replacement
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- | {{sbenav | + | {{sbenav}} |
[[Image:replacement.png|thumb|"Please don't dig up the grave."]] | [[Image:replacement.png|thumb|"Please don't dig up the grave."]] | ||
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'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}}, {{Film|Strong Mad}}, {{Film|Bubs}}, {{Film|Coach Z}}, {{Film|Homestar Runner}}, {{Film|Marzipan}}, {{Film|Homsar}} | '''Cast (in order of appearance):''' {{Film|Strong Bad}}, {{Film|The Cheat}}, {{Film|Strong Sad}}, {{Film|Strong Mad}}, {{Film|Bubs}}, {{Film|Coach Z}}, {{Film|Homestar Runner}}, {{Film|Marzipan}}, {{Film|Homsar}} | ||
- | '''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[The Field]], [[ | + | '''Places:''' [[Computer Room]], [[The Field]], [[Basement of the Brothers Strong]], [[Marzipan's House]], [[Stages|The Stage]] |
{{Comp|Compy 386}} | {{Comp|Compy 386}} | ||
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== Transcript == | == Transcript == | ||
- | '''STRONG BAD:''' Our next show, is a family show. It...is...the email. | + | '''STRONG BAD:''' Our next show, is a family show. It... is... the email. |
''{reading}'' | ''{reading}'' | ||
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''{Strong Bad stops typing, picks up a phone, and talks into it, making a sound like a loudspeaker in a supermarket}'' | ''{Strong Bad stops typing, picks up a phone, and talks into it, making a sound like a loudspeaker in a supermarket}'' | ||
- | '''STRONG BAD:''' Attention The Cheat. Customer needs assistance in | + | '''STRONG BAD:''' Attention The Cheat. Customer needs assistance in email. Customer needs assistance in email. |
''{Strong Bad puts down the phone, which is not attached to anything. The Cheat arrives in a blue employee's vest with his name on it}'' | ''{Strong Bad puts down the phone, which is not attached to anything. The Cheat arrives in a blue employee's vest with his name on it}'' | ||
- | '''STRONG BAD:''' The Cheat, didn't I | + | '''STRONG BAD:''' The Cheat, didn't I used to have a throne of some kind? |
'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{points at the stool and makes The Cheat noises.}'' | '''THE CHEAT:''' ''{points at the stool and makes The Cheat noises.}'' | ||
- | '''STRONG BAD:''' No, no, no, this is my ''stool''. I'm talking about a ''throne''. You know, it had, like...gold nuggets on it, and...a hundred cup holders...some of them velvety cushions...you know, a ''throne''. And I think I had a motorcycle, too. See if you can find those. | + | '''STRONG BAD:''' No, no, no, this is my ''stool''. I'm talking about a ''throne''. You know, it had, like... gold nuggets on it, and... a hundred cup holders... some of them velvety cushions... you know, a ''throne''. And I think I had a motorcycle, too. See if you can find those. |
- | '''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}'' | + | '''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises, leaves}'' |
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' I guess the best way to find a replacement is to subject a bunch of applicants to the same rigorous screening process that I subjected myself to ''{begins to sound unsure of what he is saying}'' when I started checking these emails? | '''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' I guess the best way to find a replacement is to subject a bunch of applicants to the same rigorous screening process that I subjected myself to ''{begins to sound unsure of what he is saying}'' when I started checking these emails? | ||
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'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{changes cue card to "Desterhoft"}'' Desterhoft. | '''STRONG BAD:''' ''{changes cue card to "Desterhoft"}'' Desterhoft. | ||
- | '''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' | + | '''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{without hesitation}'' Let me think about it Crapface. |
'''STRONG BAD:''' Whoa! Perfect score! | '''STRONG BAD:''' Whoa! Perfect score! | ||
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'''COACH Z:''' DELORTED! | '''COACH Z:''' DELORTED! | ||
- | ''{Compy flashes DELORTED on a yellow background and makes a distorted version of the DELETED sound. Strong Bad looks surprised.}'' | + | ''{The Compy flashes DELORTED on a dark yellow-green background and makes a distorted version of the DELETED sound. Strong Bad looks surprised.}'' |
