Strong Badia the Free Responses

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"Strong Bad, your star is on the rise!"
Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People has many responses when you talk to various characters and interact with various objects. These are the responses from Strong Badia the Free.

On these pages, A → B (right arrow) means that the response happens when object A is used on thing B, or in the case of talking to other characters, the indicated sequence of chat topic icons are chosen.

A short horizontal line between two or more responses, such as the one above, means only one of the responses is heard at a time, and that the action results in a different response each time it occurs.


[edit] Locations

[edit] Error Messages

{Note: Some items give different responses when used on a person as opposed to when they are used on an object. These responses are given only if a person or object doesn't give a specific response listed on the other response pages. If an item here is lacking a response when used on Strong Bad, he usually just gives the same as the "Person" response. If no response is listed, Strong Bad simply gives one of the general messages.}

[edit] General Messages

[edit] Strong Bad interrupting

[edit] Fake Sword

[edit] Fake Sword → Object

STRONG BAD: This sword is as dull and weak as Strong Sad himself. It can't cut through anything!

[edit] Fake Sword → Person

STRONG BAD: No fake swordplay for me. I don't smell bad enough.

[edit] Glow Stick

[edit] Glow Stick → Object

STRONG BAD: That looks better NOT glowing.

[edit] Glow Stick → Person

STRONG BAD: This is no time for a rave, lightswitch or otherwise.

[edit] Katana

[edit] Katana → Object

STRONG BAD: I don't want to dull the mighty sword's blade.

[edit] Katana → Person

STRONG BAD: Nah, I'll let him live... for now.

[edit] Katana → Strong Bad

STRONG BAD: I know things look bad, but ritual suicide is hardly ever the answer.

[edit] Lighter

[edit] Lighter → Object

STRONG BAD: Won't burn.

STRONG BAD: That's not flammable!

[edit] Lighter → Person

STRONG BAD: I'd love to see him not not on fire, but not not not now.

[edit] Lighter → Strong Bad

STRONG BAD: Man, I'm ALREADY on fire!

[edit] Pilot Wings

[edit] Pilot Wings → Person

STRONG BAD: He's done nothing to deserve these.

[edit] Pilot Wings → Strong Bad

STRONG BAD: Nah, I already know I'm cool. I need to give these to somebody who's not so sure of himself.

[edit] Pottery Shard

[edit] Pottery Shard → Object

STRONG BAD: This thing's an ancient artifact! I gotta be careful with it.

[edit] Pottery Shard → Person

STRONG BAD: After all the crap I went through to get this, I'm not giving it to just anybody.

[edit] Power Strip

[edit] Power Strip → Object

STRONG BAD: That doesn't need power, I need power!

[edit] Power Strip → Strong Bad

STRONG BAD: I can't decipher this ancient Homsartifact on my own. Maybe if I used it somewhere else...

[edit] Pretendix

[edit] Pretendix → Person

STRONG BAD: Nah, it takes a special kind of person to be impressed by a shriveled-up organ in a jar.

[edit] Pretendix → Strong Bad

STRONG BAD: Nah. I've still got my original factory-installed pretendix.

[edit] Strong Bad Doll

[edit] Strong Bad Doll → Object

STRONG BAD: I'm keepin' this little guy with me. Junior appreciates me for who I am.

[edit] Strong Bad Doll → Person

STRONG BAD: Even a tiny, unlicensed version of me is still too awesome for him to handle.

[edit] Three-Ring Binder

STRONG BAD: This is a priceless artifact, apparently! I gotta be careful with it.

[edit] Tony Stony

STRONG BAD: Tony Stony's an important diplomat. I can't just go throwing him around everywhere.

[edit] 100% Completion

STRONG BAD: All right! An extra super special bonus costume! Looks like... {Max Skull-and-Crossbones Shirt appears on screen} ...some kind of cheesy cross-promotional marketing tie-in? Ah, well. Free shirt!

[edit] Hints

{While under house arrest}

STRONG BAD: Man, The Poopsmith left a serious stink shadow in here. I gotta open a window.

