8-Bit is Enough Responses (The Field)

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Looks like Strong Bad ended up playing Punch-Out!! instead of TROGDOR!.

Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People has many responses when you talk to various characters and interact with various objects. These are the responses from The Field in 8-Bit is Enough.

On these pages, A → B (right arrow) means that the response happens when object A is used on thing B, or in the case of talking to other characters, the indicated sequence of chat topic icons are chosen.

A short horizontal line between two or more responses, such as the one above, means only one of the responses is heard at a time, and that the action results in a different response each time it occurs.


[edit] Brick Wall

[edit] Algebros

STRONG BAD: Well, if it isn't the Algebros. The edutatining, fireball-chucking stars of Math Kickers. What's the total, brotals?
DEX: {on-screen caption} This 3D world is totally bogus.
RYU: {on-screen caption} We must restore balance!
STRONG BAD: Yeah, I pretty much gotta kill a dragon to get all you guys back where you belong. Wanna come with?
DEX: {on-screen caption} Radical!
RYU: {on-screen caption} We must restore balance!
{The Algebros vanish from the brick wall.}
ON-SCREEN TEXT: THE ALGEBROS have joined your party!
STRONG BAD: Man, it's worth it just to shut those guys' text boxes up.

[edit] Box

STRONG BAD: {looks under the box} It's the box for "Gel-Arshie's Pro Fruitboarder". The free game I got for sending in a bunch of proofs-of-purchase. {disgusted} Free is right. Free of fun.

[edit] Brick Wall

This area is only clickable after applying the logic board to the Trogdor machine.

STRONG BAD: You can usually find Senor Cardgage reading to the pigeons behind here, but now there's just all these burnt chicken bones. I guess Trogdor must've scared them— {realises another theory} Ohhh.

[edit] Gel-Arshie → Brick Wall

GEL-ARSHIE: {appears} Here's a wall that's colored red! {glows red and reveals a box} What's in this box fills me with dread! What's in the box? {hysterically} WHAT'S IN THE BOX?
STRONG BAD: {unsettled} That's just... needlessly creepy. Back into my inventory.
{Gel-Arshie disappears.}

[edit] Bubs' Concession Stand

[edit] On arrival after applying the logic board to the Trogdor machine

{Cue a zoom-in on Marzipan, her expression showing an over-exaggerated feeling of rage. Both she and Bubs are now at the roof of the Concession Stand. She jumps menacingly several times, causing the scaffolding to collapse and vanish.}

STRONG BAD: What was THAT all about?
BUBS: All kinds a' weird goings on, Strong Bad! There was that big flickerin' and flashin' in the sky, and then Marzipan went plumb loco balonco!
{Marzipan tosses several crates during Bubs's lines, jumps viciously after he's finished speaking, and starts tossing the crates again.}
BUBS: See what I mean?
{If Strong Bad has already examined Strong Badia, dialogue continues as follows. If not, the following plays upon arriving after he has done so.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {appears on screen} Oh, is Marzipan having one of her "episodes" again? You just gotta pretend you're listening to her. Let me handle this. {vanishes and re-appears next to Marzipan before speaking half-heartedly} Yes, Marzipan. You're right of course. Good point.
{Marzipan attempts to toss a crate at Homestar, but misses.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Missed me! {dodges another crate} You call that a throw? Give 'er the old one-two!
{Marzipan continues to toss crates; one of which opens another exit in the field.}
STRONG BAD: Hey, that was my favorite bush! I wonder what's behind there...

[edit] Box

STRONG BAD: {looks under the box} It's Stinkoman's shiny round hands. Hmm... I wonder if they can shoot energy balls. Or energy bolts! Or energy blasts!

[edit] Concession Stand

STRONG BAD: Yup, the concession stand is still here.

[edit] Gel-Arshie → Concession Stand

GEL-ARSHIE: {appears} Hey kids, this store is red like me! {glows red and reveals a box} Now here's a thing you couldn't see!
STRONG BAD: Hey, pretty cool. {hostilely} Now get back in my inventory.
STRONG BAD: Relax, Creepshow. I don't like it any more than you do.
{Gel-Arshie disappears.}

[edit] Crate

STRONG BAD: Marzikong was tossing these things around like she's got an infinite supply of 'em.

[edit] Boxer Joe → Crate

{If there are snakes on the crate}
STRONG BAD: {announcer-type voice} Round 1... FIGHT!
{Snake Boxer punches the crate open. The snakes slither back to Strong Bad and he checks out what was inside.}
STRONG BAD: My very own EGA questing hat! I'll be able to do all kinds of stuff in this! Look stone. Get brooch. Talk barkeep. The possibilities are endless!

