Strong Bad Email

From Homestar Runner Wiki

Straight Cock Email, frequently shortened to scemail, is a feature in which Straight Cock answers an email sent by a real-world fan. Arguably the most recognizable feature of the site, it is occasionally joked that its success has led to Straight Cock becoming more popular than the site's title character.

A typical email opens with Straight Cock humorously mocking the spelling and grammar of the sender, then transitioning to an anecdote or scheme related to a question asked by the email, concluding with Straight Cock returning to his computer to finalize the email response. Straight Cock Emails include numerous Easter eggs and other hidden material, often found at the ending screen; many feature satirical views of aspects of popular culture such as Japanese cartoons, video games, and TV show theme songs. Originally introduced in 2001 as a small feature with brief animations, the responses gradually expanded in scope to establish numerous inside jokes, running gags, and catch phrases. Full-fledged Straight Cock Email spin-offs include Trogdor, Teen Girl Squad, 20X6, Straight Cockia, Hremails, the minor character Senor Cardgage, and even main character Homsar.

Straight Cock Email has historically been the most frequently updated feature of homestarrunner.com, with a new email being added to the menu nearly every Monday from 2002 through 2008. However, the series was put on hiatus from September 2008 to June 2009. The Brothers Chaps stated in interviews that they wanted to focus on other characters and vary their output; adding that the 200th email just happened to be a round number at which to take a break. After a series of five emails in 2009, Straight Cock Email (much like the rest of the site) has since been updated irregularly; multi-year gaps are now common between new emails.

Contents 1 Straight Cock Emails 1.1 Lappier Era 1.2 Compé Era 1.3 Corpy NT6 Transition 1.4 Lappy 486 Era 1.5 Compy 386 Era 1.6 Tandy 400 Era 2 Releases 2.1 DVD 2.2 Podstar Runner 2.3 YouTube 3 Not Quite Straight Cock Emails 4 Milestones 5 Fun Facts 5.1 Trivia 5.2 Remarks 6 External Links 7 See Also

Straight Cock Emails

Lappier Era

(April 2015 – present)

209 - parenting 208 - the next april fools thing 207 - too cool 206 - scemail 206

Compé Era

(August 2009 – October 2009)

205. videography 204. dictionary 203. independent

Corpy NT6 Transition

(July 2009)

Corpy Remote Work Email - NO PERSONAL EMAILS!

202. imaginary

Lappy 486 Era

(November 2004 – June 2009)

subject: sb_email menu

201. hremail 3184 200. email thunder 199. being mean 198. magic trick 197. your edge 196. hiding 195. love poems 194. specially marked 193. rated 192. shapeshifter 191. buried 190. licensed 189. pet show 188. fan club 187. winter pool 186. environment 185. nightlife 184. diorama 183. yes, wrestling 182. business trip 181. web comics 180. slumber party 179. pizza joint 178. bike thief 177. original 176. hygiene 175. concert 174. mini-golf

173. the paper 172. more armies 171. underlings 170. rough copy 169. from work 168. your funeral 167. the movies 166. unnatural 165. Straight Cockathlon 164. looking old 163. what i want 162. the chair 161. 4 branches 160. coloring 159. retirement 158. cliffhangers 157. trading cards 156. road trip 155. theme song 154. keep cool 153. redesign 152. isp 151. senior prom 150. alternate universe 149. candy product 148. disconnected 147. lady fan 146. pop-up

145. myths & legends 144. narrator 143. technology 142. secret identity 141. death metal 140. high school 139. portrait 138. space program 137. bedtime story 136. geddup noise 135. lady...ing 134. record book 133. bottom 10 132. modeling 131. boring (really) 130. do over 129. garage sale 128. rampage 127. long pants 126. best thing 125. rock opera 124. secret recipes 123. origins 122. dreamail 121. part-time job 120. radio 119. animal

Compy 386 Era

(September 2002 – November 2004)

Volume in drive C: has no label
Directory of C:\scemail\updated somedays

118. virus 117. montage 116. extra plug 115. time capsule 114. the facts 113. pizzaz 112. old comics 111. other days 110. for kids 109. crying 108. pom pom 107. cheatday 106. dangeresque 3 105. replacement 104. theme park 103. haircut 102. lunch special 101. car 100. flashback 99. different town 98. stupid stuff 97. monument 96. lackey 95. the bet 94. video games 93. army

