentary Transcript

(Commentary by: Mike Chapman, Homestar Runner)

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I wanna do this commentary with you.

MIKE: Oh, Homestar Runner.


MIKE: Nice to see you.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I'm in this type of a— of a cartoon.

MIKE: There you are right there.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, that's my side part.

MIKE: Your—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: My side part and my knee part.

MIKE: Your side part and your knee part?


MIKE: The side part's connected to the knee part?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: That's exactly how the song goes. I was being Silent Rip. He snuck up—

MIKE: You know what Silent Rip means?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What does? I don't know. It means he rips— he rips through the silence.

MIKE: That's right. How does he do that?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I don't know, with his microphone.

MIKE: Oh, okay. You're— you're probably right.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Who's that Barbie doll? That's a pretty hot Barbie doll.

MIKE: Yeah?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Why don't you tell them the story of all the names, Mike?

MIKE: Well, orginally, they were for the— uh, when Firebert's first appearance in the army email.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Right, The Cheat.

MIKE: The Cheat. Yeah, uh, we had just written down a bunch of commando names. Firebert was the one we, uh, decided on, but we had this list of all these other names: Gunhaver, Silent Rip, Crackotage.


MIKE: And then my friend Matt thought that we should, you know, make a line of these toys using all these different names.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: That's a great idea.

MIKE: Yeah, Matt has a few of 'em. {pause until announcer says "on the inside of your TV"}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: On the inside of your TV, Mike. How do you watch those shows?

MIKE: Have you ever watched anything on the outside of your TV?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, every— uh, I think every show—

MIKE: Oh, okay.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: ends up being on the outside right?

MIKE: You should try the inside.


MIKE: You would fit.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Is it moist in there?

MIKE: {laughs} I hope not.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Tender? The cartoons are more tender.

MIKE: Hey, there's that red ninja that's never been in anything else.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: That's Ripberger.

MIKE: He's Ripberger, yeah.


MIKE: Burger. {laughs} Ripberger.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Ripburger. Burger wheat.

MIKE: The Ripbergers lived behind us in Indiana when we were growing up.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You had some burger wheat for— for lunch today, didn't you?

MIKE: I think that was bulger wheat.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Burger— burger wheat.

MIKE: All right, that's enough about that.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I like this "weekdays" guy. He's like a local guy, not from the real toy company. {Mike laughs} You're fired! {Mike laughs again}

[edit] External Links

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