[edit] Snakes → Crate

STRONG BAD: {puts the snakes on the crate} Have at it, guys. There's probably an ancient relic in there or something, and I know you snakes love that kind of stuff.

{removing the snakes from the crate}
STRONG BAD: Come, my snakes, back into the safety of my pants.

[edit] Marzipan & Bubs

Upon arrival before the logic board is applied

MARZIPAN: You're going to want to reinforce that support beam with a three-quarters Henderson carbon fiber girder.
BUBS: Don't tell me my business, woman! What are ya, a businesswoman?
{First time only}
BUBS: {crankily} Tell that machine to stop all that yappin'! We're trying to get some work done here!
STRONG BAD: Why aren't you behind the stand, Bubs? I got lots o' bootleg VHS movies I want to trade in.
BUBS: {in normal mood} We're closed for remodeling, Strong Bad! {crankily} I gotta fix all the damage YOU did while you were making your movie.
STRONG BAD: So why is Marzipong here? Protesting the construction?
MARZIPAN: Hmpf. Shows how much YOU know, Strong Bad. I'm making sure he does everything to code. I DO have an architectural engineering degree, you know.

STRONG BAD: How's the construction goin', Bubs?
BUBS: {crankily} It'd go a lot faster if you'd stop bugging me and quiet down that dang old arcade machine!

[edit] Bubs

These responses can only be seen after applying the logic board to the Trogdor machine.

BUBS: {ducks down, frantic} Help, Strong Bad!

[edit] Bubs → Marzipan

{First time only}
STRONG BAD: Quit foolin' around and come down here.
BUBS: {angry eyes} What the... who's fooling around? {back to normal eyes} Marzipan went crazy and dragged me up here!
STRONG BAD: Are you gonna let that woman tell you what to do?
BUBS: I will if she tosses a crate at me every time I try to move! Those things hurt!

STRONG BAD: You're at least twice as thick as Marzipan, Bubs! Just get down here.
BUBS: Just 'cause I'm big doesn't mean I like getting a crate in the gut. Find some way to get rid of her!

[edit] Bubs → Logic Board

STRONG BAD: You gotta help me fix that Trogdor machine, Bubs. I think Strong Sad broke the "logic board" or something.
BUBS: {angry eyes} The logic board? Well, that explains everything! {back to normal eyes} You must've broken the 8-Bit Reality Containment Field, causing our universe to combine with the world of viderogames!
STRONG BAD: That's right, STRONG SAD did that. Can you fix it for me? I mean, him?
BUBS: Oh, I've been fixin' logic boards since before you were in double diapers! I can even make it so you can play those foreign-type imported games! {angry eyes} But I won't be able to do jack OR squat until you do something about {back to normal eyes, ducking down} that crazy crate lady!

STRONG BAD: Get down here and help me with this logic board.
BUBS: I already told you! I'll fix that board right up for you, no charge. I'll even make it so you can play imported games! Just get Marzipan away from me!

[edit] Marzipan

These responses can only be seen after applying the logic board to the Trogdor machine.

STRONG BAD: I think I actually like Marzikong better this way.
BUBS: {annoyed} Well I don't! Help me get rid of her!

[edit] Limozeen's Bus → Marzipan

STRONG BAD: Fly, my hair metal rockers! Be free!
{The bus appears above Bubs and Marzipan.}
LARRY PALARONCINI: {voiceover} Moderately hot Babelien off the port bow!
{The bus uses the tractor beam to pick up Marzipan. Crashing noises are then heard from inside.}
LARRY PALARONCINI: {voiceover} Oh crap! It's that crazy chick from the Battle of the Bands! Ow! Stop throwin' those crates, pretty mama! Ow!
{The bus leaves.}
BUBS: {happily, relieved} Thought she'd NEVER leave!
{Cue wipe transition back to the Trogdor machine.}
BUBS: There ya go, Strong Bad. Just stick that back in the machine, and you can play whatever game you want, even those crazy foreign-type games!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {pops up, eyes closed and with a happy facial expression} Yatta!
STRONG BAD: {annoyed} Homestar?!? {to Bubs} I thought once you fixed that thing, I'd be rid of him for good!
BUBS: Ain't gonna be that easy. As long as Trogdor's out runnin' around burnin' everything up, the machine can't be fixed! You're gonna have to take him out old school style! We're talking MEDIEVAL old school!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: And rescue me. Just a reminder. {vanishes}
BUBS: Now I'm gonna see if I can hitch a ride on that Babelien Space Bus! {runs off} Wait up, guys!