<blockquote class="email" style="background:#8B8B00; text-align:center">DELORTED!</blockquote> | <blockquote class="email" style="background:#8B8B00; text-align:center">DELORTED!</blockquote> | ||
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'''STRONG BAD:''' That's good, that's good, even though he might not have any teeth. What else? | '''STRONG BAD:''' That's good, that's good, even though he might not have any teeth. What else? | ||
- | '''BUBS:''' Kick him in the grill! | + | '''BUBS:''' Kick him in the grill! ''{pumps his elbow}'' |
'''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, yeah! Keep going! | '''STRONG BAD:''' Yeah, yeah! Keep going! | ||
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'''STRONG SAD:''' Uh... Give him a foot massage! | '''STRONG SAD:''' Uh... Give him a foot massage! | ||
- | '''STRONG BAD:''' ''{looks at Strong Sad's [[soolnds]]}'' Those are not feet! | + | '''STRONG BAD:''' ''{looks at Strong Sad's [[soolnds]], mouth agape}'' Those are not feet! |
''{Cut to the field with Homestar, Strong Bad and The Cheat. The Cheat is wearing a cardboard box that has a drawing of himself on it.}'' | ''{Cut to the field with Homestar, Strong Bad and The Cheat. The Cheat is wearing a cardboard box that has a drawing of himself on it.}'' | ||
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'''STRONG BAD:''' Ugh. ''{typing}'' This screening process is neither processing nor screening very well. I suppose I should cut to the chase and haul out the big guns...DANCE CONTEST! | '''STRONG BAD:''' Ugh. ''{typing}'' This screening process is neither processing nor screening very well. I suppose I should cut to the chase and haul out the big guns...DANCE CONTEST! | ||
- | ''{Cut to a stage. Music is playing. We see the top part of Strong Bad's head watching each contestant. | + | ''{Cut to a stage. Music is playing. We see the top part of Strong Bad's head watching each contestant.}'' |
+ | |||
+ | ''{The first contestant is Marzipan, who spins her ponytail around while moving her head left and right.}'' | ||
+ | |||
+ | ''{Cut to Coach Z, who taps his right foot while waving his arms behind his head one after the other.}'' | ||
+ | |||
+ | ''{Cut to Strong Sad, who is simply pointing his fingers.}'' | ||
+ | |||
+ | ''{Cut to Bubs shaking his arms while leaning forward and then jumping up and down.}'' | ||
+ | |||
+ | ''{Cut to Strong Mad, who simply stands in place and yells:}'' | ||
'''STRONG MAD:''' I'M STRONG MAD! I'M STRONG MAD! | '''STRONG MAD:''' I'M STRONG MAD! I'M STRONG MAD! | ||
- | ''{Cut to Homsar, who shuffles his feet all along the stage. | + | ''{Cut to Homsar, who shuffles his feet all along the stage.}'' |
+ | |||
+ | ''{The camera then cuts to and zooms in on Homestar, who is lit by a spotlight. The music changes to the ending of a slow, dramatic song.}'' | ||
'''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{singing}'' And then I put it on my faaaaace... | '''HOMESTAR RUNNER:''' ''{singing}'' And then I put it on my faaaaace... | ||
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''{Cut to Strong Bad at his computer.}'' | ''{Cut to Strong Bad at his computer.}'' | ||
- | '''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Uh, this dance contest is neither contesting nor dancing very well. Looks like I'm gonna be checking e-mails and kicking Cheats 'til the day I die. ''{stops typing}'' Whoa, that'd make an awesome tattoo! Or an even better epitaph! | + | '''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Uh, this dance contest is neither contesting ''{pronounces "contesting" as "CON-test-ing"}'' nor dancing very well. Looks like I'm gonna be checking e-mails and kicking Cheats 'til the day I die. ''{stops typing}'' Whoa, that'd make an awesome tattoo! Or an even better epitaph! |
''{Cut to the field at night. A blank tombstone is on the foreground, and as we hear Strong Bad's voice, his words are carved on the slab.}'' | ''{Cut to the field at night. A blank tombstone is on the foreground, and as we hear Strong Bad's voice, his words are carved on the slab.}'' | ||
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== Easter Eggs == | == Easter Eggs == | ||
- | *At the end, click on the word "Cheats" to see another exchange between Strong Bad and The Cheat | + | *At the end, click on the word "Cheats" to see another exchange between Strong Bad and The Cheat. |