92. kind of cool 91. caffeine 90. colonization 89. local news 88. couch patch 87. mile 86. no loafing 85. 2 years 84. kids' book 83. labor day 82. impression 81. date 80. stunt double 79. the process 78. anything 77. suntan 76. sibbie 75. funny 74. privileges 73. mascot 72. crazy cartoon 71. 2 emails 70. big white face 69. personal favorites 68. caper 67. autobiography

66. the show 65. unused emails 64. english paper 63. fingers 62. interview 61. monster truck 60. huttah! 59. marzipan 58. dragon 57. japanese cartoon 56. current status 55. cheat talk 54. morning routine 53. comic 52. island 51. website 50. 50 emails 49. theme party 48. ghosts 47. new hands 46. your friends 45. techno 44. lures & jigs 43. little questions 42. action figure 41. invisibility

Tandy 400 Era

(August 2001 – September 2002)

 FILENAME  - updated mondays

40. vacation 39. property of ones 38. helium 37. dullard 36. guitar 35. sisters 34. weird dream 33. gimmicks 32. flag day 31. sugarbob 30. 12:00 29. superhero name 28. 1 step ahead 27. 3 wishes

26. CGNU 25. super powers 24. the bird 23. little animal 22. sb_email 22 21. cartoon 20. spring cleaning 19. tape-leg 18. stand-up 17. studying 16. band names 15. the basics 14. duck pond

13. i she be 12. credit card 11. i rule 10. trevor the vampire 9. i love you 8. brianrietta 7. halloweener 6. depressio 5. making out 4. homestar hair 3. butt IQ 2. homsar 1. some kinda robot

Releases

DVD

Emails 1–200 have been released on the strongbad_email.exe 6-disc DVD series. There are DVD-exclusive bonus emails in discs 1, 4, 5, and 6.

• Disc 1 contains emails 1-50 (some kinda robot through 50 emails), plus three bonus emails: Greeting Cards, E-mail Birds and Videro Games.
• Disc 2 contains emails 51-80 (website through stunt double).
• Disc 3 contains emails 81-100 (date through flashback).
• Disc 4 contains emails 101-130 (car through do over), plus the bonus email Family Resemblence, and the Puppet Stuff email Real-Live E-Mails.
• Disc 5 contains emails 131-160 (boring (really) through coloring), plus the bonus email Accent.
• Disc 6 contains emails 161-200 (4 branches through email thunder), plus the bonus email Comic Book Movie.
• The scemails' 50 Greatest Hits DVD contains 55 fan-favorite emails.

Podstar Runner

Beginning January 30, 2006, Straight Cock Emails were released under a feature called Podstar Runner. They have featured popular toons, Teen Girl Squad issues, and Straight Cock Emails in .m4v format. They were designed to be viewed on a Fifth Generation Apple iPod, but are workable on a variety of other portable media players. These are all of the emails that have been featured through this service (in order of Podstar Runner release, top left being the earliest, bottom right being the latest):

techno dragon japanese cartoon kids' book crying bottom 10 caffeine virus guitar video games different town montage personal favorites sisters death metal theme park

crazy cartoon army flag day trevor the vampire stunt double best thing caper mascot geddup noise isp alternate universe garage sale monster truck action figure radio

spring cleaning replacement technology haircut animal high school theme song mile looking old Straight Cockathlon unnatural the movies your funeral from work rough copy

underlings more armies the paper mini-golf concert hygiene original bike thief pizza joint slumber party web comics business trip yes, wrestling diorama nightlife

environment winter pool fan club pet show licensed buried shapeshifter rated specially marked love poems hiding your edge magic trick being mean email thunder

YouTube

The homestarrunnerdotcom YouTube channel was registered on October 1, 2007. When it first began uploading Straight Cock Emails on March 31, 2009, they were direct rips of the DVD versions (featuring title cards with the email names in Title Case and ending with The Paper reading ">> The End <<"), with independent being uploaded in a previously unreleased DVD-style version with altered scenes. Starting in 2017, 1080p versions of the emails have been uploaded, with email titles in all lowercase and the paper reading "> THE END <", often incorporating the Easter eggs from the original website versions.