[edit] Mysterious Bush

STRONG BAD: Hmmm, another mysterious bush. Mysterious because it's not burning.

[edit] Peasant → Mysterious Bush

STRONG BAD: {places a peasant near the bush} Good job helping me with Trogdor, peasant. Go run off and start a commune or whatever it is you guys do.
{Suddenly, Trogdor runs up and sets both the peasant and the bush on fire. He then chases the peasant away.}
STRONG BAD: Okay, everybody saw that I didn't MEAN to do that.
{Strong Bad finds a Cheat Commandos action figure here.}

[edit] Videlectrix Box

{Strong Bad lifts up the box and grabs the contents therein}
STRONG BAD: It's my new logic board from Videlectrix! Now I just need to install this baby in the Trogdor machine, and we can end this episode early!

[edit] The Field

[edit] Cell Phone

{Strong Bad pulls out the cell phone and dials a number. The phone rings.}
STRONG BAD: Good thing the Videlectrix phone number is the same as the secret code to get a zillion men in Awexome Cross.
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone, while an 8-bit image of them appears off to the side} Videlectrix! We use computers... to make video games.
STRONG BAD: Yeah, {speaks quickly} my Trogdor arcade machine just broke all of a sudden for no reason at all after I didn't do anything to it. And now it's runnin' around all over the place beatin' people up and scaring everyone... {normal} which is actually pretty cool, except now I can't play it.
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Uh... all our operators are busy, so... you've reached our voice mail. If you want to hear about Videlectrix's amazing catalog of all the best games... uh, say "One". If you want to join the Good Graphickateers Club, say "Two". And what else? For our hint line, say "Three".

{Strong Bad pulls out the cell phone and dials a number. The phone rings.}
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone, while an 8-bit image of them appears off to the side} Videlectrix. We use computers... oh, it's you again. You know the drill. Say "1" for the games list, "2" for the Good Graphicketeers, and err... for the hint line, say "3".

{After the logic board arrives near Bubs' Concession Stand}
STRONG BAD: The Videlectrix guys are probably busy making the coolest new games. I better not bother them.

[edit] Cell Phone → 1

VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} For the item-grabbing excitement of Peas-ant's Quest to the side-style scrolling of Stinkom'n 20X6, Videlectrix has the best games for you and your family or inmates.
STRONG BAD: Could I talk to an operator?
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Take a skinny dip into our back-catalog with modern classics like "Lady Crate Ape", "Mista Fixit", "The Spirits of '76", "The Videlectrix Halfathlon" and "The Halls of Tragdor", now with thirty-two kiloherts of real 3Ds!
SECOND VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} That's supposed to be kilobytes, and it's not really 3D.
SECOND VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} You said not to do it.
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} That's right, all three of the glorious Ds!

VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Again? Look, we've made a lot of games for all type graphics computers, so just buy them already! Look it up on our BBS!

[edit] Cell Phone → 2

VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Two, right. The Good Graphicketeers. Send in thirteen proofs of purchase and all kinds of shipping and handling to join the Videlectrix Good Graphicketeers! You'll laugh 'til you puke with our radical new Good Graphicketeer trading cards! Collect all four for a special surprise!
STRONG BAD: Yeah, but—
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone, interrupting} Hang on, gotta do the legal text: {quickly} Surprise may not seem all that special to residents of California, Wyoming and Puerto Rico.

STRONG BAD: Look, man, I know this isn't voice mail. How do I fix my Trogdor machine?
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Processing... command not recognized. Please say "one", "two" or "three".
STRONG BAD: I already—
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone, interrupting, yelling} SAY "ONE", "TWO" OR "THREE"!

[edit] Cell Phone → 3

VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Hint line. Okay, if you're stuck in one of our award-winning adventure-type games, what you're gonna want to do is take every one of your items, and then use it with every other item until you find the right answer.
STRONG BAD: That's supposed to be a hint?

STRONG BAD: Gimme another hint. Ah, I mean, three.
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Oh, I don't know. Just use your clicker on everything. It'll solve itself eventually.