- | + | *:''{Cut to The Cheat near his light switch, still wearing his uniform.}'' | |
- | :''{Cut to The Cheat near his light switch, still wearing his uniform.}'' | + | *:'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{offscreen, into speakerphone}'' A-ttention The Cheat! |
- | + | *:'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}'' | |
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{offscreen, into speakerphone}'' A-ttention The Cheat! | + | *:'''STRONG BAD:''' Have you found that motorcycle yet? ''{slight pause}'' Maybe check in our... stock room. |
- | + | *:'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises, leaves}'' | |
- | :'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}'' | + | *:'''STRONG BAD:''' And Dana needs more quarters on register three. |
- | + | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' Have you found that motorcycle yet? ''{slight pause}'' Maybe check in our...stock room. | + | |
- | + | ||
- | :'''THE CHEAT:''' ''{The Cheat noises}'' | + | |
- | + | ||
- | :'''STRONG BAD:''' And Dana needs more quarters on register three. | + | |
== Fun Facts == | == Fun Facts == | ||
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=== Trivia === | === Trivia === | ||
*The label on the disk in the floppy disk container reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#alone in the dark|alone in the dark]]". | *The label on the disk in the floppy disk container reads "[[Floppy Disk Container#alone in the dark|alone in the dark]]". | ||
+ | *The [[YouTube]] description for this email is "Who will check his emails when Strong Bad retires? Aforementioned Strong Bad tries to find out." | ||
+ | *Since the [[font]] called Engravers MT is used, the first quotation mark on Strong Bad's gravestone is backwards. | ||
===Remarks=== | ===Remarks=== | ||
[[Image:delorted.png|thumb|DELORTED!]] | [[Image:delorted.png|thumb|DELORTED!]] | ||
*Strong Bad uses a [[disconnected telephone]]. | *Strong Bad uses a [[disconnected telephone]]. | ||
- | *Strong Bad's epitaph reads "kicking Cheats in the hereafter", a rare use of The Cheat's name without an [[integral article]]. | + | <!-- *Strong Bad's epitaph reads "kicking Cheats in the hereafter", a rare use of The Cheat's name without an [[integral article]]. // See Talk page --> |
<!-- * Strong Bad misspells ''till'' as '' 'til'', an error that is common even among enthusiasts of the English language. // This is not a misspelling; it's a variant. Ref: http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?book=Dictionary&va='til - dro -- In fact, 'till is incorrect, it should be 'til, till, or until --> | <!-- * Strong Bad misspells ''till'' as '' 'til'', an error that is common even among enthusiasts of the English language. // This is not a misspelling; it's a variant. Ref: http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?book=Dictionary&va='til - dro -- In fact, 'till is incorrect, it should be 'til, till, or until --> | ||
*Strong Bad doesn't interview Strong Mad or Homsar, yet they still take part in the dance contest; he also doesn't interview The Cheat. | *Strong Bad doesn't interview Strong Mad or Homsar, yet they still take part in the dance contest; he also doesn't interview The Cheat. | ||
- | |||
*The visible "DELET" part of the [[DELETED]] text is the same size as the "DELOR" part of Coach Z's "DELORTED". At that size, part of the final D and the exclamation point (which are included in the Flash file) wouldn't fit on the screen. | *The visible "DELET" part of the [[DELETED]] text is the same size as the "DELOR" part of Coach Z's "DELORTED". At that size, part of the final D and the exclamation point (which are included in the Flash file) wouldn't fit on the screen. | ||
+ | *When Strong Bad types "DANCE CONTEST!" the initial D appears unusually close to the final period in the preceding ellipsis, probably as a result of trying to avoid splitting the phrase at a line break. | ||
+ | *Homsar's walking sound is not heard as he walks back and forth. | ||
===Goofs=== | ===Goofs=== | ||
- | *When The Cheat turns to | + | *When The Cheat turns to exit, his nametag [[Flipped Images|switches sides and is reversed]]. |
*The sign above Marzipan normally reads "Thank You". In this email, it appears to be blank due to a positioning error in the Flash file. | *The sign above Marzipan normally reads "Thank You". In this email, it appears to be blank due to a positioning error in the Flash file. | ||
- | |||