{After talking with protestors}

STRONG BAD: My genius ideas of escape aren't working. Maybe if I talk to the throngs of zealots outside I can get some idiotic ones.

{After hearing about the effigy}

STRONG BAD: They call that an 'effigy' of The King of Town?!? I could make a better one with one eye tied behind my ear!

{Before picking up the towel}

STRONG BAD: They say in prison you gotta avoid the showers, but I think I can make an exception.

{Before picking up the pillow}

STRONG BAD: Maybe I can sneak out of here when they do the next laundry delivery. That's a cliche I haven't tried yet.

{Before picking up the couch fluff}

STRONG BAD: All this nothing-doing is wearing me out. Maybe I should go downstairs and take a nap.

{Before picking up the crown}

STRONG BAD: {sorrowfully} I wanna go to my room and look at my souvenirs. Remember when I was a free man!

{Before adding any acquired objects to the effigy}

STRONG BAD: I don't know what to do with all this crap I have. I bet the NOtesters outside could use it.

{Before picking up the Maps & Minions board or attempting to leave The Field without it}

STRONG BAD: Despite the fact that I am a card carrying litterbug, I should probably pick up some of the crap laying around here. It's looking like styhole city!

{Before acquiring the quesos}

STRONG BAD: This map is working pretty good! I wonder if there's anything else in that board game I can use and abuse.

STRONG BAD: I'm gonna need to establish a trade route between Strong Badia and the local merchants. After that, a light snack maybe.

{Before talking to The Cheat}

STRONG BAD: I can't believe everybody ditched Strong Badia like that. At least The Cheat will never let me down.

{After talking with The Cheat}

STRONG BAD: I almost kinda don't really but sort of a little bit feel maybe somewhat bad for being so hard on The Cheat. I should get him something to make him feel special.

STRONG BAD: Stupid The Cheat, thinks he needs more recognition! I recognize that he's being a SEVERE butt-pain! What does he want? A medal?

{Before visiting the black market}

STRONG BAD: How come ya never see Bubs going in and out of the concession stand? Does he have a back entrance or something? OR ARE THERE TWO OF HIM? Nah, prolly the back entrance thing.

{After getting the lighter and talking with Strong Sad}

STRONG BAD: What's taking me so long to beat Strong Sad? He'll fold like a big gray paper as soon as I put the heat to him.

{After burning one of Strong Sad's things}

STRONG BAD: Strong Sad's will is breaking. I just need to turn up the heat to push him over the edge.

{Before annexing Pompomerania}

STRONG BAD: I bet Club Technochocolate is JUMPIN' right about now!

STRONG BAD: I'm gonna have to use all my diplomacy skills on Pom Pom to get him to join up.

STRONG BAD: Can you believe Pom Pom said I don't have style? I'll show him style! My style. I'll show him my style.

{Before picking up a glowstick}

STRONG BAD: If Pom Pom won't join me, I can at least steal everything not nailed down in his cloughb. I'll start around the DJ booth.

{Before picking up the metal detector}

STRONG BAD: Hmmm. Did I remember to not make my bed this morning? Maybe I should go check.

STRONG BAD: There it is again. The feeling that I forgot to forget to make my bed.

{Before speaking with Homsar}

STRONG BAD: As much as I hate what can only be loosely described as "talking" to that guy, I've got to get Homsar to join Strong Badia if I want to reach the castle.

{After speaking with Homsar, but before speaking with Strong Sad}

STRONG BAD: Given that he never shuts up, Strong Sad must be good at language. Maybe he can understand Homsar.

{Before locating all the Homsartifacts}

STRONG BAD: I should start building up my empire's economy, and there's only one practical way to do that: start digging for buried treasure.

STRONG BAD: I gotta get back to treasure huntin'! There's untold riches everywhere! Er... At least sorta told riches.

{In Homsar Reservation, before picking up the Strong Bad doll}

STRONG BAD: If I'm gonna be traveling through all these newly-formed countries, I should pick up some souvenirs before I crush and assimilate them.