[edit] Cell Phone → 4

VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} You chose option four. That's... er, {softly} which one was option four?
SECOND VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} You know, I... I didn't think we had a "four".
STRONG BAD: Four! Two plus two! Quatro! Double double deuce!
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} All right, all right, you got me. You say you got a problem with your Trogdor cabinet? You're gonna need to put in a new logic board. That'll fix it right up. We'll drop one off next to the concession stand nearest you.
STRONG BAD: Finally!
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} That'll be $149.95. How you wanna pay for that?
STRONG BAD: Uh, the number you have reached is not in service. Please hang up and try again.
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Oh, sorry about that. I'll just—
{Strong Bad turns the phone off and the image of the Videlectrix guys disappears. A box with the V in "Videlectrix" labeled on it falls out of the sky and lands next to Bubs' Concession Stand.}

[edit] Redcoat Ghost

STRONG BAD: Intriguing.

STRONG BAD: Not so intriguing.

[edit] Trogdor Machine

Note that using the key on the Trogdor Machine has the same effect for the first two responses.

Before Homestar starts playing
{First time only. Strong Bad advances on the Trogdor arcade machine, but the beefy arm sticking out of him socks him in the face}
{Strong Bad falls on the ground, then gets back up}
STRONG BAD: Can't get anywhere near that thing. Maybe Dumplo was right for once.
{Cut to a closeup of Strong Bad's face. An image of Strong Sad appears beside him}
STRONG SAD: You'd have to be some type of idiot to take on Trogdor alone.
{Strong Sad disappears as he says, "Some type of idiot" repeatedly. Meanwhile, Homestar walks into Strong Badia, behind Strong Bad}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey, Strong Bad! Whatcha doin'?

{Strong Bad advances on the Trogdor arcade machine, but the beefy arm sticking out of him socks him in the face}
{Strong Bad falls on the ground, then gets back up}
STRONG BAD: I better cut that out. It's starting to knock the husk out of my naturally husky head.
While Homestar is playing on it
STRONG BAD: Homestar's using his head as a distraction. Now's my chance to fix the machine!
After using the logic board on the machine
STRONG BAD: It's even more broken than before! At least it's less punchy now.
After seeing Strong Badia's destruction
STRONG BAD: Get in the game... all right, let's do this!
{Strong Bad transforms into the low-res 3D render from SBCG4AP Advertisement, his Atari sprite, and finally his Secret Collect sprite, before going inside the Trogdor machine.}
In extended play
{Strong Bad stands in front of the machine and grabs the controls. The screen transitions to Trogdor's 3D-Ungeon.}
STRONG BAD: All right! It's Trogdor, bigger and badder than ever!
{The game starts.}

[edit] Lucky Quarter → Trogdor Machine

STRONG BAD: No, no. HOMESTAR is the one who has to pay to use my Trogdor machine.

[edit] Key → Trogdor Machine

While Homestar is playing on it
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {continues to take a beating} Ow. Ow.
{Strong Bad unlocks the cabinet door.}
After opening it
STRONG BAD: It's already unlocked.

[edit] Logic Board → Trogdor Machine

When the cabinet door is closed
STRONG BAD: {Pokes at the door a bit} It's locked! Strong Sad keeps promising to fix this thing, maybe HE knows how to open it.
When the cabinet door is open
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {continues to take a beating} Ow. Cut it out. Hey, good shot! Ow. Ow.
STRONG BAD: {starts inserting the logic board} Man, smells like burning wet The Cheat all down in here.
{The cell phone rings.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {answering machine message} You've reached out and touched Homestar Runner. Please leave a massage.
{Strong Bad places the cell phone on the ground.}
VIDELECTRIX GUY: {on phone} Hey, Videlectrix here. Our legal department wanted to remind you not to install that logic board around anything that's been exposed to radiation... {Homestar starts glowing again.} ...because it could potentially cause the end of existence as we know it. Okay, thanks! {hangs up}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {dizzily} Hey Strong Bad, could you finish my game for me? I'm feeling a little woozy.
STRONG BAD: {continues to put the logic board into the machine} Almost... got it...
{Cut to a view of the Earth from space. A series of white ripples is seen from where Free Country, USA is located. Cut to various shots of the cast in silhouette being blinded by the white light. Finally, cut back to the cabinet, now standing lifeless, with Strong Bad lying near it. The metal detector and cell phone, both lying nearby, flash and then disappear.}
STRONG BAD: {stands up} Well, that was easy and extremely painful. I better go trick somebody into carrying this machine back into the basement for me.
{A roar is heard from nearby.}
STRONG BAD: {turns towards the sound, panicked} That sounded like it was coming from Strong Badia!

[edit] The Gremlin

[edit] Cool Car

STRONG BAD: {in his Dangeresque voice} Dangecar...esque. Full auto-pilot! Razor tipped sawblade hubcaps! Ejector hatch! And a top speed of zero miles per hour. {turns to the camera} Model shown with no equipment.