*At the end of the email the moon is facing the back of the gravestone, but the shadow is in front of the moon and the other side is bright. | *At the end of the email the moon is facing the back of the gravestone, but the shadow is in front of the moon and the other side is bright. | ||
+ | *Marzipan's hair spins in front of her dress, as if it were going through her neck. | ||
+ | *When Strong Bad asks Coach Z for his best "DELETED!", the computer screen displays the text he typed before asking The Cheat about his throne. | ||
===Inside References=== | ===Inside References=== | ||
- | *Homestar's repeated use of " | + | *Homestar's repeated use of "crap[[Names Ending in -face|face]]" is related to the way he answered his first email in [[50 emails]]. |
*Bubs's moves in the dance contest come from the game [[Dancin' Bubs]]. | *Bubs's moves in the dance contest come from the game [[Dancin' Bubs]]. | ||
*Strong Bad first [[Kicking The Cheat|kicked The Cheat]] in [[little animal]]. | *Strong Bad first [[Kicking The Cheat|kicked The Cheat]] in [[little animal]]. | ||
+ | *Strong Bad previously mentioned gold nuggets in his [[Strong Bad's Character Video|character video]]. | ||
===Real-World References=== | ===Real-World References=== | ||
*The Cheat is wearing a blue uniform, typical of [[Wikipedia:Wal-Mart|Wal-Mart]] employees, but Strong Bad uses a red phone, typical of [[Wikipedia:Target Corporation|Target]] stores. | *The Cheat is wearing a blue uniform, typical of [[Wikipedia:Wal-Mart|Wal-Mart]] employees, but Strong Bad uses a red phone, typical of [[Wikipedia:Target Corporation|Target]] stores. | ||
*The name "Butkus" refers to [[Wikipedia:Chicago Bears|Chicago Bears]] Hall-Of-Fame linebacker [[Wikipedia:Dick Butkus|Dick Butkus]]. | *The name "Butkus" refers to [[Wikipedia:Chicago Bears|Chicago Bears]] Hall-Of-Fame linebacker [[Wikipedia:Dick Butkus|Dick Butkus]]. | ||
- | *A [[wikipedia:Grill (jewelry)| | + | *A [[wikipedia:Grill (jewelry)|grill]] often refers to the dental object people (most prominently rappers) wear on their teeth, but can also mean the mouth/teeth themselves. |
- | *Coach Z's dance is similar to a popular [[Wikipedia: | + | *Coach Z's dance is similar to a popular [[Wikipedia:Hardcore punk|hardcore]] dance referred to as "Shootin' the arrow". |
===Fast Forward=== | ===Fast Forward=== | ||
*Marzipan's first scroll button song was later used on the [[Scroll Button Songs|Strong Bad Email Menu]], despite him saying that it was the worst song he ever heard. | *Marzipan's first scroll button song was later used on the [[Scroll Button Songs|Strong Bad Email Menu]], despite him saying that it was the worst song he ever heard. | ||
*Strong Bad would later decide to not die at all in [[your funeral]]. | *Strong Bad would later decide to not die at all in [[your funeral]]. | ||
+ | *Marzipan's dance moves would be seen again in [[nightlife]]. | ||
+ | *The graves for the eleven former [[King of Town (title)|Kings of Town]] would be shown, in similar style to Strong Bad's grave, in [[original]]. | ||
+ | *Strong Sad was shown to have teeth after all in [[narrator]], where he can be seen brushing them. He does this again in [[concert]]. | ||
==DVD Version== | ==DVD Version== | ||
- | *The DVD version features hidden creator's commentary. To access it, switch | + | *The DVD version features hidden creator's commentary. To access it, switch the DVD player's audio language selection while watching. |
===Commentary Transcript=== | ===Commentary Transcript=== | ||
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''{pause}'' | ''{pause}'' | ||
- | '''MIKE:''' So, what are we | + | '''MIKE:''' So, what are we{{--}} Which one is this? Replacements? |
'''MATT:''' Yeah, he's trying to find an heir to the throne! | '''MATT:''' Yeah, he's trying to find an heir to the throne! | ||
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''{pause until Strong Bad holds up the "Desterhoft" card}'' | ''{pause until Strong Bad holds up the "Desterhoft" card}'' | ||
- | '''MIKE:''' Hey, that's the name of the guy that sent the email! | + | '''MIKE:''' ''{sarcastic "surprised" voice}'' Hey, that's the name of the guy that sent the email! |
- | '''MATT:''' That's a funny name. | + | '''MATT:''' ''{similar voice}'' That's a funny name. |
- | '''MIKE:''' ''{imitates the "Deleted" buzzer, then again as Strong Bad | + | '''MIKE:''' ''{imitates the "Deleted" buzzer, then again as Strong Bad deletes the email}'' |