{After Strong Sad is sick, but before he complains of fever}

STRONG BAD: I forgot how totally unadaptable Strong Sad is to foreign climates... or the Czar of the Thermostat as we call him at home.

{After Strong Sad is sick, but before Strong Sad complains of shivers}

STRONG BAD: Maybe I should get Strong Sad a "get well soon" gift.

{Before placing all of the Homsartifacts in the pylon}

STRONG BAD: That's a freaky-looking stalact- stalagmi- stalac- rock jutty-outer over there.

STRONG BAD: I'm sick of carrying all this Homsar crap around. It's got to be useful somewhere.

{While carrying the Pretendix}

STRONG BAD: I wonder how much a fat, whiny pretendix is worth, anyway?

{During the Taranchula battle}

STRONG BAD: The only way to kill the Taranchula is to cut both its heads off. Sometimes you just gotta tell it like it is.

{In Country, before picking up the Fake Sword}

STRONG BAD: A two-headed giant taranchula? Looks like Strong Mad's been peeking at the role-playing Munster Manual back in Strong Sad's room.

{In Country, before picking up the Katana}

STRONG BAD: I wonder if Pom Pom's got anything that'd help me beat the Taranchula.

{After failing to destroy the Ice Head}

STRONG BAD: Killing that Taranchula is taking forever! I'd better start a fire and camp here for the night.

{Before the Homestarmy draft}

MARZIPAN: You better not be starting that "Homestarmy" nonsense again.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Homestarmy? Never, lieutenant! I mean, corporal! I mean, Marzipan.

MARZIPAN: I've told you a million times I don't like your friends hanging out at my house. I swear, sometimes I think we should just break up... again.

STRONG BAD: What's Marzipan been doing all this time? She's usually got all kinds of arts and craftsy doo-doo projects she's trying to show off.

{Before drafting Coach Z}

STRONG BAD: If Homestar's going to be any use to my empire at all, he's going to have to build up the Homestarmy with more than small kitchen appliances.

{After receiving Tony Stony}

STRONG BAD: Why did I let Strong Mad give me Tony Stony? I gotta get rid of this thing.

{Before annexing Homsar Reservation}

STRONG BAD: Things are making too much sense. I want to talk to Homsar.

{Before annexing Country}

STRONG BAD: I probably shouldn't leave Strong Mad alone for too long.

STRONG BAD: This empire is going to need a strong military. Who better than my tank of an older brother, Strong Mad? Or Fleshwall Jackson, as I've just started calling him.

{After becoming the new King of Town}

STRONG BAD: One of these doors has GOT to be the way outta here!

{After talking with Strong Sad/Homestar}

STRONG BAD: Stupid The Of Town, thinks he can read all my email! Two can play at that game!

{After finding out about The Of Town's plot}

STRONG BAD: Can The King of Town just make any dumb law he wants?

{After sending a non-effective tax e-mail}

STRONG BAD: I still can't believe The Of Town put a tax on the one thing I use the most. I was RIGHT to start a revolution!

{After the Of Town declares war}

STRONG BAD: Argh, this place is like my grandma's! Drafty, too quiet, and nothing to play but board games!

[edit] Main Menu

[edit] New Game

STRONG BAD: Under my new game, everyone gets ice cream!


[edit] Save/Load

STRONG BAD: {rubbing hands together} Saveload!

STRONG BAD: Savélowad.

STRONG BAD: They ask, "Can this game be saved?" I ask, can this game be loaded?

[edit] Settings

STRONG BAD: {shrugs} Settings?


STRONG BAD: Volume! Widescreen! Your vote counts!

[edit] Quit it

THE KING OF TOWN: {comes in from the left} Death to tyrants!!
STRONG BAD: {shoves him offscreen} Quit it!

STRONG BAD: {pointing at camera} Quit it!

[edit] Preview

STRONG BAD: {suggestively} Scenes from the next episode!

STRONG BAD: Next time on S-B-C-G-4-A-P.

STRONG BAD: I have a dream... of the next episode!
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