{First time after using the logic board on the Trogdor arcade machine}
STRONG BAD: {in his Dangeresque voice} Dangecar...esque. Full auto-pilot! Razor tipped sawblade hubcaps! And... {sees two 8-bit snakes slithering on the hood} Snakes?? {turns to the camera} I don't remember adding snakes. Why didn't I remember to add snakes?
{He takes the snakes, then writhes}
STRONG BAD: Note to self: Best place for keeping a tangle of writhing snakes: Not my pants.

[edit] Mista Fixit → Cool Car

STRONG BAD: {deviously} Hmmm, I wonder if Mista Fixit could fixit the car to actually run and go places!
{The Poopsmith appears and attempts to repair the Gremlin. Not long after, the boxart for Mista Fixit appears on screen.}
STRONG BAD: {puzzled} The box for "Mista Fixit" was stuck in the carburetor? That's the last time I trust Strong Mad's auto repair skills. {turns towards the Poopsmith} Oh well, nice try, Mista Fixit. Back into my inventory!
{The Poopsmith disappears.}

[edit] Redcoat Ghost

Only appears after using the logic board on the Trogdor arcade machine

STRONG BAD: Awesome!

STRONG BAD: Intriguing!

STRONG BAD: N-n-n-not so intriguing.

[edit] Limozeen Space Machine

[edit] On arrival after applying the logic board to the Trogdor machine

{Strong Bad sees the Limozeen tourbus from Limozeen's Hot Babelien Odyssey arrive and crash onto a bush near the Drive-Thru Whale.}
LARRY PALARONCINI: {voiceover} Aw, no way! I told you we shoulda taken the Space Jersey Turnpike!

[edit] Bush

STRONG BAD: No way I'm getting that bus out of there without professional help.

[edit] Space Bus

{first time only}

STRONG BAD: Is that... the Limozeen Space Machine?
LARRY PALARONCINI: {appears on screen as a pixelated head of himself} Well all right!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {appears on screen, excited} Oh my gosh Limozeen Larry, I love ya! Will you sign my UI window?
STRONG BAD: What happened to you guys?
LARRY PALARONCINI: We were jammin' through space lookin' for hot babeliens to beam aboard, when all of a sudden - squidelee-doo! There was a bright flash, and we ended up here!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh no! What can we do to help you rock, rock on?
LARRY PALARONCINI: {head vanishes, bus starts shaking with his speech} This bus ain't goin' NOwhere unless we can get a tow!
{Homestar vanishes.}

STRONG BAD: Is the space machine a-rockin'?
LARRY PALARONCINI: {voiceover} Can't rock the space machine without hot babeliens! You gotta get us towed outta here so we can start beamin' 'em back on board!

[edit] Innkeeper → Space Bus

INNKEEPER: {appears and walks towards the bus, then speaks with text displayed} What am I supposed to do with this? This isn't like any carriage I've ever seen.
STRONG BAD: Oh come on! It's a SPACE carriage. That's the best KIND of carriage!
INNKEEPER: {text displayed} Eh, what do I know? I'm just a simple peasant.
{The Innkeeper crouches down and applies a hammer over the bush. Trogdor sneaks up from behind, burns the bush, sets the Innkeeper on fire and starts chasing him. The bus is freed.}
STRONG BAD: {excited} Pyrotechnics!
LARRY PALARONCINI: {voiceover} Well all right! Just point us at the Babeliens and let us do our thing!
STRONG BAD: {curiously} Uh, what type Babeliens are you guys looking for, anyway?
LARRY PALARONCINI: {voiceover} Hey man, Limozeen don't discriminate. We'll beam up any type o' lady who wants to PARTAY!
{The bus disappears.}

[edit] Snap Shak

[edit] Any clothing item → Strong Bad

The following lines are spoken only occasionally, but in order, when some item is put on. If an item has a unique line listed below, that line is always spoken the first time the item is put on, and only the first time.
STRONG BAD: Soak it in, ladies.

STRONG BAD: Styles upon styles!

STRONG BAD: Who, me?

STRONG BAD: Let's-a do lunch.

STRONG BAD: Whatever, baby.

STRONG BAD: I'm on a collision course with sultriness...



STRONG BAD: Check me out!

STRONG BAD: Is this me or what?

STRONG BAD: Why yes, I HAVE done some modeling before.

STRONG BAD: Lookin' good!

STRONG BAD: Jarring!

STRONG BAD: Ohh, ah-ha-ha!

STRONG BAD: Do you have the time?