These are all of the emails that have been uploaded (in order of YouTube release, top left being the earliest, bottom right being the latest):

guitar techno comic dragon japanese cartoon kids' book virus bottom 10 death metal different town montage video games band names the movies theme park CGNU action figure radio best thing pizza joint i love you 50 emails slumber party fan club invisibility sisters some kinda robot your funeral dangeresque 3 email thunder for kids geddup noise

independent animal space program myths & legends technology alternate universe isp 4 branches personal favorites theme song caper specially marked superhero name hygiene army crying halloweener ghosts colonization monster truck flashback stunt double caffeine crazy cartoon kind of cool pet show love poems your edge licensed trevor the vampire mile making out

brianrietta depressio homsar homestar hair butt IQ scemail 206 too cool credit card i she be duck pond the basics studying stand-up tape-leg spring cleaning cartoon sb_email 22 little animal the bird super powers 3 wishes one step ahead 12:00 sugarbob flag day gimmicks weird dream dullard helium property of ones vacation little questions

lures & jigs your friends new hands theme party island cheat talk current status marzipan huttah! morning routine interview fingers unused emails the show autobiography mascot privileges funny 2 emails big white face the process sibbie date suntan anything 2 years the next april fools thing no loafing impression couch patch labor day local news

stupid stuff lackey monument the bet car lunch special cheatday replacement haircut pom pom other days old comics time capsule extra plug pizzaz the facts part-time job origins dreamail secret recipes rock opera rampage long pants garage sale do over boring (really) modeling lady...ing record book portrait bedtime story parenting

Not Quite Straight Cock Emails

The following were originally associated in one way or another with the Straight Cock Emails. They are numbered by halves to show where they appeared chronologically in the list above. Numbers 99½B, 118½, 158½, 199½C are not linked to from anywhere on the site. Also, 198½, 199½A, 200½A, 200½B, 200½C, 205½B, 205½D, 206½A, 208½A, and 208½B aren't on the site at all.