'''MATT:''' ''{of "DELORTED"}'' Oof. That brown screen is gross. I like it. Now this is our friend [[Craig Zobel]], who... you all know. His favorite thing ever on our website is right here where Bubs attacks Strong Bad. | '''MATT:''' ''{of "DELORTED"}'' Oof. That brown screen is gross. I like it. Now this is our friend [[Craig Zobel]], who... you all know. His favorite thing ever on our website is right here where Bubs attacks Strong Bad. | ||
- | '''MIKE:''' That's just me being ba | + | '''MIKE:''' That's just me being ba{{--}}being a lazy animator. It wasn't supposed to be funny. |
'''MATT:''' ''{partially over the last line}'' No, that was you being a genius. | '''MATT:''' ''{partially over the last line}'' No, that was you being a genius. | ||
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'''MIKE:''' Yeah. | '''MIKE:''' Yeah. | ||
- | '''MATT:''' ''{of the box with Strong Sad's image}'' That Strong Sad drawing is pretty great. The Cheat clearly drew that for him. ''{after Strong Bad's "Those are not feet.}'' What are they called, Mike? | + | '''MATT:''' ''{of the box with Strong Sad's image}'' That Strong Sad drawing is pretty great. The Cheat clearly drew that for him. ''{after Strong Bad's "Those are not feet."}'' What are they called, Mike? |
'''MIKE:''' Soolnds? | '''MIKE:''' Soolnds? | ||
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'''MATT:''' Homestar is singing in a dance contest, Mike. He doesn't, he obviously doesn't know what's going on. | '''MATT:''' Homestar is singing in a dance contest, Mike. He doesn't, he obviously doesn't know what's going on. | ||
- | '''MIKE:''' Even if it was a singing contest, it was a pretty bad song. | + | '''MIKE:''' Even if it was a ''singing'' contest, it was a pretty bad song. |
'''MATT:''' Yeah. | '''MATT:''' Yeah. | ||
Line 321: | Line 335: | ||
''{they laugh}'' | ''{they laugh}'' | ||
- | '''MATT:''' It's a great song, I think. It's very interesting. It makes you wonder. What did | + | '''MATT:''' It's a great song, I think. It's very interesting. It makes you wonder. What did{{--}} and what happened that spawned that? |
'''MIKE:''' I don't wanna know. | '''MIKE:''' I don't wanna know. | ||
Line 327: | Line 341: | ||
''{pause until The Paper}'' | ''{pause until The Paper}'' | ||
- | '''MIKE:''' That's it. | + | '''MIKE:''' ''{sighs}'' That's it. |
- | '''MATT:''' | + | '''MATT:''' [[Preeeow]]. |
===Fun Facts=== | ===Fun Facts=== | ||
- | *[[Wikipedia:Hostess|Hostess]] is a manufacturer of various snack cakes and pastries, most famously the [[Wikipedia:Twinkie|Twinkie]]. | + | *[[Wikipedia:Hostess (brand)|Hostess]] is a manufacturer of various snack cakes and pastries, most famously the [[Wikipedia:Twinkie|Twinkie]]. |
*The critically panned 2005 film ''[[IMDB:tt0369226|Alone in the Dark]]'', a box-office failure, was based on the video game of the same name, which was in the [[Floppy Disk Container]] in this email. | *The critically panned 2005 film ''[[IMDB:tt0369226|Alone in the Dark]]'', a box-office failure, was based on the video game of the same name, which was in the [[Floppy Disk Container]] in this email. | ||
== External Links == | == External Links == | ||
- | {{sbemailextlinks|105|164}} | + | {{sbemailextlinks|105|164|youtube=bjHlT8yyXFs}} |
- | + | ||
{{Strong Bad Email}} | {{Strong Bad Email}} | ||
- | [[Category: Emails With DVD Commentary]][[Category:Podstar Runner]] | + | |
+ | [[Category:Emails With DVD Commentary]][[Category:Podstar Runner]] |
Current revision as of 17:25, 2 July 2023
Strong Bad Email #105 |
|
Strong Bad looks for a replacement for when he retires from answering emails.
Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, The Cheat, Strong Sad, Strong Mad, Bubs, Coach Z, Homestar Runner, Marzipan, Homsar
Places: Computer Room, The Field, Basement of the Brothers Strong, Marzipan's House, The Stage
Computer: Compy 386
Date: Tuesday, June 8, 2004
Running Time: 3:22
Page Title: Compy 386!!
DVD: strongbad_email.exe Disc Four
Contents |
[edit] Transcript
STRONG BAD: Our next show, is a family show. It... is... the email.
{reading}
Dear Strong Bad,
Have you ever thought who will take
your place when you retire?
Your friend,
Jeffrey Desterhoft
STRONG BAD: {typing} You've got a good point there, Jeffy. I suppose I can't keep checking these e-mails forever. I never really thought about finding an heir to my throne before. Come to think of it, what ever happened to my throne?