[edit] Hats

[edit] Carabowdit Hair → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: What? Yeah, it's a girl's wig, so what? I got book smarts! I don't need look smarts!
[edit] Homestar's Head → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: {In Homestar voice} Oh, hewwo. I'm a no-armed whitey. I wrote the book on having a stupid butt. It's called "Tennis Pwactice for Jeffwey".
[edit] Knit Cap → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: I'm ready for the big heist! Those smoky red laser beams don't stand a chance when I'm in this get up!
[edit] Red Chef Hat → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: Today we're making The Cheat a L'Orange. It's considered a delicacy in East Strong Badia.

[edit] Shirts

[edit] Max Shirt → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: This is the most rarest, awesomest shirt ever! I have got to get a picture of me in this to make all my friends jeal-aws! Man, they only wish they had this hotness!
[edit] Sports Jacket → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: I'll see you in court! Or Wall Street! ...or something.
[edit] Trogdor Shirt → Strong Bad

[edit] Accessories

[edit] Championship Belt → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: Well that's right, announcerman, the Sizzle-Weight Belt is back where it belongs! And Jack-em-up Kid, you're going down! ... kid.
[edit] Thin Mustache → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: {In Old-Timey Strong Bad voice} I'll tie you to the dastardly train tracks! And wear a cape for no good reason!

[edit] Outfits

[edit] King of Town's Crown + King of Town's Beard → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: Doo-hoo-hoo! I'm the King of Town! Faaaat! Faaaaaaaaaaaat! That's the sound of me breathing.
[edit] Thin Mustache + Beret → Strong Bad
STRONG BAD: {In a fake French accent} Oh, Mademoiselle! Oh, Cosmopolitan! Oh, Elle! Oh, Vogue! Oh... how you say... Redbook?

[edit] Box

STRONG BAD: {looks under the box} It's a Good Graphicketeers Trading Card! This one's for the Reverse Stainless Steel French Press trick in Gel-Arshie's Pro Fruitboarder.

[edit] The Stick

STRONG BAD: Keep on stickin' it out, Sticky.

{After applying the logic board to the Trogdor machine}
STRONG BAD: At least Trogdor spared the Stick. I don't know what we'd do without you, my pointy little pal.

[edit] Strong Badia

[edit] On arrival after using the logic board on the Trogdor machine

{Strong Bad is greeted by the whole of Strong Badia on fire. Nearby is Trogdor, roaring proudly near the Bear Holding a Shark.}
STRONG BAD: {in disbelief} Trogdor? NOOOOO!! Bad Trogdor! Heel!
{Trogdor breathes fire towards Strong Bad, missing, and runs off.}
STRONG BAD: {anguished} My poor kingdom!! You were never supposed to burninate MY countryside! I thought we were BFF's! {turns towards the camera, gesturing with his hands} That's Burninating Friends Foreva!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {suddenly appears in a pop-up window near Strong Bad} Uh... hey, Strong Bad. Is this a bad time?
STRONG BAD: I wasn't crying! Wait... Homestar? Where are you?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I'm in your interface. Pretty cool, huh?
STRONG BAD: {annoyed} Well get out! I've got enough to worry about without you gettin' all up in my HUD {pronounced "hood"} like some kinda pop-up spam!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, that's a problem. I think I'm stuck in this videogame unless you can find a way to get me out. {shifts closer to Strong Bad} By the way, did you know that Total Load can enlarge your vectroid region by 27 percent? {his window increases in size} Click here to find out how! {vanishes}
STRONG BAD: {heavily agitated} ARRRGH!! First the burnination of Strong Badia... now I've got HomeSpam! Trogdor, you messed with the wrong player character this time! I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I have no other choice... I must... KILL... TROGDOR!!! {pauses, before turning to the camera} Uh, anybody know how to kill a dragon?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {re-appears} Hey! Listen! Those guys in videogames are always killing dragons! Have you tried getting into the videogame and asking one o' them?
STRONG BAD: How am I supposed to get in the game?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {inspirational speech} You wanna get in the game, you gotta WANT it! {The camera focuses on the open cabinet door on the Trogdor Machine.} Be the ball! Live your dreams! Believe in yourself! You never get a second chance to make a first impression! {The camera focuses itself back to Strong Bad.} Now are you gonna get in there and show that dragon who's end boss?
STRONG BAD: {confidently} Yeah!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I can't hear you! But I'm gonna assume you said "yeah". The acoustics in this videogame are TERRIBLE. {vanishes}

[edit] Flag

STRONG BAD: The mighty flag of Strong Badia, a beacon of hope to all who loves fences and dirt. {faces the camera} And probably lots of chocolate.