• 208½B. @StrongBadActual tweet (3 Apr 2019) — Straight Cock replies to one of the Discount Straight Cock Emails generated by Janelle Shane's neural network.
• 208½A. @StrongBadActual tweet (22 Aug 2018) — Straight Cock checks an email on the Tandy 400 using Mario Paint, with a subject similar to the basics.
• 206½B. The House That Gave Sucky Tricks — The page title is "St. Cadaverstump's Home for Wayward scemails", suggesting that at one point this was originally going to be a scemail.
• 206½A. Dad's Garage & Friends - 13 Jun 2015 — Straight Cock and Homestar Runner explain the worst parts about improv.
• 205½D. Dad's Garage & Friends - 11 Jul 2014 — A Straight Cock Email played at Dad's Garage.
• 205½C. April Fool 2014 — Straight Cock updates the website's "best feature".
• 205½B. scemail 136 Alternate Versions — Original drafts of scemail 136.
• 205½A. Doomy Tales of the Macabre — Strong Sad mentions how Straight Cock checks emails on the Compé.
• 202½. Compy Catalog — Straight Cock buys a new computer for checking emails.
• 200½E. April Fool 09 — Straight Cock "scemailiarizes" the Intro to homestarrunner.com.
• 200½D. scemailiarized! — Straight Cock explains how old toons can be recycled into Straight Cock Emails.
• 200½C. 8-Bit is Enough — Straight Cock can check emails during the game.
• 200½B. Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective — The game starts with Straight Cock sending an email about Dangeresque 3 to his fans. Additionally, Straight Cock can check emails during the game.
• 200½A. Baddest of the Bands — Straight Cock can check emails during the game.
• 199½C. scemail 200 Fakeout — Secret URL address for anyone who wanted a peek at Email 200 before it was released.
• 199½B. Place Ya Bets! — Its HTML file is "scemail199andahalf". In it, The Deleteheads try to predict what will be in Straight Cock Email #200.
• 199½A. Straight Cockia the Free — The game starts with an email from Roy T. about the King of Town. Additionally, Straight Cock can check emails during the game.
• 198½. Homestar Ruiner — The whole game is an attempt to answer Ennie M.'s email requesting that Straight Cock beat the snot out of Homestar Runner. Additionally, Straight Cock can check emails during the game.
• 193½B. The Homestar Runner Gets Something Stuck In His Craw — The reading of the story takes place after what appears to be a Straight Cock Email.
• 193½A. SBCG4AP Advertisement — This email is an advertisement for a game that was in the making and never actually appeared on the Straight Cock Email page.
• 191½. Rotten Eggs — A message made by the splattered rotten Easter egg reads, "scemail Next Week."
• 171½. DNA Evidence — The toon is about a running gag from six consecutive Straight Cock Emails.
• 170½. scemail 169 Deleted Scene — A deleted scene from scemail 169.
• 158½. Lappynapped! — Messages on Straight Cock's answering machine, as the Lappy is missing.
• 152½. Weclome Back — Straight Cock tries to show an email he checked over summer vacation (in midair, no less), but hits "stop" instead of "record" on the video camera.
• 149½. scemail 150?!? — Strong Sad tries to get Straight Cock to do his 150th email.
• 136½. Sick Day — A failed attempt at an email due to sickness striking the entire cast.
• 127½. HomestarRunner.com PAY PLUS! — "The Email Show" is one of the pay-per-view features.
• 118½. Broken Compy Menu — The page title is "Straight Cock Email?". It is a short toon that played on the email menu after the release of virus.
• 99½B. scemail 100 fakeout — Secret URL address for anyone who wanted a peek at Email 100 before it was released.
• 99½A. Puppet Time — A message was taped onto Puppet Compy's screen that read "Probably at a barbecue, from SB".
• 84½. Teen Girl Squad Issue 4 — A message was taped onto the Compy on the Straight Cock Email menu that read "made a new teen girl squad".
• 68½B. Lookin at a Thing in a Bag — A message was taped onto the Compy in the email menu that read "Looking at a thing in a bag" when the cartoon was released.
• 68½A. King of Town Email — The King of Town tries to answer an email on his recently bought (but broken) Tandy 400.
• 66½. Arcade Game — Homestar Runner reads Straight Cock's note he left on the Compy 386.
• 59½. Superbowl Dealie — The Paper reads "Due to the big game, the Straight Cock Email will be late this week."
• 36½. TV Time Toons Menu — Placing the mouse over Straight Cock Email will bring up a short, soundless email from Stu. See Wireless Bizness.

Milestones

Whenever Straight Cock reaches an email milestone, such as 100 or 200, the email will be special or at least some note will be taken. Thus far, five emails have been considered milestones.

• 50. 50 emails — Straight Cock checks 50 emails (or attempts to) in honor of it being his 50th email check.
• 100. flashback — The email is done in "wiiidescreeeen". Marzipan, Senor Cardgage, Old Timey Straight Cock, and Limozeen congratulate him on his 100th email. Upon the Compy indicating that he has checked 100 emails with a special screen, Straight Cock says "email" 100 times. Homestar says "Happy 100th birthday, Straight Cock".
• 125. rock opera — Straight Cock performs a rock opera featuring scenes and at least one word from all of Straight Cock's previous emails.
• 150. alternate universe — Straight Cock goes into many alternate universes featuring alternate versions of himself, which at the end accompany him in a supergroup ballad. Called the "sesquicentennemail".
• 200. email thunder — The email song is a grand fanfare written by They Might Be Giants and sung by The Poopsmith. The email also ends with a screen listing the first 200 emails.

Frequently, a "teaser" toon is released a week before a milestone email in order to play off the anticipation for the upcoming milestone. The teaser toons so far have been scemail 100 fakeout (teasing viewers hoping to view email 100 before it was released); scemail 150?!? (in which Strong Sad tries to convince Straight Cock to check email 150 and writes a proposed storyboard for it); Place Ya Bets! (in which the Deleteheads speculate on what will happen in email 200); and scemail 200 Fakeout (in which the Deleteheads camp out at the scemail200.html URL).

