First Time Here?

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"Oh, I am Homestar, and this is a website!"

The welcome speech for first-time viewers of Directed by Cherry Greg.

Cast (in order of appearance): Homestar Runner, Clapper Loader, Cherry Greg, Strong Bad

Places: The Field

Date: Thursday, March 28, 2002

Running Time: 1:52

Page title: Welcome Speech

DVD: Everything Else, Volume 1


[edit] Transcript

{Homestar Runner stands in a field, with a clapperboard obstructing the view. The screen is overlaid with a video camera frame including a blinking red "Record" light.}

CLAPPER LOADER: Homestarrunner dot com welcome speech, take 1. {snaps clapperboard and moves it away so Homestar becomes visible}


HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, hello! {In bold are the words that appear on the screen as Homestar says them.} Welcome to

CHERRY GREG: It's "dot com".

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, right. Homestarrunner dot net. "It's dot com!"



CLAPPER LOADER: Homestarrunner dot com welcome speech, take 2. {snaps clapperboard and moves it away from Homestar}


HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, hello! I'm Homestar Runner. ... {whispers} Line?

CHERRY GREG: {whispers} Welcome.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Welcome! ... {whispers} Line?

CHERRY GREG: {whispers} To.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: To! ... {whispers} Line?

CHERRY GREG: {whispers} Homestarrunner dot com.


CHERRY GREG: {annoyed} Cut!


CLAPPER LOADER: Take 6. {snaps clapperboard}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Welcome aboard the USS I am your captain, Homestar Runner—



HOMESTAR RUNNER: Bienvenidos a ¿Conoces a Miguel? ¡Sí! Somos buenos amigos—

CHERRY GREG: {annoyed} English!


CLAPPER LOADER: Take 13. {snaps clapperboard}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Okay, this time I'm totally gonna get it. Seriously you guys.

CHERRY GREG: ... Go ahead, we're rolling.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh! I am Homestar, and This is A Website!


CLAPPER LOADER: Take 25. {snaps clapperboard}

{Homestar Runner is revealed wearing one of four ridiculous costumes (see the Fun Facts below).}

CHERRY GREG: Uhhh, no.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {trying to sound innocent} What??


CLAPPER LOADER: Take 126. {snaps clapperboard again}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, hello! I'm Homestar Runner! ... Isn't that great?

STRONG BAD: {shouting from off-camera} Oh, I can't take it anymore!

{Strong Bad runs on camera and shoves Homestar Runner out of the frame.}

STRONG BAD: {mockingly} Hello, and welcome to I'm a Big Moron Who Can't Remember His Lines Dot Com! {normal tone} No, seriously. I'm Strong Bad, and you don't know it yet, but I'm the reason you're here.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {peeking in from off-camera} It's true.

STRONG BAD: {spreads out his arms} Check me out! No, seriously, {spreads his arms again} check me out. Sooooo... Take a look around. I strongly suggest checking out the Strong Bad E-Mails. And this cartoon's not bad. And this game's pretty fun. {quietly} I mean, I played it...

{Links to Strong Bad Email, A Jorb Well Done, and the Homestar Talker appear as Strong Bad says each of them.}

[edit] Fun Facts

[edit] Trivia

[edit] Remarks

  • The Clapper Loader may lack visible arms because the clapperboard appears to operate without anyone holding it.
  • When Homestar talks in Spanish, his speech impediment is much lighter. For example, when he says, "", he does so without a problem.
  • In the same take, "Miguel" may be referencing Mike Chapman, considering that Miguel is the Spanish equivalent of Michael.
  • By the time they get to take 126, the clapperboard states that they are on roll 11. Assuming that they are filming with standard 1000-ft, 35mm rolls, which average about ten minutes of footage per roll, by this point they would have been trying to film scene one for nearly two hours. This makes sense because it is take 126, and each take would probably be a minute or less.
  • Homestar's shirt contains the earlier design color.
  • At the very end of the toon, there are 21 extra frames that don't do anything.
  • In the Spanish dialogue, Homestar should pronounce the name "Homestar Runner punto com", as "punto" is the Spanish name for the period mark.

[edit] Goofs

  • When "Its dot com" appears on the screen, it contains a punctuation error: It should be "It's dot com" because "It's" is a contraction of "It is".

[edit] Inside References

[edit] Fast Forward

  • A promotional video for the Homestar Puppet Plush features Homestar promoting as ""; after being corrected, he presents the site's name as " 'it's dot com!'"

[edit] DVD Version

  • You can choose which costume Homestar wears in Take 25 by using the angle button:
  1. Clown
  2. Witch
  3. Naked
  4. Sailor

[edit] YouTube Version

  • The video is titled "Welcome Speech".
  • All of Homestar's alternate costumes play in sequence. Take 25 is the clown outfit, followed by the witch (take 29), sailor (take 36), and finally naked Homestar (take 43). Cherry Greg says a variation of "no" each time, and Homestar only replies "What?" after the last one.
  • The A Jorb Well Done and Homestar Talker icons are replaced with Fish Eye Lens and TROGDOR!, respectively.

[edit] External Links

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