{After Strong Badia is destroyed}
STRONG BAD: How can Trogdor burninate my flag? He and that snake holding a big knife are practically cousins!

[edit] Homestar

At intervals while at the scene
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Quarter... oh, quarter! Why did you leave me?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I know that thing's around here somewheres...

When choosing to speak with him, first time only
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Uh-oh! Don't look now, but look at that thing over there!
STRONG BAD: Calm down, Homestar; it's just a rampaging Trogdor arcade machine.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Never mind that; I'm talkin' 'bout that walk-'em-up videro game over there! Ooh, I wanna play it so bad!
STRONG BAD: So... why don't you go over and play it?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {sadly} Because I lost my lucky video game quarter.

[edit] Homestar → Trogdor

STRONG BAD: Today's your lucky day, Homestar! You get to help me fix the Trogdor machine!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {excited} I DO?!? What do I do? What do I do?
STRONG BAD: Just stand in front and try to play it while I open up the back.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh, I'm all over it! I'm great at standing in front of things!
STRONG BAD: Yep, you're a regular standing Stan! Now let's go!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Can't, man. I gotta stay here in case my lucky quarter comes back! What if he shows up and I'm gone? {worried} He'll be so scared and lonely. He'll just be standing there holding his sno-cone and crying... {becomes deeply anguished} ...while everybody looks at him. {sniffs}

STRONG BAD: Just go play the Trogdor machine, already. It doesn't even TAKE quarters.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Homestar Runner knows two rules of the arcade: don't try to eat the fruit on the screen, no matter how delicious it looks; and never play without your lucky quarter!

[edit] Homestar → Quarter

STRONG BAD: What was all that yibber-yabber about a lucky quarter?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Lucky George has gotten me through a lot of tough jams: Street Masher, Street Masher 2, Street Masher 2: Slightly Different Costumes Edition... That quarter and I are arcade legends in five countries!
STRONG BAD: Yeah, yeah, you're a pinball wizard. But why are you trespassing in Strong Badia?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Because it's here! I can't find heads or tails of it, but something deep down in my gut tells me Lucky George is close by!

STRONG BAD: All right, all right. I'll help you find your quarter.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Thanks, Strong Bad! You're the eleventh best friend a guy could have.

STRONG BAD: I'll help you find that quarter.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh boy! Where is it?
[edit] Homestar → Quarter → Angel
STRONG BAD: Where'd you have it last?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Well, there was the pie-eating contest this morning, and then that hour I spent saying "Hey Marzipan, guess what!" to Marzipan, and then Coach Z bet me a moist Benjamin I couldn't catch the quarter in my mouth, and then I came here and must've dropped it. But if anybody can dig it up, you can! I hear you're the best digger in Cairo!

STRONG BAD: It's gotta be around here somewhere.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: It's always in the third-to-last place I look.
STRONG BAD: {puzzled} Uh... what?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I always like to look a few extra times to make sure I found it. But if anybody can dig it up, you can!

{After obtaining the coin}
STRONG BAD: You swallowed it.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {bitterly} Step off! Don't even joke about that! That lucky quarter keeps me a champion! From videogames, to track and field, to gambling on whether or not I can catch said lucky quarter in my mouth...

STRONG BAD: I'm telling you Homestar, you swallowed it.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Get serious for real, Strong Bad. If only we had some kind of detector that detect metal things...I'm getting hungry again just thinking about it.
[edit] Homestar → Quarter → Devil
STRONG BAD: Yeah, I just saw it next to that Trogdor machine.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh boy! Wait here! {runs to the machine, crouches down to look just before Trogdor punches him, and walks back disappointed} Nope, I don't see it! {goes back to the machine, and crouches down before Trogdor could punch him} Whooops, my foot's untied. {walks back}

STRONG BAD: I swear I saw it next to the Trogdor Machine.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: I'm on it! {runs to the machine, crouches down to look just before Trogdor punches him, and walks back disappointed} Nope, I don't see it!

[edit] Homestar → Cell Phone

Only available before obtaining the phone

STRONG BAD: Homestar, let me borrow your cell phone.
HOMESTAR RUNNER: No can do, Stro Bro. I haven't seen it since that time I saw you before the Race to the End of the Race. And then somebody started making prank calls on it imitating your voice. And then I heard that ringing coming from your bedroom. {getting angry} Hey, wait a second... What was I doing in your bedroom? Sounds pretty fishy if you ask me.

[edit] Key → Homestar

STRONG BAD: Nah, I don't trust Homestar inside my house, much less my Trogdor machine. I just need him to stand in front of it.