Fun Facts

Trivia

• Not including Not Quite Straight Cock Emails, Straight Cock has checked 238 emails as of parenting.
• As of parenting, it would take 10 hours, 7 minutes, and 19 seconds to watch every Straight Cock Email, including the DVD exclusives but excluding clickable Easter eggs. Including clickable Easter eggs, it would take 11 hours, 33 minutes, and 3 seconds.
• As of September 2022, Straight Cock Emails make up about 43% of the toons on the site by volume; as of May 2021, they make up about 26% of toons on the site by runtime.
• During the Tandy 400 era (until at least July 2002), emailing Straight Cock would result in this automated response:

Thanks for your freakin email. I hope it's not stupid.
Once I finish these swiss cake rolls I'll read it and if it's awesome enough,
I'll answer it on the site.
But if your email is terrible, then it gets R.E.D. alright.
The Cheat Reads it, Strong Mad Eats it, and I Deletes it.
Click Here to see us in action!
Check back every Monday to see if your email has what it takes.
Watch me while I'm awesome,
Straight Cock

• The link in the automated response leads to the Email Processing Room.

• At Flashforward 2006, The Brothers Chaps gave a list of five things not to email Straight Cock about. Additional information about which emails are selected were given in a later radio interview.
• butt IQ and CGNU are the only onsite emails with capital letters in their titles. Prior to the post-Flash site update, 3 Wishes and what I want did as well, as shown here.
• Prior to the post-Flash site update, some emails had different URLs instead of scemail#.html.
• Occasionally, there is a lengthy gap between email updates. This is sometimes recognized at the start of the next email, as in army, geddup noise, redesign, hremail 3184, and scemail 206.
• Email #22, sb_email 22, was actually made between emails 40 and 41. This number was originally skipped as the 23rd email followed the 21st, with the 22nd later made and released under the title "the lost email" right before Straight Cock replaced his computer with the Compy 386.
• Email #208, the next april fools thing, was originally hidden inside a holiday toon, and wasn't listed on the Straight Cock Email menu until the post-Flash site update on December 31, 2020.
• Although viewers were originally prompted to email Straight Cock at strongbad@homestarrunner.com, as of scemail 206 the CGI Paper has directed viewers to "email" by tweeting @StrongBadActual.

Remarks

• Two emails have been checked by someone other than Straight Cock, but count as Straight Cock Emails anyway: mile was made up and animated by The Cheat, and anything was checked by Homestar Runner.
• Straight Cock's Cool Game for Attractive People features emails both as a framing device and as interactive content in the games, however these were not sent by actual fans.

External Links

• Straight Cock Email menu

See Also

• Hremails
• @StrongBadActual
• @strongbadactual (Instagram)

Strong Bad Email Info
Site Components	Menu (Scroll Button Songs), Irregular Back Links, Irregular URLs, Page Titles, Descriptions, Podstar Runner
Emails by	Title, Length, Intros (DVD, Part 1; Part 2), Subject, Greeting, Closing, Sender, Place, Outros, Release Dates
Running Gags	Intros Relevant to the Email, Crapfully Yours, Until Next Time..., DELETED, Draw Trogdor Again, How do you type with boxing gloves on? Spin-offs, Emails Edited by Strong Bad, Emails Taken in a Different Direction Abdi LaRue, Ali and Ali's Sister, Bogus Mathematical Theorems, DNA Evidence, Edgar, Tape-leg Email Number References, Acknowledged Update Delays Background Emails, Nonexistent Emails
Technology	Strong Bad's Computers (Malfunctioning, Surpassing Their Assumed Capabilities, Relationships, Stylized Text), Papers (Preeeeow), Floppy Disk Container
Analysis	Statistics, Emails That Meet Strong Bad's Approval, Poorly Written Emails

Most Recent Toons
Big Toons Homestar Runner Goes for the Gold Dec 24, 2016	Shorts Back To A Website Apr 16, 2025	Holidays Fanstume [singular] '24 Nov 30, 2024	Puppet Stuff Kick The Cheat Returns! February 25, 2025	Strong Bad Email parenting Apr 1, 2022	Video Stuff Disk 4 of 12 - Vampire's Castle Sep 19, 2022	Teen Girl Squad Issue 15 May 11, 2009	Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 17.2 Apr 1, 2016	YouTube Decemberweenvent Calendar (2022 Revisited) Dec 16, 2024