{Strong Bad stops typing, picks up a phone, and talks into it, making a sound like a loudspeaker in a supermarket}
STRONG BAD: Attention The Cheat. Customer needs assistance in email. Customer needs assistance in email.
{Strong Bad puts down the phone, which is not attached to anything. The Cheat arrives in a blue employee's vest with his name on it}
STRONG BAD: The Cheat, didn't I used to have a throne of some kind?
THE CHEAT: {points at the stool and makes The Cheat noises.}
STRONG BAD: No, no, no, this is my stool. I'm talking about a throne. You know, it had, like... gold nuggets on it, and... a hundred cup holders... some of them velvety cushions... you know, a throne. And I think I had a motorcycle, too. See if you can find those.
THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises, leaves}
STRONG BAD: {typing} I guess the best way to find a replacement is to subject a bunch of applicants to the same rigorous screening process that I subjected myself to {begins to sound unsure of what he is saying} when I started checking these emails?
{Cut to Strong Bad and Homestar standing in the Field.}
STRONG BAD: I'm gonna hold up a last name, and you make fun of it. {holds up a cue card with the word "Gargleman" written on it} Gargleman.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Crapface.
STRONG BAD: {holds up a cue card that reads "Dumweiner"} Dumweiner.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Uhhhh, Crapface.
STRONG BAD: {changes cue card to "Butkus"} Butkus.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Crapface.
STRONG BAD: {changes cue card to "Crambert"} Crambert.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Crapface?
STRONG BAD: {changes cue card to "Desterhoft"} Desterhoft.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {without hesitation} Let me think about it Crapface.
STRONG BAD: Whoa! Perfect score!
{Cut to the computer room with Strong Bad and Coach Z in front of the Compy.}
STRONG BAD: Let's hear your best "deleted."
{He presses a button on the keyboard and the Compy displays DELETED on a blue background, making the standard DELETED sound.}
DELETED!
COACH Z: DELORTED!
{The Compy flashes DELORTED on a dark yellow-green background and makes a distorted version of the DELETED sound. Strong Bad looks surprised.}
DELORTED!
{Cut to the basement with Strong Bad and Bubs and a cardboard box with Strong Sad drawn on it sitting on the couch.}
STRONG BAD: Strong Sad's on the couch, watching TV. What do you do?
BUBS: Kick him in the teeth!
STRONG BAD: That's good, that's good, even though he might not have any teeth. What else?
BUBS: Kick him in the grill! {pumps his elbow}
STRONG BAD: Yeah, yeah! Keep going!
BUBS: {turns to face Strong Bad} Kick you in the grill!
{Bubs starts to approach Strong Bad, waving his arms and yelling menacingly}
STRONG BAD: {nervously} No, no, Bubs, calm down, this is only a drill!
{Cut to Marzipan's house with Strong Bad and Marzipan holding Carol.}
STRONG BAD: Let's hear your best "scroll buttons" song.
MARZIPAN: {singing and playing the guitar} And that's why I like to scroll, with scroll buttons!
STRONG BAD: {sarcastically} Oh, right, right, the worst song I ever heard. Play another one!
MARZIPAN: {singing and playing the guitar} Scroll buttons are good, they move you up and down, they take you to...
{Strong Bad groans. Cut to the basement, with Strong Bad, Strong Sad, and the same cardboard box with Strong Sad on it.}
STRONG BAD: Okay, Strong Sad, Strong Sad's on the couch, watching TV. What do you do?
STRONG SAD: Go make him some hummus!
STRONG BAD: Hummus?! No, try something else.
STRONG SAD: Uh... Give him a foot massage!
STRONG BAD: {looks at Strong Sad's soolnds, mouth agape} Those are not feet!
{Cut to the field with Homestar, Strong Bad and The Cheat. The Cheat is wearing a cardboard box that has a drawing of himself on it.}
STRONG BAD: Now I want you to pretend this is The Cheat, and give him a good, swift, kick in The Cheat!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {bends one of his legs back, then pauses} Umm... {puts his leg back down} Crapface.
{Cut to Strong Bad in front of his computer}
STRONG BAD: Ugh. {typing} This screening process is neither processing nor screening very well. I suppose I should cut to the chase and haul out the big guns...DANCE CONTEST!