[edit] Metal Detector → Homestar

{The Metal Detector is responding as if it's almost found something metal.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {excited} Whoa! Did you find my quarter? Lucky George, here boy! Ooh, it's so close I can TASTE it! I'll just step over here so you can get to digging it up!
{Homestar steps away, but the detector's reactions slows down as he did so.}
{Homestar walks back to his original position. The detector's reactions speed up.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: There it is again! It must be on the move!
STRONG BAD: {points the detector towards Homestar's torso; the "metal found" riff is heard} Uh, Homestar... {points the detector back to the floor} ...did you swallow your lucky quarter?
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Of course not! And it certainly didn't taste anything like butterscotch!
{Strong Bad points the detector back towards Homestar's torso. A radiant glow then shines around him, revealing that the quarter is inside his stomach.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: You must be using it wrong. Let me try. {takes the detector} Sounds like Lucky George is on the move! I'll find him! {walks off and stops near the Trogdor machine} Whoa! Did you hear that? {bends down to his left, dodging a punch from Trogdor} It MUST be around here! {bends down to his right, dodging another punch, before standing up and throwing the detector on the ground} Your so-called "metal detector" must be broken, I don't see it anywh-
{Trogdor FINALLY lands a punch to the back of Homestar's head.}
{The coin flies out of Homestar's mouth, hits Strong Bad's head and lands on the ground. He picks it up while Homestar walks back to Strong Badia.}

[edit] Quarter → Homestar

STRONG BAD: Yo, mushbrain. {pulls out the quarter} Check out what your slimy innards horked up!
HOMESTAR RUNNER: {receives the quarter} Lucky George! All right SB, lemme at that Trogga machine!
{Homestar walks towards the machine, places the quarter inside and starts playing it. He doesn't flinch at all when getting punched by Trogdor's beefy arm.}
STRONG BAD: Ouch. It's a good thing Homestar's head is so soft, spongy, and... y'know... empty.

[edit] Sign

STRONG BAD: {reads it} Strong Badia. Population: Tire.

{After Strong Badia is destroyed}
STRONG BAD: {anguished} Strong Badia. Population: Tragedy.

[edit] Tire

STRONG BAD: Nothin' like a derelict tire to bring down property values.

{After Strong Badia is destroyed}
STRONG BAD: {anguished} Poor Tire! {suddenly becomes hopeful} Actually, a burnt tire just might increase Strong Badia's property values.

[edit] The Whale

[edit] Drive-Thru Whale

DRIVE-THRU WHALE: Welcome to Blubb-o's. Please hold.
STRONG BAD: Uh... okay. {long pause} How about—
DRIVE-THRU WHALE: {interrupts} Not yet.
{Another long pause}
DRIVE-THRU WHALE: Okay, now. Can I fake disorder please?

DRIVE-THRU WHALE: Please maintain a safe distance from the hot oil spray.
STRONG BAD: {backs away slightly} How far is a safe distance?

DRIVE-THRU WHALE: Our fatty melts come scattered, smothered, covered, and humiliated.

DRIVE-THRU WHALE: Freeze-dried Mormons at the second window.

{After applying the logic board to the Trogdor machine}
{The whale plays a random Videlectrix game sound effect with the caption "Sound check mode" appearing above its head.}

[edit] Game Epilogue

{The white screen from escaping Trogdor's lair fades out near the Trogdor machine. Strong Bad is seen sleeping near it.}
STRONG BAD: {mumbling} Rhino... RhinoFeeder... {wakes up and stands up} Ahh!
{Ahead of him, he sees Homestar, Bubs, Marzipan and Strong Mad standing nearby.}
HOMESTAR RUNNER: Are you okay, Strong Bad?
STRONG BAD: {excitedly} I just had the most pixelated dream! {points at Homestar} And you were there... {points at Marzipan} ...and you were there... and...
{Strong Bad notices that Trogdor is also standing nearby.}
STRONG BAD: Uh oh. You were there.
{Trogdor roars and starts chasing after the group, knocking over the camera with his fire breath as he does so. The credits start rolling. After much chasing, he goes to the camera and sets the circuits on fire, causing the screen to turn black.}
{The rest of the credits run to another set of credits, this time featuring all the characters that appeared in the game. An instrumental version of Please Stop Trying to Handle My Style is heard in the background.}
{At the end of the credits sequence, Strong Bad's concept art of himself and The Cheat shows up over the top of the 3D model of said design. The text "The End" appears to the right.}
ON-SCREEN TEXT: Extended Play Unlocked!
{Cut back to the main menu.}
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