{Cut to a stage. Music is playing. We see the top part of Strong Bad's head watching each contestant.}
{The first contestant is Marzipan, who spins her ponytail around while moving her head left and right.}
{Cut to Coach Z, who taps his right foot while waving his arms behind his head one after the other.}
{Cut to Strong Sad, who is simply pointing his fingers.}
{Cut to Bubs shaking his arms while leaning forward and then jumping up and down.}
{Cut to Strong Mad, who simply stands in place and yells:}
STRONG MAD: I'M STRONG MAD! I'M STRONG MAD!
{Cut to Homsar, who shuffles his feet all along the stage.}
{The camera then cuts to and zooms in on Homestar, who is lit by a spotlight. The music changes to the ending of a slow, dramatic song.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {singing} And then I put it on my faaaaace...
{Cut to Strong Bad at his computer.}
STRONG BAD: {typing} Uh, this dance contest is neither contesting {pronounces "contesting" as "CON-test-ing"} nor dancing very well. Looks like I'm gonna be checking e-mails and kicking Cheats 'til the day I die. {stops typing} Whoa, that'd make an awesome tattoo! Or an even better epitaph!
{Cut to the field at night. A blank tombstone is on the foreground, and as we hear Strong Bad's voice, his words are carved on the slab.}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Here lies Strong Bad
{underneath, in slightly smaller letters}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} "Checking e-mails and kicking Cheats in the hereafter"
{underneath}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Buried with his hundred girlfriends
{underneath}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} And like, a jillion dollars
{underneath, in even smaller letters}
STRONG BAD: {voiceover} Please don't dig up the grave.
{The Paper comes down}
[edit] Easter Eggs
- At the end, click on the word "Cheats" to see another exchange between Strong Bad and The Cheat.
- {Cut to The Cheat near his light switch, still wearing his uniform.}
- STRONG BAD: {offscreen, into speakerphone} A-ttention The Cheat!
- THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}
- STRONG BAD: Have you found that motorcycle yet? {slight pause} Maybe check in our... stock room.
- THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises, leaves}
- STRONG BAD: And Dana needs more quarters on register three.
[edit] Fun Facts
[edit] Explanations
- Hummus is a paste of pureed chickpeas usually mixed with sesame oil or sesame paste and eaten as a dip or sandwich spread.
[edit] Trivia
- The label on the disk in the floppy disk container reads "alone in the dark".
- The YouTube description for this email is "Who will check his emails when Strong Bad retires? Aforementioned Strong Bad tries to find out."
- Since the font called Engravers MT is used, the first quotation mark on Strong Bad's gravestone is backwards.
[edit] Remarks
- Strong Bad uses a disconnected telephone.
- Strong Bad doesn't interview Strong Mad or Homsar, yet they still take part in the dance contest; he also doesn't interview The Cheat.
- The visible "DELET" part of the DELETED text is the same size as the "DELOR" part of Coach Z's "DELORTED". At that size, part of the final D and the exclamation point (which are included in the Flash file) wouldn't fit on the screen.
- When Strong Bad types "DANCE CONTEST!" the initial D appears unusually close to the final period in the preceding ellipsis, probably as a result of trying to avoid splitting the phrase at a line break.
- Homsar's walking sound is not heard as he walks back and forth.
[edit] Goofs
- When The Cheat turns to exit, his nametag switches sides and is reversed.
- The sign above Marzipan normally reads "Thank You". In this email, it appears to be blank due to a positioning error in the Flash file.
- At the end of the email the moon is facing the back of the gravestone, but the shadow is in front of the moon and the other side is bright.
- Marzipan's hair spins in front of her dress, as if it were going through her neck.
- When Strong Bad asks Coach Z for his best "DELETED!", the computer screen displays the text he typed before asking The Cheat about his throne.
[edit] Inside References
- Homestar's repeated use of "crapface" is related to the way he answered his first email in 50 emails.
- Bubs's moves in the dance contest come from the game Dancin' Bubs.
- Strong Bad first kicked The Cheat in little animal.
- Strong Bad previously mentioned gold nuggets in his character video.
[edit] Real-World References
- The Cheat is wearing a blue uniform, typical of Wal-Mart employees, but Strong Bad uses a red phone, typical of Target stores.
- The name "Butkus" refers to Chicago Bears Hall-Of-Fame linebacker Dick Butkus.
- A grill often refers to the dental object people (most prominently rappers) wear on their teeth, but can also mean the mouth/teeth themselves.
- Coach Z's dance is similar to a popular hardcore dance referred to as "Shootin' the arrow".
[edit] Fast Forward
- Marzipan's first scroll button song was later used on the Strong Bad Email Menu, despite him saying that it was the worst song he ever heard.
- Strong Bad would later decide to not die at all in your funeral.
- Marzipan's dance moves would be seen again in nightlife.
- The graves for the eleven former Kings of Town would be shown, in similar style to Strong Bad's grave, in original.
- Strong Sad was shown to have teeth after all in narrator, where he can be seen brushing them. He does this again in concert.
[edit] DVD Version
- The DVD version features hidden creator's commentary. To access it, switch the DVD player's audio language selection while watching.
[edit] Commentary Transcript
(Commentary by: Matt Chapman, Mike Chapman)
MATT: What's he's saying right now is from an old audio recording that I made.
MIKE: Yeah, Matt, before we had a video camera, he and his friend, you know, would just make movies and...
MATT: Radio plays!
MIKE: On, aha, on audio cassette! He had a bad tape recorder.
MATT: And our friend TJ said that, and he could, he was like four or something and couldn't talk very well, or at least couldn't re-memorize lines at the time 'cuz he was so young, and it was called "The Hostess Cake": "Our next show is a family show. It is... The Hostess Cake"... Mike, how did he do that with his voice?! That phone's clearly not plugged in!
MIKE: It's like Coach Z's phone from another cartoon. I dunno. I dunno, Matt. I just make the cartoons.
MATT: That's clearly a Wal-Mart vest that The Cheat is wearing there, I think, Mike.
MIKE: Also, there's "Alone in the Dark" back there. Is that... this is, okay, this is before that horrible "Alone in the Dark" movie that just came out.
MATT: Oh, yeah, did that already come out?
MIKE: Yeah! It was just in the theater for, like, two days.
MATT: Yeah. Bad idea.
{pause}
MIKE: So, what are we— Which one is this? Replacements?
MATT: Yeah, he's trying to find an heir to the throne!
MATT: Oooooh.
{pause until Strong Bad holds up the "Desterhoft" card}
MIKE: {sarcastic "surprised" voice} Hey, that's the name of the guy that sent the email!
MATT: {similar voice} That's a funny name.
MIKE: {imitates the "Deleted" buzzer, then again as Strong Bad deletes the email}
MATT: {of "DELORTED"} Oof. That brown screen is gross. I like it. Now this is our friend Craig Zobel, who... you all know. His favorite thing ever on our website is right here where Bubs attacks Strong Bad.
MIKE: That's just me being ba—being a lazy animator. It wasn't supposed to be funny.
MATT: {partially over the last line} No, that was you being a genius.
MIKE: It wasn't supposed to be funny.
MATT: It's hilarious.
MIKE: Didn't you record Strong Bad singing one of these scroll buttons songs for the scroll button menu?
MATT: Mm-hmm. I did.
MIKE: We oughta use that.
MATT: Never have. Maybe we should. It's been the same one for a while now.
MIKE: Yeah.
MATT: {of the box with Strong Sad's image} That Strong Sad drawing is pretty great. The Cheat clearly drew that for him. {after Strong Bad's "Those are not feet."} What are they called, Mike?
MIKE: Soolnds?
MATT: Soolnd.
{pause}
MATT: Um...
MIKE: So we got a dance party coming up where Coach Z is doing our friend Claire's dance.
MATT: Mm-hmm. I remember... that's a good dance.
MIKE: There it is.
MATT: The Claire dance. I don't know if Claire knows that we have Coach Z doing her dance.
MIKE: Does she know we have a name for her dance?
MATT: I don't know if she knows that either. I hope she doesn't get mad.
MIKE: I did all this. That's why the dances are pretty lame.
MATT: Homestar is singing in a dance contest, Mike. He doesn't, he obviously doesn't know what's going on.
MIKE: Even if it was a singing contest, it was a pretty bad song.
MATT: Yeah.
MIKE: I dunno what he's talking about, but I dunno what he just put on his face.
{they laugh}
MATT: It's a great song, I think. It's very interesting. It makes you wonder. What did— and what happened that spawned that?
MIKE: I don't wanna know.
{pause until The Paper}
MIKE: {sighs} That's it.
MATT: Preeeow.
[edit] Fun Facts
- Hostess is a manufacturer of various snack cakes and pastries, most famously the Twinkie.
- The critically panned 2005 film Alone in the Dark, a box-office failure, was based on the video game of the same name, which was in the Floppy Disk Container in this email.
[edit] External Links
- watch "replacement"
- watch "replacement" on YouTube
- watch "replacement" on the old Flash site
- view the Flash file for "replacement"
- forum thread re: "replacement"